Disclaimer: I do not own Saiyuki, the character Ni Jianyi or any of the happy bunny material.

Author's Note: Heheh. I couldn't help it. It was fun. My friends and I were being random and we thought of Ni Jianyi and his bunny obsession. It was a spur of the moment thing. Don't you just love happy bunny.

'HB Quote'

"Ni talking"


Ni Jianyi vs. Happy Bunny

Ni Jianyi walked into the store on a whim. He had no need to go inside, but he saw something shaped like a bunny so he just had to pop in and see what it was. He stood in front of a wall covered with Happy Bunny stickers and accessories. He read the quotes aloud.

'Hi, loser.'

"Rude little…"

'You're pretty…ugly."

Ni Jianyi ignored the last word and read on.

'Let's talk about what we could do for me."

"Well, I can do many things to you. I can do this and that, oh, and my favorite thing…" I won't disturb you mentally with the details…I'll let your minds wander for a moment.

'I like it sloppy and weird.'

"That's refreshing."

'I'm bad and you love it.'

"So true," he hummed.

'Bet you love my thingy.'

"Yes. I. Do."

'It's cute how you think I'm listening.'

"Aww~ You think I'm cute…huh, wait…"

'I just realized, I don't care.'

"What?"

'I know how you feel, I just don't care.'

"You little…"

'Hey! Suck a butt.'

"What the?!"

'I hate you so bad. Hating you makes me warm inside.'

"You could try being nicer," he screamed.

'I'll be nicer.'

"Thank you."

'When you're smarter.'

"And here I am trying not to be mean."

'You're not mean, you're just a sissy."

"What did you just call me?!"

'Not listening."

"You better start!"

'Make the stupid people shut up.'

Ni Jianyi turned red. Was he embarrassed or mad? Eh, who cares, this is fun.

'I have a dream, and in it, something eats you.'

"Why would you say something like that?"

'You're anger makes me happy.'

"You're an evil little bastard."

'You're ugly and that's sad.'

"I'm leaving."

'Whatever, you moron.'

Ni Jianyi turned around and walked to the door.

'You go girl and don't come back.'

Ni Jianyi froze for a moment and opened the door.

'Have a nice day you worthless turd.'

Ni Jianyi was gone and out of sight.

'Crazy doesn't even begin to cover it.'

THE END


A/N: I know…it's horrible, but the urge was too great and I couldn't resist. T_T Don't kill me in my sleep…or when I am awake…or when I'm not looking…You know what, just don't kill me at all.