Author's Note: Oh m gosh guys, I am so sorry, we uploaded the wrong document, this is the actually first chapter, not too different! But check it out!
are backkk everyone! And so happy to be. It's so weird not to post
a chapter all the time. I think I was going through review
withdrawal! But here we are back with our new addition to hope:
P.S. If you have not read Hope this isn't going to make much sense, but you can go to my profile and click on the story Hope and it'll make a lot more sense once you read that!
Forgotten Hope Chapter 1- Just You and Me
Here we were. Finally. We were standing in front of the door to our new apartment. That's right-- our apartment. Just for Jasper and me.
Jasper clenched my hand tightly, grinning at the door, feeling the same as I was. This was it.
"You ready, darling?" he asked me, turning his head to flash his bright, sparkling smile at me. To think that he had hidden that smile away from the world for so many years...
I couldn't help but smile back at him. He was so cute...so excited.
"Yep!" I cheered, bouncing on my toes, matching his excitement. I stepped forward toward the door, but before I knew it, I was being swung up into Jasper's arms, bridal style. He took us forward, unlocking the door.
"Aren't you supposed to do this when you get married?" I asked him, mockingly. I gave him a fake look of disapproval.
He stopped half way in and looked down at me, his deep blue eyes dancing with happiness.
"Well, I'll do it then, too. Don't worry," he vowed with a wink. But the statement was so much more than that. He was promising that one day, I would be the one that he married.
I loved how he was always so sure of us. I knew that there hadn't been a lot of stability in his life before me, so to see him trusting me--and our future--just warmed me to the core.
How couldn't he be sure of us, though? Nothing had ever stopped us from loving one another. We had dealt with his abusive stepfather, a psychopathic gang leader and his brainwashed minions, and then survived threats on both of our lives. If none of that could make us even consider leaving each other, then what could? Nothing. We were the real thing and I knew it. We would be together forever. And this was our next step to forever. Living together.
"Sounds good to me..." I whispered under my breath as he brought me up closer to him, so that I could reach his face.
He took one more step. As soon as we had fully entered our new home, he planted a long, passionate kiss onto my lips.
"Welcome home, my love," he murmured, his nose skimming over my cheek lovingly. I leaned over a bit and pecked his cheek tenderly.
"Welcome home to you too, Jazz," I chirped, smiling widely up at him.
We stayed in that position for a moment, gazing into each others eyes, excitement radiating from us.
Banging noises from the hallway brought us both back to reality. Even though we were going to be living alone, it didn't mean the rest of the world didn't exist...unfortunately.
Jasper set me down on my feet and cleared his throat, a small smirk on his lips. Obviously he had been thinking the same thing.
I peeked out the door to see the movers making their way through the hallway with our boxes. Many, many boxes.
During the whole month of July, I had tortured Jasper by making him go out and pick out things for our new place. Every piece of furniture, every towel, every picture, and pretty much everything else we would be putting in this apartment, I had him choose with me.
Jasper surprisingly didn't seem to mind, though. He just came along happily, watching me with amused eyes as I rushed around the stores.
"Want me to show you around?" Jasper asked, his eyes beaming with anticipation. Even though I had picked out everything for the apartment with him, Jasper had picked out the apartment. He had said that he wanted to surprise me... so far it was looking fantastic.
To call it simply an "apartment" wasn't really accurate. It wasn't your normal apartment... it was more like a condo...
Jasper had said that he didn't think I could live in a normal apartment after where I usually lived. I rolled my eyes as I remembered him saying that ...I could so!
But I definitely was not complaining about this place. One whole side of the living room was windows. A remote control curtain hung over them, shading us from any light that might want to peek through. All of the furniture had already been delivered and placed in the apartment. The room was painted a light, welcoming blue, just like my room at home had been.
Jasper tugged on my hand impatiently, anxious to show me the rest.
I sighed loudly and dramatically.
