AN= Please don't kill me! But inspiration and my muse, Clio, decided I needed two more stories, and as such, stole my ideas for this one, and replaced it with ideas for two more stories. Okay, im sorry this took so long! And Im sorry its so short, too. ;[

And I apologise for mistakes! I don't have a beta or anything, so all the mistakes are mine. Nothing else but the plot and Sevvie's sexy image is, though.

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Severus was waiting nervously outside the doors of the Great Hall. He could hear chattering and laughter inside, and it did not sound the least bit appealing. He wanted to go back to his Potions Laboratory. Thinking, he decided that wasn't a bad idea. He slowly started to slink into the shadows towards the dungeon entrance, hoping to get away before that blubbering lemon-drop-loving nitwit turned up. He was so close, so close… And then a flash of icy blue-white light hit him, and he was paralyzed. He heard a chuckle, and his onyx eyes narrowed. He could practically FEEL the damn old fool's eyes twinkling. Then, he heard a cheery voice say,

" Where on Earth could you want to be going to, Maximus?"

" Oh, I wonder…" Maximus replied icily.

Severus Snape had come up with a rather good alias, he thought. He was now Maximus Frigo Umbra Chiroptera. Quite undignified, true, he could only hope that nobody thought to replace Frigo with that awful muggle excuse for chocolate frogs*. But it was very fitting. Cold Shadow Bat, indeed. And he just couldn't resist Maximus. It was what he had planned to call any children or pets he may have had, if he had lived a different life. He decided that his parents would be Greek, but had migrated to Australia. How else could he explain such an unusual name? But Max was anything but normal, and so it was decided. It was hard for him not to wear his customary black robes, but he had substituted with a pair of black jeans, a black v-neck shirt and a black leather jacket, with black boots. They had decided to change his appearance, but only very slightly. They had given him a normal nose, but had left him otherwise the same. His eyes were still ebony, his skin still had its unbelievable pallor. His hair was sleek, no longer greasy, and remained midnight black, but it was now pulled back with a leather band and his hair was parted, ever so slightly, to the side. A small bit of fringe was hanging out of the pony-tail. In other words, he was, to use common slang, HOT. Well, not that Max thought that. He just thought he was the same, but smaller. He almost was. But the thing was, he'd brought his fitness with him. He'd always been fit. How could you be a spy and not? But he'd liked to cover it up, after hearing some of the 7th Years drooling over him. Tall, Dark, and Fit, apparently.

" Well, no time for a little excursion now, the Hall and the Sorting Hat are waiting!"

" I believe I still do not see the need for a re-sorting. I was Head Of Slytherin, it should be obvious. A younger age does not have an effect on personality traits."

"But I tell you again, Severus, that we sort too young. I have always wanted to put the hat on your head now you have a matured mind and see which house would be appropriate. Now, we have kept them waiting long enough."

With that, they strode towards the Hall entrance. On the threshold, however, just before they entered, Albus turned his head, and said,

" Just as a forewarning, I have persuaded the Hat to speak aloud its musing as he tries to find your place."

And with that, he strode into the hall. Though he did stride quite a bit faster than normal, expecting the repercussions of such an act.

"ALBUS!!!" He yelled, running after the twinkling headmaster, and pulled his wand from his sleeve, and cast a spell.

"EXPECTO PATRONUM!" When the hippogriff appeared, he quickly instructed it to trip the headmaster over.

The shadowed grey hippogriff shot towards Dumbledore, who had turned to watch with an eyebrow raised. Realizing that it was shooting towards him, he attempted to move out of the way, but couldn't move fast enough. The patronus barreled into him, pushing him over and then picked up his wand in his beak. He took the wand back to Max, before disappearing. Smirking, Max, stepped up and around the Headmaster, while saying,

"Bet your regretting that idea now, Albus?"

Before strolling up to the stool, twirling his wand, with Dumbledore's wand poking out of his pocket.

The Entire school was staring, jaws hanging open, eyes wide. Who could this daring, devil-may-care, GORGEOUS teen male be? AND not only that, he had addressed the head of the school as ALBUS, conjured a Patronus, and DISARMED one of the most powerful wizards alive! By now, most of the girls, and even some of the guys, were drooling. Not to mention, those black pants were TIGHT!

By now, Dumbledore had returned to his feet, and Max was at the front of the hall, near the Staff Table, waiting for the Headmaster. When Dumbledore reached the front, he began to speak.

" Well, that was quite the entrance, wasn't it? But that is nothing for one of the most powerful wizards I've ever known."

AT that, Max glared and threatened,

" I still have your wand, Dumbles!"

Dumbledore chuckled before continuing.

Incidentally, that was quite a creative use of a Patronus."

At this, Max interrupted again.

" Well, I had to do something you wouldn't figure out, didn't ?"

" Yes my boy. But I believe your patronus has changed? What happened to Lily?"

At that Max's face darkened, and his posture straightened and stiffened.

"Nothing, Albus. But it is no business of yours." He had returned to seriousness.

"Oh, I am sorry, Frigo. Please forgive me. But now, we really must get on with getting you SORTED!!!"

When Dumbledore shouted 'SORTED', a tatty, brown wizard's hat was summoned into the hall. And said hat began to talk.

"Well, well, well. I'd never think I'd see you again. What happened?"

"Albus here insisted that I be re-sorted."

The Lemon drop-lover chuckled.

"And now, I think he thinks I might be a… Gryffindor!"

" Objection, Max! I was Godric's hat, you know."

" Of course, I forgot you were biased. My apologies. What I meant was, I think he thinks you are stupid enough to put me in Gryffindor."

" Max! You do possess Gryffindor traits"

" As interesting as this conversation is, we are at the front of the Great Hall and we must get the Sorting done."

And with that he directed Max onto the stool, and placed the Hat on his head.

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Reviews appreciated! XD