Authors Note:

Okay this is just a strange little exercise that I decided to type. I'm trying to get into the mindset to write a Mello/Near fic. It my be very pants as Near and I are not the best of friends, so feel free to dissect and examine every little trait that I give to Near and please do not be worried about offending me as this is only a trial piece. Just do not flame just because of little traits that you do not like.

This is not an intended yaoi fic, it's more simply a 'possibility' with a confused and hormonally charged Mello (yaoi could possibly rear its head at a later stage, though if I do head that way I will do so gingerly, and after consulting two of the biggest Near/Mello fans I know, Raven Ehtar and zchocolatebunniesrulezworld, I'm far from ready to tackle one of those solo.)

Please be kind.

Disclaimer:

I do not own Death Note. I just molest it on a regular basis.

Unadulterated Leap.

Chapter One: It's Better When They Come In Pairs

Mello trotted through the spacious halls of Wammy's House. For once, he was without a certain red-headed gamer in tow. Matt had an assignment to complete for literature class this afternoon and his essay was currently trapped in the limbo of his computer, which was reluctant to show him anything but the blue screen of death. When Mello had left him, Matt was sitting amongst a scattering of micro-chips, motherboards and plastic, his fingers clawing at his thick mass of red as he snarled and swore and attempted to rebuild the blasted computer.

He would succeed, Mello was sure of it. The boy always did.

His fingers curled around a rectangular bar as he nibbled on a corner. No resounding snaps today, he was feeling pretty, well for lack of a better word, he was feeling mellow.

He trotted happily past a cracked doorway, paused, cocked his head and backed up.

He was greeted by the sight of Near, rear in the air and hand stretched out, groping around under his bed. The boy's posterior wiggled slightly as he shuffled deeper under the piece of furniture, embedding himself to his shoulder.

Mello slammed the door open and filled the frame with his body, hands on hips and chocolate bar held between his teeth. "Now there's a pretty sight for first thing in the morning." He sneered around the confectionery.

Near carefully extracted himself from beneath his bed, accomplishing the task with far more dignity than should have been possible, and swiveled around to face the blond boy standing in the doorway. His hand moving to bury itself in his snowy locks.

"Good morning Mello."

Mello snorted at the greeting. He and Near, they didn't really get on. Near was too synthetic for Mello's tastes and Mello was too boisterous for Near to try to identify with. The forced pleasantry brought a bitter taste to Mello's throat, like swallowing after vomiting.

"Cut the crap Near." The blonde sighed, his good mood dissolving into irritation already. "You're up to something and I want to know what."

Near wrinkled his nose at the accusation, his hand disentangling itself from its snowy bindings. "You are mistaken Mello. I am merely searching for a misplaced item."

Mello's brow quirked as he snapped off another piece of chocolate. "Oh really? And what is this elusive item that you have misplaced?"

Near said nothing but rolled backwards onto his hands and lifted a bare foot. Correction, lifted the mismatched bare foot. His other foot was socked.

Mello snorted, the partially melted chocolate dribbled down his throat and caused him to cough and choke.

"A sock?"

Near nodded.

"But haven't you got a ton of others?"

Near nodded again and Mello frowned.

"So why don't you just take a second sock from another pair?"

Near's twisting hand paused and his stoic gaze pinned Mello rigid. A shudder snaked its way up and along Mello's spine, Near's eyes freaked him out. They reminded him of those belonging to a shark. A Great White to be precise. Great, dark, lidless orbs that just watched you, studied you. More looking through you than looking at you, like you weren't there. Like you were insignificant. Dead and emotionless eyes.

A second shudder wracked Mello's body.

"That would hardly solve the under-lying problem of the missing sock." Near said, blinking at last. "That would simply postpone the issue until I run out of pairs."

Mello rolled his eyes and curled his toes beneath his too long pant legs; he didn't bother with socks himself unless he was stuffing his feet into his beaten sneakers.

"For God's sake Near, it's just a poxy sock! It's not like it's something important."

Near's lids contracted slightly around his wide eyes, watching Mello curiously. "All things are relevant to one situation or another." He said, putting his weight onto his hands and pushing to a stand. A stand not unlike that of L's. "Would you be so swift to condemn a subject's fate had it been-" In a movement so fast that Mello tensed, screwing his eyes shut as Nears hand propelled itself towards his face. "This?"

Mello cracked an eye slightly, cautiously, before snapping his head toward the object in Near's hand. Then he scowled. "Hey, give it back!"

Mello's half eaten chocolate bar, taken hostage by Near's quick fingers, dangled precariously a scant few inches in front of the blonde's nose.

"I'm sure you have spares Mello. If you were to misplace this half consumed sweet you could always accumulate another fairly easily from your vast collection."

