New chapter here! I was fast wasn't I? Well faster than usual! Anyways...enjoy!
Chapter 33 A dinner with Nii-sama
After Ichigo and the others had left, the Rogue Hunter Lady fished out her phone and decided to make a call.
"Hello?" She spoke after the other person picked up. "Yes this is her. The plan didn't work. No those idiots brought some humans along." She grumbled. "I know sir. But don't worry I'll try again. After all pure bloods that have a risk of turning rogue are just as dangerous as actual rogues. That's why I'm gonna' get those future psychopaths." She grinned sinisterly. "Actually they did right in grabbing that orange haired kid. Yep he's definitely a candidate for our process." She said. "His name? Ichigo. Kurosaki Ichigo."
-\/ \/-\/ \/-\/ \/-
By the time they reached the Kurosaki residence, Yuzu and Karin had fallen asleep. Ichigo had to carry them in, with Rukia not far behind after saying her goodbyes to Byakuya and Renji. After Karin and Yuzu had gone to sleep, Ichigo opened his bedroom door and was greeted to the overpowering scent of bleach and citrus cleaning fluid.
"Oh yeah that rogue hunter woman said she sent some professional cleaners to get rid of the blood." Ichigo said.
"They work fast." Rukia commented.
"Yeah but now it stinks of chemicals." Ichigo covered his nose. He opened the window to let in some ventilation, and they decided to wait downstairs until the smell had faded. Ichigo decided to check his phone for messages, and he had a voicemail from his dad.
"Hello my dearest son! There's been a stomach flu bug going around so I'll have to be working overtime for the whole weekend! I'll be sleeping at the clinic so take care of my three precious daughters! Make sure Karin and Yuzu brush their teeth and do their homework! Oh and for Rukia-chan, make sure you use condoms!"
"Well at least we won't have to come up with an excuse for what happened, since Oyaji was at the clinic." Ichigo told Rukia as he sat down on the sofa beside her. He glanced towards Rukia, noticing her silence.
"Ichigo…" Rukia began, but then was caught off guard, when Ichigo laid his head on her lap. "W-what are you—?"
"I'm tired." Ichigo sighed.
"Y-you idiot…"Rukia blushed, but didn't try to fight him. Ichigo closed his eyes, as she gingerly ran her hand through his orange hair.
"It was just an accident you know?" Ichigo said. "It's not like it was your fault so you don't have to blame yourself."
"Huh? Oh I don't care about that." Rukia replied matter of factly.
"W-what?" Ichigo shot up. "T-then why were you looking all serious?"
"Actually there was this limited edition Chappy mini shovel up for auction online, but I didn't get it. Some fiend in England bid one dollar higher." Rukia shook her head in disgust.
"…a shovel." Ichigo had an unreadable expression on his face. His eye twitched slightly. Then he suddenly stood up and slammed his palms on the coffee table. "A stupid shitty shovel?"
"Shh! You fool! You'll wake up Karin and Yuzu!" Rukia hissed. "And it's not stupid or shitty. It's amazing and comes with the rare Chappy paw print emblem sticker."
"Well excuse me! I thought you'd be—oh I don't know—maybe a little concerned that your teacher, and your best friend had just got captured. That Yuzu and Karin were kidnapped! T-that I…" He let out a sharp breath and sunk back down onto the couch, massaging his forehead. "I couldn't do anything…" It was almost a whisper. "What if…it wasn't an accident? I couldn't save Karin and Yuzu. They could have gotten hurt…they could've…Ow!" Ichigo looked up to see Rukia staring down at him, her fist still in the air.
"So what? You couldn't do anything…sitting here crying about it isn't going to make you more capable of saving them in the future." Rukia stated.
"I wasn't crying!" Ichigo blushed. "And I know that!"
"Good." She grinned. "Then you're ready."
"Ready for what?"
"We're going to have dinner with Nii-sama tomorrow night. We'll talk about it then."
"Huh? Why can't you just tell me now?" Ichigo asked. "Ready for what?"
"So are you hungry? You didn't get any blood today right?" Rukia asked, ignoring Ichigo's queries. "Do you still feel like eating sweet things? Before you said you felt like eating sugary foods."
"Hm…no I'm fine, I'm tired so I'll just go to bed." Ichigo answered.
