Thanks for all of the responses, guys!
STAR DESTROYER. EXACTOR. DARTH VADER'S SITTING ROOM. PRESENT DAY.
Darth Vader sat in his sitting room with Luke, Leia, Han, Chewbacca, Yoda, and Obi-Wan. It was a reunion, one he did not enjoy so far.
"Hey, dad! Check this out!"
Vader turned his attention to his 25 year old son, Luke, who was currently practicing his lightsaber combinations.
Luke, satisfied that he had his father's attention, whipped out his lightsaber and destroyed the lightsaber stimulation probe droid in front of him. He turned off the lightsaber and grinned happily.
"It didn't even have time to shoot at me!" He added excitedly.
Vader sighed inwardly. "Good job, Luke," he said, trying to sound enthusiastic.
Leia, Vader's 25 year old daughter, scowled at Luke. "Oh? Check this out!"
She whipped out her own lightsaber, and destroyed the three lightsaber stimulation probe droids postioned around her. None of them had the time to fire, either.
She deactivated her blade and smirked. "Take that!"
Vader, amused at his daughter's growing skill, clapped. "That was most impressive, Leia. You are indeed becoming powerful."
Luke was hurt at Vader's rejection. "What about me?" He pouted.
Vader raised an eyebrow, knowing full well that no one could see the action. "You would be able to perform the same thing if you do not waste your time flying around with Captain Solo and Chewbacca." He glanced at the pair, who was suddenly interested in their beverages.
Luke laughed nervously. "Good point," he mumbled, and motioned for another droid.
Yoda, who was watching the exchange between father and son, agreed with Vader. "To your father, you must listen."
Obi-Wan nodded in agreement.
Vader smiled triumphantly. It wasn't often that his former Jedi Masters agreed with him on anything.
Leia sighed and sat down next to Vader, who finally relxed enough to lounge on his furniture instead of sitting stiffly. She laid her head on his chest, much to his surprise.
Vader raised his eyebrows in amusement. Rarely did Leia ever show affection. Especially to him.
"Why the sudden show of affection?" He inquired curiously.
Leia frowned and started to lift herself off. "You don't want me to?"
Vader frowned. "You may do as you wish."
Leia laid her head back to it's previous resting place.
Luke sighed and deactivated his lightsaber. "Okay, time for the fun part on this.....party." He looked around him, not sure if he should have called the gathering a 'party'.
Obi-Wan frowned. "Luke, you better not......"
Luke grinned, his blue eyes glittering mischeviously. "Time to check dad's holo-mail!"
Vader, who was absently stroking his daughters hair, suddenly came to attention. He glared at Luke, cursing Palpatine again for putting him in this suit. "Luke......"
Luke already was seated at the computer and logged onto his father's holo-mail. Using the Force, he discovered the password and typed it in.
"I'm in!" Luke said excitedly.
Vader groaned. "Great, now I have to change my password. Again," he complained, glancing at Han, who blushed sheepishly.
"Now look, your Dark Lordiness, but that was a one time thing!" Han defended himself.
Vader held his hand up. "Once is more than enough, Captain Solo."
Luke sighed. "Would please stop it? Both of you!"
"Fine," Han grumbled.
"As you wish," Vader said.
Luke grinned. "Okay, since it wouldn't be a reunion without fun, we can answer some fan's questions!"
Leia grimaced. "Great.
Luke grinned and opened the first holo-mail. "This is for Leia...." He said, reading the questions, then clasped his hand over his mouth and doubled over in laughter.
Leia furrowed her eyebrows and lifted herself up from her father's chest. "What?" She said as she walked over to the screen. She started reading, and then her complexion turned a very bright pink.
Han did the same as Leia once he read the holo-mail as well. "Um, can we...uh, skip that one?"
Luke shook his head. "Nope! All dares, truths, and questions have to be followed through."
Han muttered a string of profanity.
Obi-Wan and Yoda also read the holo-mail, and broke into a fit of laughter.
Vader frowned. "What is it?" He said as he started to walk over to everyone else was sitting.
Leia and Han blocked his view from the screen.
"Daddy, you do not need to read it," Leia said.
Vader crossed his arms over his chest. "And pray, tell me why I cannot read my own holo-mail."
Leia and Han exchanged looks.
Luke wiped tears from his eyes. "Well, if you two won't let dad read it, I'll read it out loud!"
Vader smirked in satisfaction and went back to his beloved place on his couch. "Continue."
"This is from general-joseph-dickson. Question one is for Leia: 'What age did you lose your virginity?'"
Vader whipped his glance to Luke. He waited for the other questions.
"Question two: 'Have you ever done Voyer or BDSM?'"
