Disclaimer: I do NOT own Teen Titans. If I did, the show would not be airing on Cartoon Network, and there would be a lot more nudity.

Pairing: Slade/Robin

Warning: Rated PG

A/N: This is my submission for The Ducklings Easter event on Facebook. If you are NOT part of the group at this very moment you are missing out and need to check it out at once!

This drabble is, in my opinion, considered crack and completely out there by my standards.

Robin muttered to himself as he weaved through person after person in the super market, trying to make his way past the cash registers that were clustered with people with shopping carts filled to capacity. The shortest lineup looked to have a fifteen minute wait time and he muttered annoyed to himself as he made his way to the back of the grocery store, with only one purchase in mind. The things he did for his teammates...

Beast Boy had pouted and pulled his puppy eyes (literally), claiming that they couldn't have an Easter Weekend Celebration without colouring eggs. There was an unofficial scavenger hunt amongst the Tower (surprisingly Raven's idea), gift baskets full of candy and chocolate (Starfire had been banned from the marshmallow peeps when she'd gotten extremely hyper and began fluttering around the common room like a humming bird), turkey, scallop potatoes, glazed ham and many other food concoctions that were various combinations of Beast Boy's tofu and Cyborg's own cooking genius. There was even a Jump City Egg Relay Race scheduled in the largest park in town that most of the Titans were participating in late Monday afternoon. So, without anything to do, Beast Boy had pulled his eyes and now Robin was striding quickly towards the dairy isle in the super market, coming upon the eggs in question.

There was a single carton left sitting almost innocently in the middle of the large refrigeration unit. This was the fourth stop that he'd had to make because everyone was out of eggs! The Titan's leader quickly reached out to swipe up the carton of eggs when another, much larger pair of hands reached out and grasped the box as well, both of them now holding on to opposite sides of the container.

"I believe I saw these first," came a rough voice.

Hello muscle! Robin's voice sang inside his head when the first thing he noticed when glancing up was a wall of ab muscle encased in a tight white T-shirt. Afterwards, after his brain had malfunctioned a bit, he racked his eyes upwards he noticed a chiseled jawline encased in a trimmed white goatee. The man had white, short and shaggy hair that looked completely sexy on him. There was a black eye patch over his right eye and a piercing silver-grey eye registered on his person.

Robin was so stunned by the man's looks that he let go of the carton of eggs. Mr. Muscle's mouth formed into an unbelievably gorgeous smirk as he turned away, his prize resting in his big hands. Those hands...holy cow!

"Hey!" The hero exclaimed, coming back to his senses. The various people rushing around in a panicked frenzy to get last minute Easter supplies didn't even bat an eyelash at either of them. The man continued to expertly manoeuvre around the shopping carts, making his way towards the front cash. Robin grabbed the first thing he could get his hands on, which just happened to be a stick of butter as they were in the dairy isle and threw it. It was a testament to his skills as a hero that he managed to not hit any civilians.

Robin ran quickly forward just as the butter smacked the carton of eggs out of Mr. Muscle's hands. The Titan jumped forward, sliding on his ass and thighs as if this were a baseball match and he was hitting home base and caught the container before it could make contact with the supermarket flooring. From his point on the floor he could see the larger man's single eye widen in surprise. Robin couldn't help but smirk at him; it was second nature to him to taunt and tease, even in the pettiest of situations.

"Thanks for keeping these warm for me," Robin said grinning. He jumped up from his spot when his opponent made a grab at him. No way was he getting these eggs. These were for Beast Boy and his stupid puppy eyes! The Titan's leader made a mad dash for the mechanical doors of the supermarket, not once looking behind him.

He was in civilian clothes today so he wasn't able to use his grappling gun to quickly get away. It didn't matter though because two blocks later he breathed a sigh of relief when he realized, stupidly, that no one was chasing him.

He was leaning against a brick wall outside a small bakery, eggs clutched tightly against him. He didn't have his motorcycle either, but he wasn't that far from the Titans underground path that led across the water. He'd just have to walk a little bit further and he would find the secret entrance.

Beast Boy better appreciate this!

Robin realize, as he approached the hidden tunnel, that he hadn't actually paid for the eggs he was carrying. He'd been so engrossed with Mr. Muscles that he had simply run out and hadn't even thought twice about the various long lineups he had been dreading when he first walked into the grocery store.


