Disclaimer: I do not own The Count Cain Saga or Godchild; they all belong to Kaori Yuki.

Loving Light

Darkness…it's surrounding me again and I'm rooted to the spot…I can't run.

I don't know what to do…I'm too scared to move, afraid of making the wrong move and sealing my fate. Yet fate is always behind me…so is death, so darkness isn't anything different at all. Is it?

All I can see at the moment is darkness, nothing else. Where is he? I can't find him anywhere…did he leave? He couldn't have, because he swore to me that he wouldn't leave me alone.

I continue to run…looking for him…there isn't any light, hope, or warmth wherever I go. It's like I'm running in a maze of darkness and I can't escape, but I have to find him…I know that he's in here somewhere, looking for me or waiting for me to find him, and I won't stop until I do.

But as soon as I reach the middle of the maze, pure darkness engulfs me, I can't break free…and I am swallowed in darkness…

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Cain Hargreaves' body couldn't stop trembling, as he bolted up in bed from the nightmare that he had just had. He was the head of the Hargreaves family, was seventeen, had raven-black hair, and beautiful green eyes that had specks of gold in them. He was charismatic and young, but society saw him as a misfit.

"Riff," he called as he heard his bed room door open, there stood Riffael Raffit, he was 33 years old, had had silver/light blue hair and sparkling ocean blue eyes...he was Cain's butler.

"Yes, Lord Cain, is something wrong?" Riff asked as he walked over to his master.

"Did you have another nightmare?" Riff asked in concern, since Cain didn't answer for quite some time.

"Yes," he answered quietly as he pulled Riff closer to him as Riff wrapped his arms around Cain in a protective hug.

"What was it about?" Riff wondered as Cain looked up at him...fear was evident in Cain's eyes and Riff would do anything to make it go away.

Cain didn't know what to say to Riff...surely he couldn't tell him that the dream was about him and there was no way was Riff going to believe that at all. "The dream was about you," he finally blurted out without thinking.

"What do you mean Cain?" Riff asked...not knowing that he didn't use formalities, but Cain noticed and it surprised him.

"Um...Riff, you know that you just didn't use formalities," Cain stated as Riff stared.

"Yes, I know. Why Cain, is that a problem?" Riff asked quietly.

"No, not really," he answered...the nightmare was forgotten, for now...

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

That morning, Cain didn't think about catching up on sleep as he watched Riff start his duties around the estate. He hated to admit it, but it was fun to watch Riff...as weird as it sounded, since Riff was his amusement this morning. And Riff was helping him stay awake.

"What is it Cain?" Riff wondered as he set a breakfast tray down in front of his seventeen year old master.

"It's nothing Riff, but you are fun to watch in the morning you know," Cain answered in a bored voice as he started to eat.

"What is that supposed to mean Cain?" Riff asked curiously...since Cain could say the oddest things at well...anytime. Riff stared at Cain who was smiling like a very devilish angel, and he was slowly pulling Riff in.

"It means that you're my amusement," he replied whispering the answer in Riff's ear.

"Is that so?" Riff wondered as he took the empty tray once Cain was finished, but Cain followed him down the stairs to the kitchen. Riff didn't like this one bit, because the kitchen was empty, the maids weren't even present, and he was getting a little uncomfortable as Cain continued to stare at him.

"What's wrong Riff?" Cain asked in a seductive tone, leaning over him as he put the dishes away.

"It's nothing…really Cain, not something that you should worry about," he answered as Cain continued to stare at him with a worried look on his face.

It was starting to dawn on Riff that when he looked at Cain, he just didn't see him as the twelve year old boy that he used to look after or his seventeen year old master, because Cain meant more to him than that. To Riff, Cain was worth more than any material possession that he possessed and also more than his own life. He'd give up anything for him, and do anything Cain asked him to do, no matter how outrageous the task or request was.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Riff's behavior was starting worry Cain. Riff was acting weird...like he was avoiding him, unless he called for him or needed something for him to do. It was starting to get on his nerves while giving him stress. Who knew that worrying over your butler could give you stress?

He didn't know what to do whenever Riff was present in the room; it was like he was drawn to Riff...like darkness wanting light. Riff was his light, while he was trapped in pure darkness. Cain didn't know if Riff could see what he was doing to him, but it was okay, because as long as Riff was around, everything would be alright.

"Is something on your mind Cain?" Riff asked as Cain stared at him in a daze.

That snapped Cain out of his thoughts and back to reality. "No, not really," he answered. Except for some reason, I'm thinking about you, his inner thoughts argued, and Cain didn't know why, but for some reason, his thoughts were right.

"Oh, alright," Riff answered looking a little hurt as he rearranged some of the papers that Cain was looking at earlier into a neat pile.

"Why, is something on your mind Riff?" Cain asked in return causing Riff to look up at him, a little puzzled.