Vader willed himself not to strangle anyone in the room.
"And final question!" Luke laughed with glee. "'When did you first have sex with Han?'"
Everyone turned to look at Vader, except Han and Leia, who were suddenly interested in their shoes.
Vader clenched his fist and calmed himself as best as he could. "Leia," he rasped. "Answer the questions."
Leia blushed. Han did the same.
Luke grinned. "You have to be honest!"
Leia took a deep breath. "Fine! No, I did not do Voyer or BDSM!"
Obi-Wan grinned. "You still have two questions left."
Leia sighed. "I lost my virginity when I was 21."
Vader's face turned pale white, even though no one could see it.
"And, the first time I had....sex....with Han was indeed on our way to Bespin."
Vader took a deep breath and willed himself not to go overboard. "Is that all?" He squeaked.
Luke nodded. "Yep. That's all."
Vader nodded. "Good." He turned his gaze to Han and pointed at him. "You, Captain Solo, will come with me!"
Han widened his eyes. "Your Dark Lordiness, let's not get hasty...."
Vader ignored his pleas and grabbed Han by the ear and led him out into the corridor. Five minutes later, both came back. Han was gasping for air, and Vader looked suspiciously innocent.
"Next holo-mail, Luke," he said, surprisingly cheerful.
Luke chuckled. "Okay....."
He opened the next page and started reading it. He laughed. "Okay Yoda. One is for you...And all of these are from gamefreek321."
"'Why do you talk backwards?'" Luke read aloud.
Yoda shrugged. "Cool sounding, it is."
Everyone murmured their agreement.
"The next one is for you, Obi-Wan."
Obi-Wan grinned. "Ask away. I have no fear."
Luke read it over and laughed. "Oh, I think you will be once you-know-who hears the question."
Vader, who was polishing his lightsaber, looked up. "What?" He asked, since everyone was looking at him.
Obi-Wan. "Go ahead, Luke."
"'Did you ever fall in love with Padme?'" Luke read aloud.
Obi-Wan paled. "Uhhh....."
Vader looked at him expectantly. "What is your answer, Kenobi?"
Obi-Wan cringed. "Maybe...for a little bit."
Vader shrugged. "Just as long you didn't have an affair with her, I'm fine with it."
Obi-Wan grimaced. "Well......"
Vader growled at him.
Obi-Wan laughed and held up his hands. "I'm just kidding!"
Vader nodded in satisfaction. "Good."
Luke grinned. "The last one's for you, dad."
Vader waved his hand dismissivly. "Ask, Luke. There is no need to hesitate. I will be honest, no matter what."
Luke raised his eyebrows. "The question is: 'Would you consider yourself a good father?'"
"Yes," came Vader's immediate reply.
Luke frowned. "Does cutting off my hand count?"
"And torturing me on the Death Star?" Leia chimed in.
Vader sighed. "Every parent has their flaws," he defended. He looked to Han. "You are not one of my children."
Han shrugged. "So?"
Vader sighed. "Well, I answered my question. Next." He waved his hand dismissivly.
Luke sighed and opened a new page. "This one is for Leia."
Leia groaned. "Great!"
Luke glanced at her. "It isn't a bad one."
Leia looked relieved, and so did Vader. "Thank the Force," he muttered.
Luke rolled his eyes. "This is from Jedi Master Misty Sman-Esay. 'When did you find out you were adopted?'"
Leia shrugged. "When you told me that your father was Mr. Dark Side, here." She pointed to Vader. "And then you told me you were my brother, so obviously Bail wasn't my true father."
Vader nodded, satisfied.
Luke grinned. "Good answer!"
He opened another page and paled as he read it.
Leia frowned. "What is it, Luke?"
Luke motioned for her to come read the holo-mail. "Read that."
She laughed at him. "Have fun explaining that one to you-know-who."
Vader furrowed his eyebrows. He had a bad feeling about this.
Luke cleared his throat. "Let's start with the questions first. The first one is for dad."
"These are from Dawnmist11. 'Do you ever regret turning to the Dark Side?'"
"No," Vader said.
Luke frowned. "Why not?"
Vader glanced at him. "Because I am happy with my life."
Luke shrugged. "Okay. Next one is for Ben. 'Have you ever been in love?'"
Obi-Wan blushed. "Yes."
Vader was intrigued. "Oh?"
Obi-Wan glared at him. "None of your business."
Vader tried not to laugh. "Fine. You win." For now, he added silently.
Luke sighed. "And this one's a dare…..for me."
Han grinned. "Finally!"
Luke grimaced. "Would someone else read it out loud, please?"