He didn't have much time to contemplate his theft when a large shadow dropped directly in front of him, seemingly out of nowhere. He pretends that he didn't almost jump five feet in the air.

"How did you...?" Robin trailed off, his sapphire eyes wide with disbelief.

It was the guy from the supermarket! Mr. Muscles (and okay, he really needed to think of a better name than that, even if it was an extremely accurate name and he was was only thinking it in his head) was watching him with mixed expressions of amusement, contemplation and a little confusion. Almost as if he was trying to solve a troublesome problem.

When the older man took a step forward Robin shot to attention, cradling the carton to himself, narrowing his eyes to watch the man's moves. Mr. Muscles shot towards him, twisting around the hero's kick and landing a kick of his own on the teen's back. Robin's body shot to the ground and thankfully the eggs were unharmed. He jumped back up only to quickly dodge a punch coming straight for his head. He only knew one person with kicks like that. Kicks that hurt! Kicks that he'd gotten quite acquainted with over the years.


When the person in question chuckled darkly he was one-hundred percent assured that this was Slade. He would recognize that tone anywhere.

Oh god I thought Slade was hot...IS hot! This is like a really bad fantasy crossover! My dreams are going to have a field day.

"Are we really fighting over a carton of eggs...that is just, that is really...just stupid," Robin said, pointing out the obvious. Never mind the fact that both of them were mask-less, Slade knew his secret identity and apparently the secret entrance to Titans Tower as well.

"I think I may have found a better focus than the eggs you have," Slade finally spoke, straightening up, not longer trying to harm him. His leer was penetrating and Robin's brain tried to short-circuit again but the Titan leader was having none of it. The villain was just trying to distract him that was all. Slade sauntered up to him, his body built, toned and completely perfect in every way. The hero was having a hard time focusing on anything other than the warm body heat that Slade was emitting when he got into his space. "Then again the focus has always been on you, little bird."

"I am way too old for you to be calling me that any more." Robin pointed out, his higher brain function screaming at him to shut up. That Slade wasn't supposed to know who he was. But the man was touching his shoulder now (oh god those arms!), smirking at him in a way that made the teen's jeans a little too tight. Fucking teenage hormones. He was getting aroused by his arch-enemy! What was wrong with him?

Villains aren't supposed to look this good!

"You have gotten older, haven't you?" Slade's voice purred suggestively. "Egg-cellent."

"Did you...?" Robin couldn't help but gape. "Did you just make an egg joke?"

Am I in the twilight zone?

"Imagine my surprise when I realized that the striking young man with egg-ceptional blue eyes, who couldn't keep said eyes off of me, was actually Robin of the Teen Titans," the villain smirked, eyeing him up and down. "Much more interesting than a carton of eggs that I really didn't need anyway."

There is something in the air, I just know it...

There were much more important things to worry about, however, like the fact that Slade was kissing him...

I have definitely entered a different dimension...

His mind stopped thinking at this point for the simple reason that Slade's tongue, in his mouth, was completely A-okay with him.

When Robin entered the Tower thirty minutes after reaching the secret tunnel, decorations had been hung everywhere in the Tower. He made it to the common room, carton of eggs clutched directly under his arms. There was a really impressive grin on Robin's face, a one-eighty switch to what he'd been sporting when he'd left the Tower. Beast Boy, in puppy form, bounced over to him, barking happily.

"Have a fun trip to the super market?" Raven's raspy voice questioned from the kitchen, brewing a pot of tea. BB, back in his human form, had already taken the eggs to the table and was explaining to Starfire how they were going to paint them.

"It was fine."

Raven gave him an amused look.

"That is an egg-traordinary looking hickey you've got on your neck," she said. Cyborg burst into laughter from the couch in front of the television. It was at this point that he realized that there was a live fed from the Tower secret entrance broadcasting on the common room T.V.

Robin blushed scarlet red but the grin remained on his face for the entire evening. Especially when Slade met up with him later that night and gave him his real Easter present.

The End

A/N: The Ducklings event stated that I had to use "egg" in some way, shape or form. I came up with this idea when I went to three different stores on Thursday and they had NO eggs left. Please excuse the VERY bad "egg" puns as this is crack and I did what EVER I wanted, regardless if it made sense ;)