"Oh…ok." Rukia said, feeling a little disappointed.
-\/ \/-\/ \/-\/ \/-
"Hey Rukia…" Ichigo nudged the short girl.
"…Ichigo? What happened?" Rukia rubbed her sleepy eyes, and stepped out of her closet bed. It was still dark outside, and she could barely make out Ichigo's expression. Suddenly she was shoved against the wall and she felt Ichigo's warm lips brush her neck. Immediately Rukia punched him in the gut, sending him falling to the floor.
"Ow! Rukia?" Ichigo grumbled.
"What do you think you're doing to someone who's half asleep in the middle of the night!" Rukia reprimanded, cheeks tinted pink.
"I was hungry!" Ichigo replied angrily, while rubbing his stomach where he'd been hit.
"W-well that's…you could have just said that." Rukia said. "Or better yet, grab one of the blood juice boxes from the drawer and drink that. Instead of waking me up every time you need a quick fix. Shame on you fool!"
"Geez what's your problem?" Ichigo groaned. "I could have done that. But I was going to drink your blood, because I thought you liked it."
"W-what?" Rukia blushed. "W-when did I say that…"
"I mean honestly it seemed like you enjoyed it more than I do." Ichigo shrugged. "But now you're saying you don't want me to, so I guess I'll—."
"W-wait!" Rukia grabbed his arm. "You…f-fine…drink the blood juice box! You think I enjoyed it that much huh? Well guess what? I faked it. In reality it felt like a leech on my neck!" She pointed a finger right in his face, making the carrot top twitch. "An ugly fat leech!"
"Y-you little…" Ichigo glared.
"Hm? What's that leech man? I can't understand you~." Rukia smirked. "After all you're just a leech, its not like you can speak human words. Not like Chappy~ In the cartoon special, Chappy could speak perfectly in Japanese. Because Chappy's cute unlike a certain leech~"
"Again with that stupid Chappy?" That was the last straw for Ichigo. He picked up Rukia, and despite her protests, he was too strong for her. He plopped her down on the bed and pushed himself on top of her.
"M-me or that Chappy thing…" Ichigo blushed.
"Huh? Rukia blinked.
"What?" Rukia chuckled. "You're jealous of…Chappy?"
"S-shut up and choose one!" Ichigo's cheeks reddened more. "Me or—."
"I choose Chappy." Rukia grinned, noticing Ichigo becoming even more frustrated. "What are you going to do about it hm?"
"You idiot." Ichigo got closer. "Can your stupid Chappy do this?" Ichigo held Rukia's cheek with his right hand, their mouths inches away. He slid his left arm under and around her waist pulling her even closer. Rukia could feel his breath on her cheek, his firm muscled body pressing closer.
"I-Ichigo…" Rukia breathed, as Ichigo's tongue ran across her neck.
-\/ \/-\/ \/-\/ \/-
"Well looks like you guys don't waste anytime." Renji commented noticed the bite mark on Rukia's neck, as they were walking to school the next morning. Both Ichigo and Rukia blushed heavily, while Rukia flustered to cover it up with a band aid she fished out of her school bag.
"I-Its—." Rukia tried to explain.
"Anyways…" Renji sighed, waving it away. "So you guys are going to have that dinner thing with Byakuya-dono tonight right?"
"Yeah…you coming?" Ichigo asked.
"Me? No I wasn't invited." Renji replied. "Besides it's got nothing to do with me."
"Well that's true." Ichigo nodded.
"Aw c'mon, I'm sure Nii-sama wouldn't mind if you came." Rukia said. "Besides we're going to that special restaurant that caters to vampires. Apparently it's really hard to find."
"Huh? Oh that place? I already went there before" Renji said.
"You did? By yourself?" Rukia asked.
"No. I went with B—." Renji decided not to tell Rukia that he went with Byakuya because then she would just make a big deal even thought nothing happened, and Ichigo would tease him.
"With who?" Rukia asked an excited expression on her face. "Someone who's name starts with a B?" She pressed.
"Uh…B…Bill from accounting!" Renji blathered.
"I-I don't know!" Renji flustered and dashed away at abnormal speeds.
Ichigo shook his head. "He's really transparent."
