A/N: alright since I am in needing of a writing release I have decided to write what is in my head at this current moment. So I just hope you like this but if you don't then don't read it.

Disclaimer: I do not own.


Bella POV

Anger, Rage, Pain and suffering is all I feel. It has all I ever felt when my ex-fiancé left me for my oh-so-called best friend and sister. It has been fifty years since the incident and 50 years since I was changed by Victoria. I was tortured, broken, raped and changed because of the bastard, who claimed to 'love' me, but oh boy was I wrong and over the past fifty years of suffering, war and destruction I have gotten the name Angelus Mortis meaning Angel of death.

My name is no longer Isabella Marie Swan; she was weak, fragile, clumsy, selfless and innocent.

I am now Belle Whitlock. Yes you heard me right; I took the name of jasper in his honour from when he was in war, the cold heartless monster he once was. The day I found out about Alice and Edward was the day I was changed and ran away.

Flashback,

It has been a week since I have been engaged to my own personal Adonis and nothing could go wrong, the whole family went hunting today as on Alice and Edwards request and I am seriously bored. I have cleaned the house and done my homework, and then an idea popped into my head. Esme said that I was welcome over anytime I wanted and to just let myself in, so I decided to go and wait till everyone arrived home.

When I got to the long familiar driveway to the Cullen household I got a really bad feeling in the pit of my stomach that told me to turn around and run, but something kept pulling me towards the house, curiosity? I have no clue but I kept going until I saw Alice's Porsche and Edwards Volvo.

Didn't they say they where going hunting? I frowned as my truck came to a stop, without the deafening roar of my engine I could hear loud music coming from the house which made the feeling worse.

Maybe Emmett and Rosalie decided to come have some fun? I suppressed a laugh and walked to the stairs leading up to Edward's room, I was confused when I heard the music coming from his room. It was something Alice and Jasper listen too when they are… oh god in Edward's room gross…

"Oh… Edward… don't stop" wait what Edward?

"Oh Alice." ALICE??? I walked to the door which was half opened and felt the rage and heartbreak poor over me, there in ou... His bed was a naked Alice on a very naked Edward.

I frowned and walked back downstairs to Esme's office, it was the only safe place I knew where they wouldn't look. I took out a sheet of paper and scribbled a note.

Dear Cullen's,

I am sorry to say that I have recently discovered some disturbing news that it broke my heart and destroyed what was left to me, I am truly sorry and hopefully one day in the future I will see you again.

Carlisle, you were like a father figure to me. Someone who I could look up to and I couldn't help but smile at the thought of how lucky I was to have someone as kind and compassionate like you as a father. I will always keep you close to my heart as I will Esme.

Esme, you were like a mother to me in every way but blood. I am sorry to leave you like this and for the loss of another child and for that I am truly sorry, but what I will tell you later in this letter you will understand, I will always love you too Esme.

Emmett, ah Emmett my big teddy bear of a brother, you could bring a smile to my face whenever I was feeling sad and broken, for that I will always love you big brother and don't let yourself get to upset and angry about what has happened. Please promise me that you will keep yourself, rose, Esme, Carlisle and jasper safe for me. I love you emmie-bear.

Rosalie, I forgive you. I know that you could seem like a heartless bitch but I can see past that and deep down I know you suffer from something horrible and I'm sorry, I wish I could of gotten to know you as much as I wanted to, you will always be the beautiful big sister I have ever wanted. I love you rose, don't ever doubt that

Jasper, for this I am sorry. I know ever since my 18th it has been hard for you but please forgive and let go, I know this will hurt you deeply and for that knowledge I am sorry. I am not the brave little human you make me out to be I am the coward today. Please jasper be the soldier I know you are and be brave, I love you jazz and I am sorry.

Now for the news as to why you are reading this and discovered my crest, I have forever left the Cullen clan. I wish not to be around the two people who did this and I could never break apart the family again.

Today while you where out hunting I came over with a feeling of dread, I heard music coming from Edward's room. The music I know quite clear that it was Alice and Jaspers, that's when I heard a moan but it wasn't Jaspers name it was Edwards and if you found this note Esme that means they haven't realised I saw them together in bed. Goodbye my family I love you all but the cheaters.

With love your dearest

Bella.

I took off my crest and left it there on the note, I could still hear the two making love and ran far away without tripping to the deepest part of the forest. That's when Victoria took me to hell…

End.

I moved to Texas after that and became a fighting soldier the bringer of death to those who try and defeat me and hurt the innocent, but deep down I'll always be that fragile little human who was in love.

Carlisle POV (the day Bella left)

"Awe common pops, let's wrestle for a change." Emmett yelled and I couldn't help but chuckle, I got down into a playful crouch when my wife, Rosalie and jasper came out of the trees looking quite panicked.

