She found him in his godfather's room. He was sitting on Sirius' bed looking so intensely at something that he didn't hear her coming. Walking in tentatively she gave him a sleepy smile when he looked up.
"I thought you were asleep." He returned her smile and shifted so she could sit next to him.
"I was." She murmured and sat down to look at what he was holding.
It was a photograph. In it a little boy, no more then 2 with messy black hair and glasses flew on a little toy broom. "That's you, isn't it Harry?"
"Ah-ha." A soft smile played on his lips.
Hermione watched Harry watching himself in the photo for a bit. Something shimmered in his eyes as he bit at his lower lip. "He looks so happy doesn't he?" He whispered, referring to himself in the picture.
She looked from him back to the little boy and felt her own eyes prick as she watched the little boy laugh madly as the little broom lifted him a few inches of the ground. Looking back at him she spoke again. "No scar."
"No scar." He agreed then fell silent again and put the photo down.
Reaching out she took his hand between both of hers and held it tight even when he stiffened slightly. "Harry, please talk to me."
He sighed. "Hermione…"
"No, Harry I know this is hard for you." She picked her words carefully. "I know that you don't feel comfortable sharing these things with other people. But I'm not other people; I'm your best friend." She took a shaky breath. "I want to be here for you."
For a moment she thought that he was going to ask her to leave. He was looking at her so strangely. But he didn't ask her to leave; instead he reached up and caressed her cheek. Part nerves, part relief made her let out a breathless laugh but it was short lived as at that moment he leaned closer and kissed her.
The kiss was like nothing she had ever experienced. Sure she had been kissed before, but the gentlemanly pecks from Viktor did not prepare her for this. Cupping her face in his large hands Harry deepened the kiss, tipping his head to get closer, shifting so he could touch her more. And she welcomed him.
"Harry?" She murmured against his mouth when he drew back slightly.
"Hermione." He returned roughly. "I need you." He captured her bottom lip between his teeth and gently sucked till she quivered. "Make me forget. Just for a little while."
"Forget?" Her mind was spinning seeming to grow more dull as her lower body heated and throbbed with need. "Forget me?"
"No. No, no, no, never you. Need you." He wasn't thinking straight either apparently but as his hands slid under her blouse and pulled the flimsy silk over her head, she didn't care. "No prophesy no Voldermort, no Boy-who-lived."
"Oh." Was all she could manage as he pulled back and pulled his own shirt over his heads to reveal a surprisingly muscular chest and arms. She knew that she fancied Quiditch players for a reason. But still something in her mind scrapped against the wall of her sanity. There was something that she should be thinking about, something that she should be doing or maybe saying…?
He pushed her back onto Sirius Black's bed and covered her with his larger body. "First time?" He asked pushing her skirt up her thighs.
"Yes." That was what she had been trying to remember… Was it?
"Me too." Or was it that? His mouth made a hot, wet trail down her throat and his hand cupped her breast, groaning as her nipple tightened against his palm.
"Are you sure…"
"I think I'd remember if I'd done this before." He said hastily and reached between them to pull her panties to the side and flick open the button holding together his pants. "Please let me." He whispered shoving her thighs wider with his knees before lowering himself so that his erection pushed against her ready opening. "Need this. Need to feel good. Need to feel..."
And with that he gripped her hips and forced his cock inside, mouth wide and eyes shut tight. His entrance was rough and Hermione whimpered when his long, thick cock broke through her virginity and stretched her wide. She wasn't really ready for him but he held himself deep and whispered into her ear as her body adjusted.
"You feel so good. Hot and tight around me." He moaned and slowly withdrew only to slowly push back inside and she could feel her arousal growing again. "Fuck, he told me this would feel better then anything else, but… Ooh your getting so slick." He moaned again and began to thrust long and deep.
His words were getting her hotter then she ever thought possible and his thrusting body and guttural moans just drove her higher. She'd heard girls giggling about and talking about the boys they let touch them, let inside them, but none of them had felt this way. She was sure of it.
All at once he gripped her hips and fucked her hard and fast into the mattress. The sheets were old and dusty under her bare back and around the walls she could see pictures of muggle women in various states of wanton need. And she revelled in the fact that she was now one of them, one of those women who knew what it was to be well and truly fucked by the man she loved.