"Okay!" I giggled, following him as he towed me down a hall. He had had this whole place set up perfectly. The hallway was lined with hundreds of pictures of us, looking like the perfect couple that we were, from the beginning of our relationship until now.
The hallways walls were a darker shade of blue and on the opposite wall, four squiggly mirrors reflected the pictures. I couldn't help but think of the set up as art-- the pictures were our past, and the mirrors represented our future.
Jasper didn't give me much time to take it all in, though. He led me to the first door of the hallway and then opened it up, a smile tugging on the sides of his lips.
"First room," he announced, waving me into the room, following behind. I stood shell shocked at the door. He had done all of this for me...
"I got Spencer to design it for you," he informed me casually, wrapping his arms around my waist from behind. He rested his chin on my shoulder as I stood frozen. Wow...
I tried to take it all in... the high tech sewing machines, the mannequins lined up on the other side of the room, two laptops sitting on a wall-long desk...and then beside the laptops were sketching pads and drawing materials. Then, an easel stood in front of part of the desk. One wall was a whole wall of different clothing materials.
I couldn't even speak what I was thinking... it was all just... incredible! How had he payed for this?! Especially after buying the condo...
"Like it?" he asked softly in my ear. I felt his arms tightening around me, his voice slightly uncertain, since I hadn't moved or made a sound in a few minutes.
I took a deep breath, trying to get words out.
"Like it? Jazz, I love it!" I squealed, the words suddenly coming out in a loud squeal.
I jumped around and hugged him tightly around the neck, my feet dangling in the air. Jasper's confidence came back as he spun me around.
"Good, because if you didn't, I was about to sue Spencer for everything he's got," he chuckled.
I couldn't even believe how happy Jasper had become. His little smile that was always present when he was with me. It was everything I could ask for. I was so grateful that he was finally feeling okay with the world. It was like he was able to be himself and be safe. No more worries for my man.
"You must have already sued him for everything he had to pay for this!" I smirked, raising a curious eyebrow at him.
He shrugged sheepishly and put me down on my feet.
"I didn't have to pay for all of it. Part of it is a welcome home gift from your parents," Jasper told me.
This surprised me. Not that they had paid, but that Jasper had accepted their money. But I guessed that he wouldn't have known what to buy... leave it to my mother and Spencer for that one.
"You'll have to thank them," he reminded me, kissing my cheek softly. Happiness radiated off of him as he saw how much I liked it.
"Next room?" he suggested quickly, his pleasure in surprising me taking over his thoughts again.
I nodded in agreement, letting my arms drop from his neck. Jasper let me turn around but kept his arms around waist, walking very closely behind me. He continued leading me down the hallway of pictures and opened another door.
This time, it was our bedroom. It looked very similar to the one at the Cullens'. Jasper probably hadn't wanted to change it much. Why change a good thing, right? Except for the wide screen TV on the wall in front of the huge bed, and...oh wow.
Jasper had outdone himself. I giggled, amused at what I just noticed.
I slapped his arm teasingly.
"What?... I didn't buy it, Spencer did," Jasper admitted quickly. "It was his welcome home gift. He thought we would enjoy it." Jasper's voice turned sexy and rough as he squeezed me tightly to his chest, kissing my earlobe.
"Yeah, sure he did. I bet you begged him to buy that," I joked, squirming a bit in his grasp because of his breath tickling my neck.
"Maybe..." he smirked, pulling away from me, but taking my hand in his.
"But there's more," he told me, his southern accent coming out in his excitement. More...?
He was trying to hold back a smile as he led me across the bedroom to a door. He motioned for me to go in.
I waited for a moment, searching his eyes, and then turned to the door, pushing it open.
That was the only word that came to mind as I opened the door to my own paradise. The clothes closet.
Naturally, he had made sure it was huge! It was just as big as our bedroom and waiting to be filled with all of my clothes.
