Title: The Immunity Obstacle
Spoilers: Vague references to seasons 1 & 2
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or have any affiliation with the production company. I'm only borrowing them for the weekend.
Enjoy!
It all started because Penny snaked one of Sheldon's onion rings again. She wouldn't have done it if the others were here, so she didn't have to listen to their whining protests telling her to stop. But, since it was just her and Sheldon, she decided to see how far she could push him.
"Penny you touched my food! Since you know the consequence of that action, I have to ask you why would you do such a thing knowing you automatically incur a strike?"
"Sheldon, you need to lighten up. You do realize that I handle your food at the Cheesecake factory, and you have no problem with that."
"You touch my food before serving me?" he squawked.
"No, I don't touch your food, but I touch the plate your food comes on. I touched the very food container that our takeout came in tonight, which you then handled as well."
"Oh God, the germs! I have become lax in my precautions against invading bacteria. Oh, I feel ill. Even if I had been tempted to eat any of my food before, I certainly cannot now. Lord knows what pathogens you may be harboring!"
"Are you afraid of my little ol' girl germs Sheldon?" she cooed at him.
Penny inched closer to Sheldon.
"Penny, I must ask you to keep your distance."
Game on. Time to play make the scientist squirm!
Sheldon shrank back as far into the couch as was possible. Penny could smell the easy victory. She wiggled her fingers in front of his face.
"I haven't even washed my hands in hours."
"Gak!" Sheldon inhaled sharply, looking for an escape, but Penny had moved in front of him effectively blocking him from getting up and away from her on the couch. There was no other course of action available. He had to touch her in order to get her to move. As he grasped her around the waist to propel her backwards, his left thumb inadvertently went beneath her halter top and lightly grazed her stomach. Penny let out a high pitched squeak and jumped back. Sheldon's eyebrows shot up as he realized he may now have the upper hand.
"Why Penny, are you ticklish?"
Penny backed away from him to the other side of the coffee table as quickly as she could.
Damn, he found my kryptonite!
Sheldon thought it over as he tired to stare her down.
Germs? ---- Revenge? ----- Germs? ---- Revenge? ---- Germs?
"You wouldn't dare. I'm still all germy!"
And with that, she darted forward and grabbed another onion ring. That did it for Sheldon.
Revenge it is!
Sheldon started around the coffee table after her his arms outstretched in front of him.
"Oh, you are going to regret ever touching my food!"
Around and around the coffee table and the couch, through the kitchen and back again he chased her while she defiantly laughed and skipped out of his grasp. Ten minutes after the game of cat and mouse began it was brought to an end when he finally snagged the hem of her shirt. Penny writhed back and forth trying to escape from Sheldon's hands.
Damn hands, damn long fingers!
She squeaked and squealed as he mercilessly tickled her. As the moments ticked by she just couldn't take it anymore.
But hell, it's getting me hot!
She gasped out, "Sheldon, stop! I can't stand it. You have to stop. Oh, stop. You're going to make me pee!"
He ever so slightly let his grasp on her lessen. Penny took advantage and went to back away from him again when she tripped over something on the floor. As she lost her balance, Penny grabbed the front of his t-shirt, and instead of keeping herself from falling, she ended up dragging him with her right onto the couch. Now she was the one trapped , only she had Sheldon's full weight on top of her.
Oh man, this feels so good.
"Penny are you sick?"
"No, no I think I'm okay. Wait, why did you ask me if I was sick and not hurt?"
"Well, your face is flushed and your pupils are dilated, your respiration rate is increasing and…"
He reached to her neck to feel her pulse which brought another 'eep' and a burst of nervous laughter from her.
"..your pulse is racing."
"If I'm sick, you must be too. You're flushed as well."
"Oh dear Lord, I knew this would happen."
Sheldon reached up to check his own pulse.
"Sheldon honey, calm down. I'm not sick and neither are you."
"How can you be sure. You touched my food. And the physical contact must have transmitted some disease."
"Well, it's not any disease, but I'm pretty sure it has something to do with the physical contact."
"Huh?"
"You're a man, I'm a woman." she started to explain.
"What does that have to do with anything!?"
He only looked at her blankly. He wasn't getting it.
Time to get all documentary
"Did you know Sheldon that tickling can actually be a form of foreplay?"
"Foreplay?"
"Yup, I saw it on a show last week on the Discovery Channel."
"Are you saying that you are sexually aroused and I have caused it?" he said nervously.
"From what I can tell, I'm not the only one. Sheldon, do you even realize you're still lying on top of me? And, I'm pretty positive that's not a roll of quarters in your pocket."
She shifted under his weight.
Make that a roll of half-dollars
Sheldon pushed up and away from her and sank down into his spot on the couch.
"Penny, I apologize. If I had known. I didn't mean. I-I-I am not sure what to say. I don't know what to do."
Penny sat up beside him, her heart tripping out a staccato rhythm on her chest.
"It's okay Sweetie, you didn't do anything wrong. It's natural."
"But I'm homo-novus. I'm beyond this."
Homo-erection is more like it
"Apparently you're not as evolved as you thought."
"Penny…I am…this is…."
She moved in closer to him and put her hands on either side of his face, When he failed to pull away from her, she took it as a good sign.
"Sheldon, this is right."
She leaned in and gently kissed him. He responded tentatively. When she pulled away, he automatically followed her to maintain the same space. He locked eyes with her.
"Penny, I am unsure of how to proceed. I do not have much experience."
"Sheldon, are you a virgin?"
"Yes, and I'm not currently ready to alter that state."
This will be nice, not rushing things. How long had it been since I just made out with a guy?
"I'm willing to take it slow if you are."
He nodded his head.
"Penny, I also saw a show on the Discovery Channel recently. Apparently kissing is one of the best ways to exchange beneficial bacteria and help bolster the immune system."
"Well then Dr. Cooper, prepare for your inoculation!"