A/N: Okay I haven't even started typing this yet and I am already tired. This chapter is 15 pages long in my notebook, that doesn't sound long, but last chapter was only 6 pages in my notebook and was 8 pages on word, because I add extra scenes and more specifics and do a rough draft in my notebook and a final draft while typing. So, yeah, this chapter will be freaking long, luckily it is also my favorite, and my friends favorites, cause they all come in. Good for you though! If anyone is out there…
Disclaimer: Too tired to steal the rights for this from SM, so yeah, I don't own it, stupid rich people get EVERYTHING… :D
I reluctantly pulled back from my love's embrace, knowing that the truth had to be said, no matter how craptastic it was. I leaned against the headboard with my legs spread apart; without me needing to ask Lisa sat between them and rested her head on my chest, I relaxed at her touch. I took her hand in mine, drawing in a deep breath.
"Lisa, I love you so much and I will tell you where I have been, although I know you'd never ask, but first I need you to understand something." I paused and she squeezed my hand in reassurance, I smiled at this beautiful card that fate has dealt me; I wouldn't trade Lisa for anything. "I want you to know that I did not leave of my own volition, and that every second I was away from you ripped apart pieces of my soul. What has happened, which you will soon find out," I spoke quickly, stopping her from her imminent interruption, "is not my fault or your fault, and it is most definitely not this beautiful child's fault." I whispered, covering her stomach with my free hand.
I felt her relax, although she was still incredibly nervous, the one thing she has wanted since before she met me even, in first grade, has been a child. I know that she had struggled with that want throughout every day I spent with her and can only imagine that it grew worse with age. She knew that she couldn't have a child, she was adamant in her belief that sex comes after marriage, and well, with me, her only love, gone there was no way that was possible. I knew that if I had told her to put the baby up for adoption she would, but in the end she would hate me and herself, and her life would be a miserable wreck from then on.
I turned her face towards mine, deciding to be blunt and get it over with. "Lisa, honey, I left because I am a werewolf." I paused, watching the emotions create a show with her face as the stage. I saw shock first, then disbelief, anger, hurt, and betrayal. I could have cried, but instead I kept her from speaking, knowing that once she got started, I would quickly find myself alone, having hurt in the deepest way, the only one I truly love.
"Darling, remember the shaking? How my hands would shake every time I got frustrated? Or, how about the fact that I have grown nearly 2 inches in this past week alone? Do you see all these muscles?" I lifted my shirt a bit so she could see, she gasped and started to speak, but I continued, not being able to stop just yet. "Lisa, you know I don't work out, you know just as well as I do that that is NOT my thing. Sweetheart, you remember the legends right?" Now I paused, waiting for her nod. "Those aren't just legends, we call them that because in this modern world if everyone knew we'd all be put in padded rooms, they are real. This has been coming for a long time, it almost happened when I first began living on the streets, but something always held me back, almost as if my body knew that once I phased no one would be there to help. Then I saw you again and have been so incredibly happy that I couldn't possibly phase. Last night though, I was still worried about you and had experienced a shaking fit during Spanish. When I got home and saw you there, so miserable and all because of me, I was shaking with self-hatred, not at you or the baby, but the fact that I was causing you pain.
"I managed to keep myself under control by helping you, with the knowledge that my presence was helping, but then the doorbell rang. Already barely containing myself even around you I was in physical pain when I opened the door. Brady was there and a man I now know as Sam. Brady had seen my episode in Spanish and had talked to Sam, the Alpha of the werewolves. They saw me shaking and pulled me outside, even further from you, I was immediately angrier. Then the pain had escalated to the point where I was screaming, when the scream turned into a howl I stopped, frightened and shocked.
"Sam told me what I was, and soon I was barking in panic about you, he calmed me down and took me to his house, saying that I had to stay there until morning. Technically it is too dangerous for me to be around humans but Sam could tell how much I needed to see you, so he let me go a bit earlier.
"While at Sam's house I met some of the pack, Brady, Seth, Paul. Seth is really nice; Paul… not so much. I also met Emily, Sam's wife. She is six months pregnant and really nice; I know that she'll like you."
"When do I get to meet her?" Lisa asked, as I had assumed, she was happy at the prospect of having someone to talk to.