"Carlisle something is wrong."

"What's wrong jasper? What happened?" I asked franticly, I looked quickly around and noticed Edward and Alice were missing.

"I was in mid hunt when a wave of rage and heartbreak hit me full force, I only know one person who could feel something that strong." I flicked my eyes back onto my son with confusion. "They came in the direction of the house." He said as I heard my wife gasp.

"Bella?" she whispered and jasper nodded.

"We need to leave, something doesn't feel right." I nodded and took off running full force, I looked to my side and saw rose, jasper and Esme close behind as Emmett was next to me looking lethal. If this wasn't such a serious time I would have laughed at Emmett playing the protective big brother. In a few minutes the house came into view and Bella's truck was in the driveway as was Alice's and Edward's.

I ran into the living room and saw Alice and Edward playing chess. I frowned and sniffed the air; her scent was fresh only and hour or two long.

"Where is she?" Emmett growled as he stalked over to his siblings.

"Where is who Emmett?" I was suddenly confused as to why Edward didn't know where she was when it was obvious she was just here.

"Bella, her truck is in the driveway but I can't hear or smell her at the house." I stated and saw my son and daughter stiffen.

I opened my mouth to ask why they where back when Esme came down the stairs looking frantic and clutching something to her chest.

"Esme, dear? What are you holding?" I felt my eyes widen as I saw her hold out the crest we gave Bella and a crumpled piece of paper. I took them both and started to read the paper when I gasped.

"Carlisle what is it?" Alice asked worried.

"She left us." I heard everyone gasp; I started to read the note for my family.

"Dear Cullen's,

I am sorry to say that I have recently discovered some disturbing news that it broke my heart and destroyed what was left to me, I am truly sorry and hopefully one day in the future I will see you again." I heard everyone gasp and my wife start to sob in my chest.

"Carlisle, you were like a father figure to me. Someone who I could look up to and I couldn't help but smile at the thought of how lucky I was to have someone as kind and compassionate like you as a father. I will always keep you close to my heart as I will Esme." I choked back a sob, she saw me as a father? I breathed in shakily and continued.

"Esme, you were like a mother to me in every way but blood. I am sorry to leave you like this and for the loss of another child and for that I am truly sorry, but what I will tell you later in this letter you will understand, I will always love you too Esme." My wife let out a heartbreaking sob and fell to the ground dragging me with her.

"Emmett, ah Emmett my big teddy bear of a brother, you could bring a smile to my face whenever I was feeling sad and broken, for that I will always love you big brother and don't let yourself get to upset and angry about what has happened. Please promise me that you will keep yourself, rose, Esme, Carlisle and jasper safe for me. I love you emmie-bear." I watched the worry and anger leave his face as he broke out into sobs on the floor as Rosalie held him; Emmett never lets his tough goofy act waver no matter what the consequence, I was also surprised she didn't mention Alice or Edward.

"Rosalie, I forgive you." – I saw everyone look at me and I didn't need to have jaspers power to know everyone was shocked. – "I know that you could seem like a heartless bitch but I can see past that and deep down I know you suffer from something horrible and I'm sorry, I wish I could of gotten to know you as much as I wanted to, you will always be the beautiful big sister I have ever wanted. I love you rose, don't ever doubt that." I was surprised when rose broke down into sobs on Emmett's shoulder instead of huffing and acting like it was nothing.

"Jasper, for this I am sorry. I know ever since my 18th it has been hard for you but please forgive and let go, I know this will hurt you deeply and for that knowledge I am sorry. I am not the brave little human you make me out to be I am the coward today. Please jasper be the soldier I know you are and be brave, I love you jazz and I am sorry." I felt a wave of shock and anger hit me, I turned to see a half broken and half angry jasper, but I couldn't help but feel anger and disappointment when I read the last part of the letter.

"Now for the news as to why you are reading this and discovered my crest, I have forever left the Cullen clan. I wish not to be around the two people who did this and I could never break apart the family again.

Today while you where out hunting I came over with a feeling of dread, I heard music coming from Edward's room. The music I know quite clear that it was Alice and Jaspers, that's when I heard a moan but it wasn't Jaspers name it was Edwards and if you found this note Esme that means they haven't realised I saw them together in bed. Goodbye my family I love you all but the cheaters.

With love your dearest

Bella." I heard my children growl at their brother and sister as I finished the letter and a heartbreaking sob escape from jaspers lips.

"HOW COULD YOU?" Emmett demanded as he sprung into a crouch. "This is the second time you broke my little sister, but now she is the one who left us." I watched my son and daughter get into a crouch growling furiously.

"Carlisle, esme please stop them." I looked towards Alice who was crying in Edward's shoulder.

