A/N: Okay, I've seen this trend going on all around and deviantart, so I decided to give it a shot! Tell me what ya think and if someone requests it, I'll do another pairing when I have the time cause this was kind of fun.
Discalimer- I don't anything but my ideas!
Thnks Fr The Mmrs- Fall Out Boy (3:25)
Just before he left the cave known as headquarters for the last time, Hoshigaki Kisame thought back. He remebered all the people he had met during this phase of his life. He rembered all the friends he had made. Heh, Kakuzu was indeed a money-hungry bastard, but if you found him on a good day, he was quite the story-teller. He would speak of how things were when he was born (a good couple hundred years ago), all sorts if folk-tales that his mother used to tell him, all the fights he had been in before joining the Akatsuki... And, when it was only semes in the room, he would talk about his favorite ambition. Not making all the money in the world his own or anything, no, his one ambition had to deal with a cretain loud-mouth albino and a amethyst and diamond ring that Kakuzu always kept with him, waiting for the perfect day to show it to him. Waiting for so long and still never having the chance.
He was also good friends with Zetsu, both halves surprisingly, and would often accompany the schizophrenic man on hunting-trips around the base. On these trips, outisde of earshot of the base, Zetsu would ask Kisame almost constant questions about whether he sould continue his relationship with Tobi, what would Madara (1) say if he ever found out, and for the occaisional dating advice. Kisame laughs as he recalled how each half of Zetsu would ask questions in turn.
Sasori was an odd case. Sure, they were freinds, but Sasori always looked at Kisame as if he were one of those creepy puppets he would make. Ugh, just thinking about those things still gave Kisame the creeps. It wasn't that much better when, out of the blue, Sasori gave Kisame a present. ("I think you'll like it..." The red-head said with a smirk. Kisame highly doubted this but opened up the giant, coffin-shaped box anyway. His eyes widened as he screamed,
"Oh my G... AAH!" It was an almost-true-to-life puppet-version of himself staring up at him. Sasori frowned at the shark's screams,
"Whay are you screaming? It's beautiful and eternal. I just have to make sure that it has enough water-proof sealant to..." Kisame screamed,
"Why the hell do you think someone would want something like this?!" Sasori scoffed,
"I'll have you know that I've made ones of Kakuzu, Pein, and Konan, thank you very much!" Kisame was still a bit creeped out but he took the gift anyway with a shaky, 'Thank you'.)
Kisame was actually carrying the coffin-shaped box with him right now. "I can't exactly leave all his hard work behind, right?" He smirked. Hm... Pein. Pein hardly ever ventured far from his office but when he did, and it wasn't for business, he seemed to be quite the guys to hang out with. One time, since they all knew that Kakuzu would get a bit out of control if money was involved, they played a nice game of cards. (The ukes (Itachi, Deidara, Hidan, Tobi, and Konan) had walked in from their monthly night on the town just to be welcomed back with a strange sight. All the semes were sitting round a table, cards in hand and at least missing one article of clothing each. The ukes were all silent until Hidan shouted, "What the fuck? Did we just fucking walk into a game of strip-poker?!" It's silent before Kakuzu, missing only his shoes, replies,
"Yes, now shut up, we're trying to concentrate." The ukes all immediately sat, down, Tobi running into the kitchen and back to bring popcorn. No use in letting a good show go to waste, no? At the end of the next hand, Kakuzu stated, "Four Aces." He threw the cards onto the table as proof and called, "Sasori? The pants please?" The redhead, who had already lost a shirt and a sock, growled but nonetheless took of his pants.