I squealed, thrilled, jumping up and down. Jasper chuckled to himself from behind me, probably watching me with full amusement.
"It's perfect!" I told him, turning around to see his amused, but very pleased look.
"But you know that this means we'll have to go shopping... you know... to fill it up," I murmured quietly, my head down looking at the ground.
"I figured as much..." he grumbled playfully.
I grinned thankfully at him and pecked his lips.
"Thanks," I whispered lovingly to him, thanking him for everything that he had done.
"Anytime." He pressed his lips together tightly and ran a finger through my hair.
"Now for the bathroom!" he announced, turning back into his excited state.
He walked ahead quickly, making me jog to catch up to him. He opened a different door in the room, walking in before me this time.
He grinned widely at it as I walked in behind him. The room was almost as large as every other one I had seen. There was a huge tub and shower... and then there it was. The thing that he was smiling so happily at. A TV screen positioned so that you could watch from the bath tub if you wanted.
What a boyfriend... I was pretty sure that Emmett had been a bad influence on him.
But I couldn't complain about the bathroom. It was almost elegant... other than the TV. There was a little part of the wall sticking out, filled with tons of pebbles that water trickled down on soothingly. The sink was one of those old-fashioned styles that looked like a huge bowl.
"Esme helped me plan this one... Emmett's idea was the TV," he explained, touching the water that was flowing onto the rocks.
I nodded approvingly at him. I loved how he had tried to include everyone in the planning. They had all been proud of us, but still sad to see us go.
I felt the sadness of leaving them coming through me. I started to feel a little homesick for Forks. I missed them already. And Nick, who was now in Texas. And Bella and Mack...
I felt my lips turn a bit into a frown.
"Darling?" Jasper said softly, his finger lightly touching my cheek. "You all right? If you don't like it, we can change something... we can do it over if you want... I was just trying different things out—" I cut him off, pressing my fingers to his lips.
"No, it's perfect Jasper. You know exactly what I want," I assured him, tiptoeing to kiss his lips reassuringly.
He smiled against them but then pulled back, concern still evident in his eyes.
"Then what's wrong?" he questioned me, a sad look starting to fill his eyes.
I rested my head on his chest and let a deep breath out.
"I'm going to miss them..." I whispered painfully, the realization of the whole situation taking me over.
I could feel Jasper shaking his head. He took me in his arms and started to lead me out of the bathroom and back into the hallway.
"Look, love, they are all here with us all the time. See?" He directed my head in the direction of the wall, where all the pictures hung.
He was right. They were all right there, smiling up at me. There, in the center of the wall, was a picture of the Cullen family, including us. They had insisted on us being in their family portrait with them.
I smiled softly at it, moving closer to the wall to see the other pictures.
There was Johnny, sticking his tongue out at the camera. How I'd miss those playful blue eyes and adorable blonde curls.
I would miss him so much, too. His cheerful spirit always brightened everything up. I remembered our farewell to him.
"New York?" Johnny questioned us sadly, his big blue eyes fading from his normal happiness. "Is that really far?" He looked up at Jasper, pouting, his eyes glistening just a bit.
Jasper got down on his knees so that he was at Johnny's level. "It's pretty far," Jasper told him honestly. He put his big hand on Johnny's small shoulder.
"But we are going to visit you...and bring you presents!" Jasper smirked as Johnny's eyes lit up at the word. Johnny glanced up at me for the confirmation. I nodded happily at him.
"Who's going to teach my class now...?" Johnny pouted again, crossing his arms across his chest, looking stubborn.
"I guess you'll get a new teacher. Maybe a cute girl," Jasper said jokingly to Johnny. Johnny wrinkled his nose slightly in disgust.
"Eww," he giggled, his laughter causing both Jasper and me to grin.
"Will you come back for the competition this year?" he asked, his eyes serious again. The way that he said it meant that the idea was not up for negotiation. We were going to come back. Jasper tilted his head to the side, looking Johnny hard in the eye.
