"You move and give me the seat, woman." "Or what? You'll bite me?" EmxB

Yeah, yeah, I know: Emmett and Rosalie are perfect for each other. But what if? Tell me what you think, my loves. Enjoy.


Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.


Chapter 1— Meeting


"Looks like your husband still doesn't have it, Rose!" I playfully wiped my fingernails on my shirt, grinning at Edward whose front was streaked with red. "Take it easy, kid." Jasper smirked at him.

"I thought I told you to stop calling me that," He snapped. "I'm older than you in at least one way."

"It was a lynx!" I said, disbelievingly. "I fight bears all the time."

"You lost your first one."

I shrugged good-naturedly, trying not to show how it bothered me. "I was careless. But not one since."

"Oh, come on, you two," Alice grumbled. "This is not a competition. Men."

"Honestly, Edward, I think I might have to start taking Emmett hunting instead." Rosalie grinned at me.

"Okay, that's enough," Edward muttered. "It's time for school; let's go, everyone." He took Rose's hand and they two of them started the sprint back to our cars parked at the edge of the wood. Alice, Jasper, and I followed.

"Let's take my care." Rosalie's eyes traveled to her glossy M3.

"No," Edward shook his head. "It's too pretentious."

"Let her take it," I chided him. "It's not everyday we get to race." She never argued with her husband, which baffled me. Rosalie was so fiesty when she first joined us, still fuming from the outrages of her human life. But then, she mated with Edward and he tamed her. "Besides, today's our first day. We have to make an impression."

Rosalie's smirk widened to match mine. We were the most impressive of our family and we took pride in it.

Edward narrowed his eyes as Rosalie, followed by Alice, went to the house to dress appropriately in order to match the brilliant crimson of the car. "I wish you'd stop making me out to be the bad guy all the time," Edward hissed as they were no longer in hearing distance.

"The bad guy?" I said incredulously. "Edward, you are the only guy." He scowled, glaring at the M3; I didn't have to be a telepath to see he was jealous , but of what? That Rose and I had such an easy, amiable relationship? That he had to share her with his family? "Kid, you can read my head, I'm not lying. It's you that she's married to. We might be close but she only thinks of me as a brother."

Jasper came to my defense. "He's right, Edward. Lay off, won't you? You're upsetting Alice." Edward snapped at the blond vampire who rolled his eyes petulantly. "Just last week, she caught you contemplating pushing Emmett off Goat's Rock Cliff."

Edward's eyes swiveled to take in my reaction.

I sighed. "The faster you realize, the better it will be for all us, kid. Grow up a little."

Rosalie pranced out, much too ostentatious for such a small town, but we were bound to draw eyes wherever we went. Perhaps a few extra glances all around wouldn't be bad.

Edward took her hand and pulled her in for a kiss, watching me closely, monitoring for a resentful edge to my thoughts.

I shrugged to let him know he was acting like a child.

"Oh, grow up, Edward!" Alice snapped.

"What?" He asked defensively.

"What are you trying to prove, Edward?" Alice asked crossly. "What was that show for? You are married to Rose. Not Emmett. He doesn't even think of her that way."

"You don't find her attractive?" He asked me skeptically.

"I never said that. Of course, Rose is great-looking -" she beamed "but she's my sister. You're my brother. Why do you not understand the simple logic at play here?"

"It's like you're being a monster on purpose," Alice joked, referring to his latest 'I'm-a-hellbound-monster spiel.

Jasper laughed. "But then again, Alice, what can you expect from selfish monsters like us, right?"

"It isn't funny, Alice."

Sharing at laugh at his expense, we set off for the high school.

Alice had timed it perfectly; our entrance at the school was nothing less than mind-blowing. It wasn't as if we needed to try to make an impression, but sometimes Sundance-ing it wasn't enough; we needed to go full Hollywood on this school.

A powerful gale was blowing as we zoomed into the parking lot. The low purr of the Saab drew heads and Rosalie's M3 caused double-takes all around. We shut off the engines simultaneously.