"Yeah! Go Danna, take it off, un!" Deidara cheered from his seat. Sasori blushed but quickly sat back down. He still had his breifs and one sock, he was still in the game! By the end of the night, however, Sasori was the first to lose, surrendering before he had to take off his underwear, Kakuzu lost second, not even staying to take off his pants, then Zetsu, who sank into the ground from embarassment after losing his boxers to Kisame. It was now Kisame versus Pein, each clad only in their boxers and a final hand of cards was going to settle the game. Kisame looked over at Pein, who had a smile on his face, and smirked back. They both threw down their hands and everyone blushed and gasped. Pein had a Full House but if was beaten by Kisame's royal flush. Pein looked at the table with wide, gray eyes. Kisame tried his best not to laugh but it failed when he started laughing in that deep, hearty voice. Pein smirked and stated,
"So, you think this is funny, huh?" Kisame nodded, still laughing. "Well, I also have a sense of humor. As Akastuki Leader, I decree that upon losing a game of strip-poker, the Akatsuki Leader, me, shall not have to surrender his clothes, therefore technically not losing the game. The Akatsuki Leader has spoken!" All the other semes gaped at Pein's words and the auburn-haired man walked away, saying, "Come one, Konan, let's go to bed.")
Hidan, Deidara, and Tobi were awesome to hang around with... Except if they were about to get into the dreaded 'girl talk'-hour. Hidan seemed to like the shark part of Kisame and would always bring Kisame live animals and see if he would eat them in front of him. Kisame said no, of course. Deidara seemed to share Kisame's morbid sense of humor and told jokes that were just as. Tobi was sweet, if a bit paranoid for Itachi's well-being. Everytime Kisame and Itachi would go somewhere, the masked man always popped up with condoms, lube, and aspirin saying, "Make sure to practice safe-sex!" Itachi would then proceed to threaten Tobi for his stupid behavior and then all would be right with the world.
Kisame gasped. "Itachi..." The beautiful, pale-skinned angel with the silkiest, midnight hair that had ever been his pleasure to run his fingers through. The wonderfully-skilled angel of death when it came to the battlefield. The romanesque angel who would arch ever so beautifully and moan so sweetly when the two made love. Itachi... Who, on the day he left to become a true angel, left Kisame naught but a simple card on his pillow saying,
"Kisame, I love you. Thnks fr th mmrs,
Kisame also had that card with him now, as he stood outside the cave, having his last memories of that place. He finally took a deep breath before saying, "Good bye Akatsuki.", and walking away. He then thought to himself, "Good bye, Itachi. Thnks fr the mmrs, indeed."
Open Book- Gnarls Barkley (3:21)
During a silent, Valentine's Night, Kisame and Itachi were on their king-sized bed which had been made with red sheets especially for tonight. Kisame was kissing at Itachi's chest, leaving skin tingling wherever he went, just before he rose up and locked lips with the panting brunette. When they broke apart, Itachi looked at Kisame with those blood-red sharingan eyes. The slim brunette then whispered, "You're an open book, you realize that?" Kisame blinked before asking,
"How so?" Itachi rose up onto his elbows and said,
"People can see what you're feeling by looking at your face." Kisame scoffed.
"Really? Then how am I feeling right know?" Itachi looked then answered,
"Skeptic." Kisame smirked,
"Lucky guess." Itachi replied,
"Smug." Kisame laughed at Itachi's quick responses.
"Amused." The shark shook his head right before lowering his head to one of Itachi's nipples and licking it. Itachi closed his eyes and shuddered out.
"Aroused?" Kisame bit the risen nub right before replying,
"Very.", and moving to capture Itachi's lips in another kiss. However, just before the kiss connected...
"Baka-same! Me and Hun need another blanket!" Kisame gritted his teeth and growled. Itachi looked at his husband's face and stated,
"Very." The shark replied before he got up to go get his son and his friend another cover from the hallway closet.
Secret Life- Jerome Rebotier & Debra Reynolds (Code Lyoko ft. Subdigitals Soundtrack) (3:54)
Many people know about Akatsuki. The evil organization bent on world-domination by capturing and harnessing the power of the ten (2) bijuu. But how many people know about the other half of Akatsuki?