"Tonight; but there's more. Emily is Sam's imprint." I smiled at the questioning look on her face and continued, bringing our entwined hands up and kissing her wrist. "Imprinting is a wolf thing, kind of like our insane heat and fast growth, which I am sure you've noticed, we also tend to eat a ton; which you'll see tonight. A wolf's imprint is his, or her," I amended, for Leah's sake, I had heard about her, a lone female in a world of males. "soul mate, their perfect match. All it takes is one look in the eyes once you're a wolf and your entire destiny is sealed in that one connection. Many wolves never find an imprint, while some find theirs immediately."
"Is that why you were avoiding my eyes earlier? You didn't want to know. Shit, I'm not meant to be with you am I? I bet you always knew, and that's why you didn't want to look at me." Lisa was extremely quick, I'll give her that, but at the same time oh so naïve. I was slightly taken aback at her word usage, but considering this was her life we were talking about, it made sense. I mentally punched myself as she began to remove herself from my embrace.
"Lisa! Stop." I lowered my voice to a soothing tone, taking her up in my arms again. She tried to pull away, afraid of the rejection she thought was near, instead I trapped her lips in a kiss, transforming all the fear and anguish I felt at seeing her like this into passion that I poured into the kiss. She moaned softly against my lips, her fears temporarily forgotten, I pulled back and looked deep into her beautiful blue eyes, the most gorgeous freak of nature I have ever seen.
"Lisa, it's true that I didn't want to find out that we weren't meant to be, it's true that I was scared, but it is also true that when I looked into those glorious blue eyes, contrasting with the dark tan skin around them, I felt more love in that second then I have ever felt, except for now. Because that love still remains and I love you more every second. Honey, it isn't that I feared what would happen to you, I feared what I would do when I was separated from you, I can't cause pain like that again…" I suddenly felt weak, the truth behind my speech was as strong as ever, but admitting failure had never been my strong suit. I sat on the edge of the bed with my head in my hands, a few, silent tears slipped out as I thought about what I had done.
Soon I felt a soft kiss on the back of my neck, followed by two seemingly innocent hands as they began to massage my shoulders. But fairly quickly they began pulling my shoulders down to the mattress. Now I was face up and hovering above me was the most beautiful girl in the world. Her knees sat as close as possible to my hips, squeezing them slightly on wither side. Her hands rested on my shoulders and I was shocked into silence. I had always known this side of Lisa existed, it came out whenever someone was questioning her beliefs, insulting her family and friends, or whenever she was just plain angry. But now I saw the fire burning in the back of her eyes, a silent blue fire that pulled me in, and it wasn't anger. It was love.
"So are you saying that we are meant to be?" She asked, I smiled now.
"Good." She whispered before taking over in a kiss so passionate I feared I might drown. For a while I let her kiss me from up top, knowing she enjoyed the rush from being in charge, but I also knew how much she loved being a leader in hiding, letting someone else think they were in charge when really she had all the power in the world to stop it all. I loved this about her, especially because she often just enjoyed the ride, whether it was for a school project, a game where no one knows the exact rules, or this, she knew she could be in control, and every once in a while was, but for the most part she enjoyed being an observer, contributing just as anyone else, yet at most points she took comfort in knowing that someone else was in charge, that she didn't have to do everything, even though anyone who knew her knew she could. Lisa could do anything she wished if she set her mind to it, but most of the time she just, didn't.
Knowing all of this I flipped us over, never breaking the kiss. I felt her hands under my shirt, exploring all the new territory, it felt good to have her hands on my hot skin, like having cool water splashed on you on a hot summer day. Eventually she broke the kiss, in an effort to remove the thin piece of gray material, I paused, grabbing her hand to stop it from moving. Before when I was caught up in the kiss I had just been enjoying the feel of her hands on my chest, nut now my self-consciousness returned. It wasn't that I found myself ugly, I knew how confident all the other guys felt and I had muscles just like them. But something just didn't feel right about I don't know other people seeing me. It made me feel awkward.
"What's wrong Alex?" Lisa whispered, her voice clouded with lust, the fire in her eyes still burning, just dulled, like a wind was blowing, threatening its survival.
"Ummm…" How do I tell her? It doesn't make any sense after all the girls who have seen every part of me, girls that I showed myself to, they certainly didn't choose it. But maybe that was it after all, maybe it felt less special with all the strangers I had shown himself to, all the pain I had caused from people seeing, and feeling me, I didn't want that to happen again, I didn't want to be a monster. Lisa saw everything, she knew me better than I knew myself and in one quick sure motion she removed my shirt. She didn't look at me yet, and just like she knew why I didn't want to show her I knew why she didn't look. She knew she'd get caught up in it all, and right now her priorities rested elsewhere.
