A/N. This is a practice fan fiction that I wrote, just to see whether I can figure out how to upload them onto my account correctly. It's unbetad, but the inspiration hit me after having a few days practically drooling over the Remus/Tonks fandom after that unexpected but complete 'fan girl squealing material' from a scene in the Half Blood Prince film. (I think you all know which one I mean!)
Storyline: After the Battle of the Department of Mysteries, Remus checks on Tonks in St Mungo's.
Did I get her?
Remus sighed, running a hand through his greying hair as he walked wearily down the ward of St Mungo's. He'd just been accosted by a slightly more than usual erratic Mad-Eye, filling him in on the progress of his fellow order members.
"Kingsley's just been sent home" Mad-Eye had growled the moment he'd seen him. "I had him checked out just as a precaution. He'd taken a few hits." He'd then hushed his voice slightly, casting a look down the ward at a curtained off bed. "Nymphadora on the other hand…" he broke off, shaking his head forlornly before limping off.
As Remus reached the curtained off cubicle, he faltered. What would he say to her when she woke up? How much did she know? Shaking himself slightly he pushed the curtain aside and entered the cubicle.
The first thing he noticed was how pale she looked. The face he'd always admired for its bright, cheerful, and rosy complexion was now waxy and damp, a dark purple bruise gracing her delicate forehead. Remus gave a defeated sigh as her body lay immobile, only the gentle rhythm of her delicate breathing giving any indication that she was anymore than another body. Lost to the war.
Feeling the exhaustion of the last twenty four hours hit him; Remus sank into the chair at Tonks' bedside, his legs giving up his weight in relief at the simple act of resting. Taking Tonks' hand he merely watched her sleep, and waited.
It was several hours later when Tonks began to stir. Remus stood up in a flash leaning over her immediately, wondering whether he should alert a healer.
"me-gh" she mumbled incoherently, her hand clutching at his weakly, her face screwing up in what Remus hoped, was confusion and not pain.
"Tonks, can you hear me?" he asked urgently, moving his free hand to cup her cheek and watching her anxiously.
Tonks screwed up her face again, and Remus hoped he hadn't startled her with his loud questioning.
"Remus?" she murmured, the name uttered in a shallow breath as a pink tinge beginning to appear in her mousy brown hair.
Remus gave a small smile, exhaling a relieved sigh before answering "Yeah, it's me."
"My head…hurts" she murmured a little more strongly, and with, Remus was pleased to note, a small Tonks-like pout gracing her lips. "I need to…sit…up" she murmured, "head…swimmy."
"Can you open your eyes for me?"
With what seemed a great effort Tonks began to open her eyes, and Remus was glad for the dim light of only a bed side candle for her to adjust her eyes to.
After a few moments Tonks focused on him and he rewarded her with a smile.
"Hello!" he murmured softly, "How are you feeling?" he asked as he gradually tilted the head of her bed up.
Tonks thought hard, before Remus thought that maybe that was a bit of a difficult question for someone with so many injuries. She instead asked "What happened?"
Remus tensed before answering, thinking carefully before speaking.
"What do you remember?" he asked, stroking a gentle hand down the side of her head in comfort to her half delirious form.
Tonks frowned and blinked a few times blearily as she seemed to sift through her memories.
"There was the fight…we were outnumbered…was fighting Bellatrix." Her shallow breaths grew slightly more strong and steady as she spoke, but her eyes still constantly closed wearily. "I sent a curse at her but….' She stopped abruptly her eyes snapping open, a haunted look mixed with that of a hopeful one meeting Remus' gaze. "Did I get her?"
Remus bit his lip and forced back tears that threatened to come. The strong hope filled gaze of such a brave, loving woman, broke his heart. He hated that it was him that had to destroy such hope, fill her with the guilt of a survivor. The same guilt that he'd lived with for the last fourteen years. His composure threatening to crumble he squeezed her hand tightly and shook his head.
Tonks let out a small despairing breath and biting her own lip, nodded.
Remus squeezed her hand again tightly watching the auror attempt to control her emotions, even when in so much pain, both physical and emotional.
'Oh God!' she moaned, her voice still whispery, 'Did she hurt anyone else?"
This time Remus couldn't hold back and he felt the tears gently fall down his cheeks. He clutched at her hand this time, her now acting as his lifeline, and closed his eyes tightly trying to keep the tears at bay.
One look at his face told Tonks everything, and hers crumpled, tears spilling out of the corners of her eyes as she began to sob. Remus' arms encircled her gently as the guilt spread through her, more tears coming after the first. Holding her to his chest he cried with her, for her, and for Sirius.
A/N Thank you for reading. If you would like to review I will take all constructive criticism seriously and gratefully.