In one typical morning, you'll see Hidan, the immortal Jashinist preist, running down a hallway dripping with water, yelling his head off. Why? Well, if we take a closer look... "Jashin-damnit! Kiro, Kire, Kira!(3.1) Get your asses back here!!" Then, if we stroll down the hall, we can see three small children, around the age of five. Two small boys, one a little taller than the other with long, scraggly brown hair like his father, stitches running down from his face and from each side of his mouth. The other with two large stitches running across his face, and short brown, scraggly hair. The last child is a small girl who has taken the albino-gene from her mother, her skin flawless and pale, her eyes wide and lavender, her long white hair in two pig-tails streaming behind her as she ran. The children thought they had been able to avoid their albino 'mother' and were laughing at their victory. Until they tripped over a large black thread that neither of them had seen. They all groaned in slight pain before looking up to see the large form of their sitched up, brunette father. They all gulp and the girl, Kira, the youngest, giggles,
"H-Hi, Daddy-Fucker..." Kakuzu simply rolls his eyes and calls,
"Hidan, they're over here." The albino runs over and yells,
"What the hell are you guys doing?! Get the hell over here so I can give you kids your baths!" The triplets groan.
"Why do we have to take a bath?" Kiro, the second oldest boy, groans. Kiro, the oldest, states in a monotone,
"It's a waste of water, soap, and time. Why not just forgo it?" Hidan lifted up Kira and Kire, saying,
"Because I'm Daddy-Bitch and I say so, so march mister!" They all groan again as they are taken back to Kakuzu and Hidan's quarters. Kakuzu just chuckles softly and walks to the kitchen to prepare breakfast for his family.
Deidara walks into the Akatsuki's library one morning. It's after breakfast, so he knows that they'll be here. And sure enough, sitting alone at a table, reading a scroll is his son, Saso. The young four year-old with the aquamarine eyes and the blonde, blue tinted hair notices that he isn't alone and he looks up. "Oh. Hello Mother." He begins to read again. Deidara sighs.
"Saso... You're already so smart, you're ranked number two in Animeaus's (3.2) Smartest Children list, yeah. What could you possibly be studying now, un?" Saso read one more paragraph before asking,
"Mother, ano sa?"(4) Deidara replied,
"If a tree falls in a forest and there's no one around to hear it, does it make a sound, ano sa?"
"Un..." Deidara frowned as he thought for a while. Saso smirked at his mother's frustration causing Deidara to yell. "You little wise-ass, un! I'll see what your father(5) has to say about this, un!" Deidara rushed out of the library, leaving a chuckling Saso reading his scroll which read, 'How to Outsmart Your Common Blonde'.
Zetsu was out in the forest around the base, looking for something... or someone. "Where... Could she be?" Each side asked. There was a girlish giggle from near by, causing Zetsu to smirk. "Gee, I wonder... What that was?" Eachside said before they jumped in the bushes and caught who they were looking for. The green skinned, green and flower-haired, orange-eyed little girl who was his daughter. "Ongakuhana..." The dark-Zetsu started, "What are you doing out here?" The five year-old girl tried to talk but ended up coughing out some bloody feathers instead. "Cute." Both halves admitted. Just then, a voice asked,
"Zetsu! Have you found her yet?" Ongakuhana called,
"Mama!" When she heard Tobi's voice. Tobi ran up and Zetsu handed the girl off to him. "I caught three birds today, Mama!" Tobi nodded.
"Did you. Well that makes Ongakuhana a good girl, doesn't it?" Zetsu shook his head with a smile and the three walked back to the base together.
Konan was in her new baby girl, Maki's, nursery, and was right above the small, auburn-haired one year-old's crib. The blue-haired woman had a collection of toys and markers and was now teaching the girl simple words and colors. Konan held up a blue marker and cooed, "Now what color is the marker, Maki-chan?" The baby cooed and giggled,
"Red!" Konan's smile lowered a bit but she said,
"No, sweetie, the marker is..." She looked at the marker, which had changed color. "Hm, it is indeed red." Konan put down the marker and picked up an orange lion (Maki's father's gift to her). "Now what animal is this?" Maki cooed,
"Pink bunny!" Konan sighed,
"No, Maki, it's a.." Konan looked and she was now holding a pink bunny. She called over to Pein, who was doing some paperwork at his desk. "Pein! Tell your daughter to quit changing reality!" Pein glanced over and smiled,
"Konan, she's gifted. Let here have fun with it." Just then, Pein's hair turned a wonderful shade of violet. He frowned. "Okay, she needs training."
