Disclaimer: I don't own Miss Saigon and I don't own the main characters. I own Ellen Hao, Hao, Samuel Marcus and the triplets. I also own the captain of the ship. Feel free to use any characters of mine you want. Regular is the story italics is the flashbacks and anything in bold is Ellen's letter to Chris.

Ellen sat on the veranda on the top floor of her apartment. She had a very thoughtful look on her face. She was about to do something that she never thought she would do. But then again today was full of surprises. She sighed and got out a pen and paper.

It all started that morning. Ellen had just finished baking cookies. The doorbell rang.

"Coming," she called and went to answer the door. Her heart caught in her throat when she saw it was Kim and with Kim was a little boy who couldn't be any under then 2 or 3.

My darling Chris by the time you receive this letter I will already be dead. I have loved you from the moment I laid eyes on you and in heaven or hell I will love you still. I hope you can forgive me for what I have to do. Remember, you once made a sacrifice for love and I am now doing the same. Kim and Tam need you more then I do.

Ellen had known the moment would come when she met Kim. She never thought she would like Kim. She definitely didn't suspect she would grow to love her. She wanted desperately to hate Kim but that idea went out the window the minute she saw the little boy. She was so loving and so attentive to him.

"You must be Kim," she said with a smile, "I recognize you from the picture Chris keeps of you"

"Yes. I am Kim and this is Tam"

Ellen knelt to Tam's level and said hello.

"I was just baking cookies," Ellen said, "would you like one"

I was stunned to discover that Tam didn't know what cookies were. What child doesn't know such a thing? Then I remembered he lived in a world different then mine. He was sheltered for his entire life. Someone has to protect him and I must be the one to do it… for I will not allow him to so early in life taste the harsh reality it brings.

Tam had been delighted by the cookies. He declared it the 'goodest' thing he ever tasted. Ellen watched as Kim gently cleaned off his face and tenderly stroked his hair. Tam looked exhausted so Ellen had gently carried him into her own bedroom and laid him down on what he declared the 'most comfable bed ever'. She led Kim into the den so that they could talk.

"Please," Ellen motioned to Kim, "sit down. Make yourself comfortable… or should I say comfable. Your son is the most adorable child I have ever met."

"Thank you so much," Kim said, "for welcoming us into your house. How do you know Chris," she added

Kim asked me how I know you. I didn't want to tell her the truth. She looked so fragile I thought she might break in a heartbeat. At the same time she had to know the truth. I would not dishonor her by not being straight-forward.

Ellen had explained to Kim, as gently as possible that she and Chris were married for about 7 months now.
"You were gone for 3 years and he was told that you were dead. He was absolutely distraught and he never got over it. He still talks about you all the time. But he had to move on with his life or he would go crazy"

Kim seemed to accept Ellen's explanation with ease. She reassured Ellen that she held no ill will toward her.

"I like you ma'am," she told her

"Please," Ellen replied, "call me Ellen"

"I like you Ellen," Kim said.

After I told her the answer to what happened, I asked her if she would mind telling me her story. She paused for what seemed like forever. In actuality is was probably just a few seconds. The story she told stunned me. It made me more aware that there is a world beyond the one I lived in.

Ellen learned that Kim was born the only child of two fairly well off parents. In her country you were only allowed one child. As it was a girl, the doctor urged her parents to drown her in the local river or at least give her up to the orphanage so they might try for a boy. Her parents loved her and they refused. The doctor tried hard to convince them but to no avail.

"The doctor wanted your parents to get rid of you," Ellen asked in horror.

"Yes. He said I was defected."

"Kim," Ellen said, "you are a lot of things but defected is DEFINITELY not one of them.

"Dad and momma said that too."

When I learned the doctor tried to convince Kim's parents to kill or give her away I was stunned. She wasn't a puppy or some sort of toy you can exchange if you don't like what you get. She was a person… a baby. If anyone ever suggested I should get rid of my baby I would rip out their heart and suck out the hold in the middle. It just would never happen.

'Am I doing the right thing,' Ellen asked herself for what seemed like the millionth time. There were a lot of possible solutions but this was the only viable one. She loved Chris and couldn't live with the idea that he was with someone else. At the same token she knew Tam needed his parents—both of them. She couldn't think of any other answer that was plausible.

