A/N: A rewrite of the one-shot I wrote a while back. There were a few errors that I fixed, that's all.
Disclaimer: Harry Potter is not mine. It belongs to J.K. Rowling, the lucky woman.
I miss you, you know.
I know that wherever you are right now, that you're probably shaking your head in disbelief. You never really grasped that I didn't hate you. You never figured out that there's a thin line between love and hate. You never knew that I'd crossed that line a while ago.
And I so desperately wanted to tell you that I loved you, but I was afraid that you'd reject me, just like when we were eleven.
I'm a Slytherin see, and we aren't brave at all. No, we seek the easy way out. It's the way we are.
It hurt, you know.
To see you glare at me with those emeralds that you call eyes. To see the utter disgust and loathing whenever you looked at me.
So I watched you, when you wouldn't be able to tell.
I watched how you smiled at Granger and Weasley, and how it made your face light up. That's why I hated them. Because they made you happy, and I couldn't.
I watched how you fell apart at the seems after you went to ministry. And I knew it was because your Godfather had fallen through the Veil.
I'm sure that you're wondering how I know about that? Bellatrix could never stop bragging about it.
But that's beside the point. The point is that I could see you falling from reality, and that nobody but I noticed it.
That made me hate them even more.
The called themselves your best friends, but they couldn't tell how much pain you were in, how much you hated yourself. They were so wrapped up in their own pathetic little lives that they didn't notice that you never ate. They didn't notice that you were numb to everything but pain.
That's how I found you. That night. I had noticed that you always disappeared after dinner, so I followed you once.
And I found you there, lying on the floor of the bathroom, in a pool of your own blood.
I noticed the shard of glass next to you, and all the other cuts so similar to the ones that took you away from me.
I remember how you smiled when you saw me, how happy you looked even though you were dying. I remember how light you felt in my arms as I picked you up and cried for you. I remember how you reached up and stroked my cheek and told me that you wouldn't live. And how I screamed that you had to, because if you weren't there, the world wouldn't be the same.
I remember the last thing you said to me. I can't forget it. It keeps repeating in my head, and I wish that you would've lived a little longer so I could tell you I feel the same.
I remember how you looked at me, took in a shuddering breath and said, "I love you Draco." And how you stopped moving, no matter how much I shook you, no matter how loud I screamed for you.
I never got to tell you that I love you too.