"You aren't that person anymore, you never were. I read an article about you that morning, it said that one girl said that you looked as though you were being taken over and that the one moment you looked like a person, a real person, you apologized for all of it. What you did wasn't your fault and I forgive you. I. Forgive. You. So, you need to get over yourself because I know that you are beautiful." At this moment she looked down at me. A small, strangled gasp escaped her lips. She stared, but it didn't feel awkward anymore, it felt like she was supposed to be staring at me, and I was supposed to be staring at her. So I did.
There we were sitting and staring at each other, me shirtless and in shorts, and her, with her around the house sweats on and an old t-shirt from some trip she went on with her class in middle school. Soon though she climbed onto my lap, her hand tracing the new muscles on my torso, at first I hadn't known if I had liked them, I always kind of liked being lazy. But if this was going to become a regular thing there was no way I was turning back now. I explained more things about being a werewolf to her and before I knew it we had to leave for the bonfire.
I quickly pulled on some jeans and grabbed my chap stick, I am nervous as heck about this, but there is no way I am going to not be myself because of it. If they like me, they will like me for who I am. I grabbed Alex's hand once we were in the truck, overjoyed to have him back. Alex was going in just his cutoffs, all thanks to my speech; I was enjoying this probably too much. I kept stealing glances at him as he drove, knowing the way, I remembered earlier when my hands had been on those firm muscles, and immediately wished to go back. Thankfully Alex's muscles weren't like those of a body builder, I found that rather unattractive actually, no he was more like a fit, skinny guy who likes push ups, which I adored. As a matter of fact I am thoroughly enjoying it, and I am pretty sure Alex is too, considering the purring sounds he was making earlier. The purring was new, but incredibly sexy. Hey! Don't blame me! He's the one who decided to go and get all hot, literally and not. He COULD have just been the 'cute' boy he was in third grade, but no, he just HAS to turn out to be the hottest guy on the freakin planet, don't blame me for having eyes.
I watched the sun as it finally sank beneath the horizon on our drive to the cliffs, I smiled as its last burst of light covered Alex and I. I was tucked into Alex's side and was nice and warm; this also gave me another excuse to touch him again. This time I touched with my lips, seeing as one hand was being held in his and the other was tucked behind his back. Darn. I slowly began kissing him any where I could reach, again he started that incredibly hot purring, I could have melted. Soon I heard the car turn off and looked up, seeing we were still not yet there, the purring continued as he looked at me, I questioned him with my eyes. The purring stopped and he laughed lightly.
"You think I am going to be able to drive with you doing that? No way, I will crash within five seconds, it sucks that we have to be there though because I would gladly sit here all night with you doing that." I blushed and ducked my head.
"Sorry," I looked up and smiled at him.
"Don't be sorry, just make sure I get a rain check on that k?" I giggled and nodded at his serious expression. He hugged me close and kissed the top of my forehead, starting the truck and pulling back onto the road. Soon we were there and Alex went around to open my door for me, I blushed and tucked myself under his arm once again as soon as I left.
The smell of a bonfire quickly overtook me and I welcomed it. Burning wood was always one of my favorite smells, next to Alex of course. Around the fire were many huge men, lots of whom were talking with girls or doing, well, whatever it is guys do, a man in a wheelchair, an older woman, and, what really caught my eye, was an obviously pregnant woman, who must be Emily. There was also a little boy toddling around and two infants in their parents' arms, they of course were looking lovingly at the babies in their arms and each other. Alex led me to the largest man here, who was talking to the man in the wheelchair. As we approached I watched as the large man gave Alex a warning look, as if he had done something wrong.
"Sam this is Lisa, Lisa, this is Sam the Alpha," Alex introduced us.
"Hi Sam," I said holding out my hand. Sam, however, was not looking at me, he was glaring at Alex.
"You told her?" He said, quietly but harshly.
Alex looked offended. "Well, yeah, you said that imprints could know everything, and she's my imprint, so I told her, why wait when we have a relationship just as strong as any of you here? I told her, she believed me and she wants to meet the pack and learn more about us, as do I." I smiled at him, he was so sweet.
