Summary: Grimmjow and Ulquiorra set out on the mission to the Soul Society with their squad, and must deliver the letter. Problem: Multiple problems stands in their way, how will get through it all?
IMPORTANT Note: I was just going to place Grimmjow, and Ulquiorra in the Seiteirei but, it wouldn't be as much fun if I didn't screw around with their portal and send them on a small (Actually huge) adventure through the Rukon districts. Only two things stand in their way, or is there more?
Disclaimer: I do not own Grimmjow, Ulquiorra, Bleach, the Rukon Districts, the portals, or a copy on tape of Grimmjow losing to an old man. And if you think so, then I am then entitled to go to your house at 2:00 in the morning and constantly ring your door bell until you answer or go insane.
The Wall: Part 1
They walked out of the portal in the middle of a street, just about every being around stared oddly at them. "Here we are! And what a lovely place indeed."Ulquiorra happily looks around.
Grimmjow looks awkwardly at his surroundings. Small beaten up housing units lined down the road and stretched for miles. The place let out a rancid smell in which he ignored, or tried to anyway. "What are you talking about? This place is a dump! And just when I thought the shinigami would have a better place than us. It smells, and it looks like shit. And what is with all of the people, they are beaming at us like we're freaks. They're the damn freaks, gawking at nothing."
"Grimmjow, that was uncalled for and unnecessary to say. At least their place is not as white, you would have to admit that."
"Yeah, it's sad that us bad guys have to wear and live with the color white. But it's more ironic how shinigami wear black since they are the good guys. How are we supposed to find that very old man here in this trash heap."
"It's not trash!"
"Yes it is!"
"I think you are over reacting."
"Shut the hell up and look around, the buildings look like they would crumble just by staring at them!"
"The both of you are hysterical. It is more apprehensible that this slum is indeed filthy and rubbish, but within this conurbation is a civilization, so it can not be contemplated as 'Trash'. I would call it below-average standard living, it's basically poverty-stricken."
"Shut up Wonder-wuss, it's a dump. We don't need a genius to tell us that this place is pathetic and poor, it's kind of obvious."
"I am completely exasperated by your deplorable words. You just don't understand the complexity of my brilliance."
"The only thing that you are brilliant at is annoyance!"
Nnoitra jumped in Grimmjow's face waving his hands. "Hey Grimmjow!" He just stood there trying to ignore the other annoyance, that was a spoon. "Hey Grimmjow! Hello Grimmjow! Yooou...hoo.. Grimm!"
"Which way do we go?" He looked to the left and then the right there was no sense of direction to any of them. Were they lost?
"We have to look for a very, very old man, so we'll walk around until we stumble into one."
"Ohhhh…? You mean like that one." He points at a random old and poor stranger sitting outside of the building holding a cup with a few coins in it. Nnoitra pointed out.
"Well… He's old, works for me."
"Grimmjow, I don't believe that he is the one we are looking for. The one called Yamamoto is said to be rich and live at a higher estate."
"Ulquiorra, he's an old guy. In fact he's the oldest man that I had ever seen. Well, other than Barragan." He approaches the oldster and pulls him off the ground by the collar of his shirt, and forces the letter in his hand. "Alright Yamamoto, Aizen has a message for you."
He angrily bites Grimmjow's hand, and he threw himself to the side with reflexes of that of a healthy Olympian. "And just who are you and who in the hell is this Aizen? You've got some nerve disrupting my useless life. I am Kane, not some Yamamoto guy!"
He shakes his hand in pain. "Oww, you mother Fuc…."
"Grimmjow! I had asked you to stop cursing, and Ulquiorra had seconded that." Nnoitra interrupted.
"He is correct, you can't just go and be so harsh on the elderly."
"He bit me, that damz guy is going down!"
"Ha ha ha ha….. Grimmjow is fighting with an old man…. Hilarious!"
"Can it Yam!"
"I just can't stop laughing! You kill me Grimmjow! Ha ha ha ha ha!"
"Oh, I will kill you alright!"
The old man put up his fists and jumped around like a champion boxer. "You want to be beaten down by an old guy huh? Make my day!"
"That's it, you die!"
"Oh yeah?! You think you can get by me?
"Funk off loser! I'll cut you to pieces." He pulls out his Zanpakuto and runs at the man.
"Grimm, the cursing?"
"Shut up spoon! I didn't cuss!" He slashes at the man, but the old geezer jumped into the air with outstanding speed and brought his foot down onto the espada's back, and sent Grimmjow crashing face forward onto the ground.
"Damn tourists! You won't even get close to the Soul Society with that kind power!"
"The Soul Society doesn't have tourism during the fall and winter, you are all wasting your….."
