Note: I decided to do some tidying up on my first chapter before I started chapter 2, although I try my utmost to ensure my work is readable, I make frequent mistakes, if it was in Spanish, my work would be flawless ;-)

Also, to my reviewers, I appreciate every one of them, and ill personally respond to every single review I get, so please, keep reading my stories, you guys are the only reason I write these!

Nothing can beat a good FanFic.

(Note: the "Spacing Issue" is just how I write, if you like, I can stop, but in my personal opinion its easier too read, as missing a line in a story due too a trick of the eye can be deadly frustrating. :-])


Yuki Nagato's Emotions

Chapter 1: The First Tear


It was considered a normal day in the clubroom.

Well, please take the world "Normal" with a truck load of salt.

This is my little story.

This is my recollection of the events of my fairly decent life.

So far, anyway, I have a good 80 years left, or I at least hope I do.

The day began with no irregularities, It was a simple, hot afternoon.

Haruhi was skimming through the papers for any of her "Mysteries" as usual

Asahina was happy Making Tea whilst humming some Catchy pieces of music.

Koizumi And I were playing shogi, as always, or at least I was trying.

And Nagato, as usual, reading a book, not moving a muscle, and only exerting effort moving the pages.

Koizumi let out a victory laugh, making the last move which led to his decisive victory.

I stood up, conceding defeat (Again)

I hated it, but I showed no emotion, no feelings, I didn't want to give him the satisfaction of beating me, he had enough to smile about, being an esper and all.

We sat, talking about it, and how "He is the greatest player of all time"

Haruhi kept making scowling noises because she could find nothing in the paper.

Asahina went out for some air, it was a total lie, but as usual whenever we asked were she realy went, we were hit with the brick wall which was otherwise known as the 2 dreaded words. "Classified Information"

And Nagato, well it doesn't take a genious to guess what she was still doing.

Well, anyway, on with the story.

Haruhi was ecstatic of recent days, she has been solving cases left right and center, not to mention being flooded with fan mail for the S.O.S Brigade.

Theres 1 girl, who seems to be "Obbsessed" with us.

I forget her first name, her last name?..Izumi, I think..

Haruhi, of course, now thinks of herself as royalty, the smile she wore was as permanent as her yellow ribbons which dangled from her hair.

Not to mention her new self appointed "Perma-Title" of

"The Saviour of north high!"

Hmph, well.

As I was saying, things were normal, but normality in the world of haruhi is something of a blessing, so I, nor anyone else in the SOS brigade Did not take anything for granted, even the air we breathed was precious.

A true blessing

Although, even in haruhi's word I found it odd, that every day, Nagato just Read books, I mean..Everyone has interests, I understand and respect that, but she was just..well, she sits so upright, it even makes me feel uncomfortable, she never lays back, or puts her feet up, Im sure that Haruhi wanted a silent character in her world, but silent, and anti-social?..That's not Haruhi what so ever.

I usually caught a glimpse of what she was reading, usually things about the "Human" Mind, or something alone the lines of "Teenage Love stories", which was rather odd, I never knew Nagato to be interested in all that stuff.

Just when she turned the page, I decided to ask her what she was reading, who knows.

I might be able to have a good conversation with her.

But..She simply raised her book, brandishing the cover, and then carried on reading, in total silence, as always.

Good ol' Yuki.

A few minutes later, the bell rang, the hourly siren.

Every time it goes off, its as if the fabric of time itself is ripped in two..

Haruhi launched herself upwards.


"Tomorrow, I want ALL of you too meet up at the plaza at 12:30 SHARP, You all know, especially Kyon! What happens if your late"

Koizumi gave a smile and a giggle, of course it was an act.

But His personality is what Haruhi wanted, so he wasn't one to argue.

I laid back in my chair, looks like we were going off on another adventure, Great..

One thing that grabbed my attention though

Was Nagato.

She Looked up at Haruhi, and Lowered her glasses, for about a second, then began reading again, whilst pushing her (New) glasses back up.

I cant remember the last time she moved to listen to someone, without being told too.

It just wasn't right.

Koizumi stood up, not removing his smile, put on his coat, and scarf, and left the room.

But I caught him mouth one word whilst opening the door.


Not again.

That one word was practically a death sentence, or something like

"Hey, Kyon! Your about to be set off on another adventure! No doubt it will just a be another 'assault' on your mind, but what the hell, its funny!"


