Oneshot for Holy Metal Muffin Of Death. :D I'm SO sorry it's this late. I've been struck with creativity... for another story! D: So I finally got a break to write this for you. I hope you like it!

Hospital Rooms

I happen to hate it when my hikari wounds himself, or in this case when has to be wounded, whether by himself or me. It leaves me stuck in this Ra-damned death hall called a "hospital". Certainly no one could believe any healing occurs in a place where the food has a growl more fearsome than Zorc himself. Damn Marik had me stab my hikari to get closer to the Pharaoh's little posse. Which left my vessel in need of repair. It didn't matter that Ryou had been trapped in his soul room for weeks, I still considered the body as my real vessel. The less I have to deal with that whiny, back-stabbing, little flea the better. Ra knows I have already been betrayed enough times in my life, so I require none of his insignificant doings to save the Pharaoh.

Why would he even wish to save a 5000 year old spirit that is even more corrupt than me? I never hid my true nature, from Ryou at least, I've always been evil. The Pharaoh and his treacherous father have cloaked their disgusting ways with sugary words targeted at the masses. The earliest politicians, claiming their terrible decisions were to protect the people. Odd since it destroyed dozens of my family members to create those items used to protect. Traitorous dog! May Anubis curse his retched soul and deny him access to the afterlife.

I was startled from my musings at the sound of the door creaking open slowly. My eyes narrowed at the door as a cheerful nurse gestured to let someone unseen into the room. Since it was a private room they could only be here to see me. Fearing it was one of the Pharaoh's little gang, I quickly feigned sleep. The person entered and shut the door quietly. My skills as a former thief, the greatest of all time in fact, had not waned over the 5000 years in the Ring. They told me the person was obviously male, from the heavy sound of footsteps, and walking very fast towards my bed. It took all of my years of training and practice not to tense up in defense as the person reached my bedside. Luckily the person was not interested in hurting me as he chose to speak.

"Open your eyes tomb robber, I know you are awake." I felt my face twist into a sneer as I opened my eyes to see Marik. He wore a particularly annoyed expression on his face and I couldn't help but smirk at his displeasure.

"May I ask what's wrong with you tomb keeper?" Marik growled and practically flopped down on the bed beside me. He took a moment to get comfortable and then turned to tell me why he was so upset.

"They're like a bunch of kittens or something! Could they get any more innocent and naïve?" From the description it was pretty easy to tell just who he was referring to. The Pharaoh's group was indeed a bit too cute. They needed a wake up call to see just how sick and twisted the world really was, and soon they would get it as Marik and I furthered our plan. In the mean time I took it upon myself to… cheer Marik up a bit. We were partners in crime after all, it was the least I could do for the sheltered and spoiled tomb keeper.

"Oh they are indeed very innocent, but don't worry too much Marik. We'll teach them about the truth of the world soon enough. Until then, allow me to improve your mood." Marik started to say something as I swiftly cut him off with a harsh kiss, rolling my body on top of him. Marik struggled vainly beneath me as I made quick work of his defenses, prying into his seal mouth with my dexterous tongue. As soon as I made contact with his own tongue, he moaned and melted into me. Good to know my seduction techniques still work as well. His soft, womanish hands wound into my hair and gripped tightly. I slid a hand under his already short shirt to caress his abdomen. He arched up into my touch and moaned. I smirked and bit his lip slightly before pulling back.

Marik gasped noisily for air as I moved on to his swan-like neck. "S-stop tomb r-robber. This wasn't part of the plan!" I laughed darkly into his neck and bit down enough to make him gasp. As I released and pulled back to admire my work, I could see the small wound already bruising beautifully. And just as expected the harshness put Marik into a nice submissive mood. He didn't protest as I ripped away his shirt. His caramel chest gleamed in moonlight filtering through the window. I let my fingers play with his hardened nipples, drawing pleas and whines from the lovely tomb keeper's mouth. So easy to forget this devious little creature was only a teenager.

"We don't have any lubricant…" The small protest was mumbled and half-hearted. I'd already worked his young body into a flurry of hormones and desperation. I smiled viciously down at my prize from my spot straddling his slim waist.

"Don't worry gorgeous creature, I have access to the oldest lubricant known to man." He looked up at me in confusion, surveying my tight jeans and pocketless shirt for any form of lubricant. Finding none he raised an eyebrow up at me and I smirked. I leaned down and kissed him wetly on the mouth. I was enough to send him into a panic.

"Spit? You think that will be enough?! I'm… Fuck Bakura I'm a virgin!" I laughed as loudly as I could in the hospital room without attracting attention. He assumed I'd never dealt with a blushing virgin before.

