Author's Note: I wrote this one-shot on a dare from a friend who said that any lemons between Jacob and Bella would be gross. This is the first thing I've published, so I would LOVE reviews, especially anything constructive on how I can improve. :)
I Favor Fire
"From what I've tasted of desire
I hold with those that favor fire"
Robert Frost, from Fire and Ice
I was dozing, in that strange state where you can't quite tell whether you're awake or asleep, when I heard Bella whimper a little next to me. She's dreaming, I realized, thankful that she was finally warm enough to get some rest, happy that it was one of the few things I could give her that her bloodsucker boyfriend couldn't. I hated that he was the one she wanted so desperately. Hated that he was the one that made her heart beat quicker. Hated that he was the one who would ultimately silence that heart forever.
My thoughts were dragged away from that fruitless path by Bella again. This time, she breathed out a sigh so sad that I couldn't stop my arms from pulling her closer to my chest. I buried my face in her hair and whispered, "Don't worry, sweetheart, nothing will hurt you while I'm here." Feeling her soft brown curls all about my face was a little bit of heaven. Then she wrapped her arms more tightly around my neck, leaning into me with a stretch that blurred the lines between pleasure and torture. Damn, how I loved this girl.
"Jake?" she mumbled, rubbing a bleary eye with the base of her palm. She looked at me then, her forehead wrinkled with an emotion I couldn't pin down. Sadness? No, not completely although that seemed to be part of it.
"What is it, baby?" I could smell that Edward wasn't here in the tent right now, although his stink was strong enough that he must have left recently. It was nice to be able to call her "baby" without him growling and ruining the moment by making her feel guilty. It was nice to be the one who she was curled up around, after a bad dream.
She twisted her head around to peek out from the sleeping bag we were sharing to see for herself that he wasn't here. Her face relaxed a bit then and it hit me, she had been feeling guilty. Why, though? She turned back to me and rested her cheek on my shoulder, sighing again, half-sad, half-longing.
"Bella? What's wrong, sweetheart? Bad dreams?" I could feel her grimace against my chest and then I felt her cheeks get slightly warmer. She was blushing? What on earth had she been dreaming about?
"Not bad dreams, exactly…" she hedged. I couldn't help but smirk. She had been dreaming about me. Somehow I just knew it. If it had been that leech she wouldn't have felt guilty about it, wouldn't have looked around to see if he had somehow been able to tell what was going on in her dreams. I snaked my hand under her chin and tilted her face up so I could look at her.
"What, dreaming about me again?" I couldn't help but tease her. Yeah, I knew she was never going to choose me over him, but that didn't mean I was above wanting her to admit that she still did want me. Somewhere, some place of her heart belonged to me; even if she wasn't willing to face it herself. I expected her to whack my chest or roll her eyes or do any of the dozens of things she did to subtly put me back in my place. What I didn't expect was that instead she'd turn her eyes to mine with a look so full of helpless hunger that they easily mirrored my own.
"Oh, Jake," she whispered, "sometimes I just wish…" her voice trailed off.
"What, baby?" My heart squeezed tightly in my chest. "What is it you want? You know there's nothing I wouldn't do for you." It was true. Here I was, acting as a de facto space heater, so she could stay with her icebox boyfriend while his bloodsucking family waited to fight off the crazy vampire army coming down from Seattle.
I should be with my pack, getting ready for the fight, running patrol in case Victoria's newborns came earlier than the little psychic leech foresaw, but no, I was here, torturing myself by jamming my body next to Bella's in a sleeping bag meant for one. I was a glutton for punishment. But when she looked at me like this, like I had something she needed, something only I could give her, there was no way I could say, "No," no matter what it was.
"I just wish it wasn't so hard." She closed her eyes and leaned her forehead back down against my chest.
"Bella," I murmured against her hair, but she didn't look up. I said her name again softly and she just gave her head a little shake. There was no way I was going to let this moment go, not when she clearly wanted something, possibly something I'd be more than happy to give her.
I cupped her face in my hands, gently lifting it. She kept her eyes closed, but when I stroked her jaw with my thumbs, her face softened and her lips opened with a small sigh. Then her tongue peeked out and licked her lips hesitantly.
I leaned in and whispered, "Is this what you want?" as I brushed her lips softly with mine. And unlike last time, she didn't tense up as her mind tried to tell her body it was wrong for wanting what it wanted. This time, she leaned into me, quietly moaning, and pressed her body more fully against my own. Hell, yes!
I kissed her more fully, pouring every ounce of passion into what was most likely my only chance to be with her like this. I opened her mouth with my tongue, groaning when her own tongue quickly pressed against mine. It was better than I had ever imagined. She was so soft and sweet and it just felt so good because she really wanted me.
My hands were running up and down her body before I even realized it. I quickly plunged them back into her hair before I got too carried away, but she groaned and pushed herself against me in protest, running her hands over my back and shoulders, telling me with her hands that she wanted this too. Thrilled, I tentatively inched my hands past her shoulders and down her back, pulling her close to me. I kept my hands over her shirt, but I did feel the skin of her back, satiny smooth, as I reversed directions and skimmed upward again.