"I was the most spoiled kid growing up, not by choice. My parents for instance would not allow me to help with the harvest. They insisted that summertime was for playing and getting fresh air. I also went to school. It was very rare for a Vietnamese girl to go to school because back then only boys were permitted but $400 in the administrator's pocket and I was in."

Did you know that where Kim grew up, only boys were permitted to attend school. Her parents had to pay the administrator to allow her to go. Again in the world that I lived in both boys and girls were not only allowed but mandated to go to school. At times we didn't enjoy it but dang if it wasn't worth it when we went!

How could anyone be denied the gift of education. It didn't make sense to Ellen. In America they valued education for it was a good way to further yourself. It was the law that children had to go to school at least till they were 18. Many people chose to further their education by going to collage.

"From day 1," Kim said, "school was a struggle for me. I had what is called a pituitary tumor so by age 7 I had breasts. People didn't look at me when they talked to me. They looked at my breasts. It made me feel like a circus clown instead of a person."

I can't imagine being seven years old and being in a classroom where I was undervalued because of my gender, gawked at because I was big for my age (developmentally). Chris, I hope you can forgive me for the choice I made. I know one day, even if it's not right away I will be in the right place and one day we will be reunited. I don't know what way but I know it will happen. I cannot live without you but I cannot live knowing that I am not the one for you.

Ellen closed her eyes and let the breeze sweep gently onto her face.

"Please," she prayed, "help me find the strength and the courage to do what I need to do"

A solitary tear escaped her eye and rolled down her face.

She chewed the top of the pen for a second thinking about what she had to say. Somehow she hoped he would understand the hell she was going through right now.

Kim stopped tears flowing. Apparently the next part of this was very hard for her to remember. Ellen put a hand on her shoulder and rubbed it gently waiting patiently for Kim to continue. Soon enough or maybe too soon she did. The next part broke Ellen's heart.

At the moment I am writing this I am going through hell. Remember when you were… when you went through the hurt you went through many years ago? Remember what it was looking onto the faces of those you held dear and not being able to heal their hurt. That's how I am feeling at the moment. It's an awful feeling to have.

There was no doubt in Ellen's mind that Chris loved her. There was no doubt in Ellen's mind that Chris would grieve for Ellen. There was also no doubt in Ellen's mind that the love he felt for Ellen was that of a dear friend while the love he felt for Kim was true and deep. Chris had done so much for Kim and his love never ended. It never even took a break.

"At the age of 12 I was raped. I had gotten pregnant. When I told my parents they asked me what I wanted to do. They said they would support any decision I made and help me through it. I decided I wanted to keep the baby"

When you find out that I am dead, I want you to promise not to grieve but to remember the love and the friendship we shared. I want you to look into the eyes of the little boy that I died for. I want you to look into the eyes of that beautiful sweet woman that I died for. I want you to love them and to continue to love me… and from heaven or hell I will as I said before continue to love you. I want you to let your heart chose what's right.

Ellen heard a bird singing in the background. She loved birds. That was one thing she was going to miss. She would also miss the rain, walking on the beach, going swimming and reading at night by moonlight. She comforted herself with the hope that she'll be in heaven and all those things and better would be there.

A fire later consumed Kim's village and her parents and everyone she loved. She was 14 and ½ weeks pregnant at the time. Twelve years old, pregnant and all alone… it was a horrible thing to happen to anyone. The landlord that owned the house her parents lived in was away on vacation and he survived the fire. He was kind and allowed her to stay in the house for awhile free of charge.

I pray that Tam will have an opportunity to have a good life and that Kim will finally have the life she deserves to have. I cannot say my life was always easy. It was better then hers. Honey look inside your heart and ask yourself, if it was me wouldn't I have done the same thing. I believe you will find that the answer is yes.

'I should really put in my letter who gets what of mine,' Ellen thought. She had few things that were precious to her but she did have some of it that meant a lot to her and she had some definite ideas about what she wanted. She wouldn't let her precious stuff go to just anyone. She would put it in the letter. She knew she could trust Chris with it.