There was a moment of interlude, where the curiosity in the parking lot peaked.

The five of us emerged. We took a moment, the girls turning up their delicate noses at the lack of refinement, Edward and Jasper adjusting themselves around their women - I, the apparent bodyguard, glided a step behind them like a security detail to the President ready for an assassination attempt.

Rosalie was stunning, as she swept her blond hair from one side to the other.

Edward was clutching her hand childishly – he was obviously still thinking about our conversation, but his eyes blazed intensely.

Alice danced – she actually was dancing, to make sure that she came across with unearthly grace – in a fashion that would break a ballerina's heart.

Jasper, trying not to let anyone perceive the flood of emotions that he was being bombarded with, was dazzling with an angel's face that would chagrin Botticelli.

And I?

I was terrifying.


"Well, that was exciting," Alice whispered to us, as we regrouped once inside.

People were giving us a wide berth.

"This never becomes trite," Rose threw her head back and laughed.

A few of the boys actually stopped moving to watch her.

"It's like these people have never had vampires before...where is it cloudier?" Jasper wondered, shaking his head.

We went inside the main office and the bell above the door rang cheerfully to announce us. The receptionist looked up and back down to the notepad she was writing on, and then did a double take. Her mouth fell open and nearly hit the desk.

"Uhn…may I help you?" She asked, speaking directly to Edward. Rose, very conspicuously, snaked an arm around his waist. The receptionist blinked and looked to Rose and then away, obviously intimidated by her beauty.

"We're new here. Surnames Cullen and Hale; we need our schedules," Jasper said.

She turned to him, smiling in a rather perverse way – Edward winced – and nodded. "Of course. I'm Ms. Cope, the school secretary." Her eyebrows rose and I could easily imagine how raunchy her thoughts were as she riffled through papers, one eye still on Jasper.

Jasper leaned down, cupped Alice's face in his hand and kissed her. Ms. Cope looked taken aback. Alice's eyebrow arched, daring the woman to say something.

Noting that it was a lost cause, the randy secretary rifled through a stack of papers and handed us our schedules, "Hale, Rosalie...Hale, Jasper...Cullen, Alice...Cullen, Edward...Cullen, Emmett -"

She looked around for me, the idea of a partner-less Cullen engaging her wild imagination…at least until she laid eyes on me.

Her heart stuttered and skipped several beats, and she launched herself away from us in her rolly chair.

I've still got it.

"Emmett," she laughed nervously, her heart going a mile a minute. "I - I Didn't see you there…" She handed me my schedule with trembling fingers.

"Don't know how you could have missed," I replied cheerfully.


"So, where are we off to?" murmured Alice, her voice too high for the humans. "Jasper and I are off to P.E. Ooooh, I hope they don't force us to wear those repulsive shorts."

"I bet you could pull them off, darlin'," Jasper grinned at her. "Shall we?" He offered her an arm and they walked off to the gym.

"C'mon, Emmett. You and I have English." Rosalie said, eying my schedule sheet. Edward kissed her and set off for his own class. "And so it begins," Rose muttered. "I wish I could have stayed home with Esme this year. School is so tedious."

"It won't be that bad. I'll make it fun." I promised her.

"What did you have in mind?" She asked, a devious smile spreading across her face.

As far as high school requirement went, English was as tedious as it got.

Of course this provided an opportunity for me to make it far more interesting.

The classroom itself was on the ground floor, which meant that it had windows all along the east wall, so we needed to sit as far from the windows as possible, in the case of a sudden bout of sunshine.

When we entered, there were two boys sitting in the two seats farthest from both the teacher and the window.

This gave me my first idea.

I nodded meaningfully in their direction and Rose, tossing her hair over her shoulder, walked over to one of them – even when she didn't try, she appeared as though she was walking down a catwalk – and tapped him on the shoulder.

He brushed it off impatiently.

Rose's eyes glowed with anger and she tapped him again.