-\/ \/-\/ \/-\/ \/-
"Ok class, I'm so excited for today's lesson!" Yumichika squealed. It was the next day, at P.E. class. "Today we're going to try on ballroom dancing outfits!" He bounced around in a little dance while Ikkaku rolled in tons and tons of racks of sparkly clothes.
"Yumi-sensei do we really have to put these on?" Tatsuki sighed apathetically.
"Yeah seriously! These dresses will completely take away from Hime's beauty!" Chizuru complained, rather loudly. "And not to mention her boobs! Which is like half of her beauty!"
"On not you again!" Yumichika groaned. "Listen! I am the teacher so do what I say and put on these sparkly dance outfits!"
"Hey why are the pants and shirts connected?" A brown haired male student asked.
"So that you don't drop your pants while dancing." Yumichika explained.
"I bet that bald dude drops his pants for Yumi-sensei every night." A student with a bowl cut commented, while some other students chuckled.
"That's it!" Ikkaku marched right up to them, and got right up in the bowl cut boy's face. "Listen here you little bastard. This is a shaved scalp! Can't you see the hair follicles?" The students looked at Ikkaku's scalp and could see nothing but a very shiny head. Suddenly some of the glitter from Yumichika's ballroom costumes glinted off Ikkaku shiny head and blinded the students.
"My eyes! It burns!" They cried.
"That's what you brats get." Ikkaku snorted.
"Ikkaku stop blinding the students, and come put this on." Yumichika instructed and held up a sparkling red sequined blouse and spandex black pants.
Ikkaku stared at the glittery get up and groaned. "I hate my life."
-\/ \/-\/ \/-\/ \/-
"Ishida-kun!" Ishida turned around, to see Orihime running up to him. School had just ended, and students were filing out of the area.
"Let's walk home together ne?" The auburn haired girl smiled.
"S-sure." Ishida blushed.
"Weren't those costumes that Yumi-sensei brought funny?" Orihime giggled. "B-but I think you looked nice in that sparkly blue top Ishida-kun."
"T-thanks…the construction for the slacks were all over the place though. I would like to get the number to complain to the amateur who thought they were doing right by that fabric by handling it so poorly. They should be ashamed to call themselves a seamstress." Ishida shook his head, clearly disgusted. Then realized his excessive complaining. "Ah sorry."
"No its ok." Orihime smiled. "It's nice to see you're so passionate about sewing Ishida-kun." Ishida blushed and looked down, while adjusting his glasses.
"A-actually Inoue-san…there's this sewing convention next weekend at the craft store…and I-I was wondering if you…i-if you…."
"T-that sounds like fun!" Orihime cheered. "I'd love to go Ishida-kun!"
"R-really?" Ishida blinked, astounded that she would agree.
"Yeah! Then maybe afterward we can get something to eat at the café next to the craft store!" Orihime exclaimed, excitedly. "They make really good pastries."
Ishida smiled. "I…I would like that very much."
-\/ \/-\/ \/-\/ \/-
"Look at our dear son Masaki!" Isshin cried. "He's already going off to get married and he's taking our precious third daughter as his bride!"
"Relax Oyaji, we're just having dinner with Rukia's brother." Ichigo sighed, as he adjusted his tie and looked in the bathroom mirror to adjust his hair.
"Ichigo? Are you done applying your makeup? Nii-sama's going to be her soon!" Rukia called from downstairs.
"Shut up! I'm coming!" Ichigo shouted back.
"Ichigo…" Isshin wore a rare serious expression as he put a hand on Ichigo's shoulder.
"Ichigo remember be confident. Don't be intimidated if he shows you his gun collection, he's just trying to scare you. Ok let's do a practice. If he asks you if you and Rukia-chan have had sex…what will you say?"
"I'm going." Ichigo walked past his dad.
"Wait Ichigo! Daddy needs to know these things before anyone else!" Isshin cried.
-\/ \/-\/ \/-\/ \/-
"Geez where the hell is this place?" Ichigo groaned, as Byakuya parked in front of a dark alley. When they got inside the restaurant and took their seats at a round booth with Rukia in the middle, Ichigo opened up the menu.
"Woah…the blood…there's so much." He ogled the menu like a kid at a candy store, until he saw the prices. "Geh…this place is expensive. Hey Byakuya are you treating us?"