I leaned back, into my chair, chugging the last of my tea.

Haruhi left early, but before she left, she knelt down in front of me and began to speak.

"Y'know Kyon, I've been thinking..Its quite important, and..."

She smiled at me, grabbing the top of my hand.

"Forget it, ill leave it for a surprise for tomorrow, ok?"

"Um, sure thing, Haruhi, ill see you tomorrow!"

When Haruhi left the room, Nagato carried on reading for a few minutes, then I said.

"When you go, Nagato, ill lock up, you look pretty tired."

What got at me more, was her reaction!

She did a (very) Faint gasp, and closed her book.

When she closed it, a note fell out, she obviously saw it, but she didn't pick it was a note for me..

:: 13,25,1,10,1,18,20,13,5,14,20. 12PM::

The clue was so easy it didn't seem like Nagato at all..why leave this clue?

I was nervous, what's going on???



I guess ill get going now.

It was a simple escape, albeit painful.

I just jumped from my window, closing it as I stood on the window sill.

Id die from the usual height, so I just clamped onto a tree branch, hung from it, and dropped.

It made me feel like such a daredevil!

So, I trundled down the dim lit streets, passing by shop owners closing the window gates and locking doors.

Avoiding the large groups of teenagers as I went along.

When I arrived at the apartment blocks, it struck me..

I didn't tell you about the clue!

it was an alphabet riddle..if you don't know what that is..then Im worried for you.

It told me to be at her apartment for 12.

I trundled in, still in uniform...the place was dead.

The orange corridors smelled or a strong cleaning agent, and the faint radio in the background seemed to repeat itself.

The intercom was at the back, with a glass door behind it.

Security was pretty tight for this area..

I dialled Nagato's number.

"Hey, Nagato its me.."

Nothing was said, she just opened the door with due haste.

As I went too turn the handle.

Nagato opened it.

She stared at me for a few seconds, then stepped aside

I went in, and entered the rather spacious cream coloured living room.

Two cups of tea, and a book in the middle of the low table.

Her room was dark, very dark.

I could notice the illuminations from the city were beautiful.

The hustle and bustle of city life, at night.

"Please, take a seat"

I Sat down, not wanting to disrespect my good friend.

"So, what's this about Nagato?.."

Usually, im not scared of anything anymore, Ive seen it all..

But when you have Nagato, nervous in front of your very eyes.

Even the hardiest man will lose his confidence.

No person I know could tell what she was thinking, but it was almost like she "Gave" me an indication of what she was feeling.

If that's even possible.

She took a long drink.

And she picked up her book, and stared at the cover

'Oh the Romance!' was the title.

She looked into my eyes, and very quietly, said

"Im Dying"

Its hard to explain what I felt at that moment.

Nagato wouldn't just "Die" it just wouldn't happen.

But I also cant imagine her being the type of person to break a joke like that.

"What, do you you mean, Nagato?"

She stared at me again..This time with a more serious look in her eyes.

"Follow me..."

I stood up first, and gave her my hand as she proceeded to get up.

She swung round the door frame into the corridor and into her bedroom.

She walked in, her room was stuffed full of books, and posters. (Book covers...)

She removed her socks, and shoes, And looked at me.

What the hell is going on here?..

She then laid down, and got inside her bed, pulled the covers over her, and closed her eyes.

Sensing my confusion..she drew out her arm and pointed it towards a not on her bedside cabinet.

I picked it up, whilst glancing at Her.

::Do Not Wake me, Do Not Touch Me, Do not Not Make A Sufficient amount of Noise. And Most Of All, Do Not Exit My Apartment. But please, have a seat.

Hmph..Polite, but cruel..

::I Am not dying in the way you think. So please do not worry. My brain activities will remain sufficient, and my body will be in fully functioning order. The Data overmind Has requested that I personally become the recipient of a new upgrade::

The note ended there.

I was relieved knowing Nagato was Going too be OK.

But, I couldn't help notice, despite the time, and place, how good looking Nagato was.

I know..its totally the wrong time to bring this up, but I just have too.

The situation was truly baffling.

Why would she leave a note like this, what's going on?

Ill bet my life its something Haruhi ended up making.

but ill wait, until she wakes up..Im sure she will explain...

I usually thought about Nagato, what she felt.

I mean, she must think..right?

Even a data entity must have some feeling..even a bit..