At that last thought her eyes flew wide but Harry was close. His moans filled her world and the fact that it was her that made him feel this way made her fingers dig into his back and her thighs wrap around his bucking hips, giving him deeper access.
Every deep stroke of his cock brought her closer to the completion that she had only felt on her own. His name escaped her lips over and over and he moaned in response, pumping harder, faster till with his mouth wide he shuddered and spilled his seed in a series of gasping pulses.
Hermione couldn't take her eyes of his face. His eyes were glazed over and his gasping mouth was upturned in an expression of the deepest kind of pleasure. It was quite simply the most erotic moment of her life and as he rubbed and thrust out the last few spasms of his orgasm she let out a shocked, "Oh!" as her own orgasm flooded her mind and body.
Over the next few weeks the two formed an unspoken new relationship. They were there for each other to forget the world around them, if only for a few moments. They explored every position, tasted every inch of the other's flesh and found so many new and exciting ways to please each other.
All the while Hermione never confessed her deeper feelings or the fact they seemed to be growing with each encounter, singing with every heated look and blatantly refusing to acknowledge the obvious fact that she was his fuck buddy and friend, but nothing more.
Christmas Eve at the Weasley house was always a loud and often dangerous event. But it added an extra thrill to the secret that Harry and Hermione held. She almost screamed when Harry's arm flicked out of nowhere and dragged her underneath his invisibility cloak.
She opened her mouth to admonish his recklessness but he placed a single finger over her lips and she felt herself melt at the mischievous grin that was all James. She couldn't help but return the smile and opened her lips to take his finger into her hot depths.
At length he pulled back, breathing hard and pulled her through the crowd of talking, arguing redheads and up the stairs to the room he shared with Ron. Her heart thudded hard against her chest. Did this mean that he wanted to make love in a bed again. They hadn't used a bed since the first time.
"Harry, you are in so much trouble." She purred and pushed him towards his single bed. Her confidence was on high and she planned to enjoy it. "I'm going to punish you so hard…"
"Whoa," he breathed and gently extricated himself. "Wait, Hermione We have to talk, or more I have something that I need to tell you."
For a moment a shiver of awareness made her pause, but there was no mistaking the way his wide green eyes smiled into hers. Her heart jumped and flipped. Was this it? Did he feel the way she felt? It was all she could do to contain the bubbling, joyful giggle that was rising in her throat.
He took her hands in his and they sat down on his bed together. "I – um…" He cleared his throat. "I'm not exactly sure how you're going to react when I say this."
Concern rose again as she looked into his face. His expressions shifted and shadowed to fast for her to decipher. She saw excitement and happiness, but also nervousness and possibly fear?
Trying for a comforting and understanding expression she gripped his hands tighter. "Tell me Harry. You know that you can trust me with anything, don't you?"
"I do." He smiled and it was like sunshine. "Hermione I_"
The door suddenly flew open and Ron bounded in, swearing and holding a bloody cloth around his arm. "Bloody hell, there you are!" He bellowed holding out his injured arm. "Hermione you have to heal this before mum sees, If she knows I was testing that curse Snape invented, she'll tear me a new arse."
Dinner was even more frustrating then the long day spent avoiding each others eyes and trying to act as though they weren't thinking about ducking into the nearby pantry for a quick session of touching and snogging. Ron had pretty much broken the mood and Hermione had nodded reluctantly when Harry mouthed that they would talk later, over Ron's shoulder.
The table was beautifully decorated with holly, candy-canes and tiny pretend presents wrapped with gold and silver paper and bright red and green bows. Above the chatting, laughing family candles danced and sang Christmas carols. But it was all lost on Hermione. Her gaze kept flicking to Harry who seemed engrossed in conversation with Charlie. He laughed and nodded then nudged him with his elbow. She wondered what they were talking about.
The night went on, the clock ticking so slowly that more then once Hermione wondered if it had actually stopped. She jumped when Molly suddenly clicked her spoon against the wine glass, signalling that she had something to say.
Molly stood and grinned widely around at her family, her cheeks rosy with the wine she had been drinking like it was water. "Well here we are, another Christmas for the Weasley family-" She gave Harry long a meaningful look. "-And soon to be family."