The pregnant lady walked over to meet us, Emily, I remembered. She stood by Sam and brought his hand to her stomach. "Our baby is kicking Sam! Can you feel it?" Sam nodded and smiled, all traces of anger gone now that she had arrived. She looked at me. "Do you want to feel it… Lisa right?" I smiled and nodded reaching out to touch her swollen belly. As soon as I touched her the baby kicked and I smiled.
"Does it hurt?" I asked cautiously, both frightened and overjoyed that in 5 and a half months I would look just like her, well except for the scars, Alex had told me about them so I wasn't surprised, but still, they intrigued me.
"Like hell," she laughed, "but I know that he'll be perfect, or she, we don't want to know, I know that when this is all over it will be totally worth it." I smiled at her confidence.
I knew that she didn't know about Alex and I fully, or about our baby, only we did, but I immediately felt safer knowing that someone was there, someone who has gone through it, but still has it fresh in their mind. A mother to replace the one I just can't seem to talk to, about anything.
"I have heard so much about you Lisa, especially considering the short amount of time Alex was at my house. I never thought a guy could talk about a girl that much, it is so obvious that he loves you a lot!" Emily said oh so subtly, I just laughed.
"Emily, I know he loves me, I love him too, I also know that I am meant to be with him forever, there is no need to talk him up," I said, still laughing.
"Okay, but he's a keeper! He even helped me with the dishes, none of the boys EVER do that, he mentioned something about you teaching him so I must say, all the imprints are going to have to learn a thing or two from you, you can train 'em good!" I smiled remembering our first real kiss ever, which had come right after the dish incident.
"Everyone will LOVE you Lisa, come and meet them!" Emily said enthusiastically, pulling me over to some couples all sitting on logs.
The first couple we came up to was holding hands and talking quietly. The man had light hair and dark blue eyes, not like mine, with light for Quileute skin. The girl had russet colored hair and normal Quileute skin, along with deep, brown eyes. The girl laughed, a loud and contagious laugh, as the boy smiled, flashing white teeth at her. I saw some of the nearby werewolves laugh and whisper to their imprints, who laughed as well. The two looked up as we approached.
"Devan, Kirbie, this is Lisa; Alex's imprint," Emily said.
"What? He hasn't been a werewolf for two whole days yet and he already has an imprint? No freakin way!" He paused, "That dude's got GAME! Excuse me babe, but I gotta go see if this guy talked to Alice like a week ago." He said giving Kirbie a peck on the lips.
"You do understand Alice can't see us, right?" Kirbie laughed after Devan, who was now searching for my love. Kirbie laughed. "Men are like slinkys, totally useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs."
"Hey! I heard that!" Devan yelled, looking over his shoulder, tripping, and falling. Kirbie, Emily, and I all laughed, everyone else joined in as well as they saw Devan sprawled across the floor.
"Hi Lisa! I'd say I've heard a lot about you, but, as you can see, we just found out about you a minute ago. I'm Kirbie, the imprinted of that psycho over there." She said, pointing to Devan, who got up, and started searching again, looking up above people. As he walked past one man the man stuck out his foot and tripped Devan again. "Paul you jerk face! Stay away from my imprint!" Kirbie yelled at the man. She then went over to a girl and whispered something in her ear; Paul was close enough that he heard.
"No! Rachel please don't listen to her! Please, please, please! You love me don't you?" Rachel, his obvious imprint smirked and shook her head. Kirbie walked over and helped Devan up, then she pointed to Alex, who she found despite the fact that she was significantly shorter than him. He smiled at her and then went to talk to Alex. Kirbie walked back over to us.
"What did you say to her?" I asked in shock, how could words be so effective.
"Oh, just that he wasn't getting any for, a while," She said suggestively.
"How did you pull that off? It's no rumor that they are at it like Emmett and Rosalie." Emily said. Who are these people? Alice? Emmett and Rosalie?
"Well it turns out that she's pregnant, she told me yesterday," I immediately got excited, someone else for me to talk to. "She said she's going to announce it to everyone tomorrow at Sue's, since they are leaving the day after for Virginia." My hopes were crushed.
"Yeah, how long will they be out at the Cullen's?" Emily asks, another name I don't know.
"Rachel said until the Cullens move, Embry and Quil wanted to go, but their imprints are here. They can't leave them, so Paul and Rachel are going. Anyway Rachel was all freaked out that is they do it too much there will be complications with the baby, that's what one of her college friends said anyway."