"No, I will not allow this. Because of you too I lost another child who I loved like my own flesh and blood, I will not consider you two as my children any further. Pack and leave my house until I say you can come back." I looked at my wife who was glaring at them both, I was shocked that esme would raise her voice in that way at the two people who where also like children to her.

"Esme?" Edward whispered in agony as he looked at my wife.

No Edward, I want you both to give me our family crest. You have lost the honour of wearing them and to call yourself a Cullen. I saw shock cross his face before he took of the Cullen crest and hand it to me, Alice did the same and ran up to her room to pack.

"What did you say Carlisle?" I heard jasper force out.

"They are no longer Cullen's." Was all I said before I ran outside to find my daughter and bring her home, I found her scent and followed it into the forest? What is she doing in the forest? She got a long way out here.

I kept running until her scent came to a stop in the middle of no where, I sniffed again and tensed. She was gone, there is no trace of her after this, and how could that be? I ran back home to find Edward and Alice already gone and my family comforting jasper.

"She's gone, my daughter is gone. I followed her into the forest and then there was nothing, her scent just stopped. She's actually gone." I whispered as I sat on one of the couches. My family looked at me with heartbreak and shock, but I sware on my immortal life I will find my daughter.

Jasper POV

It's been 50 years since Bella has been missing and declared dead, everyone respected her wishes but it is not the same. Yes Emmett makes jokes but he stays quiet most of the time, he refuses to play video games and go to school, he's like an empty shell. Rosalie never looks in the mirror anymore, Esme sits in her room and looks at the pictures of Bella with the family and Carlisle, Carlisle took it as bad as I did. He stays at the hospital as humanly as possible and when he isn't he is with Esme or still looking for Bella, he doesn't believe she is dead and that she is still out their He vowed on his immortal life to find her. Me? Well I'm staying strong, yes I never talk to anyone only when needed or when I was spoken to directly, but I have stayed strong to be the fighting soldier Bella said I was.

Alice and Edward, yes well they were allowed to come back home after 40 years but still to this day hardly anyone speaks to them even Esme, they got married about ten years ago but still they are no longer Cullen's but a Masen.

"Everyone we're moving." Carlisle came in looking some what happier, when I reached out for his emotions all I got was shock, happiness, confusion and grief; an odd mix.

"What do you mean we ware moving? Where are we moving to?" I asked sceptically.

"I got a call from your friend peter jasper; apparently there is something important he has to tell us and he has invited us there to stay. Everyone pack a bag or something we need to catch a plane in an hour." I frowned as I ran up to my room to pack. Why did peter call Carlisle and not me? Why has he invited us to stay? And what's so damn important?

"I don't understand Carlisle, why are we going to Texas?" I heard rose ask with a sigh, but I didn't hear Emmett. I raced downstairs with a bag in hand; I fell backwards when I saw Emmett. He had no aura around him the cheerfulness is gone, he gave me a small sad smile and even his dimples didn't show.

This isn't Emmett this is someone else.

The drive to the airport was uncomfortable, no one uttered a word and you could have cut the tension with a knife, every time I sent out a wave of calm Emmett or rose would growl at me, but right now I would take the calm and the growling instead of the sadness of my family. The person who escorted us onto Peter's private jet looked like Bella before she ran away; Esme broke down into sobs as did Emmett while their mates comforted them. But who will comfort me?

Belle POV

"Belle, we must leave Texas. Peter told the Cullen's and they are coming." I whipped my head around to see Rewa; she was a vampire from New Zealand and someone who became like a sister and a best friend to me.

"No I have to destroy Maria, she's after jasper and peter; I don't care if I see them again as long as I don't run into the bastards that did this to me, but don't worry Rewa dear I will let you scare em', but not my family" I gave her a smile, Rewa love to cause fear that was her power. She could sense your worst fear and send you images of that fear, I also could do that too but I let her have that pleasure. You see my power is to copy and that's what I do I am like a sponge.

"Alright belle, but what about you're family do you wish to see them?" I stopped running and looked at her; to everyone else I might be the one who brings death I am Belle Whitlock but to people who are the innocent and my family I'm the selfless creature Isabella Swan.

"Yes I wish to see them, but I am afraid that they will be mad at me for leaving, for tearing away their family." I hung my head in shame as I remembered the way I left; I just left them a note and my crest.

"Belle sweetheart, by what you have told me of the Cullen's I have summed up their greatest fear was of loosing you. I have a feeling they will welcome you back with open arms, there is nothing to fear. Now lets go dear sister and see petie and charr." I looked at rewa who was smiling like that fat cat out of Alice and wonderland, the hole in my chest got bigger at the mention of Alice's name, would they really forgive me.