Mizuki Hoshigaki, five years of age with pale, almost gray, skin and bluish-black hair, was sitting on the living room couch of the base with his best friend Hun (6), watching the Animeaus news channel. Itachi walked passed the two, not before stopping and pointing to Hun, the boy with a black crescent under his left eye and dog-ears on top of a messy combination of blacks, oranges, and silver. "Mizuki. Get the dog of the couch." Mizuki glanced at Hun who whined but, nonetheless, got off the couch and sat on the floor.
Yes, who could possibly know about the secret life of the Akatsuki?
Kasane's Territory Forever- Teto Kasane (3:27)
It was Kisame Hoshigaki's thirty-ninth birthday and, despite the age number, there was an awesome party going on. At least until it was time for the shark to blow out the candles for his birthday cake. Just as Kisame took in a deep breath, his son, Mizuki, muttered loudly, "Baka-Misoji (7)-Same...", causing Kisame to choke. Everyone was silent before the shark growled and grabbed his five year-old son. He then bent Mizuki over his knee and proceeded to give him a sound spanking.
"How.. Many.. Times.. Do.. I.. Have.. To.. Tell.. You? Don't.. Call.. Me.. Misoji!!" He then Let Mizuki go, the boy now rubbing his smarting bottom. Kisame then blew out his candles, all of his friends and his wife cheering. Later on that night, when they had finished cleaning up, Itachi asked his husband,
"What did you wish for?" Kisame replied,
"Meh, I didn't make a wish. Didn't need it." Itachi gave his husband a questioning look before Kisame pulled him close to his chest and hugged him. Itachi almost sighed at the closeness until he felt Kisame grope him. He groaned but when he rose his gaze he saw Kisame smirk and say, "This is already my territory forever."
Eleanor Rigby- The Beatles (2:07)
On a joyously bright Sunday morning, Wedding-bells were ringing in the 1st Church of Konoha. Suddenly, the older in a black tuxedo, the younger in a frilly-white suit, Sasuke and Naruto Uchiha walked out of the church to a happy crowd of those who had been at the blessed union. In the front line of the crowd were Kisame and Itachi Hoshigaki, the later being the new groom's older brother. Itachi had been clapping silently for his brother until he saw his husband throwing rice at the newlyweds. "Kisame."
"Blessings to the newlyweds! Wait, Itachi, what is it?" The brunette kept clapping but whispered,
"Stop doing that." Kisame frowned and threw another handful,
"Stop doing what?"
"The rice. Stop throwing the rice." Kisame frowned and harshly whispered back,
"I can't believe this, we had to go thorugh hell and back in order to get Sasuke to come to our wedding and now that we're at his I can't wish my younger brother-in-law luck on his marriage?" Itachi turned to his husband and said,
"There's nothing wrong with you wishing them luck. I thank you for that."
"Then what is it?" Itachi hissed,
"Do you notice something, Kisame?" The shark looked around until he saw that no one else was throwing good-luck rice, they all threw confetti. "'It' is being the fact that no one throws rice at weddings anymore, Kisame!" Kisame threw another handful and asked back,
"Why the hell not? This is still a Kirigakuran tradition for me!" Itachi snapped back,
"Because birds eat it, swell up, and explode! Kisame!" Kisame scoffed,
"Please... That's just an urban-myth." Just then some birds flew down and started eating the rice that Kisame had thrown. "See, my little worrywart, they're fine!" Just then, there was a loud squack and all of the birds blew up with little 'pop' noises. Kisame and Itachi looked at the spectacle with widened eyes before Kisame smirked and called over to another wedding guest, "Hey Orochimaru... Want some rice?"(8) Itachi just shook his head.