I thrust out my hand, realizing I hadn't yet introduced myself, "I'm Lisa the imprinted of that umm…Alex over there," I said uncertainly as Alex started dancing around like a chicken. Kirbie and I glanced at each other, immediately bursting into laughter.
"Hey sister! What's happening?" A boy looking a lot like Kirbie walked up, followed by a girl who had been talking to Rachel. The girl had dark brown hair with a lot of natural red in it, and her eyes were a slate gray that instantly made me think of the Greek goddess Athena, goddess of wisdom, whose eyes were gray as well. The girl came up and automatically held the boy's hand, the boy shoulders relaxed and he leaned toward her, they were obviously an imprinted couple.
"Well I just met this awesome girl who is so totally going to be my friend and you can't even know her name." Kirbie replied.
"Really!" They continued making hand motions and getting in each other's space, but they were on the verge of laughter the entire time. I looked to the girl.
"Hello, I'm Lisa, Alex's imprint, and you are?" I asked casually trying to start a conversation.
"I'm Ella, that over there is my guy, Joey. He and Kirbie are twins and this is their FAVORITE thing to do, it's actually really funny," the two in question suddenly burst into laughter and did this really long handshake, it was obvious that the beginning was rehearsed, but at the end Joey did all these random movements complaining in mock anger when she didn't get it right.
"NO! Kirbie you have it ALL wrong! You always mess everything up!" Joey yells at Kirbie as he does a whole bunch of quick fake punches, Kirbie is laughing so hard she is crying and she can barely breathe. They come back to us laughing and Joey immediately takes Ella's hand, again they lean against each other. Joey whispers gibberish into Ella's ear, making sure to say Kirbie's name really loud. Then Joey fake giggles and whispers Kirbie's name again. Both Ella and Kirbie are shaking with silent laughter at Joey's stupidity.
Joey's ears suddenly perk up. "Embry's finally here," he whispers mainly to Ella, but we all hear him. His face scrunches up in disgust, "Ugh, this will give me a head ache, I'll see you later Honey." He whispers this to Ella and then makes a dramatic exit, kissing Ella's outstretched hand and whispering random French words. "Girl who I can't know," he nods to me, then he squints at Kirbie, "Kirbie." He says it like it disgusts him, we all laugh as he walks away.
A couple walk out of the forest, the man, I'm guessing Embry, tries to give his girlfriend a quick peck on the lips but she is obviously so happy that the kiss may have better been left when well over 25 people weren't watching them, as the case was. When they pulled apart Embry looked sufficiently shocked, but the girl didn't notice, instead she sprinted over to us. Her left hand was suspiciously hidden in her pocket, and she would be bouncing of the walls, if there were any. She was trying to calm herself, but she was failing. So instead she just gave a really high pitched squeal that us humans could barely hear, all the wolves however, could hear it perfectly and they all covered their ears and whined in pain.
The girl was obviously not Quileute, though not the only one here. Her hair was blond and straight, her blue eyes reminded me of my mother's, bright and daring like mine, but there was little contrast seeing as she was possibly the palest girl I had ever met. Her cheeks were flushed pink with excitement, and her pale skin only made her look that much prettier, she was a bit older than me, but by the sound of that squeal I am pretty sure that we will be great friends.
Ella finally realized that she couldn't see the girl's left hand. "Oh. My. Gosh. He proposed? Ahhhhh!" Even though I didn't even know this girl's name I joined in on the four person squeal.
"Shit! Embry do you think you could have waited until, I don't know, they all went mute?" Paul yelled, earning a hard smack from Jared, who sheepishly pointed at Rachel when Paul turned his glare on him.
"She told me to! She promised me food! C'mon man! Don't be like this!" Jared yelled, cowering in fear. Rachel stepped in between them, her eyes daring Paul to push her. Paul got cocky.
"Woman! What else can you take from me? You already took yourself away! I am home free!" Paul yelled, taking a step past Rachel. Rachel grabbed his shirt, stopping his procession. She whispered something and the look of victory suddenly slid from his face, turning into pure horror. He dropped on his knees, kissing anything his lips could reach, all the while whispering pleas for his life, and telling her she was the most beautiful woman in the world, and that he loved her, and that he didn't deserve her greatness, Rachel smirked and caught eyes with the girl in front of me, whose name I still did not know, "Congratulations," Rachel whispered.
