This is a spoiler crossover story between House and Devil May Cry…I posted it because it's been bugging the crap out of me. It's like an ich that wouldn't go away…

Warning: This story has spoilers of my "Noah the Devil Huntress" series and if you don't like, don't read.

DO NOT FLAME ME FOR IT!!! IT WAS BUGGING ME!!! Btw, I don't own House or Devil May Cry….Lol I wish.

Chapter 1: "Symptoms of Stupidity"

Noah was running pretty fast. She zoomed passed people and children, trying not to run them over and hopefully, some doctor could help the unconscious Dante on her back. 'What on Earth could be wrong with him? I thought half demons couldn't get sick….?' She asked herself.

Of coarse, she was one herself, but, most of her life, she was kept in the dark. Meeting the Hellsing Organization, she and her former friend, Tess, got caught in an ongoing war between vampires, demons, and of coarse, humans. Meeting her father, a demon lord who was pretty much behind the whole war fiasco, awakened the demon inside her. She learned how her mother really died, and that he was behind it. For that, she now holds a grudge against him, and will stop at nothing to destroy him.

Dante had agreed to help. And boy, did she need it. At first, she couldn't handle the constant act of being "hit on", but it got easy to deal with after she started threatening his manhood. He immediately, stopped doing his childish acts around her. He did, however, "compliment" on how big her breasts were. It still got on her nerves, but she managed to ignore it.

It just pissed her off when other guys did so. Strangely enough, she could manage Dante's "compliments", but not other perverts. At least, it was strange to her.

Dante coughed, blood spewing from his lips. He was pale; paler than his normal skin color and his eye color was beginning to turn red.

"Not good, he's about to instinctively devil trigger…" she said to herself. She put him down, flat on his back, and moved ten feet away from him. She held her breath as he triggered. Almost immediately after triggering, he went back to his human form again. She stared at him as her opened one eye, then, the other.

She rushed to his side, still unable to sense his condition. Although, he still looked pretty bad, he was now conscious…and rubbing her ass. She fought the urge to punch him. "Dante…Will you quit that, please?" she hissed through her teeth.

"I can't help it…" he said, hoarsely and weak. He was smiling; though, it was also weak from his condition.

"God, you're such an idiot." She hissed. He chuckled and fell unconscious again.

She stared at him and blushed. 'He's cute when he sleeps.' She thought. Realizing what she thought just now, her face went redder than Hinata Hyuuga. 'Oh, God…What am I thinking? That's not right…He….' Her mind trailed off to that dreaded memory…

They were both drunk out of their ever loving minds, and when they arrived home…Well, let's just say it wasn't nice for Dante the next day. He frequently teased her about it….and it just got on her nerves, that much more.

She tried her best to shake off that damn memory…but it didn't work. It was like an incurable disease to her. 'You just had to trick me into that bar room…' she glared at him. 'I'm gonna kill you when you wake up, Dante.' She thought silently before she grabbed him, and positioned him on her back. She began running like hell as the rain began to fall.

-Hospital-

House wobbled over to Cuddy's office. She was in the middle of a meeting, so he decided to get her attention by pointing a laser at her breasts. The two people she was having a meeting with, noticed the red dot on her chest and pointed at it. She looked down, then, followed the laser to its owner outside her door. She went red at the embarrassing position she was in. She rushed out her room as the two people stared at her.

"House! What are you doing? Don't you see I'm busy?" she stared at him, waiting for a reply. He just stared down at her and smiled. "Those people can wait. I want a raise." He said out of the blue. She frowned at him.

"Are you still bugging me about a raise? You never give up." She shook her head. He just stared at her. She suddenly caved under his stare. "I'll think about it."

He grinned happily at her. "It's about time you gave in." his face was closer to hers. She was redder now than she was in the room.

"Don't even think about it." She growled.

"I wasn't." he protested. He pulled his face out of her atmosphere so she can catch a breath. She breathed in and out to catch up with her breathing.

They heard a voice down the hall. When they looked to see who it was, they saw a brunette with a limp, silver haired guy on her back. She was wearing a white collar shirt that was wet and revealing her black turtle neck half shirt. Her long, Japanese style skirt was wet and sticking to her combat boots. They just stared as they walked over to her.

"How do you think she can carry him like that? I mean, the guy on her back looks well over a hundred pounds." Cuddy nearly whispered to House. She looked up at him…Only to find out he wasn't paying attention to her. He was practically drooling over the girl in front of them. She frowned at him.

"Ummm…."Noah looked confused. She coughed to get their attention. "I have a sick Devil Hunter here, can anyone just pay attention to me, just for one second?" she said aggravatedly. Her eye was twitching now, because the guy in front of her was drooling over her breasts, and the girl was glaring at the guy who was drooling over breasts.

She coughed again. "Didn't you hear me? I have a SICK Devil Hunter here, and he needs medical attention, and I assume you two are doctors, so can you help me?" She nearly shouted. It got their attention. 'Finally…' she thought. They looked at her with a dumbfounded look. She glared at them with a look that would scare even the baddest of bad guys.

They stared at her. She stared back at them. "A little help here…Please?"

Well, that's chapter one. Review please.