"I'm going to change my appearance to what peter and charlotte know me as okay, just until I can deal with seeing my family again and rewa I know your worst fear is me leaving you but that will never happen they will accept you to." I spoke softly as I closed my eyes; I felt the power I collected from one of my friends in Japan she had the power to change her appearance that included everything, scent, bone structure, hair, eyes, everything and her sister was an illiousonist. That is what confused me when I met them she gave off the illusion that they both had heartbeats.

I made my hair wavier and down past my waist I also made it blonde everyone who I let live knew that this is what I looked like, apparently to some I would be called an angel while the others said I look like Angelus Mortis when I fight. I made it so my cheeks had a tint of read and made my violet and golden eyes sky blue but I still could never get rid of the gold. I left my body the way it was my normal height and structure I got when I was turned vampire, apparently when I am in this form I give off a slight shimmer that attracts or draws you into me with fascination.

"I really do love that form on you Belle" I heard rewa sigh and I couldn't help but shoot her a look as to say 'no I'm not'. "Oh come on belle look at you, your beautiful in form or not I just wish I was that beautiful." She sighed again and I frowned, I am scarred beyond belief but she doesn't know that I never let my sister see bellow my collarbone or elbow and mid thigh.

"You're beautiful rewa, in your own way. Just because you have got bit marks on the side of your face doesn't mean you're not beautiful." I sighed, before we met she got into a fight with a few nomads over a little human girl she was trying to protect that lead her to the scars on her face, she was never proud of that and always denied her beauty.

"But look at you belle, you have been fighting for 50 years and look no scars anywhere. I just wish I was a better fighter." I hissed at her and she looked up in alarm, if showing her my scars will make her feel better then so be it.

"Do you think I not know how you feel sister, I never showed you pain and I never let you see. I always get hurt in battles but put an illusion around me so it makes it look like to you that I'm fine." I hissed as I ripped my shirt and jumper off as my jeans, I couldn't care less if I was just wearing a bra and panties and had to run to peters there looking like that as long as I made rewa feel pretty and accepted what she looked like.

I turned my head away as I heard rewa gasp and slowly move towards me, I felt her hands touch the scars on my arms and down my torso and lastly to my thigh. I couldn't find this situation awkward because I know rewa better then anyone else; she had to touch things to understand to make it like it was real to her.

"How many bites?" I swore if I wasn't a vampire I wouldn't have been able to hear the whisper come off her lips.

"Little over 4000 for the wars I lost count but 600 for the time I was human." I couldn't look at her, I feel ashamed of my body it was hideous yes but I could accept it to an extent, it reminds me of the lives I have saved yet at the same time of the lives I have taken.

"Why?" I looked at her confused; she had pity and confusion on her face.

"Why what?"

"Why did she do it? You never told me what happened." Oh she was asking about Victoria okay.

"She wanted revenge in her own little sick way; she thought Edward killed her mate so she came after me. A mate for a mate as she called it, after I found my oh so called fiancé and best friend together I left the Cullen's and did a stupid thing by running into the forest. I was tortured for days by other herself or her minions before she had enough and wanted Edward to suffer more so she changed me." I winced as all the memories came back to me, they say that your human memories fade after the change or a bit fuzzy but me I had to remember them all and see them crystal clear.

"What did they do to you?" I saw the anguish in her eyes as she asked the question I know she fears the answer of.

"I was beaten, broken, fed off, raped and then changed." I whispered and I heard rewa scream with rage.

"She is so lucky that stupid bitch and her little sheep were killed by you or I will hunt them down and fucking kill those scum myself." I was taken back at her outburst, my little sister never swears and this is probably the first time I heard it beside, heck, hell, god and damn.

"Shit rewa, who knew you, could swear." Automatically her hand clamped over her mouth and stared at me bug-eyed.

"Oh fudge, sorry belle I didn't mean to swear please don't yell at me please I didn't mean it." She broke down in sobs on the floor, her mother use to beat her if she ever let out a cuss and yell that she would rot in hell and other mean stuff if she ever did.

"Shhhh honey, it's alright I'm not going to hurt you, but I must say little sister it is quite a funny thing to see." I said with a smile and cradling her into my arms, that's the best thing about rewa she was small like Alice or Jane and could fit in my arms when she was upset.

"You mean it? You're not mad?" she looked up with a glimmer of hope in her eyes; I couldn't help but nod and cradle her into my arms more. Alright belles now cheer her up and maybe find something to wear your still standing in your underwear.

"Now hell I got to run to peters with only my underwear on." I said with fake sadness and embarrassment, but it worked because she cracked up laughing and took off in the direction of peters. I groaned because I perfectly knew who was going to be there and I was dreading the moment I was going to arrive.


A/N: so how do you like? Good-bad? Let me know.

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Saintxx