"What are you waiting for! Show us the ring!" Kirbie squealed. The girl thrust her hand out from her pocket and we all gasped in delight. The ring was beautiful. Three golden vines were braided together, looking as real as if they were taken right out of nature and covered with gold, these vines made up the band. At the top of the ring all of the vines came together and twisted around a large flower. The flower made me think of a four petaled day lily, the long petals drooped downward, revealing a beautiful sparkly diamond in the middle. I barely knew this girl but I squealed and hugged her anyway.
"Are you Embry's imprint?" I asked her.
"Yeah, my name's Kerrigan, but you can call me Kerri, what can I call you?" She replied, looking at me skeptically with one eyebrow raised, I laughed.
"My name is Lisa, I'm Alex's imprint." I pointed him out, he was talking with Devan, Joey, and Embry, his laugh filled the air and I smiled, content to listen to that sound forever.
"Oh, he must be new, I haven't met him, how long has he been a wolf?" She looked him up and down, but before I could become jealous she shrugged and began staring at her own shirtless fiancé.
"Since about 5:00 p.m. yesterday," I replied, already dreading her next question.
"Hmm, what set him off?" I was still half happy about it so I struggled to make my happiness show through, ignoring all the negatives about all of this.
"I found out yesterday that I was pregnant, he was shaking with self-hatred cause I was crying, and yeah, Sam and Brady came to the door and took him away," I tried to smile, but I could feel tears welling in my eyes.
"Whoa! You're preggers?" Kirbie asked, looking intently at my stomach as if searching for any signs.
"Yeah, about two and a half weeks," I instinctively covered my stomach with my hand, feeling self-conscious because of their stares.
Kerri lowered her voice, "He did it?"
I took a deep breath and answered as quickly and quietly as I could because I saw Alex walking towards us, "I have never had sex in my life," I saw the questions squirming to get out, "That is all for now please." Alex came up behind me and wrapped his hand around my waist.
"Do you want to meet everyone else now?" Alex murmured in my ear, pulling me into a full on hug. I nodded against his chest.
We met everyone then: Collin and Brianne, Brady and Andrea, Michael and Kara, Will and Lexi, Kevin and Zoe, Ian, Craig, and Seth. Paul and Rachel, who were the parents of the little toddler, Peter, they along with Jared and Kim (who were the parents Isaac and Jacob who were the baby boys I had seen earlier) had stopped being wolves to take care of their families, but they still hung out with us most days, the pack bond was forever, once you were in you couldn't really leave, they were your family, you always had to return someday. Jacob had been named after a pack brother who had gone with the Cullen's (Apparently they were vampires who the wolves were great friends with) to West Virginia, which is where Paul and Rachel were going. Jacob had imprinted on a half-vampire, half-human, which sounded really weird, that was in their family. Leah was Seth's older sister, she was currently in college, she was in Jacob's pack. Seth, Embry, and… Quil were in his pack at one time too, but they had their imprints to be with, and Seth had high school to finish as well, so they stayed here, in La Push. Quil's imprint, Claire, was eight years old now, still not old enough to come to these bonfires. Claire's mom, Emily's sister, got breast cancer and died three years ago. So Emily adopted Claire, which is why they are just now having a child of their own. It has been decided that Claire cannot come to the bonfires until she is at least 15, or 14, possibly 13, honestly, they have no idea, they just know not yet. Claire has been at ballet camp for the past few days and will be back tomorrow.
Then of course there were Sam and Emily, Devan and Kirbie, Embry and Kerri, Joey and Ella, and Alex, the love of my life. I was already really good friends with Kerri, Kirbie, and Ella, I could tell that Zoe and Kara would be good friends too. Actually, they were all really nice, well except for Brianne, apparently this was her first bonfire, and she was still really freaked out and she was totally protective, like she wouldn't even let me shake Colin's hand, even though it was obvious from my position leaning against Alex's bare chest that I wasn't interested. She seemed really bitter, but I was determined to change that. Martin would totally love Will, Ian, and Michael, I could tell, if only he could know. Emily was already like a second mother to me, and Sam was totally the "Behave and I am totally okay with you" kind of dad, which was a nice change. Billy, the man in the wheelchair, told us the legends of the tribe, including the battle five years ago with the Cullens.
