"Alright, all parts of the operation are complete. Rendezvous back in my room." Lelouch told the others.
Once everyone was safely back in his room, he stood before them with a notebook and pen. "Okay, starting with you Nunnally, what did you experience with her?"
"I don't understand how she caught a full glass of juice with one hand without spilling a drop and simultaneously caught a falling stack of books!" the girl said in an awed voice. "In a period of only 3.05 seconds at that! Impossible!"
Her brother nodded. "Yes, quite unusual. Rolo? What happened with you?"
"Pfft, she must've been on the gymnastics team in her youth! And…taken a few lessons on poise. She executed a one-hand cartwheel perfectly! With a cup and saucer in her other hand!"
Lelouch wrote down this information. "Okay, well, it seems to me that she's skilled in cleaning out heavy stains…heavy, unusual stains. Such as…blood." He looked over to Suzaku. "Alright, and what happened with you?"
Suzaku sat wide-eyed on his friend's bed, rocking back and forth.
"Suzaku?" Rolo called.
"Super Sexy Suzaku?" Nunnally said.
"Wha--? Huh?" The boy mumbled.
"Great, you call him that degrading name and look how quickly he answers," Rolo said.
"What did you see?" Lelouch asked again.
"It…it was awful!" the soldier cried. "Dude, she killed a fly without even looking at it, man! Tell me how normal is that?! She's frickin' evil! You have a murderer living under your roof and it's only a matter of time before the Britannia kids come up missing!!" He abruptly stopped talking, reverting to only whimpering to himself as he rocked back and forth faster.
"Wow…'Zaku's lost it…" Nunnally whispered.
"Naw, that's just how he reacts when things freak him out," Lelouch said. "Anyways, so we have that Mrs. Sayoko has excellent reflexes, extensive knowledge of cleaning up unusual messes and…a knack for handling knives." He snapped his notebook shut and looked up at the room at large. "Lady and gentlemen. I believe we have an assassin in our midst."
Just then, the door opened. Speak of the devil…it was Sayoko.
"OH GOD'S, IT'S OVER!!!" Suzaku screamed. "I wanted to have a life! To have children! Grow old and fat with my wife! Spend my evenings not talking to her and wondering why the hell I'm still married to her! To be harsh with my children and make them resent me like half the kids do their fathers! Is that too much to ask for?!"
"You know, if there was ever a time to kill off the weakest link, now would be it," Rolo whispered to his brother, who actually nodded.
The maid came in the room a bit more, then stepped to the side. Behind her was their mother. "Oh my, I didn't expect all of you to be in here. Well, no matter, it makes things easier on me. Mrs. Sayoko has told me something just now…and in turn, I see that perhaps I should've told you all something."
She paused for a moment to cast a worried glance at Suzaku, who was gripping one of Lelouch's pillows, squeezing it for all it was worth. His trembling shook the entire bed.
Marianne took a deep breath and continued. "Mrs. Sayoko is a trained ninja."
The room was quiet for a moment then everyone began talking at once. "I knew she was a murderer!" Lelouch yelled.
"Is she anything like Sasuke from Naruto?" Nunnally asked hopefully.
"Kill her before she kills us!" Rolo screamed.
And Suzaku gave a very loud and pitiful moan of despair.
"Now, now, calm down all of you!" The Empress commanded. "She's here to protect and serve, not to murder anyone," she added pointedly, directing the comment mainly to her youngest son and the knight.
"We Britannia's are not exactly liked by everyone, you know. And I don't want you children to be smothered by a constant group of guards, so I figured having a nanny that can defend you would be better for your upbringing. Now if you'd like, I can have her swapped out with numerous older guys that are stuffy and boring?"
A generalized collective answer of "no" went up. Except Nunnally, who was all for the idea of she could be assured of having young, handsome guards. Her mother denied this, and thus she too disagreed with her proposal.
"So, will all of you stop testing her out like you have been?" Marianne said. "It is nice to know our children are so aware of their surroundings, but do trust that us adults are as well." She gave them a smile before walking out. Mrs. Sayoko threw them a wink before following.
"Well then…that was…a total waste of time!" Lelouch shouted. "Just when I thought I finally had something interesting to study, mom has to go and ruin it! And Suzaku, I'm going to have to disown you as my friend if you keep up with that," he said, addressing the fact that the other boy was still shaking.
"I come face to face with death each day," Suzaku told him. "But each time I pilot my Lancelot, I know that there's a possibility that I might die. Who expects to be slaughtered when they go to their friend's house? By the gentle old maid at that! I hate to admit this, but her hand skills are even more impressive than mine! Why, she could effortlessly pilot my Knightmare!"
The others blinked at him. "Uh-huh. And that's why you cowered like a little girl?" Rolo asked. "Nunnally, you were wrong. You're more man than Suzaku!"
The knight lifted his chin defensively. "Right, coming from the one that still sleeps with a Power Ranger doll to 'help fight off the monsters'!" Suzaku countered.
"Hey! Who told you that?!"
Rolo turned to his brother. "Oh did he now? Well did you know that he likes to dress up in kimono and perform dances like a maiko? And you'll be surprised, he's quite good at it too, can totally pull off looking like a girl."
It was a hard feat, but Lelouch was able to pull off nonchalance. He shrugged. "Mother taught us a dance or two since she was once a maiko before marrying our father. Often times males will play female roles in plays, and in the one instance that Rolo saw me dressed in such a way, I was asked to play the role of Princess Ayamuri for my fifth grade play…back in the days that I actually went to school."
"Well then, it looks like I hold all the cards here," Nunnally said to them. "The one perfect person out of all of you!"
"Perhaps," Rolo said. Then he smirked at her. "But we know your biggest fears. Now tell me, what's worse. Exploiting a person's most embarrassing secrets, which in time are usually forgotten by others, or continuously pushing a person's fears upon them?"
Nunnally gasped. "You wouldn't!"
"Oh, I wouldn't?"
With that, a full scale riot broke out in the room, the Sayoko matter completely forgotten as the Britannians (Suzaku included) waged their own war on each other.
I'd try to explain what compelled me to write this, but I believe I'd just run around in circles if I did! Anywho, be kind and review!