"Not really Cain, it's nothing, and you don't have to worry about me, I'm fine," he replied while he saw the worried look on Cain's face. But I am thinking about you, Riff's mind argued with his answer. There was no way that Cain was going to believe him if he said that. Really, was his life this complicated?

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Now, there was absolute silence between them as Mary Weather, Cain's 10 year old half-sister walked into the room. She had long blond hair; sparkling ocean blue eyes, a bubbly enthusiastic personality, and a cute face that could make others look her way. She wore a bright vivid red long sleeved dress with frills at the edges. It was one of the cute ones that made Mary look irresistible.

"What's going on here?" Mary asked as Riff made tea and Cain just looked like he was in a daze.

Her voice snapped Cain out of his reverie as Mary glared at him. "Nothing's going on Mary," he answered quietly as Riff poured him tea. They shared a knowing smile, which made her start getting suspicious.

"Oh, really, are you sure?" Mary persisted, which made Cain who was sipping his tea, almost spit it out. And Riff just froze right where he was standing. Mary knew that there was something brewing between her older brother and Riff and they just couldn't admit it. She sipped her tea…like nothing was wrong as the two other occupants in the room stared at her.

The three of them didn't say a thing once tea time was over. Mary went back upstairs to her room and started to read as Cain started to relax and Riff calmed down somewhat. Cain just stared at Riff as he got up out of his seat and walked to his study and Riff followed right behind him.

As Riff closed the door behind them, Cain turned to look at him and smiled. "It seems like we have something to talk about Cain," he stated as Cain sat down in his chair behind his desk, while Riff stood beside him waiting for Cain's answer.

"Yes, Riff, there are a few things that we have to talk about," Cain confirmed as Riff locked the door. This action made Cain look up at him and wonder if he should even tell Riff what was on his mind.

"Well, why don't you go first Cain," Riff encouraged as he walked back over to him.

Cain didn't know where to start. As Riff stared at him, he was starting to double guess himself and thinking of not even telling Riff what was bothering him. But as he looked up at Riff, his warm smile told him to continue and tell him what was on his mind, and Cain couldn't refuse.

"Riff, about the dream, can we talk about that first?" Cain wondered as Riff gave him a silent nod.

"What happened in that dream Cain?" Riff asked as Cain tried to find the right words in order to tell him.

Cain didn't answer for a few moments until Riff put a hand on his shoulder and that reassured him. "In that dream, Riff, I was surrounded by darkness and everywhere I turned, there wasn't any light, hope, or warmth. And I couldn't find you, since once I reached the middle of the maze, I was swallowed up by darkness," he explained as Riff held him in a protective hug once again.

"Now, what did you want to talk about?" Cain wondered as he buried his face in Riff's shoulder and wrapped his arms around his waist. That was when Riff carried Cain to the spare bed that he had in his study in case he stayed up late and didn't go back to his room to sleep.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Once Riff laid Cain on the bed, he replied, "I want to make a confession Cain," as he sat on the bed next to him.

"Oh, do tell," Cain persisted in a seductive voice as Riff smiled and held him close and Cain automatically wrapped his arms around Riff's waist again.

"I love you Cain," Riff answered whispering the words in his young lover's ear.

Cain smiled and replied, "I know that you do, and I love you as well Riff."

"How did you know?" Riff wondered as Cain absentmindedly ran his fingers through Riff's silky soft hair.

"It was the way you were avoiding me, that gave you away," Cain answered as he started to trail kisses down Riff's neck as he heard his lover moan in pleasure, he started to suck on Riff's collar bone, and once he was done, there was a light pink visible hickey. No one could see it unless they looked close enough or if they had really good eyes.

"Now, you belong to me forever," Cain claimed as Riff started to bite and suck on his earlobe, which was starting to send shivers of pleasure down Cain's spine. And Riff enjoyed watching his lover cling to him because of the pleasure that he was inducing.

"I always will be yours Cain, nothing will change that," Riff answered in agreement.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Mary meet them outside the study door as they walked out and she didn't look happy…for one, Cain and Riff had a feeling that they were in trouble…not a good thing and two…they both weren't going to hear the end of it from Mary.

"So, what happened while I was preoccupied upstairs?" She asked tapping her foot on the hard wood floor.

"Nothing happened Mary," Cain answered as Riff excused himself to check on something in the garden.

"Oh, really, then what's with the bite mark on your ear?" Mary questioned as she stared at her older brother and decided that she wouldn't let him leave until he gave her a reasonable answer…Cain knew that as well.

"It's nothing that you need to worry about Mary, really, it's just a scratch," he replied hoping that she would buy it, but he hated lying to her, but this was one of the times that he had to.

"Oh, alright then, I guess I'm just worrying too much," she answered as she walked back upstairs, but she didn't head back to her room, instead, she went to the library and started to read some books that she took off the shelf.