The boy behind him who could actually see Rosalie gaped at her.

His curiosity piqued, the first boy turned around and his eyes widened.

"Hi," Rose purred.

"Hello, beautiful," he returned in what he obviously thought was a smooth, suave tone. "How you doin'?"

"Not bad, until I saw you." She winked.

"I'm Tyler."


"Do you have a boyfriend?" He asked.

"Yes," She answered, holding back laughter at what was sure to be an awful attempt at flirting.

"Well, when you want a manfriend, call me." He grinned hugely.

I was doubled over in laughter.

"Do you mind if I could sit in your seat?" She asked, tilting her head.

The first boy looked delighted beyond words; he took his backpack off his lap and declared himself free. "Go ahead, blondie."

She tittered behind one perfectly manicured hand. "You're so silly. But, I want sit in your seat, not your lap."

He looked confused. "In my seat. In front of him?"

The boy who had first seen her looked ecstatic. "Yeah, split Tyler."

Tyler grudgingly left his seat and found another one on the other side of the room. The remaining boy introduced himself as Ben.

"Do you like manga?" Ben asked.

"Of course, there's just something so drawn out about them, don't you agree?"

"Exactly!" Ben said enthusiastically, so clearly enthralled that a woman was finally giving him the time of day he didn't even see me arrive.

"Hey bud," I growled, pitching my voice a tone lower. I nudged him, accidentally pitching him over his desk. He raised his head, his glasses askew, and cringed away from my hulking figure.

"You want to move?" I asked with a hint of a snarl.


"Excuse me?" I raised an arm that was as thick around as his neck and raised three fingers that were probably bigger than anything he was endowed with. He gazed at them, and gulped as he broke out in a cold sweat. "You've got til the count of three."

He was gone before I got to two.

Class passed fairly quickly: Tyler wouldn't be deterred by any number of scowls that Rosalie shot at him until I growled at him, snapping three pencils on my desk with my hand. I waited until he drew his eyes to mine and then pointed at the pencils, at him, to Rose, and then feigned a punch that would have cracked his cranium.

He spun around so fast that he teetered on his chair for a moment.


After class, Rose and I went our separate ways.

When I got math, again there was someone sitting in my ideal seat. Two actually and I'd rather have had a table to myself than a nosey or lusty partner. The only difference was these two were girls.

As I approached, one of the girls fled, telling her friend that they would talk after class.

"Excuse me?" I said gruffly.

Ben from the earlier class was sitting next the girl's friend. He watched me warily, as though expecting me to use the same tactics on this girl.

She picked her head up and eyed me, pushing mahogany hair out of her eyes. She was so pale; I would have thought she was one of us if I hadn't smelled her blood rushing through her veins.

She looked me up and down in what she obviously thought was a surreptitious fashion.

She met my eyes briefly and then she was all smiles. "Yes?" She asked sweetly.

"Can you move?" I asked, curtly.

"Why?" She asked.

"Because I said -" I stopped myself. I wasn't used to being questioned by humans. "I'd like to sit there."

She gestured to the empty seat next to her.

"I like to sit by myself," I said, frowning.

"So do I," She said slyly. "You're welcome to sit elsewhere." I sighed pointedly.

Why was this girl, whose neck I could snap with a flick of my wrist not frightened by my bulk and sinister demeanor? Had I lost my touch?

"Move, dammit!" I snarled.

Ben was watching us nervously, casting an eye out ever so often for the teacher.

She narrowed her eyes. "No need to be rude."

I leaned close to her until I could see myself reflecting in her eyes. "You move and give the seat, woman!" I wasn't about to let myself be bested.

She remained nonchalant, although her hands were shaking. "Or what? You'll bite me?"

I froze.

"This isn't first grade," She said, frowning at me. "And I don't have cooties."

Relief spread throughout me. I started laughing loudly.

She looked confused.

I laughed harder, leaning on the desk for support.

When I was done, I sat down next to her. "Point taken."

She smiled. "Bella."