2. (9) A pale hand picked up a grain of rice from the ground at the church he was standing at. The young pale, brunette teen sighed, "I guess I'll never have that." He tossed the rice back to the ground. "No use to live in a dream." Itachi Uchiha, sixteen years-old walked across the church yard all the way to the small bridge that they had. It was suspended over a river and Itachi intended to become very close friends with that river, very soon. He climbed up onto the bridge's rail and stood up there for a second, as if reflecting on something. Just before he jumped in a voice sang,
"Ah... Look at all the lonely people..." Then called over, "Hey there!" Itachi gasped and looked over. There was a startingly blue man standing on the other side of the bridge. He had dark-blue hair and strangely resembled a shark. The man called over again. "Whatcha doing up there?" Itachi steadied himself and yelled,
"Would you get out of here?!" The man smirked, sharp teeth showing.
"Nah, don't think I will. This church, ever since it was abandoned, is public property. You don't have to leave and neither do I!" Itachi groaned and turned back to the rushing water. The clouds above were thick, gray and roaring with thunder, affecting the water. "You know..." The man started again, this time much closer. He was right besides Itachi, looking into the river. Itachi gasped and almost fell into the water by accident. "Whoa! Hold on there!" The blue man exclaimed before grabbing Itcahi and bring him back onto the bridge. Itachi panted heavily. He had almost died just now! "You know, if you're going to jump," Itachi's eyes widened at the man's words; he sounded completely serious! "You should find a place with deeper water." He then turned to Itachi with a smile. "Like the River Mercy!" Itachi gave a perplexed look. The man continued, "Yes, the River Mercy... You know, I'd jump into there myself but," He looked up at the sky. "It looks like rain!" He laughed a bit at that. Itachi stood up and yelled.
"Look, just shut up, okay!!" Kisame still smiled but he stopped laughing. Itachi whispered, "I can't take it anymore..." Kisame frowned,
"Are my jokes that bad?" Itachi snapped back,
"Not you, you idiot! Everyday, every night, it hurts... I can't even look up at the sky without getting a migraine!!" Kisame nodded slowly. Itachi clutched at his hair, "I just want it to stop. My mom and dad took me to an eye-specialist and guess what they said?" Silence. "Heh, I have a rare type of eye-cancer that can only be treated with surgery. But the thing is that the chances of me surviving the surgery are so low that my parents won't even chance it." Itachi yelled, "They's rather me live and suffer than a small chance at me being comfortable! I can't stand it!!" Silence filled the church yard.
"So, you'd rather kill yourself?" Itachi slowly nodded. "Wow, Itachi, and everyone told me that you were a genius." Itachi glanced up at the man.
"How do you know my name?" The man seemed to ignore this question and asked,
"If I told you that with a lot of painstakingly-difficult negotiation, I had gotten your parents to reconsider, what would you say?" Itachi's blood-shot eyes were wide and on the verge of tearing. The man chuckled, "I'll take that as a yes." He held out his hand, "Now, come on. We've got to get you to the hospital!" Itachi gasped but slowly took the hand. As the two were walking, Itachi looked up at the man. He was... quite handsome up close like this.
"Wh... What's your name?" He asked. The man smirked again and stated,
"Kisame Hoshigaki, M.D. I'll be your doctor from now on, kid." Itachi nodded and walked closer to the tall man. He made him feel as if everything from the on out, no matter how hard it got, would be okay.
Koiji Romanesque- The Despair Girls (4:22)
Kisame walked into his and Itachi's quarters later that evening. When he got there, Kakuzu was just walking out. He gave a questioning look and asked, "Hey, what's up?" Kakuzu replied,
"Just dropping off some things." Before he walked off. Kisame was curious now and rushed into the room. When he was in, it was an odd sight. Itachi was in a red, silk robe, sititng on the bed sewing something. Kisame's eyes were wide but he walked closer, finally disturbing the focused Uchiha.