The Cullens consisted of: Carlisle and Esme (the mother and father figures), Rosalie and Emmett (the love birds, Emmett was, or so I was told, a really big teddy bear and Rosalie, she had some trouble accepting people, but once you were in her circle she would give her life for you, but if you weren't there yet she can seem like a narcissistic bitch.), Alice and Jasper (Alice could see the future, but she couldn't see the werewolves, we thought it was because she had never been one herself, and Jasper could feel and manipulate emotions), Bella, Edward, and their daughter Renesmee (Bella had a shield that protected her mind from a lot of other vampire powers, including her husband, Edward's. Edward can read minds. Renesmee can show people pictures by touching their face, she also ages extremely fast because she is a half-vampire), and Jacob, who had imprinted on Renesmee.
As we listened to the captivating voice belonging to Billy I leaned against Alex's bare chest and he played with my hair. If the stories weren't so perfect I would be laughing my head off. I hate it when people play with m hair because I love it so much, it's kind of like giving a five year old a massage, it still feels good to them, but at the same time it tickles. When he was pausing between stories Alex whispered that normally Old Quil would tell these stories, but he had died last year, so everyone was still dealing with the loss.
By the time the stories were over most of the imprints were asleep, the warmth from both the fire and their wolves along with the words that Billy had said was a lullaby to them. The wolves were all either staring lovingly at their imprints or nodding off themselves. Emily was quietly going around and picking up all the paper plates and napkins and throwing them in the fire. Alex was asleep beneath me so I got up carefully, trying not to wake him. He stirred and reached out for me, I bent down to whisper in his ear.
"I'll be back soon sweetheart, I am going to go talk to Emily, you just sleep," I kissed his forehead and he relaxed. I walked over to Emily who had just finished; I was scared and needed to talk to my mom. Sam wasn't next to her; he was talking to Billy about something.
"Umm, Emily?" I asked quietly, sitting down next to her. "I already consider you as my second mom and I was wondering if I could talk to you about something."
Emily immediately gave me such a look of pure compassion and love that I nearly started crying already. "Of course dear, you can tell me anything."
I nodded. "Emily, I'm pregnant." I whispered, my voice trembling. A quick look of shock flitted across her face before she again wore the look of concern.
"You and Alex? Already?" She asked, not looking for gossip, just wanting to comfort me.
"It isn't quite that simple, well actually, it isn't simple at all." I took a deep breath, for what seemed like the thousandth time tonight. "Let me start from the beginning…
"Eight years ago Alex and I were 10 and in the fourth grade, we had learned quickly and already knew the difference between a crush and love. I had known Alex since Kindergarten and always had crushes here and there, but I always came back to him. He seemed to know without having to search. He watched me talk about other boys in our class, but he stayed on, every day at recess he would come up with some game for us to play, just us. I had other friends and sometimes decided to be with them instead, he complied, always, just watching from a distance. In fourth grade I had finally decided that it was okay to say that I loved him, to myself anyway. I already knew he loved me, it was obvious." I let out a short laugh.
"I remember how we always thought we were better than everyone else because we already understood love; we just didn't know what to do with it. Some of our classmates had 'boyfriends' and 'girlfriends' but it was obvious that there was no real feeling there so we decided that we would just be friends cause adults didn't understand how it was possible for such young kids to fall in love, but it happened. We were best friends, we laughed and loved.
"One day he didn't show up to school, the teacher said nothing when I asked, and I was so scared. After school I went to his house…" I skipped over editing; Emily just listened, knowing what I was doing. "My other best friend, Lily, found me there hours later, on his bed, breathing in his scent and hugging tightly to the stuffed crab-apple I had given him for his last birthday.
"After that I essentially was a zombie. Eventually people stopped noticing, and I got better at hiding. I hung out with people that made it so I didn't have to think about emotions, I tried to be alone as little as possible because when I was I broke down. Eventually I learned to cope with it all, I grew stronger, I lived, and people thought I got better, but I just never showed it. I didn't listen to my feelings, I avoided them, often when I was alone I would turn up my music as loud as it could go so that I couldn't hear my thoughts. I developed a kind of shield. A defensive tool, if you will. I could completely zone out, feel nothing, see nothing, hear nothing, smell nothing, taste nothing. I would live in this happy part of my brain, completely oblivious to the world. The only person I really talked to was my dog, Cappuccino, who I took on a walk every morning. A few weeks ago I was on one of these walks and… you heard about the man right? The man who was, umm, raping girls?" Again I was nervous, this was the make it or break t moment, unconsciously my eyes flicked in Alex's direction. Emily followed my gaze.