"I promise," he vowed to him, pulling him into him for a hug. He squeezed Johnny hard against him.
"I love you, buddy. You can call us for anything, okay? I gave our numbers to your mom, so you just have to ask her, okay?" Jasper instructed him, pulling him away so that he could look him in the eyes again.
"Okay!" Johnny grinned, happy that he had our numbers. "I love you too!"He leaned forward and softly kissed Jasper's forehead like he had when he was sick. His love for Jasper was so strong.Jasper's eyes were full of emotion as he stood up from this little boy; the one light that he had had in his life before I had even come along.
Johnny turned, his toothy grin sparkling as he made his way to me, stretching his arms up. I knelt down, hugging him fondly.
"Be good while we're gone, 'kay?" I told him, running a hand through his wild, blonde curls.Johnny gave me a long roll of his eyes, giggling.
"I will!" he promised, pulling away to move back to Jasper.
"I brought something for you to remember me by," Johnny said shyly, reaching into his backpack, rummaging around in it. He pulled a red piece of material out, but once I could see it, I noticed it was the red jacket. The same red jacket that Johnny had gotten to look like Jasper's the time that he had told Jasper that he wanted to be just like him.
Jasper's eyes softened to liquid. He smiled affectionately at Johnny and bent down to accept it.
"I won't ever forget you, bud," Jasper promised, messing up his hair playfully. Johnny let out a fit of giggles, his laughter ringing over the parking lot. He was too cute...
Jasper stood up and his fingers slipped between mine, his smile sad as he looked at Johnny for the last time before he left.
"See you later, little man," Jasper said to him, waving goodbye.
"Bye Jasper. Bye Alice!" Johnny called as we turned to leave. "Don't forget my present!" he giggled, leaving us with last words that matched his personality perfectly.
Jasper stood beside me, his arm sneaking around my waist. He pulled me into him as he looked at the same picture, showing that he missed him, too.
I turned my head to the next picture, smiling happily at it. Mack was sitting on the swing set at the park, smiling widely at me. It was the real smile with his dimples.
Our goodbye I wouldn't forget. Ever.
"What? You are leaving me!? After all we've been through you are going to hang me out to dry like this? I thought we were in love!" Mack exclaimed dramatically, a smirk tugging on his lips. I rolled my eyes at him and he chuckled.
"That's good, Alice. You are going to work at that dream job. It's about time!" Mack changed to his normal, composed self, giving me a pleased look as he leaned against a tree trunk. He ran his hand through his hair, tugging on it softly, showing me that he did feel a bit worried about it.
"Thanks, Mack. Are you going to be okay here without me?" I asked a bit teasingly, but also honestly. I had been here to keep him straight and in the right mind. There had been a few times when he had called me to talk him through a craving. Once, he had called me kind of late, so Jasper and I had gone out to meet him and just keep him company for a while. He was speaking with his family again, though, which helped him a lot. Though he would never fully be the person that he had been with Katie again, I knew that he could get awfully close.I just hoped that he could stay straight when I left.
He scoffed at me, sending a look of disbelief."I can behave," he glared at me, mockingly.
He stepped forward so that he was in front of me and sighed, his eyes turning serious.
"I'll miss you though. Who is going to put up with all of my pick up lines?" he smirked, raising an unsure eyebrow at me. I chuckled and smiled sadly.
"We'll have to find someone," I stated seriously, nodding my head in confirmation. Mack returned the same nod.
"I'll take care of myself, Alice," he assured me, answering honestly this time. He reached up and moved some hair off of my forehead. "I hope that you and Jasper have your happily ever after in New York. You deserve it.""Thanks, Mack," I said quietly, sad to say goodbye. He smiled widely at me, his eyes light and soft, showing me that he was sincere.
"And thanks for saving me... I didn't deserve any of it. You are really something, Alice Cullen." He leaned forward and left a tender kiss on my cheek before turning and walking away before I could say anything else. He was looking strong and together as I watched him walking away.
