Disclaimer: Own Mel and Toby and Cookie.

A/N- this story has given me a lot of trouble. Probably because I wanted it to be the very epitome of evil things Pietro can do to unsuspecting female friends. Hope it's up to the expectations people are having.

Mel became aware of an incessant noise, trilling somewhere outside of the grey fuzz of sleep. Swearing, Mel sat up in bed and fished clumsily about for the portable somewhere underneath the discarded clothing strewn about her room. Her hand hit something hard underneath a blue skirt.

"Hello?" her voice was still sleep fuzzed.

"Good morning slave girl!" a cheerful voice chirped from the other end, "this is your wake up call."


"Well, how rude," Pietro looked at the phone in surprise, then hit the re-dial button.

Ring ring. Ring ring. Ring rin -


"You know," Pietro began, "slave girls don't hang up o - "


Pietro slammed down the phone and folded his arms over his chest.

"Fine. She want's to play hard ball....."

Mel snuggled down in the sheets and yawned. Sleep was just enveloping her in it's warm, dark arms when...

"Oooff!" Mel felt the air rush out of her lungs as something sat down hard. Her now open eyes confirmed her suspicions.

"Good morning gorgeous," Pietro grinned down at Mel, as he sat on her stomach. He was still in his pyjamas. "I believe we made a deal now didn't we? Slave for a day? Well today's the day and if you try to back out I start to make a lot of noise, bringing dear ol' mom and dad in. Now what would they say to find their daughter in bed with a guy? Apart from, 'who is that handsome young devil?' "

"Can't the slave girl sleep a little longer?" Mel moaned, pulling the blankets over her head.

"Tsk tsk, been out partying have we? The Christmas season taken it's toll on you my dear Melanie? Well too bad. Slave for a day means I need you right now. So get up or the noise starts."

"I know," Mel smiled, "how about I give you the fingers and you get the fuck out of my room?"

For an answer Pietro bounced the bed and cried out, "give it to me good bitch! I need you now! Yes! Yes!"

"Shut up!" Mel yelped, clapping a hand over Pietro's mouth, "all right. I'm getting up. Just stop making the noise."

"I'm glad you see things my way," Pietro grinned.

"Good morning my minions!" Pietro grinned as he breezed into the kitchen of the Brotherhood house, Mel in tow.

"Oh goody," Toby growled, "just what I need. Another cheerful person around."

"No coffee?" Pietro asked Todd.

"None," the younger mutant answered.

"Hey!" Freddy objected as Mel sat down and swiped a piece of his toast.

"Well, I think I'll have pancakes Mel," Pietro said, placing his feet on the table.

"Feet off," Toby snapped, whacking them with a hand. Pietro scowled at Toby but he put his feet down.

"Yes master," Mel drawled sarcastically, "and will you be having pride with your ego will it just be as is?"

"Tut tut," Pietro wagged a finger, "we mustn't be cynical. Now get cooking."

Mel sighed and stood up, carding a hand through her blonde hair. "I should never have made this suggestion."

"No you shouldn't have," Toby commented as he inspected the fridge's contents in the desperate hope that there was some coffee in there somewhere.

"Hush Toby," Pietro gasped in mock horror, "do you want to frighten poor Mel? No, no, no! Hush your mouth. Now, if you're good, I might tell you where some coffee is."

Toby turned on Pietro. "You know where coffee is?"


"Tell me! Tell me or I'll make you wish you'd never been born!"

"Oh how very original," Pietro rolled his eyes, "mornings are not your strong point are they? I know you can come up with a better insult."

"Coffee," Toby said through gritted teeth, "where. Is. The. Coffee?"

"Top shelf, to the right.

"Thank you!" Toby cried in exasperation as he threw his arms heaven-ward, then rushed to the cupboards.

"Morning Lance," Pietro said cheerfully as Lance wandered into the kitchen and sat down as if it was all too much effort to stay standing.