Hermione looked from Molly to where Harry sat between Charlie and Ginny. Her stomach dropped and the world began to spin as she watched Ginny smiling like she'd just single-handedly won the Quiditch Cup. Ginny giggled and gripped Harry's arm and he grinned right back at her.
All at once it was too much. Hermione couldn't listen to any more. She knew what was coming. What Harry had been trying to tell her. It felt like a knife twisting in her heart. Harry was going to marry Ginny. Every touch, every shared moment between them had meant nothing. She had simply been a vessel for him while he waited for the woman he loved to be ready. With a strangled sob, she pushed back her chair, jumped to her feet and ran from the room.
When Harry tentatively knocked on the door to her guest room, Hermione was throwing clothes and books into her trunk. "What!"
"Hermione?" He pushed open the door just enough to poke his head around. "Are you alright?"
"Do I blood well look alright?" She snapped and threw another book into her trunk. "Go away Harry."
"But Hermione… I thought that you'd be happy for me." He slipping into the room and closed the door behind him. Sitting down on the edge of his bed, his voice shook. "I thought we were friends."
If his words hadn't been so hurtful they would have been laughable. "I'm going to forget you said that." She had to work hard to hold her composure and threw her pink woollen cardigan with the rest of her things.
"Well, what am I supposed to think?" He returned, throwing his hands into the air. "This is about the second most amazing thing to ever happen to me and your behaving like a spoilt child."
Her eyes flew to him and she couldn't hide her hurt any more. Her tears fell freely as she sobbed and fell to the bed. How could he not know how she felt? Did he think that she just gave herself so easily to all the men in her life?
"Hermione?" He wasn't angry any more and she sobbed again as he pulled her into his arms. "Are… Are you jealous?"
She pulled away sharply. "Arsehole!" She screamed without thinking. "You – You complete and utter bastard! How dare you ask me that."
"It's a perfectly legitimate question!" He was angry again. "Look I know that you did what you had to do to protect your parents. But just because you miss them that's no excuse to begrudge me a family."
"What!?" She blustered. "You leave my parents out of this; they have no part in this conversation. And I never said that you couldn't have a family!" She slapped the lid of her trunk shut. "Go for it, marry your perfect sweetheart. I hope you have lots and lots of equally perfect redheaded children."
Grabbing her trunk she headed for the door but Harry was faster. "Whoa, whoa!" He stood arms out stretched in front of the door.
"Harry, I don't want to hex you, but I will." She pulled her wand. "Move out of my way and let me go."
"No and you aren't going to hex me."
"Pretty sure of that Potter."
He grinned roguishly and shrugged. "Yeah, pretty sure. What kind of women hexes her best friend so soon after he's adopted by a loving redheaded family."
She shook her head. What was he on about now? "Adopted?"
"By the Weasley's."
She put the wand away and punched him in the shoulder. "Why the hell didn't you tell me that earlier?"
"Ouch!" He rubbed his arm. "Well, I was nervous."
"About this!" He yanked a little black box from his robes. It was tied with an intricate red bow.
"What – What is it." She stuttered, trying hard to keep her composure and definitely not wanting to get her hopes up again only to have them dashed.
He looked down at the box and back at her. "It was my mums, you know before…" His nose wrinkled and he swallowed hard. "I was going to ask you during dinner."
"Ask me?" Her mouth went dry. "Ask me what?"
He pulled the red ribbon from the box and slowly opened it before her eyes to reveal a perfect gold ring holding a cluster of tiny diamonds.
"I've known since the moment we first touched. What I wanted, how I felt about you."
"Why didn't you say anything?" She asked, entranced by the perfect ring, not quite believing it even as he slipped the gold band onto her finger.
"Why didn't you?"
She gave a watery laugh and moved willingly into his arms, both sitting back on the bed and simply holding one another.
"I love you." He said, his voice gruff.
"I love you."
"Merry Christmas." He murmured into her hair and let her sweet scent wash over him.
"Are you planning to repeat everything I say?" Finally with a single finger under her chin he tipped her face up and kissed her.
When he pulled back she was smiling, glowing with all her being. "Are you planning to repeat everything I say?"