A.N – This is my first HP fic that I've ever had the courage to post. It's based on the song, Notice Me, by an amazing band called 'The Shower Scene'. Go check out their myspace, they're amazing. I love them to bits. WARNINGS: Post OOTP/Pre HBP, HP/GW, Angst.
J.K. Rowling owns Harry Potter, the books, etc. Warner Brothers own the film versions. The Shower Scene (Eoghan, Goc, Mikey, Ally) own the song, Notice Me. I own…well…nothing.
Harry Potter stared out his bedroom window, looking out on the garden of number 4, Privet Drive. It was a dark evening, but warm. The mysterious fog that had been around all summer was still there, still stifling. The weather was worse than ever, a shock after the heat wave last summer.
Harry was there, hoping, wishing. He had received a letter from Professor Dumbledore the weekend before, saying that he was to be taken to The Burrow for the remainder of the holidays. He didn't exactly mind this, it was preferable to being Dudley's punching bag for the next two weeks.
And he'd be near Ginny.
It wasn't like Harry to get sentimental, but seeing Hermionie's tears last year, as she and Ron grew further apart, was hurting him. He didn't want to see her hurt, so he couldn't be with her. The chances of him dying weren't exactly few and far between. But he always wondered, did she notice him?
Did she notice him, as he passed out on her couch several times, underneath the dim lights? Did she notice him as he left her room after saying goodnight to Hermione? He doubted it, doubted she'd want to notice him. She had Dean now, and Dean wasn't in danger of getting himself killed. Dean also had stable mental health, Harry was still grieving for Sirius, much as he tried to deny it.
The thoughts of Ginny kept going around his head, his brain was infected with the thoughts of her. Did she notice him, blowing a kiss in after leaving the room, doing the closest thing that he could to actually loving her? Did she ever notice him? Did she ever want to notice him?
Was it alright for Harry to be feeling the way he did, like his heart was going to rip out of his chest? Like he was pushed against a wall, with nobody allowed to enter? Nobody seemed to want to let them be together, Hermione warned against him getting attached to anyone if he was actually going to kill Voldemort, and Ron, well…Ron would murder Harry. Voldemort didn't have anything on a pissed off Ron, that was for sure. Ron fought tooth and nail for his family.
But honestly, he was dying to see her, to know she was ok. To wrap his arms around her in the presence of her family, pretending he was just a friend, but secretly wishing to become so much more than a friend.
Did she notice him as he looked at her, as he looked into her beautiful light green eyes, just a touch lighter than his own? Had she noticed him in her first year of Hogwarts? She had, she'd sent him the valentine. But she didn't know that he still had the piece of paper that he was given on Valentine's Day in second year. He still hummed the tune to himself sometimes, when he was alone. 'His eyes are as green as a fresh pickled toad, his hair is as dark as a blackboard,'
Did she notice him when the clocks changed, when everything happened all so suddenly? When he faced Bellatrix, when Sirius died. Did she notice him at all?
She was everything. Everything he wanted and needed was wrapped up in Ginerva Weasley. She was everything he had wanted. So many people thought that he and Hermione were perfect together, but they weren't. Truth was, her heart belonged to Ron. They'd had so many discussions about it, Harry telling Hermione to suck it up, and ask him out, and Hermione refusing, saying that if he didn't feel the same way it would ruin their relationship. But Ron did feel the same way, he'd told Harry that he thought Hermione was too good for him, that she didn't deserve someone like him, that his background wasn't good enough for the girl considered the best witch at Hogwarts.
They were teenagers, they weren't supposed to be having these kinds of problems. But he was Harry Potter, and that made all the difference. He was supposed to be the guy who saved the world, but he didn't think that he was that guy. What if he just wanted to be a normal teenager, to be moody and selfish, without retribution? It seemed like every other fifteen year old in the world was allowed to do it, to just be themselves, except him. He just had to deal with school,
Did you notice me as I turned and walked away?