Time passed, round 12 minutes..then.


Nagato was awake, her body, and her eyes..were different, I was getting a totally new aura from her.

She proceeded to sit up, then she blinked with effort a few times, and looked at me.

"Please, C..Come here.

Feeling anxious...

I sat, and didn't say a word, I mean..what's too say?

"Upgrade complete.."

Her eyes widened as she raised her hands in front of her face, she turned them around, examining every last part, she then began to check every part of her body for anything new, and when I say every part, I Mean it..I was even forced to turn around at one point.

When she finished, she stretched her arms in front of herself, and clenched her fists, creating a very loud cracking noise.

She looked at me...

"I see..."

I was starting to feel my heartbeat...

What's going on here?...I feel like im the odd one out, the dumb ass, the fool.

I never get told anything until the last minute.

I took a deep breath, in through the nose, out through the mouth.

And repeat..

"Nagato, would you mind telling me what's going on?!"

She looked at me, pushing away her covers.

"You wouldn't understand"

"Try me"

Her words were different, she wasn't the "Robot" she used to be, her face was half a shade darker, I was sure of it.


Her eyes shot wide open!

She gasped so hard it was almost like a vacuum.

I jumped up from my chair, leaning towards nagato

"What are these?! Kyon!?"

The panic in her eyes was like a fire, the panic in her voice!

I quickly Doused the fire in a sense..

"Veins, nagato..They are normal..Look"

She was looking at the bottom of her wrist, holding it up against the lamp.

Her face calmed, her breath steadied.

"I can explain"

I sat down, and Nagato beamed at me...if anything, she seemed... even more nervous?..

She grabbed my wrist and looked at it, when she saw I was the "Same" she sighed a sigh of relief.

Since when does nagato sigh?...

Since when does she care?

Since when does she..Ah, whatever...there's no point.

She let go of my hands and began to talk.

"The Data overmind requested that I, Yuki Nagato become the first of my kind to delve deeper into the human mind.

In order to truly understand humanity, I must become as close to humanity as I can.

This includes new abilities I am not familiar with, this is why I called for your help."

I didn't know what to say really..Was Nagato..Human?..

"Um, Nagato..."

Before I could continue, nagato spoke.

"How do I use emotions? A book I read said nothing about utilization"

she was so sudden, and to the point.

Nothing like the Nagato I met before, the shy, timid Nagato.

Here I was about too lecture a data entity, a genius..about human emotions..were do I begin?..

"Well, Nagato...Your telling me..Your..human now?"

"Correct, although, I can still use my powers, Most of them, anyway.."


Since when did nagato use that word?..

Well, this was gonna take some time, so I got on with explaining it.

This was gonna take some serious time.

It seemed like it went on for hours.

Nagato seemed to cling onto my every word.

The further I took my explanation, the more obsessed she seemed.

Then, when I covered the basics, Happiness, Sadness, Anger, Fear, even Jealousy.

I got to the last one I could think off.


"Well, this one is a tricky one, as ive never experienced it. Love is hard to find"

Nagato came closer to me, leaning forward, she was entranced.

"When you love someone, you find it hard to talk to them, you admire them, you want too keep them safe, you put them before everything else in life, you value they're lives above your own.

But Love can also hurt like a bullet in the gut, the person you love may not love you back, can cause such a mind-numbing amount of pain, its unbearable."

Nagato's eyes began to twitch, faster, and faster.

"Upgrade...Upgrade Finished 100%"

When those words came from her mouth, she instantly began too cry!

"What is this, kyon!?, Help!"

I kicked back my chair and grabbed nagato's shoulders.

"Nagato, calm down!"

She took away her hands, revealing her face.

Her light purple hair flowed down her face.

Her eyes were so deep, I had to move my own eyes away before I got lost in hers.

Her "New eyes" were perfect, but the one thing which they could make.

The thing Nagato was so scared about?


Simple Tears were welling up in her eyes.

Its hard to describe what happened...

A tear escaped from her eye, rolling down her left cheek, and unto her chin, falling off a few seconds later onto her purple covers.

"Tears..Nagato, they are tears."

She grabbed my hands tightly and blinked so hard her head came down.

3 tears fell onto her covers.

"Love, huh?..."

Nagato was human, her voice flowed as well as any other human.

I was held in silence, I dared not speak, my words would have no effect.

"Kyon, please listen too what I have too say..Its important"