"Does anyone have any coffee?" Lance moaned, "I don't know why, but my head hurts and I feel like my brain is having trouble explaining to my legs just how they used to work. Plus, there's a bad taste in my mouth."

"Ahh, yes. The sorrows of the drunk," Pietro said smiled, twirling his fork between slender fingers like a miniature baton.

"Drunk?" Lance asked.

"Ahh, coffee," Toby sighed, sinking his head slightly and half closing his eyes in bliss.

"Dunk as a skunk," Todd said between mouthfuls of cereal, "hey! That rhymes!"

"Very good Todd," Pietro clapped mockingly, "tomorrow we learn how to string lots of rhymes together to make something called a poem."

"Pancakes," Mel interrupted, slapping them down in front of Pietro.

"Very good," Pietro said. He paused as if waiting for something. "Well?"

"Well what?" Mel asked.

In answer Pietro waved the fork back and forth like a clock's pendulum.

"I am not feeding you the pancakes!" Mel snapped, "you are not a child. If you want someone to do it so bad ask Toby. I'm sure he is the only one here who would find it even slightly interesting."

"Ooh, my head," Lance moaned, resting his head on his arms.

"If you're not going to eat them," Freddy began.

"Back off!" Pietro snapped, slapping Freddy away at super-speed.

"Aww, come on Pietro. You've got so many."

"Oops. Where did they all go?" Pietro grinned up at Freddy innocently. His plate was empty, the speedster having shovelled them in at super-speed. The speedster's face changed slightly as the taste of the pancakes caught up with him.

Mel smiled, "oops. Guess I forgot to say I ain't much of a cook."

"WATER!" Pietro cried, leaping to his feet and making gagging noises, "must have water!" He rushed up to Toby and snatched the coffee out of his hand, downing the entire lot in one gulp. "Ahhhh," Pietro sighed.

"My coffee!" Toby cried in disbelief, as he looked at the empty space in his hands where the coffee had been before. He turned murderous eyes on Pietro. "Never. Take my coffee."

"Toby calm down," Pietro yelped as Toby advanced on him, "it was just coffee!"

"It was my coffee." The dark-haired mutant had backed Pietro into a corner.

"Uh, sorry?" Pietro tried.

"Sorry isn't good enough."

"Uh, I love you?" Pietro tried again.

"Pietro! How could you! You stole my coffee. And then you try to stop me by telling me you love me when I know for a fact you don't."

"Did it work?" Pietro asked hopefully.

"Shut up," Toby snapped, turning and stalking out of the kitchen.

"I'll feed Cookie," Todd interrupted the silence that had filled the room after Toby had left.

"This was a bad idea," Mel groaned from the kitchen, "a bad, bad idea."

"Well you made the offer," Pietro called from his seat in the lounge, "and I accepted. So deal with it slave girl."

"But this is degrading!" Mel moaned.

"Hurry up," Pietro clicked his fingers, "I'm thirsty."

"You're evil," Mel said, "and these heels are evil too! Could you get them any higher?"


"Why do I ask?"

"Less talk, more action," Pietro called.

"What've you don't to her?" Lance asked.

"You don't want to know," Toby said from his chair, where he was reading a magazine, Cookie on his lap.

"Nothing," Pietro said innocently, "I haven't done anything. Now come out slave girl or I'll elongate your time as my slave to two days."

Mel stepped out of the kitchen, a tray in one perfectly manicured hand. Her hair was pulled away from her face, and her normally natural look had disappeared. Mascara and black eyeliner defined her large almond shaped eyes in thick, shadowy tones. Rich red brown lipstick coated her lips. But this was all noted afterwards, for the thing that struck the two straight boys in the room was what she was wearing.

A black satin playboy bunny suit, complete with white bunny tail, ears and cuffs. Tiny silver cufflinks embedded with the playboy motif glinted at her wrists. A white collar with black bowtie was about her neck, and black heels accentuated her long shapely legs, clad in dark tights.