Shortly after he had left, when I put my hand back in my jacket pocket, there was a note in it.
If I had a million boogers I'd still pick you...
One last pickup from Mack. He was gross.
I chuckled softly, remembering reading it.
I looked over other pictures, seeing tons of pictures of Jasper and me. Our graduation pictures, which looked adorable. Then there were pictures of Bella and me. Nick and Jasper, before we had gone to the ceremony. Nick, Jasper, and me making goofy faces... there were even pictures of Spencer and me with my parents.
I bursted out laughing when I saw a picture of Mike Newton randomly hanging on the wall.
"Mike?" I questioned Jasper in disbelief. Jasper smiled softly at me and shrugged, his eyes sparkling with mischief.
"Didn't want you to miss him," he snickered, dodging my playful smack.
I scowled at him, but wrapped my arms around his neck. I looked into his eyes, letting all of my love pour through my gaze.
"Thank you, Jazz." I thanked him again, for everything. He knew me too well.
Jasper pulled me closer, his arms tugging on me.
"You are very welcome, darling. I would give anything to have you, just you and me, forever," he sang into my ear as he always did, making my heart skip a beat.
How had I ever been so lucky to find a guy like this? So amazing, so perfect for me...so Jasper.
I watched my love skip around the living room, putting everything in it's place as I lounged out on the long couch. She looked so happy and so excited, I couldn't help but smile as I watched her work her magic, arranging everything perfectly.
"Jazz." Alice was looking at a picture frame, pondering. She inched it a bit the other way and took a step back, looking thoughtful.
"Which way looks better?" she asked me, her face scrunched up in concentration.
I chuckled under my breath and got up, standing behind her, looking over her shoulder. I reached over her shoulder and turned it the opposite way and pushed it back just a bit.
"How about that?" I suggested, hiding a small smirk.
Alice ran a hand through her hair, the movement exactly how mine was when I was stressed. I couldn't help but laugh a little at how we had managed to pick up some of each others habits.
"What?" she complained, turning around, a little annoyed look on her face.
I shrugged innocently and just shook my head dismissively.
She rolled her eyes, the annoyance in them fading away as she realized I was trying to lighten the mood. She turned back around and leaned against my chest.
"You are just so adorable when you are thinking," I admitted, wrapping my arms around her waist.
Her fingers came up and wrapped around mine, but she didn't respond more than that. Her mind just went back to the picture, which made me smile even wider. Adorable...
"I think you got it perfect," she informed me after a minute, sighing in relief that the problem was fixed.
"Of course I did," I said, sounding conceited.
Alice scoffed and I could practically feel her roll her eyes.
"I make everything perfect, don't I darling?" I murmured, a smile still plastered across my face, my voice teasing.
I breathed deeply, smelling her hair, letting all of my senses fade away as I drifted into her little world. Everything was her. Everything I saw, everything I smelled, everything I heard or tasted... it was all Alice.
"Mm-hmm," she whispered almost breathlessly, her head falling back to my shoulder, tilting up so she could see my face.
"You make everything perfect..." she said to my face, her eyes flooded with love and affection.
I felt my senses melt away at her warm gaze.
"As do you, darling," I whispered back, serious this time, turning her around in my arms.
"I know," she smirked, her voice teasing now. It was my turn to roll my eyes.
"I guess we are just two perfect people," she shrugged, pressing her forehead lightly to mine. I lost myself in her beautiful green eyes that were glazing over slightly, as well, staring into mine.
I hummed a bit in thought and shook my head against hers.
"We are two imperfect people, who became perfect together," I suggested to her, rubbing my nose softly against her, causing her to giggle.
She nodded her head in agreement, pulling back just a bit to kiss the tip of my nose, adorably.
Then, I surprised her by pulling her into my arms and catching her lips with mine. She giggled against me as I carried her into our bedroom.