"Ichigo!" Rukia kicked him under the table.
"I'm treating Rukia and myself." Byakuya stated.
"Nii-sama…." Rukia sighed.
"Well fine, then I'll just wait until tonight to eat, right Rukia?" Ichigo smirked. "Besides it'll be more satisfying that way…for both of us." Byakuya tried his best to maintain his composure, though it was quite obvious he was emitting waves of hate throughout the whole restaurant.
"A-anyways…" Rukia tried to clear the tension, when her phone rang. "Ah excuse me Nii-sama. Behave Ichigo." She warned before she stepped away to answer it. "Hello?"
"Hey." It was Renji. "How's the dinner going?"
"Awful. Nii-sama refuses to pay and Ichigo is just making it worse." Rukia sighed. "Hey Renji what do you think I should do?"
"Hell if I know, those two are like oil and water."
"Well thanks that's so helpful." Rukia deadpanned.
"Sorry…hey what about getting them drunk? Everything always seems better when you're drunk."
"That's your suggestion? Get them drunk?" Rukia sighed. "Maybe I'll just—." Rukia was interrupted by a scream. "Uh Renji I'll call you back." She hung up and ran back to her table to see forks everywhere; wedged into the booth, jammed through the table all over the table. Ichigo was glaring at Byakuya, and Byakuya had a deadly glint in his eye.
Needless to say they were kicked out of the restaurant.
"This is what happens when you're throwing those stupid forks around." Ichigo complained, as the three walked down the street towards Byakuya's car.
"I said it before, and I'll say it again. The fork slipped." Byakuya said.
"How could 56 forks slip huh?" Ichigo shouted. Rukia knew she had to do something or these two would never get along, when she spotted a small restaurant and pub across the street. At this rate it couldn't hurt she figured.
-\/ \/-\/ \/-\/ \/-
"Uh...this is…" Ichigo stared at the sight in front of him.
"I-I guess this was a bad idea…" Rukia sweat dropped. "But I didn't know Nii-sama was so bad with alcohol." Byakuya was hiccupping and leaning against the table while nursing an empty martini glass. His porcelain white cheeks were bright pink.
"He didn't even drink that much…" Ichigo noted. Then the noble suddenly shot up, shaky on his feet, he walked over to a table of complete strangers and started drunkenly flirting simultaneously with a woman and man. "Ok….I think its time to go…" Ichigo sighed. Ichigo and Rukia supported Byakuya's weight as they left the restaurant. They dragged him to the car, put him in the backseat, and belted him up, and then they sat up front with Rukia in the driver's seat. Byakuya didn't say anything and just sat in the back, as if in a sleepy daze.
"He still barely talks even though he's drunk." Ichigo said.
"Yeah he just becomes really flirty." Rukia giggled.
"I thought you were gonna' mention something stupid like putting him in a room with Renji or something." Rukia's eyes lit up.
"Ichigo! That's a great idea!" Rukia gasped.
"What? No! I was just….ah shit."
-\/ \/-\/ \/-\/ \/-
"Renji!" Rukia called out, as they knocked on Renji's bedroom door. "Hm, he won't answer his phone. You think he's sleeping?"
"I don't know…"Ichigo replied, holding up the drunk, now sleeping Byakuya. "Let's just put him in his room and go."
"Fine…" Rukia gave up. "Nii-sama's room is this way." She gestured down the hall, when they saw Yoruichi walking.
"Ah if it isn't Ichigo and Rukia." She grinned and walked up to them. "What happened to ole Bya-bo?" She laughed. "Got a little drunk there did he?"
"Uh yes…" Rukia said.
"Well anyways, I'm glad I caught you guys because I wanted to give you these." She handed them ivory envelopes.
"What are these?" Ichigo asked.
"Wedding invitations." She grinned. "See ya." At that she was gone.
"A wedding? Who's getting married?" Ichigo asked Rukia.
"I didn't know Yoruichi-san was dating anyone." Rukia blinked, and then realized something. "Ichigo…where's Nii-sama?"
It's the greatest Bleach love triangle! Ichigo x Rukia x Chappy! Unfortunatly it doesn't seem like Chappy will be getting any for a while.