He was an idiot. A complete and totally idiot. He had had the most perfect female specimen on the planet and he had thrown it all away. He had been afraid of the commitment. He had been afraid, period. And he thought he wasn't cut out for their relationship. He thought if he left her, he would find better things.
But that hadn't been the case at all.
After he left, he realized how stupid and blind he had been. Nothing could be better than being with her. He would never be happier than when he was with her. He was ready for the commitment. He was ready for the relationship. He wanted her back.
But it wasn't that easy.
He imagined what would happen if he tried to win her back. He thought about what her reaction would be if he told her he made a mistake and wanted to be with her. He could just imagine her response. There was no doubt in his mind that if he contacted her and told her he regretted ever leaving, she would simply laugh in his face. She would laugh and tell him that she had told him it would happen. When he had left, she had predicted that he would come crawling back to her and ask her to take him back. She had always known that what they had was real and the best thing that happened to either of them, even if he was too stubborn to realize it. So he knew if he went back to her and begged for forgiveness, she would undoubtedly rub it in his face that she had been right all along, but he had just had to go and do his own thing. She would flat out reject him, of that he was sure.
For all he knew, she had probably found someone new. Someone who treated her like the queen she is. Someone who would never, ever break her heart the way he did. She had probably moved on and forgotten all about the stupid jerk that had run away from the best thing he ever had.
But he couldn't stop himself.
It was like his fingers dialed her number on their own. Before he knew what he was doing, the line was ringing and he had put the phone to his ear.
"Hello?" Her confused voice answered. It had been so long since he had heard her sweet voice, and for a second it rendered him speechless.
He cleared his voice and said the first thing that was on his mind. "I love you."
"Chuck? Is that you?" She sounded upset. Not a good sign, but he kept talking. It was like he couldn't stop the words from coming out of his mouth.
"I made a huge mistake. I want to come back. I want to be with you. I'm sorry, Blair" His voice cracked at this point. He had tears in his eyes and he was on the verge of completely breaking down. This was his one and only chance. He had to make her understand that he needed her. "I was stupid. I never should have left you. There is nothing and no one better than you. I've learned my lesson."
She sighed. "Chuck, I-, I don't know what-"
"Blair, you're everything. You're all that I have ever wanted. You're all I could ever need. I'm tired of being away from you. I'm tired of always being alone. I thought when I left that I would go back to my carefree, partying ways, but I couldn't. I can't escape you. You're always in my head. Leaving you was the stupidest thing I have ever done; and we both know I've done some pretty stupid things."
"Look, Blair, I know what you're going to say. You're going to say 'I told you so,' right? I know. You were right. You were right, Blair. I never should have left. Being with you was and is the best thing that could ever happen to me. I lo-"
"Chuck would you shut up?" Blair yelled at him. Even though they were on the phone, he could still hear the tears that were choking up her voice. "I love you too, Basshole. You stupid little Motherchucker. You're right; I did tell you this would happen. But you just had to go and leave. You broke my heart, Chuck."
He was crying at this point. Not loud, uncontrollable sobs, but there were definitely tears running down his face. He never cried, but just hearing the hurt in her voice and thinking about all the pain he caused her hurt him too. And he thought he was losing her. Her reaction was exactly what he thought it would be. He was too late.
"Blair, I'm so, so sorry. I was stupid and a coward. Leaving you was the dumbest thing I could have ever done. But I still love you. I never stopped loving you. Being away from you has made me love you more than ever. I need you, Blair. Without you, my life is worthless."
He heard a sob escape her throat and his heart broke just a little bit more. "Blair, don't cry. Please. I'm sorry. I'll-, I shouldn't have called. I'm sorry. I'll-, I'll just leave you alone."
He moved the phone away from his ear to hang up, but her panicked voice stopped him. "No! No, Chuck, don't hang up! Were you listening to me? I said I love you. I still love you, you Basstard. My heart broke when you left because I love you, and I still can't get over you. You left me and yet I haven't been able to move on. As much as I want to hate you, I can't. I love you too much
"Come home, Chuck."
He was speechless. He couldn't believe it. "I-, ah, I-, Blair, are you sure?"
She let out a short laugh through her tears, and even through the phone he could tell she rolled her eyes "Yes Bass. Quit stuttering like a buffoon. I want you to come back. I love you. No matter how much you hurt me, I'm still going to love you."
"I love you too, Blair. I'm going to be better, I promise."
"I know you will, Chuck, I know." Over the phone he could picture her with tears on her cheeks and shining in her eyes with a small smile on her face.
He wouldn't break his promise. He couldn't. If there was one thing he learned from running away from her, it was that he needed her more than anything. He couldn't stay away from her, even if he tried.
A/N: Like my last story, Amtrak is for Lovers, this story is based off a song and uses some of the lyrics throughout. This one is based on "I Told You So" by Carrie Underwood feat. Randy Travis. This chapter is only the first verse. I'm going to do the second verse as a similar scenerio but with the roles reversed. The song is more of a sad song, but I really wanted Chuck and Blair to end up together. But like I said in "Amtrak," I don't really want to manipulate the story to fit the lyrics, the lyrics are more of a loose inspiration.
When I was proof-reading this, it reminded me a lot of the final scene of the season finale. I think there is a lot of similar wordings or something, even though the situation is completely different. But if anyone else gets that impression, just know it was completely unintentional, though i did watch that episode today, so it might have been some subconscious influence. hahaha.
Hopefully I'll have the second chapter up in the next day or 2, and then there MIGHT be a third chapter that will still be based off the song, but from a totally different perspective, but I'm still working through that one.