Author's Note: This will be a series of little missing scenes, mostly Jack and Sam related. Some of them will be light-hearted, others not. This whole little series was inspired by Urgo, when he made a comment that I found funny. I hope you all enjoy this!

Summary: "URGO! Shut. Up."

Disclaimer: Don't own it.


"You know, you were just thinking of that island Maui, with the big beaches and the little bikinis. That's where we should go, 'cause it's very nice and warm there… instead of being here."

Jack winced and closed his eyes as the words left Urgo's mouth. He would like very much just to land his fist to the side of his face… it was such a shame that he wasn't solid.

Sam turned around in her seat, a smile on her face as she looked at him. He stared back at her with a warning look on his face, and she turned back to the monitor, her shoulders shaking slightly with silent laughter.

"And I know that you like little bikinis," Urgo continued.

Jack made a slashing motion with his hand, but Urgo didn't take the hint. If he did, he was choosing to ignore it.

He looked at Sam. "And I know you like Sam…"

Jack slammed his fist into his forehead.

"So, naturally the combination of little bikinis and Sam would be a good one, right? You know, you've thought of Sam in a little bikini before?"

"Urgo…" Jack ground out through his teeth.

"On that dock in Minnesota where your cabin is. I have to say, Colonel, you have a very dirty mind."

Jack was making sure that he wasn't looking at Daniel and Teal'c. He had to remember that General Hammond, not to mention other numerous 'Gate techs, were still in the room.

Sam still had her gaze fixed on the monitor, but she was visibly shaking with laughter now. Daniel was out-right laughing, and Teal'c was even laughing, a deep rumbling noise in his chest.

"And then there was that time when the little bikini was left on the dock—"

"URGO! Shut. Up."

Sam had joined Daniel in out-right laughing now, as well. But she didn't completely hide her feelings. Her cheeks were burning bright red, no doubt from Urgo's little trip through Jack's mind.

Much to Jack's delight, however, Urgo started in on her as well.

"I wouldn't be laughing if I were you, Sam," he said seriously. "You have quite the dirty mind as well… what would your father say?"

Author's Note: Some of them are going to be relatively short, such as this one. If anyone has any specific scenes or episodes they would like me to do, just tell me. Thanks!