I promised myself that I wouldn't write any more tags and especially not for Lucifer's Rising. However, I had started this the night the episode aired and just needed to finish it.
This story is set early in the 5th season and would definitely spoil the ending of season 4.
Special thank you to both Red Hardy and Trasan - without your encouragement this story would have gone back in the box.
The request took Bobby by surprise. He'd been leaning over the open hood of an old truck trying to coax the beast back to life and had heard Sam leave the house and walk towards him. He'd been expecting the kid to say something like 'Bobby, you're wanted on the phone,' or even better, 'I made lunch. Is fried steak okay?'
Not 'kill me.'
A brief pause in the fluidness of Bobby's movements was the only indication he gave that he heard. Maybe if he ignored the kid long enough Dean would come out and save him – save them both.
Sam was persistent though and pressed again, "Please, Bobby, you have to kill me." The firm determination in the tone finally made the man stop, put down his tools and turn to face the youngster. Bobby didn't like what he saw.
Nothing had been the same since the boys had driven in hard from the convent five days ago, although nothing had really changed either. Yes Lucifer was out but, no the world had not ended. In fact the demon of all demons seemed to be taking his sweet time doing anything. So after much panic and fuss things had been forced to settle down. Well everything except those damn boys.
Dean was angry and silent, coiled like a snake, ready to strike just begging for a target while Sam was – well Sam was standing in the middle of the junkyard asking to be killed like it was the most rational thing ever.
"Bobby," Sam sounded way too reasonable. "I need you to do it."
The older hunter was perplexed. He looked for any signs that this was part of Sam's withdrawal although since killing Ruby, the younger man had been doing surprisingly well. Yes, he'd get the occasional shakes and he wasn't eating or sleeping properly, but so far that was the extent and Bobby really hoped they'd misse.d the bullet on this one, not sure any of them were ready to go through detox again. But Sam looked fine. Well as fine as the kid could be living with the knowledge that he'd become exactly what he was supposed to be; the man who broke the last seal and released Lucifer.
"Sam," he sighed, stubborn Winchesters, "No."
The young man stared at him for a long time then with a curt nod turned to go.
Bobby watched, not liking the purposeful way Sam moved towards the house. A chill prickled at the back of his neck, his worry notched and he called out. "Sam! Wait."
Sam stopped but didn't turn around.
"Why?" Bobby called out walking towards the kid. "Why do you want me to kill you?" He was stalling, terrified that if he just let Sam go this time, they'd find his body later. He still held grief and guilt about what happened between him and Sam after Dean died and was determined to hold more tightly this time.
"Bobby…" Sam just sounded exhausted now but Bobby couldn't let him off the hook, all the time hoping Dean would make an appearance. He could certainly use some backup on this one.
"No, Sam, you want me to kill you – I want to know why."
"Because Dean won't." It was said so simply, so matter of factly, for a moment the older man couldn't say anything.
"Well, I'd have to say that's a good thing," Bobby stated. "Your brother has been known to be right from to time when he gets around to hauling his head out of his ass." He watched Sam wince and knew he'd hit his mark. This wasn't about hurting the younger hunter, it never was but there were just some realities that needed reminding about and Sam continuing to breathe being a good thing, was one of them.
"You don't understand," the kid exhaled the words out, "the things I did-" he shook his head sadly. "I thought I was doing the right thing. And look how well that turned out. I'm dangerous, Bobby, dangerous. And we have no idea just how much worse it could get. I broke the last seal. Just like I was supposed to do… Everything I did to try and change Azazel's plan didn't mean shit squat in the end. Well, what if there's more to his plans? Ruby said Lucifer would reward me. I don't want a reward. And I damn well know that whatever the hell it might be isn't going to be anything any of us want – so you need to cut our losses. Kill me, Bobby. I'm too much a coward to do it myself."
"Coward?" Dean's words of almost a week ago fell from his lips. "You're many things, kid, but a coward isn't one of them." Bobby didn't fail to notice the irony.
"Everything I thought was the right thing to do turned out to be wrong," Sam continued on ignoring the older hunter's words. Damn, he was being way too reasonable about this. "I can't even trust myself anymore to pick out what I want for lunch. Dean can't trust me – my instincts are crap. What good am I? I'm a liability. Hell, I'm Old Yeller. Got a nasty case of rabies while trying to protect someone I love. And it didn't turn out too good for the dog now did it? It has to be done, Bobby, and I don't trust anyone else to do it. It's either you or the angels but I need to be put down. Now."
"You just said it yourself, Sam. Everything you think is the right thing to do, is wrong, so if you're hell-bent that this is the only way then we sure as shit know it ain't." He watched as Sam's own logic was turned on the kid. He supposed it wasn't fair to twist things around on an already confused man but Bobby would always do what needed to be done and although Sam thought otherwise, killing the young man wasn't one of them. But convincing the youngster that his reasoning behind this was flawed, was.
"Bobby, I'm just trying to protect my brother." The words were spoken low but overheard.
"And so am I."
Dean's voice startled them both. They hadn't even heard him leave the house.
Bobby heard Sam curse softly under his breath and he felt both relieved and saddened as he watched Dean moved towards them.
"How much did you hear?" Sam asked quietly as he turned to face his brother.
Bobby held his breath. Dean just looked so angry, Sam so lost.
Dean spoke to Bobby, his hazel green eyes fixed firmly on his brother as if he knew that with one look away, Sam could be gone. "Can you give us a moment?" he asked. "I need to talk with my brother."
Bobby hesitated a moment but when he saw Dean's eyes soften at the fleeting flash of panic on Sam's pale face, he was sure they'd be okay. And when he heard Dean starting to talk, he knew it.