Spider-man walks through New York City, the them song to the show Jonas randomly playing in his head.
I need to get my head in the game, he thought. Osborn and his group of dark Avengers are up to something and-
His thoughts are suddenly interrupted by a cry for help. Being the hero he is, he swung off the building, towards the person.
"Help!!" The girl cried. Spider-man saw who it was-a blonde teenager. "I can't decide what to wear!!"
"What the heack?" Spidey nearly shouted. He turned away, and was interrupted by a high pitched scream.
"I really want to ignore that," He said, thinking out loud. "Ah, whatever, I'll go help."
He swung away, and the screaming lead him to a car wreck.
A black mouse in red clothing stood there, next to a white duck in a sailor suit.
Wait a minute, that doesn't make any sense!! He though franticly. Ducks aren't sailors!!!
"Donald, I told you to put FOUR wheels on the car," the mouse said, "Not THREE!!"
"But I-" The duck, Donald, stopped when he saw Spidey. "Look Mickey!! It's Spider-Man!!"
Mickey turned around. "Hot dog!!" he exclaimed.
"Mice can't talk!!" Spider-man blurted.
Mickey smiled. "We've got ears!!"
"We've got ears!!" Donald echoed.
"WHY STATE THE OBVIOUS!?!" Spider-man screamed.
Donald and Mickey and all the bystanders around broke into a chant-
"We've got ears! We've got ears! We've got ears! We've got ears! We've got Ears!! We've got ears!!"
Spider-man grabbed the side of his head, and ran away screaming.
When he finally stopped screaming, he realized there was another scream.
"Again, seriously?" He said. "What's with all the screaming today?"
Before he even got swinging in the direction of the screams, the blonde girl from earlier came around the corner.
"Spider-man!!" She shouted. "I just wanted to thank you for helping me decide what to wear."
"What are you talking about?!" Spidey shouted.
"My name is Miley-opps. Uhh, I mean Hannah!!"
And right then and their, she burst into a HORRIBLE dance than melted Spidey's eyes, and began singing so terrible, that his ears bled.
"YOU GET THE BEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSST OF BOTH WOOOOOORRRRRRRRLLLLLLLLLLDSSSSSS!!!"
"This is torture!!" he shouted, right before sinking into unconsciousness.
And, as the world went black, he could've sworn a Jonas brother asked him to marry him.
* * *
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!" Spider-man screamed. He woke up suddenly, people at the bar were all staring at him.
"Mickey-duck!!" He shouted. "Marriage!! Song, bleed!!" The gibberish pored out his mouth.
"That's it-" Iron man said. He grabbed the bottle of beer off of the table Spidey was sitting at.. "I'm cutting you off."
Spider-man stared at him. "Never thought you'd be saying that to me."