"Oh, Kisame!" He gasped, trying to put the sewing materials away. Kisame retorted,
"Wait, wait! Itachi, what are you doing?!"
"Like hell it is!" Kisame growled back. It was when the shark had finally succeeded in yanking away what the Uchiha was making that Kisame saw what it was. It was a small quilt , very small seeing as how Itachi had just started. Kisame stared at it with wide eyes until he slowly asked, "Itachi... What is this?" Itachi looked to the side and stayed silent for a while before saying,
"Sit down Kisame." The shark sat down and Itachi took back the quilt. The brunette ran his fingers over what he had done so far and started, "The blue thread is you..." Kisame looked at where Itachi had indeed sewn in some blue thread. "The black represents me..." He then stopped at a grey thread. Kisame looked at it and asked,
"Well?" Itachi stared at it, silent as the dead. He shakily brought a hand to his stomach and then asked,
"Kisame... what are your views on children?" The shark coughed before sputtering out,
"Well! I-- Um.. I.. Like them? I mean-- I always thought about having a family. Uh, I mean--!" Itachi sighed before saying,
"I went to the doctor today." Kisame's eyes went wide.
"No..." Itachi nodded.
"That's why Kakuzu gave me the thread, as a sort of 'congratualtion'-present. Kisame was still shocked.
"You're... pregnant?" Itachi nodded. He, however, wasn't expecting two strong arms wrapping around hims and a deep voice wooping.
"Yes! Go Itachi! You're pregnant! It is my kid, right?" Itachi strained out,
"Whoo! I'm going to be a dad!" Itachi was almost suffocating but he was internally ecstatic.
"He didn't reject me..."
Six years later...
"Baaka-same! Move over!" Mizuki Hoshigaki yelled. The four (Kisame, Itachi, Mizuki, and his friend Hun) were in Kisame and Itachi's bed due to the storm outside knocking out the electricity. Kisame shot up,
"Boy, if you call me that one more time..!" Itachi decided to intervene.
"Kisame. Just scoot over an inch." Kisame did so. Itachi then shoved Hun over to Kisame's side, saying, "I don't want my half of the bed smelling like dog! Mizuki come closer to me." Mizuki followed his mother's directions. "There. See, there's enough cover for all of us." Mizuki huffed as he pulled his portion of the blue, black, and gray quilt to himself.
"There would be more if the Baka-same would just get out of the bed..." Kisame growled back.
"This bed was mine before you were even a gleam in my eye(10) kid..." Itachi cleared his throat.
"Ahem." Everyone quieted down and looked at the Uchiha. "Now, if me and Kisame tell you guys the quilt-story, will you quiet down?" Mizuki and Hun nodded. "Good. Kisame, you can start." Kisame smirked and started,
"I'm the blue thread..."
Leekspin- Miku Hatsune (2:28)
One day, when it was Itachi's turn to make lunch for the children of the Akatsuki, he was in the process of getting the vegetables for the curry together when one of them fell from the basket. Being the uber-awesome ninja that he is, Itachi caught it and even twirled it in his hand before it fell to the ground. He looked at the vegetable in his hands and said, "A Leek?" He twirled it again and a smile grew on his face. He began humming a bouncy tune, still twirling the leek in his hand as he began to wash the othe vegetables. The kids were in awe at Itachi's Leek spinning skills.
"Itachi-san! That's sooo cool! Can you teach me?" Ongakuhana asked. Just then Kisame walked in and saw Itachi twirling the Leek.
"Itachi, what are you doing?" At that, Itachi stopped, catching the Leek almost effortlessly. He then smiled and asked,
"What, you've never seen a Leek spin?"
Schadenfraude- Avenue Q (3:07)
One day, Itachi decided to take Mizuki and Hun to the park. While they were playing, Itachi noticed that Lee and Sakura had brought their daughter here today too. He brushed it off and sat on a bench, pulling out a novel.