"Wait. One moment elderly gentleman." The oldie looks at Wonderwiess. "Do you allude that we are not in the Soul aristocracy now?"
"Hell no! You be here in the ghetto of the Rukon Districts. You're in one of eighty. This is the eightieth district." He spits at the ground.
"Can you tell us anything about the Rukon?"
"No! So fuck off!"
"Whoa! I never imagined that he would be so hateful." Ulquiorra shakes his head in disgust.
"I have had enough! You…will…die!" Grimmjow pulls himself off the ground and raises his Zanpakuto. "Grin…" Ulquiorra smacks his sword out of his hand like a mother to a child.
"You will absolutely not attack this poor defenseless elder, especially with your released form. You are really taking this mission way too seriously. Our mission is to deliver a letter, not slaughter helpless old men."
"Back off, he is not defenseless! Did you see how fast he maneuvers? It's unbeliev…."
"Our mission is within the Soul Society, out here doesn't count so compose your anger and adrenaline for later. It's Aizen's orders."
"WHO FUCKING CARES ABOUT AIZEN!!!" He points his finger at Nnoitra who rose his hand. "Don't you dare say it damn spoon. I'll fucking kill you!"
"Umm… I'll keep my mouth shut now." He places his hand over his mouth and walks away.
"Alright Ulquiorra, I'll not waste anymore time on this asshole. And don't you better complain about my rudeness! Now lets go!"
"That's right chicken shit! Keep walking." Grimmjow turns away trying to ignore the oldie's insult.
"So where to now Grimmjow? This place is quite vast if you ask me, and to think that we are in only the eightieth district too." Ulquiorra continues to look in all directions.
"Yeah, so I guess we'll have to go to the first district to enter. Shit! I'll be walking forever." He picks up the letter and shoves it into his pocket. "Now, which way to the first district?"
"I don't know."
"Heeee…heee, we're lost. Ha, this is the funniest mission ever. Thank you Aizen! I needed something to do and I got this episode of Grimmjow losing to an old man as a bonus. Now only if I had recorded it." Snickered Yammy.
"I have seen it Yammy, if you ever want to view it then just come me."
"Damn it Ulquiorra! You and you're stupid eye recording crap."
"Yep! Ha ha ha ha ha. Aizen just has to see it, Grimm and his ass kicked by an old guy. Classic! We need to sell out copies." He then giggles uncontrollably.
"Ulquiorra!!! Now Yam will never let it go."
"You know, we can ask for directions I am sure that one of these lovely residents can put us on the right path. Just remember to ask them nicely though." Nnoitra suggested.
"They won't tell us. We… are… their… mortal… enemies. In fact we should slaughter their asses! So why does Aizen limit our stupid mission anyway?"
"But I don't want to hurt them, I only want to be their friend."
"They want you dead. So yeah, we'll let them kill you, that way both sides win. I don't have to tolerate you, and they have one less enemy to worry about."
"Are they really that hateful?"
"Yes, so don't get friendly with anyone. Okay? Alright back to the mission. Which way are we going? I really don't know or care. I didn't even want to go on this little adventure and I really didn't need all of you to tag along."
"Ranting is quite pointless, lets complete the mission already. We will need directions Grimmjow, so ask someone."
Wonderwiess sighs. " Isn't it obvious. Imbeciles! The ingress placed us in the trajectory of the assignment. So we go through the collinear here." He points down the road that is crowded by souls.
"What?! Speak English Einstein!"
"The Portal… has Placed… Us… in a Straight… Line… that is the Direction… of the Mission! Did you get all of that?"
Yeah! But you didn't have to say it like that, I am not an idiot! Uhhh…"
"I am right, you know."
"You better hope you're right about this or I'll give you hell."
"Oh, but trust me. I am much more superior at propensity then the rest of you. So my co ordinance is very precise, I have no flaws when it comes to basic directs. Now lets move, only seventy-nine and 9.9999 districts to pass through."
"Damn this sucks!"
"Calm down Grimmjow, I've heard that walking is very healthy."
"Yeah, but it only applies to humans moron."
"What about flying?"
"I can't do that either! We should be able to fly, but were all screwed over, so for Aizen's sake, we have to walk on this fucking mission! I knew he'd find away to torture me. Damn you Aizen!
A/N: Thank you to all of my reviewers for reading and even to those who read but don't review. (I know you're out there, Aizen's eyes are watching you. 0.0) But my special ThanX goes out to: LameKirby, FrEaKyAoIFan, and KSFWolfe. Grimmy and Ulqui plushies for you guys! Now please review. X)
If you were wondering about the Blitch word... I made it up. When you play video games and get screwed over by a glitch, then you can call it a bitch, but i prefer Blitch! XD