Well, here goes nothing.

I don't own HP or FMA, characters or plotline. This story is more like a subplot .... enjoy, and please Review.

Some confusion may occur, please tell me and I'll try to explain.

Prolly lots of cussing, especially since it's ED we're talking about.

There will be some hints about Boylove, mainly RoyEd cause I'm a fan like that. It won't be explicit, and all hints of pairings... okay, all hints of RoyEd is ultimately for humour. Humor. whatever. It's for fun. Don't take it seriously.

Rating. The day I move this fic to M Rating is the day I get 10 reviews saying 'change it to M!'. I trust ye people to be calm about some cussing and some nekkidness. No scenes, people. Remember, T. TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

Dear stupid Diary,

Damn this stupid magic, school and all.

Damn Mustang for making me and Al go to stupid magic schools for a stupid mission for a stupid lead on a stupid magical murderer.

Damn that stupid magic school not making me an exception to their stupid school uniform.

Damn the magical world for having this stupid Triwizard contest.

Damn the school for having to participate in the stupid contest.

Damn the school's headmaster for making me do the contest as well.

Damn that Dumbley-door or what's-his-name for making me compete even though I'm only half-official student and half-official ambassador from a military of Amestris.

Damn that Potter guy for being such a nuisance and somehow managing to get into competition.

Damn all three headmasters for agreeing that since Hogwarts got two competitors that it was fair to have one more from each school AGAIN.

DAMN that wooden cup for choosing me as the second competitor for Beaubaton (Who put my name in, anyways?! I put in a blank paper!).

DAMN this rule that says you can't refuse.

By the way;

D-A-M-N that-that guy for hitting on me. He only got a broken nose for that.

-Which reminds me.

D.A.M.N. that Bastard Colonel again for making me go to an ALL GIRL'S SCHOOL.


I can't believe I'm writing this. I can't believe I'm writing this. I can't believe I'm writing this. I can't believe I'm writing this. I can't believe I'm writing this. I can't believe I'm writing this. I can't believe I'm-

I can't believe I'm writing a humor fic.