"My, my, my," Pietro grinned wolfishly, "aren't we looking sexy?"

"I hate this," Mel snapped.

"So would I," Toby said, one eyebrow raised as he looked Mel up and down.

"Oh come on," Pietro snorted, "I know you'd just love to dress up for me. Wouldn't you?" The speedster turned his angelic face in Toby's direction. "You'd love to hear me moan your name wouldn't you Toby?" Toby opened his mouth, then closed it again. "Thought so." Pietro turned away, triumphant. He spoke to Mel. "Well? I'm thirsty."

Mel arranged a smile and walked up to Pietro. She turned as she reached him, so that her tail pointed in his direction. She smiled coyly over her bare shoulder and said in a voice that was honey-sweet, "hello, I'm your bunny Melanie. I'll be your bunny for this evening. How may I serve you?"

"A drink of iced coffee please," Pietro smiled, "it's too early in the day for alcohol."

"Is that real silver?" Lance asked, reaching for one of the cufflinks on Mel's wrist.

"Uh uh ah," Mel shook a finger, "you aren't allowed to touch the bunnies."

"Unless you're me," Pietro grinned.

"Yes, unfortunately, if you happen to make stupid promises to the wrong kind of people you end up in my situation," Mel said. She turned back to Pietro, "will that be all Sir?"

"For now," Pietro waved her away.

"Roll up! Roll up! Kisses only one dollar! It's a bargain folks. Come and get a kiss from the lovely Melanie Albarn!"

"What are you doing Maximoff?" Scott asked as he stepped up to Pietro on the street.

"Wanna have a go Summers? She's quite lovely you know." Pietro grinned and held out a hand for the money.

"M-Mel!?!" Scott gasped, having spied Mel, changed out of her bunny outfit, who sat at a table looking incredibly pissed off, and bored at the same time.

"Out of my way Summers!" a gruff voice snarled. Duncan shoved the physically smaller boy aside and slapped down a handful of notes into Pietro's palm, "how much do I get for this?"

Pietro flicked through the notes, his smile growing bigger, "well, let's see; because you're Duncan, I'm gonna say, one kiss extra."

"ONE kiss extra!" Duncan snapped, "but there's $200 there!"

"And Mel isn't a whore," Pietro smiled nastily at Duncan, "so it's either, a) you take the only two kisses you'll ever get from Mel and pay the 200, or b) you take your money back and we wave good-bye whilst making jokes about how little manhood you actually have, behind your back. So; which will it be?"

Duncan growled in the back of his throat but he left the money in Pietro's hand and moved into the line that was forming in front of Mel.

Pietro grinned and stuck the money into his back pocket, "another day, another sucker."

"Well, look who it is," Pietro smiled as he and Mel walked down the street. Pietro was now $350 richer thanks to Mel's 'kisses for a buck,' and so far, things were just getting better and better for the New Yorker.

Mel looked up as Pietro spoke. "Who?"

"It's Tori." Pietro's smile got wider, "lets have some fun shall we?" Before Mel cold protest he dragged her off to one side before Tori could spot them.

"What are you going o do?" Mel hissed, "please Pietro, he's my boyfriend for Christ's sake. Don't bring him into this."

"No, I think I will," Pietro grinned, glancing in Tori's direction, "now, here's the plan......"

"Hey Mel," Tori smiled at his girlfriend, "I tried to call you this morning but you were out."

"I know," Mel sighed, carding a hand though her hair, "I had some stuff to deal with."

"Well, you're here now," Tori smiled, enveloping her in a hug and kissing her.

"I love you," Mel said after the kiss had finished.

"What?" Tori frowned, holding her at arms length.

Mel continued, a slight look of desperation on her face, "I love you and I want to marry you and have your children."

Tori took a quick step back. "Ahh Mel? You okay hon? Did you take something you shouldn't have?"

"Love is a drug," Mel said, her voice strained as if it was all too much effort what she was having to do.