"Oh my gosh! It was h-him? Alex?" She stuttered a fire growing in the back of her eyes. She stood up, her fist clenching. I reached up and pulled her back down.
"Wait! Wait Emily! You have to hear his side too! We are soul mates, and you know that if you hurt him I will gladly hospitalize you!" I didn't like threatening my mother, but it was true, and I needed her to listen. She sat down angrily, and stopped glaring at my love, softening her gaze as she looked at me again.
"I'm listening," she sighed, defeated.
"Thank you, we both nearly died at the separation of each other, but I was a lot stronger than him, I had places to go to and people to distract me, I had at least one thing to talk to. Alex was alone with his b**** of a mother, who had dragged him away in the middle of the night, as much as he protested, she had also ripped the crab-apple from his grasp, leaving him with no reminder of me either. He was kept together only because that piece of crap that gave birth to him gave him absolutely no freedom, he had to stay in the house at all times, he had no room to do wrong. Eventually his mother died of drug overdose and he soon ran out of money. Without something to count, something to keep him occupied-he had dropped out of school too- he literally went insane.
"It was as if a monster inside of him was released, he had no control and all he could think about was me. It was true that he had loved me and when we were together he didn't feel lust because we were too underdeveloped, but now the monster that had consumed him was fully developed and wanted only to be 'satisfied'. He found girls that reminded him of me in some way, and the monster took over. He hated himself for it, but couldn't stop no matter how much he wanted.
"Then he found me, I think that somehow the small sane part of his mind knew it was me, because he took me to the abandoned house we used to play in, instead of just screwing me right there. I don't remember anything about it, I had turned on my shield. I had known what was coming. When I 'woke up' he was there, staring. We talked, caught up in the similarities of each other. I convinced him to say his name at the same time I said mine. When we did we were shocked. I forgave, all he had ever done he had done because of me. And besides, love is forgiving, and I still loved him, and I still do.
"Alex is everything; I couldn't live without him, not again. My parents and brother know him as Hayden Puckett. My parents don't know I am pregnant, I am afraid of what they'll do to Alex. Knowing my parents, they won't wait to hear what I have to say. Emily, I am scared, but you have to understand that I'm not giving up our baby anymore than I am giving up Alex." I placed my head in my hands, finished. I thought I heard Emily sniffle, but before I could be sure I was encased in her loving arms.
"You are, by far, the bravest person I have ever met. I would never survive through all that you have, and I would never be able to sit here and tell it to someone I just met." Emily told me, pulling back to look me in the eye.
"I'm not brave Emily! I am scared out of my mind! I still have school to finish, a family, friends, and I want to go to college! What would I tell my mom? What would I tell my DAD? They would just ground me for forever and then they would beat Alex to death, never knowing the whole story! And what about all my friends? They think that I am the perfect child, they don't know any of this! Emily, I can't survive without Alex again!" I was hysterical by now; but Emily just pulled me into her arms again.
"You have a family, you have friends, who love you, and will NEVER let you go, everything will be okay, and we aren't leaving you." She murmured into my ear. I felt an extremely warm hand on my back, the electrical shock that went through my body told me instantly who it was. I looked into the eyes of my love; his face was full of love. He pulled me into the warmth and comfort of his arms and I collapsed against him, completely drained of all energy.
He realized how tired I was and picked me up, bridal style, I lay my head against his chest, content. "Emily, you can tell the rest of the pack what you just heard, we don't need to tell this again, thank you so much." Alex whispered to Emily.
As he carried me to the truck I heard a few murmured, 'Bye Lisa's, I dropped my hand from Alex's grasp in a half-attempted wave. "I love you Lisa, so much," Alex whispered, kissing my forehead, I nodded tiredly and breathed in his glorious scent, knowing that whatever happened now I would be perfectly safe in his arms.
A/N: Sappy goodness! Wow, this chapter took me a day and a half to type, it is freakin long, 14 pages! I can guarantee you that you won't have this long of chapters after this. A warning: I don't know how often I'll be able to post because I do have a social life, and I am working at church camp for a lot of the summer, where I won't be able to type at all, I am also going to Honduras for a mission trip at the end of June for a week, so I will be totally swamped, but I wanted to get this really long chapter out before I leave tomorrow, if you would review I would absolutely adore you! Thanks!