"His name was Yuiche. Where I come from Yuiche means kindness and the landlord was kind… kind of a snake. For three weeks he treated me like a princess. He made sure I had everything I needed. After that he started to demand I pay him back in either money, which I didn't have or sexual favors which I was not willing to perform.

In my dresser drawer I have a collection of porcelain birds… one that my sister had admired since she saw there. I want you to see to it that my sister gets the birds. My necklace… and the key well I want that to go to Kim. I think the necklace would give her strength (plus it would look beautiful on her slender neck). I want the toys I had put aside for the children I was hoping we would have, to go to Tam.

Ellen didn't know for sure that she was doing what was right. She especially doubted it once she felt the warm breeze on her face. She loved that breeze. She would really miss it. If she didn't do it though, what would Tam miss.

"Since I refused to have sex with him and I couldn't pay him, he threw me out of the house. I was living in the streets for awhile. I had to eat out of garbage cans. My life was a nightmare till I found a kind couple willing to take me in. Not long after I met the couple I gave birth to my daughter.

Remember all the good times. Remember the laughs that we shared and the times we declared the love we have for one another but most of all remember Caleea. Remember the place where 'it' happened. Remember the reason 'it' happened. Remember I love you.

Kim was Chris's first and only love. He had given so much for her. Chris had never stopped loving Kim. He was always comparing Ellen and Kim. In fact Ellen could remember challenging him a few times saying he loved Kim more then her.

"I named my daughter Hao. In my country Hao means perfection. She was perfect. Ten tiny fingers, ten tiny toes two beautiful eyes and a precious nose is what momma would say. Layan and Vilmas, that's the couple that took me in also fell in love with Hao and she was like their own grandchild."

Just remember that I will always be there with you. I will be there when the sun shines and you feel it on your face. I will be there in the breath of the wind. Don't even think about me being in the wrong place because you know how persistent I can be and I'm sure that will not change in the afterlife. I will be there with you when you hear the music coming from Paradise park which you took me on our first date.

Paradise park was the most beautiful and wonderful place Ellen had ever been to. She could still hear the music when you first enter. She could still taste the cotton candy and the popcorn. She could still feel the rides. There was no doubt that Ellen loved that place.

"Due to my difficult time and improper care during my pregnancy, Hao soon took ill… and when she was sixteen weeks old she died. I was beyond devastated. I wanted to kill myself and join my little one in the world above. My parents came to me in a dream and assured me that Hao was safe and that I was needed here; and would be reunited with her and with them and with everyone I loved when the time was right. I didn't understand things back then.

I will be honest… when I was alive I rarely thought of anyone but myself… that is until I met you. You were gentle and patient and respectful. You taught me so much about life about love… about myself. After Kim arrived today I saw someone that was the female version of you. I don't mean physically of course but spiritually.

There were many things Ellen loved about Chris. She loved the way he smelled in the morning after shaving. She loved how he would always remember special days like birthdays and anniversaries. She loved how he was practical and emotional at the same time. One thing she loved most about him were his hands.

Some years passed and Vilmas died. Layan quickly joined him… months later. I believe she died of a broken heart. I was now seventeen and alone again. Not long after I was befriended by a man named Minh but he told me to call him the engineer.

There were of course vast differences between the two of you. She was naïve while you were wise. You were scarred while thanks to you she was not. She was always seeing the best in people while you were wise enough to know that some are just snakes. I don't know which is better innocence, wisdom or a combination of both.

Chris's hands were not perfect. They were scarred and very obviously so. It was not nearly as bad as it had been when the incident had first happened. It was still there however. What Ellen loved about Chris's hands were they were so gentle.

The engineer took me to a city I had never been to before. It was called Ho Chi Minh. He gave me a job as a call girl in his 'entertainment house'. He told me to put on the act of being a virgin because, to quote him, 'men pay a lot for virgin ass'. I honestly believed he had my best interest at heart.

Kim told me if it was up to her everyone would be accepted. She explained that she knows what it's like not to be accepted because of being different or not understanding things. She really touched my heart. Just thinking about what she's been through made me cry. It was a real eye-opener.

