So I wrote this fic a couple years ago and I just reread it. I noticed a few mistakes and decided to add a few things as well. Enjoy!

I do not own these amazing characters, they belong to J.K. Rowling. If I did Lily wouldn't have ended up with James...


What You've Become

Outside the little house the wind howled. The oak tree swayed in the breeze. Lily turned to look out the window every once in a while. She had an eerie feeling that some was watching her. Of course she had been feeling on edge recently. Not just about you-know-who gaining more power, but about her marriage tomorrow. Lily sighed and dropped her purse onto her bed. She looked around her room with a somewhat sad expression on her face. Her room, her life, and her childhood was going to be gone forever. There was war going on and she was meant to marry James.

True, she did love him. He went from being a self centered ass hole to a respectable gentleman, except for when he was around Snape. Severus had the ability to bring out the worst in people. She was not even immune to it. When ever Lily was around Snape at school she would feel completely at ease. As if nothing could ever go wrong. This was bad because Lily was no longer suppose to feel that way about him.

Lily opened her drawer and pulled out a tattered photograph of her and Snape on the swings when they were children. She was looking at the sky with a bright smile on her face. Snape was looking at her with a tiny grin. She felt her stomach drop. It hurt to even think about those times. Tossing the picture back where she found it, she left her bedroom. Her cat scratched at the door and she opened it to let in her pet. As she was about to close the door Lily heard a loud thud. On her green grass she spotted a black heap of something struggling to get up.

The figure slowly rose, cursing under his breath. Lily gasped and stormed over to him. "Severus Snape! What on earth are you doing here?"

Snape whirled around to see a fuming Lily glaring up at him. "Hello Lily," he said quietly.

"Hello Lily? I told you I never wanted to speak to you again. What are you doing outside of my house?"

He shifted on his feet uneasily. "I thought you were getting married today. I just wanted to see for myself," he realized what he was doing and stopped fidgeting. "So, where is your precious Potter?" He spit James' last name at her.

"He is with his own family. We're getting married tomorrow," she paused and looked away from him. "Why did you want to see me get married?"

He scoffed and looked down at her, "I needed to see it to believe it. Honestly, Lily, you were always so brilliant."

"James is a very respectable man, I'll have you know. There is no reason for you to see me off to marry him. I don't think of you anymore and you should do the same. That chapter of my life is over."

Snape's lip twitched, "Then why were looking at a childhood picture of us?"

Lily's mouth dropped, "I-I was just throwing away some garbage. Were you spying on me?"

It was Snape's turn to look surprised, "Uh, no I was just seeing what you were doing if you were not off marrying Potter,"

"So you watched me through my window?"

"What other choice did I have? If I had sent you an owl you most certainly would not have informed me."

Lily shook her head and crossed her arms. "Just go back to your precious master, Snape. Leave me alone,"

Snape looked down at his feet, "I just wanted to make sure you were alright. You should not be marrying him, you know."

Lily groaned and walked closer to him. "Why do you even care? I really don't get it. I'm a mudblood, remember!"

"Don't call yourself that," Snape mumbled. His dark eyes seemed to soften as he gazed at her.

"You called me that not too long ago,"

"It was a mistake. I wasn't lying when I said I was sorry. That was the worst thing I have ever done. Losing you was the most horrible event that has ever happened to me."

Lily looked like she was in shock. Snape was not one for sharing his feelings. "I do still care about you, Severus. I need to move on with life and you with yours."

Snape nodded defeated and turned to leave. Lily grabbed his shoulder and spun him around. He looked at her wearily. Lily softly pressed her lips to his. Snape went rigid for a moment and then wrapped his arms around her deepening the kiss. He tangled his fingers into her red hair that he loved.

Lily squeaked in surprise of his actions. She meant only to give him a good bye kiss. Moaning in softly she gave into Snape's desperate kisses. She ran her fingers through his hair, which was not greasy as so many people claimed, but silky smooth. She trailed her fingers down his chest and felt him shiver. Lily felt a tightening in her abdomen as Snape continued to kiss her. Lily's left hand got stuck in Snape's cloak. She realized that her wedding ring was caught on a loose thread. Her mind flashed to James and she pulled away from Snape breathlessly. The string snapped and her ring was no longer caught.

"What's wro-" Snape began.

"James," Lily said cutting him off, her chest heaving. "I'm sorry, Sev. Really I am."

Snape relaxed a bit at the sound of his old nickname coming from her lips.

"I'm going back inside and going to sleep," Lily said backing away slowly. "Alone." She added quickly.

Snape nodded and watched her go. Lily reached for the door knob and turned around. "Sev I, um, I," She stopped talking, looking a little unsure of herself. Snape watched her carefully.

"Yes?"

"Losing you was the worst thing that ever happened to me too. You'll always remain my best friend in my heart,"

Severus' mouth curved into a smile. He opened his mouth to reply, but then snapped it shut when he felt a familiar burning coming from his left arm. He clutched at the dark mark and hissed. When he let go he saw Lily looking at him sadly. "Don't come to see me again," she said softly. "It breaks my heart to see what you've become."

Their eyes met one last time and she shut the door. Snape stared longingly at the wooden door for a few moments before preparing to apparate to see his master. He did his best to mask his feelings and erase any trace of the love he felt for Lily before he disappeared with a pop.