"I'm aware of that Marik. I'll take care of you. I've been around 5000 years, only my vessel is a virgin." Marik didn't seem too comforted so I kissed him passionately and started to remove his own extremely tight jeans. He murmured protest into my mouth, but otherwise just kept quiet. When I had him down to his soft cotton boxers I stripped off my own shirt and made quick work of my jeans. I straddled him again, pressing our hips very close. Marik jumped slightly and moaned a little too loud. I clapped a hand over his mouth and glared. "Quiet! I'm not looking forward to explaining this situation to a nurse thank you." Marik blushed as he glared back.

"I can't believe you're going to rape me in a hospital room tomb robber." I smirked down at him and rubbed our hips together roughly. He moaned again, quieter but with just as much pleasure coating the sound.

"I don't think your arousal would call this rape." He glared but I ignored it as I kissed him again. With his mouth distracted I quickly tore off our last articles of clothing and practically slammed our hips together. He cried out loudly into my mouth as I smothered the sound. I made sure to get my mouth very wet from the kiss, already ready for the main course of this little rendezvous. As I pulled away I stuck a few fingers in my mouth and coated them, much to Marik's apparent pleasure. Unfortunately for his fantasies, I have no interest in giving him a blowjob, so he can just forget about that. Now if he was interested in giving one, I'd be more than willing to receive. I'd always been fascinated by the concept, since they weren't a common practice back in Egypt.

I used my free hand to spread his long, tanned legs. I could tell from the small panicked expression that crossed his face that he was ready to bolt when push came to shove. I was not going to let that happen. The King of Thieves does not pleasure himself. He always has people willing to do that for him. So I quickly finished with my fingers and shoved one inside of him. He yelped but I was prepared and had a hand over his mouth in an instant. He didn't even bother glaring as his frightened face peered up at me. With a sigh I removed my hand and looked down at him, never ceasing my actions between his legs.

"Have no fear. You will enjoy this. You'd enjoy it even more if you relaxed and allowed me to work in a less tense area. The way you're tensing will cause you pain when we begin." Marik didn't look too happy, but complied and tried to relax his lower half. It worked for the most part and I could tell the relief was instant as his face cleared of the pain. I smirked and jabbed my finger in the direction of his prostate. He moaned bit his lip as I pressed down on that wondrous spot.

"B-Bakuraaaa…" Now that's a pleasing sound. My name on his lips sent a jolt of pleasure straight between my own legs. I allowed him some more pleasure and stroked his arousal as I pressed down on his prostate again. He cried out and pulled a pillow over his face to smother the sound. Using the distraction to maneuver another finger inside of him, he didn't even feel a thing. Following the same pattern I worked another inside of him and within minutes he was ready.

I withdrew, much to his displeasure, and spat into my hand. By now the hormones had taken control and stopped anymore fear or tensing. Now he was just eager as I slathered my member. He rose up and kissed all over my neck. I growled in pleasure and shoved him back down onto the bed as I finished with the saliva. He looked beautiful sprawled out on the crisp white sheets. His bronzed skin glistening and his glorious legs spread wide just for me. His face was a mixture of pleasure and want as I positioned myself. His hands held tightly onto my shoulders and his legs wrapped around my waist as I sunk in. His relaxed state ended up cushioning most of the pain, leaving him blissfully aware of the pleasure as my cock stroked along his prostate.

"Ahhhmm…" Finally sheathed, I leant down further and kissed his neck as he tossed his head back. My hips started the rhythm and I slammed into his pleasure spot. He bit the pillow to keep quiet as I used my mouth to show my pleasure to him, kissing and biting his neck. How unfortunate for him that he doesn't have a collared shirt. Let him show these scars off. I ran my hands down his back, feeling the raised and uneven skin of his markings. I could feel the language of my people etched into the soft skin of his back. I felt the delicious thrill of it hit my groin and speed me up further. Marik was practically wanton as I pounded into his needy body. Ah those precious adolescent hormones at work.

I could feel his need throbbing against my stomach, being delightfully stimulated by my body's movements. Marik was close, fast of course because of his inexperience, so I allowed myself to near the edge as well. It wasn't hard as his tight, virgin body was enough to get me off fast.

"Bakura!" That was the only warning I got as Marik literally exploded with pleasure beneath me. He tightened like a vice, simultaneously sending me over the edge with him. His body convulsed and I growled his name into his throat. Quite unwillingly, I dislike showing any attachment, but at this point I doubt it mattered. He wouldn't remember anything but the pleasure.

Coming down was hard for him, his body still spasming even as I held him. I rolled us over, positioning him on my chest. I threw a crisp hospital sheet over us and relaxed. Marik had already passed out on top of me. I smirked knowingly at his exhausted body and drifted off to sleep myself.

Somewhere in the basement of the hospital.

"My God…" Two stunned, female guards watched the scene finally wind down after nearly an hour of the two ravaging each other. The two guards looked at one another and a silent vow of secrecy passed between them. And they popped the recording tape out of the machine, turning of room 509's surveillance, and started researching how to make copies.