"You were more perfect though," she whispered with a grin, her eyes dancing with mischief and happiness as I sat her on the bed.
I scowled at the statement and shook my head in refusal.
"Not quite, darling. If I remember correctly, I was about to fight your cousin when I met you. That's not very perfect. And you were going to hug him, that's a bit more perfect," I corrected her.
But she just shrugged nonchalantly and wrapped her arms around my neck, pulling me onto the bed with her.
"You're perfect for me..." she breathed, her eyes meeting mine for a short moment before they closed.
Her mouth slowly inched toward mine. She kissed me to seal the words that she had just said.
I slipped my hands under the back of her shirt and pulled her closer to me, letting my hands slide over her smooth skin as she deepened the kiss.
I had no idea how she had found me so perfect when I was so imperfect, but now, the reason didn't matter. All of that was behind me. I was a different person back then.
We had started our new life, just Alice and me.
She moved so that her hands could trail across my stomach before finally pulling my shirt over my head. She stared at my chest with a small smile playing on her lips and then moved her hands to her own shirt.
"What are you doing?" I whispered as she tugged it off.
She wrapped her arms around my neck and leaned in, her body warm against mine.
"It's okay," she whispered back, her voice so innocent and carefree.
"Are you sure?" I asked. I didn't want to push her.
She nodded, "I just wanted to be a little bit closer to you," she said quietly before biting my earlobe teasingly. "Welcome home."
Everything was perfect.
I yawned widely, trying desperately to keep my eyes open. I hadn't slept the last few days. It seemed like something in me was anxious, waiting for something. It was like on Christmas Eve as a kid, when you knew Santa was bringing your present, so you couldn't sleep.
I wasn't sure if it was the anxiety or the dreams that were keeping me from sleep. Sometimes I loved to sleep, to escape... but other times it was just much too painful. Her face haunted my dreams and lately they seemed more real than ever. I hated to wake up and not see her. All I saw were blank, indistinguishable faces... people who meant nothing to me.
I either never slept or slept too much... and it was always extremely restless or extremely deep and full of dreams that would never come true. So I stayed away from bed, keeping caffeine in my blood, and my mind in my work. What a way to live... dreading every waking moment of it.
The only times I cherished were the times I got to see her. Alice. Those were the times I craved, silently begged for. Even if she wasn't holding me, as long as she was there, things were a lot better.
I buzzed for one of the interns when I saw one walk into the office. I needed more caffeine.
A cheerful girl around my age strolled into the room, a wide smile on her face. Her name was Kayla. She had been here for a month now, since the start of summer, I guessed.
She was a good worker, but dreadfully annoying. At least once a week since she had been here, she would ask me out on a date. No matter how many times I said no, she would just ask again. Persistent.
"Yes, Spencer?" she asked, putting her hands on my desk. I groaned internally.
I guess it wasn't that she was annoying... she wasn't a bad girl. She was pretty, smart, talented, efficient, and a hard worker. She just... wasn't Alice. And it was extremely stressful every time I had to reject her.
"Could you get me some coffee?" I asked her, setting down my sketching pencil, looking at her politely.
She tilted her head to the side, her long brown hair covering some of her face.
"Well, I was just about to go out for lunch... and you look pretty hungry... why don't you join me? I'm sure your mom wouldn't mind," she offered softly, giving me a bright smile. Oh, if she only knew how much my mom really would mind.
I opened my mouth to refuse as always, but she cut me off.
"Come on, Spencer. It's just a lunch. I'm not asking you to marry me... I'm just asking for a chance," she said quickly, her eyes pleading with me.
I leaned back in my chair, chewing thoughtfully on my bottom lip. I wasn't going to go on a date with her. I wasn't going to go on a date with anyone.
"Kayla, I will have lunch with you, but it's not a date," I agreed to go with her, adding my own conditions.
She pressed her lips together for a moment then shrugged, agreeing.