Ellen forced herself to calm down though she was feeling anything but calm. Would she really end up in heaven? Suicide is a sin after all. Yet, without both parents, Tam could end up in a Bui Doy camp… or worse dead. Kim was determined that Tam would grow up with everything even if that meant giving her life for him. Ellen lost both her parents at age 7 to a firry crash so she knew the feeling of being all alone

"That was where I met Chris. He was gentle and kind. He was the first person who looked into my eyes instead of at my tits. He bought me that night. It was the best thing to happen to me since the birth of Hao.

I know what I did was sinful but it would have been even worse to do anything else. I know that you love me but you and I both know that Kim is your soul mate. Kim has been my friend for 3 hours and she will be my friend forever… at least in my soul… wherever I am. (Hopefully heaven but I am not so blind as to see that my fate is in the hands of one that is higher then me). All I ask is let your heart lead you.

Let your heart lead you was something that Chris always told her before she had to make any sort of decision. In a way it was sort of a joke between them.

"Should I have cereal or a bagel for breakfast"

"Let your heart lead you"

They would both laugh.

Chris noticed that I seemed nervous when we were alone together. He asked me what was wrong and I knew I could trust him. I told him my whole story. I told him everything including Hao and he asked me to move in with him. Immediately I said yes and he made me dinner and we talked all night.

When Kim told me about how patient you were with her, how you waited all the time you did until she was ready… it further amazed me. She told me how you never got mad no matter what. She told me how you would make her laugh. She told me of the promises you made her. She told me of how when she was about to give up it was you that kept her going.

When Kim told Ellen that Chris had been patient it failed to surprise her. Chris had always been patient. Rarely did he ever get mad and when he did he took his aggression out on a bobo doll. Of course by the time he was done she felt bad for the bobo doll. Still at least it wasn't a person.

"On the night that we got married that was the first night we slept together," Kim told Ellen.

Very few things surprised Ellen. That was one of them. Chris bought Kim and then waited until she was ready, to sleep with her… that was beyond what most guys would do, even nice guys.

For my funeral I want the song You'll Be In My Heart played. I would also like daisies as that is my favorite flower. As my pallbearers I would like it to be you and my brothers. I want good memories to be shared. Laughter, no tears do you hear me or I will come back and haunt you (insert laugh here)

Ellen hadraised her brothers since her parents passed away. One was 11 weeks old and one was 4. They had no other family and she knew that if they had gone into foster care there was a chance they could get split up. She was not going to let that happen and so she decided they (her, Paul and Barry) would run away. It worked for awhile too before they got caught but when they did the case worker promised that Ellen and her little brothers would not be split up.

"Chris was not like any other man I met," Kim told Ellen who by that point had already figured it out. "No matter what I did he would make me feel like a princess. I had no doubt that he loved me but one day, in Caleea I found out just how much he did. I had to go shopping that day or I wanted to… I can't remember. Anyway he'd cautioned me to be careful and I was… as careful as I can be anyway.

Sometimes when I used to go outside and take a walk on the beach I would see the perfect shell. I would take that… add it to my collection and make a necklace from it eventually. I have 3 necklaces that I made. I want it to go to my brothers and one to you. That way I'll always be with you and with them.

Ellen and Chris had been married for 18 months and they had only had one fight. It was when Ellen who was in a particular bad mood took a picture Chris had of Kim and tore it up into several little pieces. He was furious with her. He got mad and then 'punished' her using the silent treatment and didn't speak a word to her for 19 days. Those were the worst 19 days of Ellen's adult life.

"I had been at a booth when all of a sudden a man came up to me. He had asked me to give a letter to his 'brother' saying that his 'brother' and him had a horrible fight and his 'brother' wouldn't talk to him. He was hoping this letter would make things better. I had no reason not to believe him so I took the letter and delivered it. Not even 20 seconds later I was arrested for being a traitor."

I will miss you Chris and I will be watch o'er you from wherever I am (hopefully heaven). Make sure to love Kim. I know that's easy for you since you do already. Make sure to love Tam. You'll love him the second you see him; I know I did.

On day 20 Ellen couldn't take it anymore. Chris found her at 3 o'clock in the morning gluing Kim's picture back together. In that very instant he forgave her. He told her he was sorry he'd gotten mad but that was something very special to him. She understood he did what he felt he had to do.