Mello made a wild snatch, and missed as Near skittered back a step. "It's not the same! I haven't misplaced it, you've stolen it."

"Then imagine for sake of argument that you have misplaced it. Would you not search for it?"

Mello fell back on his haunches, head inclined to his left and arms folded over his chest, a childish and petulant pout twisting his lips. "No."

Near raised a disbelieving brow. "You wouldn't?"

"No. There'd be no point. If I'd lost it someone would have either tossed it into the trash or eaten it." Mello grumbled. "This is hardly a good comparison to your missing sock, Near. I know there are some strange habits in this house but I doubt very highly that there is a kid who sits and nibbles on clothing all day. Now, give me back my chocolate."

For a moment Near studied the confectionery realizing, much to his distaste, that his fingers were now coated with a thin layer of melted cocoa. He had never really cared all that much for sweets, and to have chocolate now melting on his fingers made his stomach churn.

As he reached the bar out to Mello, the blonds eyes lit up and he fairly snatched it from the pale boy's fingers and stuffed almost the whole remaining half into his mouth.

Near studied Mello's face as he devoured the remaining portion and swallowed, his lips pulling into a tiny smile. Licking his fingers, Mello slid his eyes to the chocolate staining the pale boys own pads as Near raised his hand to his mouth and followed suit. Gingerly licking them clean with a delicate little pink tongue, before wiping the damp digits on the hem of his white pajama shirt and smearing a little brown smudge where he hadn't quite cleaned all of the chocolate off.

Mello swallowed sharply, Near's actions seemed, well kind of erotic. Like what he'd seen those women do on those sites Matt had shown him, only what they'd cleaned from their fingers hadn't look quite as innocent as chocolate, nor as appetizing.

"Maybe the other sock has been thrown out." He suggested and swept a hand around the room, guiding Near's gaze over the immaculately clean and clutter-free floors. "Because if you can't find it in here I doubt it's here to be found."

Near blinked slowly and shuffled over to the dresser, tugging a draw open and pulling a crisp clean set from its depths.

Near frowned, his nimble fingers paused from unbuttoning his soiled shirt. "Perhaps, though I believe I would have remembered such completing such an activity."

Just as Near dipped one shoulder free of his shirt Mello rolled his gaze away, a rosy hue scattered across his nose. It wasn't like he was attracted to Near or anything.

Fourteen was a tough time for a kid. By then most had started undergoing the more physical changes that puberty entailed, breasts developing and periods beginning for girls. And for boys… well, Mello had decided that he'd rather have undergone those changes than what he was suffering through now. His voice cracked at times of high stress or emotion and, each and every morning he was reminded of his gender by the sudden rising of a particularly embarrassing part of his anatomy. After three days of waking to find that part of him had awoken before he had, Mello had decided to talk to someone about it.

Mello cringed and chanced a glance from between his lashes, and promptly wished that he hadn't. Near wasn't wearing a shirt anymore, he was in the process of crumpling it into a ball and dropping it to the floor. Mello shut his eyes again.

I n retrospect Matt hadn't been the wisest of choices, but he was his best friend. Matt's rather perverted and knowing grin did make him feel more awkward about things and when the red-head had dubbed him a 'hard-on with a face,' Mello had been less than impressed. Well hindsight is 20/20.

Feeling brave again, and convinced that he'd reigned in his hormones Mello opened both eyes. Near should've been dressed again by now…

Or not.

Thankfully Near had his back to him and couldn't see the hue deepen into a full on blush.

Near's bottoms had gone. And while his clean, new shirt was buttoned and hung halfway down his thighs, when he bent and lifted one foot to feed into the pant leg the shirt lifted, offering Mello a quick glimpse of pale flesh whose curve could only be one particular mound on a boy. Mello squirmed uncomfortably.

Damn hormones.

"Mello?" Near turned and flopped heavily onto his bed, lifting his foot to tug the sock free. "Are you feeling quite alright? You appear to be flushed."

Mello narrowed his eyes to slits, only a sliver of blue visible between his lashes. "I'm fine."

Near simply nodded and pulled apart a balled pair of socks and then drop his chin, confusion clouding his eyes.

Mello growled, partly in annoyance and partly in mirth. His hatred for that particular garment reinforced by the sight of Near holding a sock in each hand while a third fell into his lap.

They had found the missing sock.

Turning on his heel Mello stomped from the bedroom. "You know Near. It's better when they come in pairs."

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End Author's Note:

Okay, I was intending to have Raven and chocolatebunnies go over this first but after typing it I decided I would simply upload it and see how it's received. Any future chapters (if I decide to continue this) will only be posted once I've discussed it with the two aforementioned authors, if they are willing to accept the task. I was aiming for a bit of crack with this one but it seemed to have fallen short and the ending strikes me as well, kinda lame.

Please read and review.