"We'll see how it goes," she mumbled, turning around happily, but stopped at the door, waiting for me.
I sighed stressfully, grabbing my sunglasses. I stood up and my eyes flashed to the picture and Alice and me on my desk.
Her big green eyes stared back at me as she grinned up at me. I smiled back. No... I could never date anyone else.
I followed Kayla out of my office, only to be stopped by my mom.
"Spencer, love, where are you going?" my mother asked, gliding out of her office, her eyes looking over Kayla carefully.
"I'm just going to pick up some lunch with Kayla, if that's all right?" I informed her, telling her how it was. Exactly how it was. Nothing more, nothing less.
My mom's nose wrinkled a bit, meaning she was either disgusted or annoyed, though I figured she was probably both.
"Yes, that's fine. Don't forget Alice is coming into town today, though. You should probably stop by and see her," she instructed me, emphasizing Alice's name, giving Kayla a quick look.
Sometimes I wondered how my mother didn't scare these girls away. She looked pretty vicious. I'd be scared...
"I would never forget, Mom. I'll be back soon," I assured her with a small, amused smirk.
My mom smiled approvingly at me and nodded. I stepped forward and pecked her cheek goodbye and she walked back into her office, speaking quietly to Charlotte, Alice's mom. Gossiping again...
"You're always such a gentlemen. Don't you ever just loosen up?" Kayla asked, her words sounding a bit blunt.
I turned around to see her watching me with narrowed eyes.
"Is there something wrong with being polite?" I questioned her, walking forward. I was uncomfortable with her scrutinizing me.
She quickly caught up and shrugged, her face looked like she was thinking about it.
"No, but you are always so respectful and doing exactly what your mom and Mrs. Cullen say. It's like you are a robot or the perfect little son. Do you ever do anything to rebel a little? I don't mean going out and burglarizing or anything, but I mean sneaking out for a joy ride or going to a house party with friends..." she spoke curiously, looking up at my face, totally serious.
The perfect son, I laughed bitterly to myself. If only. According to my father, I was probably the worst son in the world.
I thought of the joy rides with Alice, or the few times that we would sneak out for a night with friends. Nothing crazy, just high school teenager stuff...
But she wasn't mine anymore. And I had a job to do. A serious job. The fashion industry wasn't a joke. And so what if I tried hard? Maybe I liked the approval of my mom. Plus I agreed with her on this one... visiting Alice was on my schedule.
Kayla looked at me oddly, as I had laughed.
"Not quite the perfect son, sorry," I managed to mumble as we took the elevator to the bottom floor.
Kayla just rolled her eyes sarcastically. She pretended like she knew me or something, I thought bitterly.
The ride down the elevator was silent. I put my sunglasses on, ready for any cameras. The elevator opened and we walked through the lobby.
"Who's Alice?" Kayla asked me, a bit hesitantly, as I opened the door of the building for her. How was it that every time I heard her name, my stomach fluttered? Even after knowing her my whole life, it still felt nervous and giddy.
"Someone who means a lot to me," I informed her, departing from the building and heading down the street.
Kayla nodded slowly, but frowned because I was so cryptic.
I felt like I was being rude, but I really thought I was losing my social skills. Especially when I didn't want to be around people too much.
"Is she your girlfriend?" she questioned me, a bit too curiously.
I sighed softly and shook my head, still not even being able to say it out loud.
Kayla's face broke out in a wide, flirty grin.
I immediately looked away, looking over the passing pedestrians. I was getting a feeling that this whole lunch thing wasn't going to work out well. She was too eager, and I definitely wasn't ready for this.
"Why was she so important to your mom?" Kayla asked me.
"Do you always ask this many questions?" I grumbled, running a stressed hand through my hair. I stepped forward and opened the cafe door for her.
She smiled warmly at me, going into the cafe, and I followed her.
