Broken Toy Soldier

Little toy soldier, stand up straight.

Little toy soldier, know your fate.

Little toy soldier, shirt stained red,

Little toy soldier, fall down dead.

"Hey, Kenny!" Kenny snapped his head up. He'd been sort of zoned out; playing the PSP1 he'd managed to snag back from Cartman once a new system had caught his eye. He was leaning against the wall of the school, because he didn't feel like going home just yet. When he'd left for school this morning, they'd been fighting pretty hard, and he really, really didn't want to be there until they were finished.

"Mm? Kyle?" He asked, vaguely remembering Kyle and Stan having a conversation earlier about going to Raisins after school. So why was Kyle over here? Wasn't Raisins the other direction? Wait- his thoughts buzzed for a moment would they invite him? Really? They never did that. Would they?

Kyle looked like he was in a hurry, and took his backpack off. He started shuffling around inside of it. "I heard that today was your birthday! Why didn't you tell me?"Kyle grinned, and pulled a colourfully wrapped package out. Kenny eyed it warily, but with a vicious curiosity.

"Uh, I didn't really think about it. My birthday's never been a big deal... I guess I forgot." He said, without taking his eyes off of the box. Kyle handed it to him.

"Happy birthday Kenny! But I gotta go, so I'll see you tomorrow, okay?" Kyle waved, and ran off the other direction. Kenny's face fell a little. They didn't want to invite him. Even on his birthday.

Kenny turned the little package over in his hands, savoring the anticipation he so rarely experienced.

He ripped the paper off fervently, and tore open the flaps of the box. Pushing aside little bits of coloured paper that were keeping the box's contents from sliding around away, he looked at his little gift nestled among the wrappings.

It was a little toy soldier, with a little plastic gun propped up against its shoulder.

Kenny stared at it for a moment, wondering what possessed Kyle to give him something so weird for his birthday. Not that he was complaining about a gift by any means, but he was certainly perplexed by the strange choice. He shrugged, and picked it up in one hand. The little soldier's left hand shifted, and fell back into the box. Kenny just sighed.

It was broken.

Kenny was leaning against a wall again. It was very similar to the wall he had been leaning against on his ninth birthday, seven years prior. It was attached to his school, it was brick, and it smelled like smoke and goth kids. But this was a wall attached to a high school instead of a middle school.

By staying in school, Kenny had surprised most of the people who knew him.2 His family was dirt poor and couldn't send him to college, and they were constantly drunk and so abusive they probably wouldn't send him even if they had the money. But of course, they didn't, so it was a moot point.

His sixteenth birthday had rolled around, and when he kept on coming to school, people raised a lot of eyebrows. He wasn't even that smart of a kid, Kenny was at best an average student. The likelihood of getting a scholarship could be considered by an optimist to be low at best. No, Kenny was expected to drop out and get a full-time job, seeing as his parents really wanted him out of the house by this time. Kevin had moved out awhile ago, and Kenny's sister Karen3 had been sent off to live with relatives several years ago. That had mostly been Kenny's idea. He hated to think of himself, the dirt-poor pervert Kenny, as soft, but he had honestly been really worried about his little sister. She was growing up in a poor, abusive family in a hick town in the mountains. Karen had always been pretty soft-spoken, and her needs were rarely met to the extent they should have been. Her older brother had been worried about what would happen to her mental state, and deep down, had actually been worried about her turning to prostitution. Rather than worry about that, had called in some old favors and had 'relatives' adopt her. Of course, upon explaining this situation to his parents and having them sign the adoption papers, they had been too wasted to remember they didn't have relatives.

So the fact that Kenny was still here was an oddity no one really understood. His grades had been improving since his birthday, though, so his teachers didn't feel the need to ask questions, and Kenny's friends never really cared.

"Hey, Kenny!" Kenny was jerked out of his thoughts by the call of his name, and looked towards the source of the voice. It was his friend Kyle whom he'd known since they were in preschool.

"Hey Kyle!" Kenny said brightly, standing up.

"You ready to go?"

Kenny nodded, "Thanks for the ride. Now if I could afford a car, I wouldn't have to make you drive me everywhere!" He laughed, scratching the back of his head.

"That's okay Kenny. I have to give Stan a ride anyway since he got his license taken away again," Kyle interrupted himself with an over-exaggerated roll of the eyes, "and carpooling is good for the environment."

Kenny's lips twitched, "You're not turning into some crazy eco-friendly bastard, are you?"

"No way," Kyle said, turning back towards his car, "But it keeps the manbearpigs4 away." They both burst out laughing, and Kenny felt his heart warm up a little bit.


Draik: Viola! Stupid ensues!

Kenny: I'll say. I didn't get ANY porn for the ENTIRE chapter.

Draik: Oh, like you need any more you pervert.

Kyle: What the hell was this chapter about, anyway? Nothing even happened.

Kenny: And why the hell does Kyle give such shitty ass presents?

Draik: *twitch* It's this little thing called plot. I'm setting up the plot. All will become clear! *dramatic pose*

Kenny: …Riiiiiight, so seriously, what's going on?

Draik: If I told you guys everything, why would anyone read it? Kyle and his shitty ass presents shall be explained in later chapters, should I chose to write them!

Kyle: You might not finish? What?

Stan: But I wanna be in the story, godammit!

Draik: Shut the hell up you idiots! I'll probably write a couple more chapters, but I'm a really lazy person with a really poor memory.

Kenny: But… but… the porn! The porn!

Draik: ah, shut up Kenny. Go die somewhere.

Kenny: ;____;

1 Reference to episode 'Best Friends Forever'

2 The legal drop out age here is 16, and I'm pretty sure it's the same in Colorado. Feel free to correct me.

3 Matt and Trey have identified the little girl who looks like Kevin that wanders around Kenny's house as 'Karen' a few times. I can only assume she's his sister.

4 Reference to episode 'ManBearPig'