Obi-Wan raised his hand. "I will." He went over to the computer and read the dare. He laughed. "Okay, Luke. Your dare is to tell Vader about the time you kissed your sister."
Vader shrugged. "And this is a horrible dare because…..?"
Luke grimaced again. "It wasn't, exactly a brotherly kiss……"
Vader had no idea what he was talking about. "Elaborate."
Leia sighed. "The type of kiss you would use on mother when you are in the…….mood."
Vader paled and clenched his fist. "That is cleared up for me, Leia. Thank you."
Vader turned his attention to Luke. "Why in sith hell would you do such a thing?"
"It was on Hoth! I didn't know you were my father then! Let alone knowing Leia was my sister!" Luke defended himself.
Vader shook his head ruefully. "What did your guardians teach you?" He mumbled. "Next."
Luke sighed. "You can read the rest, Ben."
Obi-Wan nodded and opened another holo-mail. "These are from sheilacool2. The first question is for Luke. 'How's that relationship with your dad going?'"
Luke shrugged. "Um, I guess okay?" He looked at Vader questioningly.
"What are you looking at?" Vader asked curiously.
"I'm asking you to kinda help me out here!" Luke said.
Vader allowed himself a small smile. "It is not my question, Luke."
Luke narrowed his eyes at his father. "Fine."
Obi-Wan glanced at Luke. "What is your answer, young one?"
Luke sighed. "I guess my relationship with dad is going okay."
Obi-Wan nodded. "The next question is for Leia. 'Do you really like kissing smugglers?'"
Vader instantly came to attention.
Leia grinned and touched Han's face lovingly. "Only this smuggler."
Han grinned back and started to inch towards her.
Vader glared at both of them. "Leia Skywalker, you should be informed that your father is still present. I suggest you do not do such an action when I am near."
Han and Leia quickly turned back to their original postions. "Yes, father," Leia mumbled.
Vader nodded, satisfied in her answer.
Obi-Wan chuckled. "The last question is for Vader. 'Have you kissed any other girl besides Padme? And if so, how did you do it since you have the mask?'"
Vader glared at Obi-Wan. "What kind of question was that?!"
Obi-Wan shrugged. "I didn't ask it, Vader."
Vader sighed. "No, I did not. The only females I have ever shown any kind of affection to was Padme and my mother."
Leia narrowed her eyes at Vader. "Ach-hem."
Vader glanced at her. "And my daughter."
Obi-Wan nodded and opened another holo-mail. "These are from Seirei Nightlord05. The first one is for Luke. 'What do you think of Han? As a friend or much more?'"
Luke glanced at Han. "I think of him as my brother."
Vader hissed. "You better not…."
Han grinned and nodded. "Same here, kid."
"The next one is also for Luke. 'Do you truly have a crush on Leia?'" Obi-Wan read aloud.
Luke recoiled. "Ew, no. She's my sister."
Leia grinned. "Thank you!"
"The next is for Han. 'Do you have any brothers or sisters?'"
Han looked down at his shoes. "No."
Obi-Wan nodded. "And the last one is also for Han. 'Why don't you believe in the Force?'"
Han shrugged. "It's just a little far-fetched for me."
Vader disagreed. "What would you call this, Captain Solo?" He used the Force to lift the couch Han was sitting on.
"Whoa!" Han was taken by surprise.
Vader kept the couch in the air. "Well?" He demanded.
"Okay, that's pretty weird. But it won't make me believe in this all-power Force that surrounds everything." He shrugged again. "It's just my opinion."
Vader set down the couch only because his daughter was also sitting on it. "I will accept that answer."
Luke checked his wrist-chrono. "It's getting pretty late, guys. Maybe we should continue this tommorrow…."
Everyone murmured their agreement.
Leia grinned at Vader. "Perhaps you could convince your Master to join us!"
Vader pursed his lips, strongly disagreeing. "I will suggest it to him, but do not get your hopes up."
"See ya tommorrow, everybody!" Luke called as each person filed out of Darth Vader's quarters.
Leia and Luke hugged their father. "See you tommorrow, dad," they said at the same time.
Vader nodded and embraced his children quite hesitantly. He still was not fully adjusted to having his children with him.
Luke left for his own quarters, while Leia paused at the door.
Vader crossed his arms over his chest. "What?"
Leia looked at him, her brown eyes causing him to remember Padme yet again.
"I-I love you, dad," she said, then left, shutting the door behind him.
She left behind a very confused Dark Lord of the Sith who was at a loss for words.
How did you guys like the first chapter?! Was it good, bad, or ugly?
XD Please continue sending in your questions (and dares) for the Star Wars characters.
Next chapter I'm adding Emperor Palpatine to the mix, so don't forget our beloved Emperor!