"No, you just always seem to keep to yourself. I don't know anything about you," she explained to me politely, taking a seat at a table near the windows.
I sat down across from her, shuffling in the seat a bit anxiously. Alice and Jasper should be arriving at their condo apartment soon... I wanted to see what she thought of the fashion room.
"So? Why is she so important to your mom?" Kayla questioned me, again. I sighed.
"Because Alice is like a daughter to her," I explained, sounding uncaring.
I knew exactly why. They wanted us to be together as much as I wanted it. But unlike me, they still thought there was a chance. I knew Alice too well, though. She...she wouldn't be leaving Jasper.
Kayla was silent for a moment, pondering something. Her eyes flashed suddenly and her head snapped to mine, staring straight into my eyes.
"Alice Cullen?" she wondered, realization flowing into her eyes.
The waitress walked over to take our orders. I felt greatly relieved by that; at least I could stall away from more questions for a second.
I just ordered a coffee, not feeling hungry at the moment.
"Yes, she is Alice Cullen," I confirmed nonchalantly.
Kayla raised a curious eyebrow, taking a sip of her water.
"And that's who they want you to go out with, right?"
"Yes..." I answered slowly, wanting to leave.
Kayla seemed to be thinking now, going silent for a moment. I used that to my advantage.
"So, how'd you get the internship at Cullen and Wright industries?" I asked her, trying to change the subject.
The waitress brought me my coffee and Kayla her lunch. Kayla took a bite of her food and looked at me. She chewed quickly, swallowing her food before answering.
"I was at a fashion school and your mom offered me an internship," she told me softly. I hadn't noticed how her hazel eyes stared into me, reading me.
I ducked my head, breaking the connection she had on me. I grabbed my cup of coffee, taking a long sip of it.
"Why do you always look so sad?" she asked, her soft voice turning even quieter. My eyes flashed up to hers quickly, wondering how she knew that, but then I realized everyone knew. It was all over the magazines, all over the world.
"I am not sad," I stated through tight lips, my hands dropping on the table.
Kayla's smile that had been present the whole time slipped away, her eyes saddening.
"You don't have to pretend to be happy. I'm here, if you ever need to talk or something," Kayla whispered to me, her fingertips grazing over my hand.
I jumped back, off the chair, stumbling.
Not Alice's touch. That was not Alice's touch. My mind repeated, I hated it not being her touch. It was nothing against Kayla-- hell, she had been nothing but nice to me. Overly nice. More nice than I deserved. It just... she wasn't Alice.
I felt my hand shaking, begging to be able to feel Alice's touch, but all I felt was Kayla's.
I hadn't let anyone else touch me like that since I had been with Alice. I didn't want anyone to ever take the feeling of her away from me. I needed to feel her.
"Spencer, it's okay. I'm sorry. Come sit down," Kayla said, standing up.
I shook my head quickly, emotions hitting me. Why would she do that? I didn't want her to touch me...
"Thanks for lunch. I have to get back to work," I said quickly through gritted teeth. I dropped a few bills on the table to pay for the lunch. Then, I hurried out, not sure if I could wait to see Alice again at her and Jasper's new place.
Alice and Jasper... not Alice and Spencer. Spencer and Kayla? Kayla and Spencer? It just sounded wrong.
What if I couldn't stand another person's touch for the rest of my life?... What if I never got Alice back...? She was never coming back to me...
What if I was stuck alone for the rest of my life?
I wanted Alice back. I had never done anything to deserve to lose her! Why did I have to lose her? Why couldn't I just get another chance?
Author's Note: And that my friends was the first chapter of Forgotten Hope. The song I have dedicated for this chapter is Happy Together by Simple Plan, you can find the link on my profile. You can also go to my profile and check out the blog link, which has been updated with some stuff from me and my beta from the beginning to the ending of Hope and a little on the sequel, and you can comment on it in the Hope Forum also on my Profile.
for your feelings *nervousness* How was the first chapter of the
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