For a while we stayed like that, holding each other close, reveling in the closeness of our bodies. But it wasn't enough. I wanted more. I wanted to get closer, feel her skin against mine, her moan as I kissed her throat, her collar bones, her breasts. But the sleeping bag, that I had been so thankful for earlier, forcing our bodies so tightly together, had become a hindrance.
She was running her hands all over my body and I was losing the ability to think clearly and so when I shrugged my shoulders, trying to stretch it out to get more maneuvering room, the sleeping bag split wide open. My brain was too clouded with passion to think about how we were going to explain that later, I just took advantage of the extra room.
I glided my hands back down to her waist and ran them up under her shirt, groaning into her mouth as I felt the soft undersides of her breasts. She moaned back as I ran my hands up, cupping them, her head falling back as my thumbs grazed her nipples. Impatiently, she reached between us and tore her shirt up over her head. I lowered my mouth to her breasts, sucking the pebble hard flesh into my mouth.
She cried out as I licked it hard, whimpering as my tongue continued to brush her nipple then flick it harshly. When I took it between my teeth gently, she screamed my name and wrapped her legs around my waist, pressing tightly against me. I rocked back into her, reveling in the heat I could feel welling between her legs, reveling in the fact that it was my name she was calling out in the throes of passion.
I continued to descend down her torso, licking her ribs, nibbling my way down to her belly button and beyond. When she realized where I was headed, she began pulling at my hair, as if to stop me, but, honestly, after having a taste of her mouth, there was no way I was going to pass up my chance to taste her very essence. Not unless she specifically said, "No." And while her hands in my hair were saying, "No," her hips were bucking up against me in a pretty convincing, "Yes!"
I worked the button on her jeans with a simple flick of my thumb and swept the denim down over her hips as if it were mere silk. It took all my restraint not to just rip her jeans off her. I could smell her, even through her sweet, white, cotton panties by this point and I was near insane with lust. She smelled incredible…tart like apples, sweet like cream. With a smell like that, there was no way I wasn't going to taste her.
I pushed her jeans all the way off, reaching up to pull her panties off with them. Her hands left my hair to cover herself, but I just batted her hands away, hitching her leg up over my shoulder so that my face was almost buried between her legs. I took one last breath of her intoxicating scent in before I let my tongue tentatively explore her.
I'd never done this before and I so very much did not want to screw this up, but that one lick completely undid me. God, she tasted so good. My tongue dipped deeper and more forcefully into her wet flesh and her hands returned to my hair, but this time she was holding me down into her body instead of trying to pull me away. This was heaven. Bella's wet flesh pulsating underneath my tongue, her scent and taste smeared all across my face, her voice, roughened with passion begging me for release. Yes, this was the only heaven I ever wanted to go to.
Slowly, I slid my tongue deep inside her, tasting as much of her as I could. I did that again, but when my tongue swept upward, licking a small nub of flesh which I quickly discovered was her clit, her hips bucked hard into my face and she called out my name again desperately. Clearly, she preferred my licking her clit, so I focused my tongue there, causing her to writhe beneath me as I slid a finger inside her.
She was so hot and so very tight. And when she moaned at the intrusion of my finger I could feel how her muscles tightened around me. I almost lost it right there. I continued to move my finger inside her pressing upward and licking her clit relentlessly, knowing by her breathy moans that I was doing something right. When I added another finger and her hips bucked again I could tell she was close. So I licked her clit one more time, slow and hard, and shoved my fingers deep inside her and she exploded.
I lifted my face to watch her cum, her head thrown back, her shoulders arching off the ground showing her breasts off to perfection. I watched her drift back down, deliriously sated and realized this was something her perfect popsicle boyfriend couldn't give her but clearly I could: warm, glowing orgasms. I crawled back up to face her, wrapping her supple and boneless body in my arms. She looked at me, smiled and then did the most erotic thing: she placed her hand on my cheek to hold me still and licked her own cum off my lips. I sucked in a breath and whispered, "God damn, Bella!"
Unable to fathom the very un-Bella-ish, passionate response I was getting from her, I buried my face in her hair, telling her again how desperately I loved her, how much I wanted this moment to last forever. And because life is unfair, the next thing I knew was Bella was no longer in my arms and I had been dumped out of the sleeping back as I yelled, "Hey!"
Instinctively, I flinched away from the cold floor and rolled onto something warm and soft. Bella. I was able to see her surprised and breathless face before I flew off of her again and was slammed into the tent pole.
The cold of the floor and the jolt of the tent pole awoke me to two crucial truths. First, Edward was in the tent and Bella was no longer in my arms. Second, Bella was fully clothed and in no way the satiated siren of a few minutes before. Which only meant one thing, I had just had a spectacularly erotic, but woefully unreal, dream and I'd be willing to bet that the leech had heard every bit of it.