"Thank Goodness Chris was in the bunker. Jon ran and told him what had been happening. He made it all the way to town in record time for the trail. I was found guilty and sentenced to 75 lashes with a cat'o'nine on my unprotected back but Chris wasn't going to allow that to happen. He insisted on taking those lashes in my place."

When Kim told me what you had done for her at Caleea I think my jaw must have dropped to the floor. She told me how they had put tacks in you to keep you still. How the lashes must have burned… and how the tacks must cut. It must have reminded you of the worst day you'd been through, but it was worth it to you because it kept Kim from getting hurt. Now I understand why you got so angry with me for ripping up her picture.

Ellen figured that since Chris was with her now he didn't really need any memories of the past. She had wanted him to forget the pain he'd been through before he'd met her. She was fallible however and did not chose the best way to handle the situation. She thought Kim was just some whore that Chris pitted and made himself love because he felt sorry for her. That couldn't have been further from the truth.

"In horror I was forced to watch as the lashes rained down upon his back. He kept his eyes upon me and kept reassuring me that it was okay. As much as it hurt him, and I know that it did he would never show it. Even after it was over he went forth and took me in his arms reassuring me everything was going to be okay. Most people would have collapsed but not him… he remained strong"

I know I appeared angry that you got mad at me. It wasn't that at all. I felt like you loved her more then you loved me. I didn't understand why. She wasn't real… not to me anyway not until today.

One of the simplest and yet most profound thing Chris ever said is that nothing stays the same. It's true. Like the seasons go round and round and the painted ponies always goes up and down people change as well. Meeting Chris had changed Ellen. Meeting Ellen had changed Chris.

It didn't surprise Ellen that Chris had remained strong. That was Chris. What HAD surprised her was that Chris was the one comforting Kim after Chris had been lashed so severely. How did he find the strength to do that? She found that impressive.

I used to say, I know how hard her life must be, but if it all comes down to her or me… I don't care. I swear I'll fight. We are not however a couple of dogs fighting over who gets the best piece of meat. There is a child involved here and his needs must come first. That's why I did what I did Chris.

Ellen remembered how it took her a week but she finally did manage to glue the picture of Kim back together. When she gave it to Chris his eyes lit up. He was so excited to see the picture. He was pleased with her but that was little consolation. She felt like she was competing with a fling from long ago.

"Thank GOD he did that for me. I didn't know it at the time but I was pregnant with Tam. The lashing would have caused a miscarriage. Right after he had healed up he had to go back to work at the embassy. They shipped out that night and the ambassador sent an order to freeze before I was able to get there. Sometimes it's not a matter of who wins and who loses. Sometimes it's a matter of who needs the prize more. I'm not saying that you're a prize to be won. You're your own person. You're you.

Every time he talked about Kim it was as if he were putting her up on a pedestal. Kim was so bright. Kim had the best ideas. Sometimes Ellen felt like Jan Brady who always said Marsha Marsha Marsha. Instead it was Kim Kim Kim.

"Chris refused to leave but Jon literally pushed him onto the helicopter and the door slammed shut. I still knew that he would come back for me. The night I found out I was pregnant with Tam, I had a dream. He came to me in my dream reassuring me that everything was going to be okay. He told me he couldn't get to me but I needed to find a way to get to him and he would be with me every step of the way."

The words Kim told me you told her in her dream was the very words you wrote in your journal. Now that I am dead and in heaven (hopefully) or hell (hopefully not) it doesn't matter if you know that I read your journal. Chris, you have a family. You need to complete them. You know what I mean.

Ellen wondered why Chris could not go back for Kim. She did not know how hard he had tried. She did not know how many times he applied for a boarding pass and got rejected. Ellen hadn't lived the life that Chris had lived. It made no sense to her.

Unfortunately my pregnancy turned out to be a high risk one. The doctor, a kind Vietnamese who I befriended prescribed bed rest. Getting out of Vietnam back to America was an impossible feat. I had to wait until I delivered him. Several months later I delivered Tam Christopher Scott—the most beautiful baby I laid eyes on since Hao.

I myself had a baby boy when I was a teenager. I decided to give him up for adoption because I couldn't provide for him. He deserved a mother and a father who could provide him love (which I could), but I couldn't provide for him financially and I couldn't provide him a father. That SOB left when I was pregnant with the child. For his sake I cut off all ties with him… that's what his parents wanted.