Cain went to find Riff, who was currently in the secluded part of the garden, where no on ever went to, well except them…when they had the time, it seemed that they didn't have time to spare in this part of the garden as of late, and it was filled with Riff's favorite flowers, which were snapdragons. Cain found him watering them as he walked up behind Riff; he stopped what he was doing and looked up at Cain.

"Did Mary let you off easy?" Riff asked as he put the watering can down.

"Yes, and that's because I told a little white lie," he answered as Riff laughed and squeezed his hand affectionately.

"Why did you?" Riff questioned as Cain suddenly knocked him to the ground and lay right on top of him.

"Since I couldn't tell her about what happened between you and me, but I think she already figured it out and is just waiting for us to tell her," he whispered so quietly that Riff could barely hear him.

Riff had a feeling that what Cain said was true, because Miss Mary did have a way of finding things out…and why did he feel like they were being watched for some reason? Wait, Miss Mary went to the library after she talked to Cain, and if she sat in a certain position by the window, she would clearly see the secluded part of the garden from there.

"Shit! Cain, I think Mary's watching us," he swore as Cain opened his eyes, he did fall asleep on Riff for a few moments…since Riff was a comfortable pillow.

"Come again?" Cain asked a little dazed.

"I said that I think Mary's watching us," he confirmed as Cain sat up and took this all in.

"Great, we're good as dead," Cain finally said as they both walked back to the house.

"It can't be that bad, can it?" Riff wondered as they walked upstairs to Cain's room.

"Maybe, it won't be, but you always can't tell with Mary sometimes," he answered as he opened the door to his room and sitting right on his bed was Mary Weather, happy as a clam for some reason only known by her.

"What are you doing here, Mary?" Cain asked as she got off his bed and gave him a tight hug.

"Nothing, it's just nice to know that my brother's happy," she answered as she walked out the door. Little did Cain know that Mary knew about his dirty little secret.

"What was that about?" Riff wondered as he locked the door to Cain's room and joined him on the king sized bed.

"I have no idea," he answered as Riff gave him a gentle kiss.

"So, what do you want to do now?" Riff asked as Cain started to unbutton his jacket, take off his tie, and unbutton his shirt. Riff didn't even think about stopping him, since he was enjoying what Cain was doing to him as his lover ran his hands over his exposed upper body, it was sending shivers down his spine.

"I just want to have a little fun," Cain answered as he continued inducing pleasure to Riff with kisses starting from his collar bone down to his chest.

"What type of 'fun' do you have in mind Cain?" Riff questioned as he started to unbutton Cain's shirt, threw it to the floor and started to trace the scars on his back.

"I have no idea. Do you have any suggestions Riff?" Cain wondered as Riff then started to run his fingers through Cain's silky raven black hair.

"No, not really," he answered as he saw Cain's eyes change to golden-amber.

"Are you sure that you don't have any ideas Cain?" Riff asked making sure. But he received a kiss as a response, and he knew that Cain did have an idea.

"What's your idea Cain?" Riff asked in a bored voice as he ran his fingers down Cain's exposed pale chest.

"Can't you guess?" He retorted in answer to Riff's question with his own.

"Maybe," he guessed as he closed the shades in Cain's room and they both dove under the covers.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

The next night, Cain was sent an invitation from Uncle Neil, his guardian, who was hosting a party. Since Mary couldn't come with, Cain sent her to stay with Aunt Katina. Of course, Riff came as well; the party was quite fun, so to speak, since Riff was there. But little did Cain know that Uncle Neil was keeping an eye on the both of them.

Once the party was over, they both got into the carriage and sat through the drive home and Cain was using Riff's shoulder as a pillow, since he was tired from the party. Riff didn't mind, because he liked watching Cain sleep. Cain had a peaceful expression on his face whenever he slept, that was the only time that Cain didn't look troubled by anything at all.

"Cain, we're here," Riff said as he shook his young master awake.

"Hm? Oh, okay," Cain answered as he finally realized that they were home. Riff helped him out of the carriage, since he was still a little unsteady from sitting down too long.

That night, instead of returning to his room, Riff stayed with Cain. For some reason, Riff had a feeling that Cain would need him tonight. And he was right, because for some reason, the nightmare that they had discussed came back.

Cain woke up again shaking,, which also woke up Riff. "Cain, did you have that same nightmare?" Riff asked as Cain leaned up against him.

"Yes," he answered quietly as he lay back down on the bed.

"It's okay Cain, I won't leave you" Riff said in a soothing voice as Cain buried his face in Riff's chest.

"Really, promise?" Cain wondered as he started to fall back to sleep.

"I promised you that a long time ago, and you know I never break my promises," he answered quietly, whispering the statement in Cain's ear.

"I love you Riff," Cain whispered as he snuggled closer to Riff.

"I love you too Cain," Riff whispered to Cain as he held him close.

If darkness was looking for light, he had already found it. Cain knew that he wasn't trapped in darkness anymore, but he loved Riff, his very own light.