A while later, a small girl's crying interrupted the serenity of the park. Itachi looked up just to see that Lee and Sakura's girl was on the ground crying her eyes out, a spilt ice-cream cone in front of her. Itachi then saw Mizuki and Hun laughing at her as they ate their ice-creams. Itachi walked over and pulled both of them away. He then scolded them, "What did I tell you kids about laughing at other people's suffering?" Mizuki responded,
"Not to..." Itachi glared at his son. "..Unless you're the one who caused it." Itachi nodded.
"That's right because when you do it's called..?" Hun answered this time,
"Schadenfraude!" Itachi rolled his hand in the air,
"Um... It's German for 'Happiness at the misfortune of others'!" Itachi asked,
"And did you cause it?" The two boys nodded. Itachi smiled.
"Good. Now, let's go home." The three walked home, Itachi glowing in the fact that such an important lesson had been learned.
Blind Mary- Gnarls Barkley (3:25)
Itachi was walking around the Akatsuki base one day and he sucessfully ran into the corner of a wall. "Itachi? Are you okay, un?" Itachi rubbed his head.
"Yeah, I'm fine. Thanks for asking. He walked away from Deidara and tried to find his way to the living room. He then tripped over one of Saso's scrolls. The blonde boy sighed,
"You really should put them on." Itachi growled underneath his breath. He carefully and slowly walked into the kitchen. Before he knew it, he walked into the wooden-cabinet that Kakuzu had opened. Kakuzu looked and said,
"All this crashing is becoming a liablity, Itachi." Itachi sighed and stated,
"I just need... a glass of water." Itachi made it to the cabinet where all the glasses were held and opened it, trying to find a cup. He knocked over three, the shattering ringing throughout the kitchen before he grabbed one and said, "There! Not too bad, right?" Kakuzu sighed and said,
"I won't even dignify that with a response." Itachi rolled his eyes and turned towards where he thought the refridgerator was, just to bump into a large form. He squinted his eyes and saw that it was Kisame. The shark looked at his lover and sighed, bringing out a small box,
"Please... Put them on Itachi." Itachi groaned,
"But they make me look dowdy..!" Kisame pushed the box into his arms and Itachi took out a black pair of glasses. He put them and sighed, "How do I look?" He was answered with Kakuzu and Kisame holding back snickers.
"They.. look.. fine..!" Kisame choked out. Kakuzu added,
"Wonderfully sophisticated!" Just then, Hidan walked into the kitchen, just back from a mission.
"Whoo, that was something! I could go for a nice..." His eyes landed on Itachi. "Pft... BWAHAHAHAHA!!! Hey there, Ms. Librarian, I need a book on how you guys looked in the 80s! HAHAHA! Oh, oh! Or maybe, how to look when you don't want to get laid! Or maybe..!" Hidan didn't even get to finish before a glass made contact with his face.
Super Mario Hyadain- Mario, Bowser, and Princess Peach (Japanese side) (2:23)
Kisame- Hey there, Snake-bastard! You're such a creepy pedophile! Why don't you give up on Itachi already?!
Orochimaru- Well I regret to inform you that that's impossible, I'm his destiny, you can be sure of that!
Deidara- Un un!
Itachi- Would the two of you please stop it! Haven't either of you looked in a mirror?
Kisame and Orochimaru- Oh, now Itachi, you don't have to say such things! Cause semes always fight with their hearts!!
Kisame- Nice job!
Orochimaru- Hey, nice job!
Orochimaru- So, how are things going?
Kisame- Fine, fine. Mizuki's growing up like a weed and his fighting-skills are too.
Orochimaru- Aw, isn't that nice? No time to slow down!
Kisame- Oh, shut up, Orochimaru. Look, the second verse is starting.
Orochimaru- My sweetest weasel-boy, I am so much in love with you, (lecherous grin) and if you do not get that I will tie you up again!
Hidan- Hell yes!!
Kisame- And I will steal you back, risking my very life. (hangs head in depression) But I just cannot steal away your heart...