Ellen was not afraid anymore. She knew that it was going to be okay. Whatever happened she would accept it. She knew Chris and she knew Chris knew her. He'd know her heart.

"The moment I laid eyes on Tam, I knew I loved him. I couldn't believe I was a mother. I saw Hao's soul in Tam. That's why I named him Tam. It means, "I have my baby back in my arms" and for me I really felt like I did"

Recently I learned where my son lives. I wrote him a letter. It's in the envelope on the table. It's already addressed, stamped and sealed. All you need to do is drop it in the mailbox.

She looked at her watch. It was already 5:15. Chris was due home at 6 o'clock. She had 45 minutes until he got home. It was time to finish up the letter and do what she had to do.

"Tam was very sick when he was a baby. For the first year of his life he was too sick to travel. It just was not an option. He would have died. Finally when he was about 18 months he was strong enough to travel.

There is one more thing I need to talk to you about. It's about Buddy. Chris, I know you two had a horrible fight many years ago but I am asking you to forgive him. Everybody deserves a second chance. That's what you always tell me.

She drew in a breath. She was still unsure of what she was doing. Why was she giving her life for someone who until today she hated. It was because she loved her now and she loved Tam. It was just hard for her to understand the sudden change in herself.

I was able to find out where Chris was living. With no money and no resources we snuck on board a boat heading towards New York. It was my only option. The captain of the ship caught us a few days after and when I told him my story he showed great kindness. He told me that a broom closet is no place for me to stay and that he would find us a cabin to stay in.

I KNOW that what Buddy did was wrong but he was like Kim only doing what he thought he had no other choice but to do. If Kim had done that very same thing I know you would have forgiven her without a second thought… probably without a first thought as well. Please understand that in the same way I'm only doing what I feel is right. I can't think of another solution. Please Chris do what I ask you to do.

Ellen could remember back to when she was about 10 years old. She had done something very wrong and felt guilty about it so she had confessed to her adopted parents. She assumed she would be punished for her misdeed but instead her adopted parents praised her for her courage in telling the truth. They told her it was a brave thing to do. When she asked if she was going to be punished they told her that she had already punished herself with the guilt that she'd been feeling.

"The only cabin available was in first class. He said we could not come on board dressed like that and bought us new clothes. He made sure we had 3 square meals a day. When I asked him how I could ever repay him he told me, "by giving this story you're going through a happy ending." He hugged me and wished me luck as the ship docked.

Sometimes you chose your road. Other times your road picks you. I love you now and I will love you forever. Please let your heart lead you.

Yours Forever with love


Ellen stood and climbed to the edge of the balcony. She ignored the protests and took one little step off. She was falling fast but she wasn't afraid. Suddenly it stopped and she found herself bathed in heaven's sunlight. Ellen smiled and allowed herself to be welcomed into her new home.

Meanwhile about 15 minutes later Chris came home. He walked into his apartment and was stunned and delighted to see Kim. After a quick, but joyful reunion Kim first filled Chris in on what had happened and then introduced Chris to his son who was now just waking up from sleep.

"Ellen told me to tell you," she told him, "to go up to the veranda. She told me to tell you that everything will make sense when you get there"

"Stay here with our boy," he told her kissing her quickly, "I will be back shortly"

Chris went up to the veranda and found Ellen's letter. He read it over 3 times. His emotions were mixed. On one hand he was grieved that Ellen, who he did love was gone but in the same sense he was selfishly happy to be able to be with the girl that had his heart.

"I promise Ellen," he said looking up to the heavens, "that everything you asked in your letter will be followed to a tee. I promise that I will always love you and I will never forget you. I love you… my best friend."

So that was why the ambulance was there and the ticker tape. All of a sudden the shock wore off.

Chris walked slowly back into the building and motioned for Kim to follow him.

"Chris is everything alright," she asked in a whispered so Tam wouldn't hear her and be frightened. Wordlessly he handed her the letter. She read it and gasped softly. They clung to each other for what seemed like hours but it must have only been minutes.