"Ah, it sure is," Tori said uncertainly. He was already looking around for any sign of a Brotherhood member.

"Damn he's good," Pietro cursed as he watched the display from his seat, "he's already looking for one of us. Hmm, guess old Tori has got more intuition than I gave him credit for."

Meanwhile, Tori had managed to subdue Mel, who was babbling like a maniac about how she wanted to marry Tori and have his children.

Pietro crossed his arms over his chest and frowned. "Well that didn't go according to plan. Uh oh."

This last comment came because of the simple fact that Tori had just spotted the New Yorker over at the dinning table; and was now coming across, Mel in tow.

"Pietro," Tori said.

"On a first names basis now are we?" Pietro asked, cocking his head to one side and regarding Tori with his brilliant blue eyes.

"Yes," Tori said shortly, obviously wanting to skip this part of the conversation and steer towards more important topics.

"I don't ever remember giving you permission to call me Pietro," Pietro stated. He pronounced his name deliberately, accentuating the i and the e, and rolling the r softly. The way he said the name made Tori's attempt seem hallow and pathetic in comparison. He smiled in fake sincerity at Tori.

"What have you done to Mel?" Tori snapped shortly, "or more specifically, what have you given her?"

"Nothing," Pietro said, widening his eyes innocently, "if she said anything strange it would have been because she wanted to. Or felt she had to."

"Oh don't give me that bull shit. I know you had to have slipped her something."

"Actually, she's my slave for the day," Pietro grinned, rising slowly from his chair, "which means I can make her do anything I want."

"What?" Tori frowned in disbelief.

"Anything. I. Want," Pietro repeated.

"I don't believe you."

"Really? Okay. I don't care." Pietro glanced at his watch, "shit! Look at the time! Mel and I have to go now. Only 10 more hours of evil doing for me to catch up on. Tut ta." Pietro wiggled his fingers in Tori's direction and walked off, Mel quickly falling in step behind him.

"Why are we back here?" Mel asked. She sounded tired.

"Because I want to give you a complete wardrobe make over!" Pietro grinned, "now, let's have a look-see shall we?" He began to rummage through Mel's clothing. He picked up a mini skirt, and held it up for inspection. "Now Mel," he turned to the blonde, "what is wrong with this?"

"Ahhhh, it's not ironed?" Mel tried.

"Noooo," Pietro said, rolling his eyes.

"It's not expensive?"


"It's not, blah," Mel said, emphasising the 'blah' by flicking her fingers and saying it slowly and deliberately.

"No!" Pietro shouted, "nononononono!"

"Well what!?!" Mel yelled, "what is wrong with the god damn skirt!?!"

"It's pink," Pietro said, "and pink is an airhead colour. So," he threw the skirt over his shoulder, "we aren't going to be wearing it ever again."

"But - "

"No buts! I'm the master here."

"Fine," Mel folded her arms and pouted.

Pietro went back to rummaging. "Now, what about this top?" He held up a black tee shirt which said in white, 'I wish I was born rich instead of good looking.'

"It's conceited?"

"Yes, but that's not the problem."

"I don't know Pietro. Please enlighten me."

"You'd look better in it if it was a one shouldered piece." So saying the speedster whipped out a pair of scissors and cut the right arm off, extending the neck line down.

"My shirt!" Mel gasped, "you cut my shirt!"

"It's all for a good cause," Pietro said, holding the silver scissors to his chest and glancing upwards as if praying. "Now, back to work. Hmm, ugly. Out of fashion. Way too flowing for you. You got to show off those curves not hide em. Eww! Pink again. Ahh, what's this?" He held up a denim mini skirt which reached just above mid thigh. "Skank!" he commented throwing it away.

"Hey! That was my favourite skirt!"

"Ooh, this is cute. Meow, you would kill in this."

"That?" Mel gaped, "it's an 18th Century ball gown I used for Halloween!"

"Yes. Now put it on and then we'll go buy a sundae."

"In this," Mel cried.

