Summary: Hermione, Harry, Ron, Fred, George, Ginny plus the game of Twister.
AN: This might be a bit OOC, and takes place after DH with a couple of obvious changes. Mostly, the idea of the Weasley twins playing Twister made me laugh and this came out of it. I hope it makes other people laugh too.
And I want to thank my beta Lisa and her New Year's Eve parties, which partly inspired this story.
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or the game of Twister.
"Right foot green"
With those three words, Hermione suddenly found her face to be irrevocably shoved into a Weasley arse. Which Weasley arse was more difficult to say. She knew immediately that it wasn't Ginny. It also seemed to be a bit thin for Ron. That left her with two identical arses to choose from.
"Urgh," she grunted half in frustration, half in need for fresh air. "Would you kindly get your arse out of my face?"
The arse began to shake. And then the arse began to talk. "Why Hermione, you mean you're not thrilled by this opportunity to gaze at my awesome arse?"
Hermione's response was slightly muffled. "I don't even know whose arse I'm talking to."
"I thought you could tell us apart by now; one of the few people who always can."
There was now laughter all around her. Somehow she knew that Harry would not be using the spinner again anytime soon. In fact, part of her suspected that Harry and Ginny had schemed to make this happen. It had even been Harry's suggestion to play this uniquely muggle game.
"It may come as a surprise to you that memorizing the differences between your and your brother's arses has not been on my list of life goals."
Although, she added to herself, she had been spending a good amount of time admiring the magnificent arse of one Fred Weasley. Of course, his and George's arse look the same, so Hermione also had spent a good amount of time looking at all the differences between them. A few things that always came to mind were: 1) the slightly darker shade of Fred's blue eyes; 2) the small freckle directly below Fred's left eye, which was the only freckle difference between the twins; and 3) the smaller, more mischievous grin of Fred's, compared to George's large and toothy smile.
Hermione felt sure now that her face was fully red. At least the arse in her face was keeping her blush a secret.
"Well, surely memorizing my arse will be at the top of your list now, so the next time we're in this position you won't have to ask."
The laughter had increased by now. Suddenly the unseen pressure off to her right collapsed in a thud of laughter. "This sight is definitely worth losing the game," Ron said. "I have got to take a picture of this."
Hermione's arms were beginning to shake from holding her in this awkward position.
"I'm afraid that it would take more than shoving your arse into my face to suddenly get put at the top of my list."
The arse suddenly stopped shaking. In a smaller voice it asked, "And what would a person have to do to reach the top of your list?"
The room suddenly became quiet.
Hermione realized too late the corner she backed into. She shifted uncomfortably, trying to relieve the weight on her arms and her mind. What should she say?
Hermione looked through her legs at Ginny. Ginny grinned and gave her a nod of encouragement. Yes, she and Harry definitely had planned this.
Well, what did she want to say? She rolled her eyes, that question was easy enough to answer. Hermione had known Fred Weasley for nine years before realizing that he possessed every single quality that she could want. And she supposed that when an opportunity like this is presented you should take it.
"You would have to see me as more than a know-it-all or as Ron's ex-girlfriend.
You would have to be understanding and patient, especially when I stay up all night reading and working.
You would have to bring a sense of humor to me, and force some fun free time upon me even when I try to refuse it.
You would have to trust me and be trustworthy; be someone I can lean on through the hard days and celebrate with through the great ones.
You would have to be fiercely loyal to your friends and family, which is perhaps the quality I value most after everything that's happened."
During the pause that followed there was a flash of light from Ron's camera. And from the arse's silence, she suddenly knew that it was Fred's arse in front of her. And she did what any woman would do in that position. She tackled him, knocking over everyone else in the process.
From her position on top of his stomach, Hermione asked, "Fred Weasley, will you go out with me tomorrow night?"
Fred grinned. His lips descended upon hers in a soft first kiss. "Love, I thought you'd never ask."