"Kim," Chris said after awhile, "Ellen was right. I do love you. She gave herself so that we could be together. We belong together… we need to honor that"

Kim nodded and kissed the man who she finally had in her arms again.

Chris and Tam quickly formed a strong father/son bond. Chris loved his son from the moment he found out he had a son. It took Tam a little while but within hours he was sitting on Chris's lap and calling him daddy. Ellen watched this from heaven and knew she had done the right thing. It was what had to be done.

That night Chris called Buddy up. They talked for hours. At the end of the conversation Chris told Buddy that he had forgiven him for what he did to him. Buddy was relived. He was no longer in the wrong place and more important their friendship was no longer a thing of the past.

Kim and Chris were remarried in a family ceremony. Tam was the best man. Kim's friend was the maid of honor. They honeymooned at Disneyworld because Kim thought Tam would adore that place. She was right about that.

Soon after the honeymoon Kim began getting nauseated. She was losing her energy and would often sleep for hours at a time. Finally Chris insisted Kim go see a doctor. The doctor ran a few tests and determined that Kim was 11 weeks pregnant. Unlike the first two pregnancies this time Kim was a picture of perfect health.

Exactly 7 months and 1 day later little Ellen Hao Scott joined the family. Kim was a little worried about how Tam would react to having a little sister. Hao had been dead when her little brother was born so jealousy was not something that was a concern though she'd have traded the world to have her baby back again. The minute Kim placed Ellen Hao into her brother's arms Tam was fascinated with her. He knew he loved her and he didn't feel jealous or replaced.

A few years later when Ellen Hao was 3 and Kim had just turned 21 Kim started becoming very emotional. The littlest things brought tears to her eyes. She would be fine one moment and the next get hysterical. Chris thought it may be depression.

He insisted she get checked out and after another examination the doctor came out.

"It's called mood swings," the doctor said, "Kim is about 5 months pregnant"

Kim and Chris were delighted. They were going to have another baby. They couldn't wait till it was born.

It turned out to be a he. Their daughter picked the name. Samuel Marcus Scott was welcomed into the world on a cold Spring day. Tam was excited to have a brother but Ellen Hao felt like they loved her less then Tam and the baby. That was all discovered one day when Tam, Ellen Hao and 5 day old Samuel were in the family room.

Kim had passed the room to hear her son talking with his little sister.

"What's wrong Ellie," Tam asked

"Mommy and daddy love you and Sammy more then they love me"

"Ellie you know that's not true," Tam said, "what would make you think that"

"They let you hold Sammy they don't let me for one thing"

"That's just because I'm older then you are. My hands are bigger and it's safer you know?"

"Oh. I guess so"

Samuel started crying having just woken up from his nap.

Kim started to go in but she saw Tam go and get Sammy.

"Ellie," he told her, "sit down on daddy's armchair. I think it's time for Sammy to get to know his big sister"

Kim hadn't noticed Chris standing there till she felt his hands on her shoulders.

"How sweet is that," he whispered as he saw Tam transfer Samuel from his arms to Ellen Hao's arms.

Ellen Hao still got frustrated when she didn't do things as well as her brother but he was always there encouraging her to keep trying, guiding her way. One day a couple of years later Chris and a very pregnant Kim saw Tam and Ellen Hao in the family room again. This time they were alone.

"You're so much better then me at everything," Ellen Hao told her brother.

"Ellie that's not true, I'm just older"

"But you can do all these cool things and I can't yet"

"That's okay. I'll show you how. You'll pick it up soon enough," he promised her.

"Do you still love me," she asked him, "even when I bug you"

"Duh," he told her, "you're my sister and my best friend"

"You say that now," she said, "but what are you going see later when you look at me"
He hugged her.

"I am going to see my sister and my best friend," he told her, "you're always number 1 on my list"

She hugged him back.

Just as Kim and Chris were owing and awing over that Kim's water broke. 29 hours later they welcomes Andrea, Lynn and Helen into the world. Triplets.

"Let's get a picture," Chris said. He placed Andrea in Tam's arms, Lynn in Ellie's arms and he gave Helen to Sammy.

"Okay," he said, "on three say 'family'. One, two, three"

"Family," everyone said together.

Chris looked at his family and nodded. They were a family. Thanks to Ellen they were a family.