"Yes. Now do it slave girl."

"Oh god."

"Hey there baby! Looking fine!"

"Grrrrr, you can come for a ride in my love machine any day Cinderella!"

"This is degrading!" Mel cried, "Pietro, how could you do this? Why are they wolf whistling?"

"Because you look like a Princess," Pietro smiled.

"Nice rack!" Someone yelled.

Mel turned and gave the guy the fingers. She turned back to Pietro. "Oh, I get it now. This dress is designed to push up and you knew it!" She glanced down, "god! Look at them! I might as well just shove them in someone's face!"

"Well, if you're giving me permission," Pietro grinned, his eyes flicked down.

"Get away!" Mel yelped, slapping at Pietro, "you sick perverted little boy! Away, away, away!"

Pietro ducked away easily. "Easy there Princess, we're not looking regal anymore. Oh look, here we are."

"Oh no," Mel moaned, putting her face in her hands.

"Tuntararatara!" Pietro made a trumpet noise and leapt to the side, "announcing her royal highness, the Queen of perfection and dainty damsel like qualities, and she's free folks, the Princess of Bayville, Melanie!"

Mel stepped into the ice-cream parlour, her head held high, muttering something along the lines of, "I can do this. Yes, I can. I am calm. Calm like the ocean. Calm like a gentle breeze. Calm as a, oh my god I am so not calm!"

"M'Lady," Pietro bowed low and pulled out a chair. He clicked his fingers at a pimple ridden teenage boy behind the counter. "A sundae worthy of a Queen my good man, for two."

"Uh, right away Pietro," the boy said.

"Do I know you?" Pietro frowned.

"No, but uh, I see you and you're gang around and I uh, I was hoping you were looking for new members."

Pietro smirked in amusement. "Really? Well, we'll see. It all depends on how fast and how well you make sundaes. It also depends on whether or not I have to pay."

"Oh right," the boy nodded enthusiastically, "don't you worry about a thing Sir!"

"My gang," Pietro smiled, turning to Mel, "I like the sound of that."

"I'm sure you do," Mel said.

"Uh, hi there Melanie." Mel turned, and found herself face to face with one of Duncan's drooling cronies. "What's up?"

Mel raised an eyebrow. "What's up? Oh how very mature. Allow me to make fun of your anatomy, 'howz it hanging dipshit?' "


"Bad choice of words," Pietro whispered into the jock's ear, "I'd leave before she starts to really lay into you." Duncan's friend nodded quickly, eyes wide. "Good dog," Pietro said, patting him on the head.

"Here's your sundae Mr. Pietro Sir."

"Thank you my good man, but I believe I asked for caramel topping."

"Yes Sir! Right on it!"

"Here you go."

"Hmmm, no, take it back, I've changed my mind, I want chocolate again."

"Your sundae."

"You imbecile! I said strawberry not chocolate!"

"Uh, Mr. Pietro, Sir, you said chocolate."

"I did not! How dare you question me!?! Get back to your ice-cream machine you idiot!"

"Here, you are, Sir. Strawberry topping."

"And where is the whipped cream? And the nuts? Get that pathetic thing out of my sight!"

"Right away Sir."

"Your sundae mistro. With whipped cream, strawberry topping and nuts."

"Any chance of a cherry?"

"Your sundae. With whipped cream, strawberry topping, a cherry and nuts."

"Thank you. You may go."

"Thank you Sir."

"Well that was fun wasn't it?" Pietro grinned as he balanced along the wall, Mel walking along side, her dress's skirts pulled high in frustration.

"I'm dead," Mel moaned, "I need to go find somewhere to lie down and sleep and sleep and sleep. But first I have to get this corset off. I can't breath properly."

Pietro glanced at his watch, "all right slave girl. You're free to go. I like today. It was fun. Let's do it again!"


- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Phew. That took my about 2 weeks to write! I can't believe it! Well it's done finally. I hope it lived up to people's expectations. ^_^