Tobi- Poor thing!
Itachi- Would the two of you please stop it! Are either of you listening to me at all?
Kisame and Orochimaru- Ah, The Tsundere in you is charming, too! But semes always fight with their hearts!
(Flashing back to various love-scenes between Kisame and Itachi and then Itachi shooing Orochimaru's attempts at trying to seduce him)
(Dun dun dun da dun dun!)
Kakuzu- (looks to the side) Who's there?
Sasuke- Hold on! Don't you guys think that you are forgetting about somebody here?
SA-SU-KE enters the stage! Thank you for waiting!
Kisame- (pissed off) H-H-Hold on! Wait a second!
Orochimaru- KY.. KY.. Don't you get the situation here?!
Kisame- If you don't stop fooling around, I'll really kick your ass!!
Sasuke- Oh man...
Itachi- I already have more than enough to deal with here... Foolish younger brother, don't you have a blonde to molest somewhere?
Kisame and Orochimaru- By looks we'd probably land in the lowest-class...
Kisame- But semes always fight with their..!
Orochimaru- Semes always fight with their..!
Itachi- Next time, why don't you fight with your faces?
(song ends here, the following is the dialogue that follows)
Orochimaru- Okay! Now that that's over with, Itachi, why don't we go see Konoha's swinging night-life?
Itachi- Sorry, I already have a date with my husband. (In a dazzling evening-gown, holding Kisame's arm, Kisame smirking all the while)
Orochimaru- What?! NO! Why?!!
Konan- Go Itachi!
(1) I had to keep Tobi and Madara as seperate people. I love Tobi as the idiot not as the evil psychopath that caused Itachi's death. Waah!
(2) I go by true-to-life mythology, not Kishimoto's nine.
(3.1) Some one around had an m-preg fic and Kakuzu and Hidan's kids were named this. I'm sorry for using their names but it was too cute and it fit too well. At least I didn't steal their descriptions.
(3.2) Animeaus is my name for the world in which all anime characters live and interact with each other. It was in a major AU that I did a while back. If anyone wants to see it, let me know and I'll put it up on my y!gallery account.
(4) Deidara says 'hm' and 'yeah' at the ends of his sentences, Saso says 'ano sa', which means 'hey, you know'. I thought it was cute.
(5) Note to anyone who will read my AU (anyone who tells me and wants to see it) Saso isn't really Sasori's kid *le gasp*. Whose kid is he? Well, I'd love to tell you but I have to 'Protect the world from devastation'! Hint hint.
(6) I'm a big fan of the Pokemon Gijinka Project. Hun (another character in my AU) is a gijinka of a Houndour. Gijinkas are very abundant in Animeaus so no one thinks much of it. Except for Itachi's common statements of calling and treating him like a common dog.
(7) Anyone here who knows about the awesome music-program Vocaloid? Well, then you'll know about the UTAU Teto Kasane (I have her program but it's all in kanji so I can't use it, TT. In her most popular song, "Kasane's Territory Forever", there's a part where she cries, "Don't call me Misoji!" Because she's technically thirty-one and 'Misoji' is Japanese slang for 'anyone in their thirties'.
(8) On The Simpsons they had two episodes that dealt with this.
(9) The Beatle's Yellow Submarine... Awesome movie. The "Eleanor Rigby" drabble is a tribute to it. Those who have seen that movie will notice some of the humor.
(10) Has anyone's parents said the saying, "Before you were twinkle in your dad's eye"? Well, if not, there's an episode of Family Guy about it...
Here are the rules if anyone else wants to try. I think may have broken #3 a bit.
DA Music Meme For Writers
1. Pick a character, fandom, pairing, friendship, whatever.
2. Put on your music program on shuffle/random and start playing songs.
3. For each song, write something inspired by the song related to the theme you chose earlier. You only have the song length. No pre-planning and no writing after the song is over. No skipping songs either.
4. Do 10 songs and post. Make sure to include the song name/artist.