Alright! Here is my first story! What would happen if Jean Valjean became evil? This story is based on Les Miserables the PLAY, not the book. Each chapter will probably be a song, but if I choose to only do part of one I might do 2 songs in 1 chapter. So if you came here for an amazing story about Les Miserables by Victor Hugo, you are in the wrong spot. It is rated T for violence in later chapters. Don't worry, it won't be THAT gory. This story is actually a comedy and tragedy. Let's say I have a funny chapter, don't criticize me for it not being a tragedy. Same with if it's a tragic chapter. Don't be all "this story is so not funny" because maybe I didn't mean for it to be funny. Remember to read and review and flames are welcomed. Sorry for the long and ranting author's note. Enjoy the story!!!!

-Mushie

Chapter 1

The heavy metal chains tugged at his wrists and ankles as he was dragged in line by the police officer. His grubby rags hung over his thin, frail body and as he looked behind him he could see that some other prisoners had passed out and were literally getting dragged by their heavy chains. They each soon grabbed a pick axe and began chopping away at anything they could find. "Look down, look down, don't look 'em in the eye. Look down, look down, you're here until you die." They all sang in unison, hoping to make their terrible experience slightly less dreary. Obviously it didn't work, since the words of the song were so depressing. They should have been singing about castles on a cloud. So the prisoners were sill glum. Suddenly, one of the more daring comments decided to have a small solo portion of the song. "The sun is strong. It's hot as hell below." Soon people began to follow his lead and they began singing solos of their own. "Look down, look down. There's twenty years to go."

"I've done no wrong. Sweet Jesus hear my prayer."

"Look down, look down, sweet Jesus doesn't care."

"I know she'll wait! I know that she'll be true!" A few convicts "aww-ed" over this, but suddenly the sweet moment ended when some other grumpy convict sang.

"Look down, look down, they've all forgotten you." The sweet convict put down his pickaxe and went to a shady corner of the field to mope. He was obviously upset that his fellow convict was thinking that his wife wouldn't wait for him. Everyone watched him move to the corner but they immediately ignored him and began their musical number.

"When I get free you won't see me here for dust!" Suddenly the prisoners heard a quiet snap, and a scream that could make some bleed from the ears was heard soon after. "OHMYGOD! I THINK I BROKE A NAIL!!!" One of the prisoners yelled in a valley girl tone. The other prisoners stared at him in awe, then moved their gaze over to his pick axe, which had a tiny pinky nail dangling from it. "Anyway…" Someone said after he was done crying.

"Look down, look down. You'll always be a slave."

"Look down, look down. You're standing in your grave." After their song was over, most of the convicts continued their monotonous chopping with their pickaxes. That is except one convict. Jean Valjean was not like most convicts. He simply sat on the dirt under his feet to wait for his friend. Soon a shadow loomed over the field. It moved closer and closer to the convicts, who were now cowering with fear. Valjean calmly saw who was coming and a grin began to form on his face.

Inspector Javert was a cold man. He was about six feet tall with brown hair kept tidy in a ponytail and very long sideburns. His eyes glimmered like a snake's and his face was always frowning, that is, unless he was with the one individual who could actually melt his tough exterior.

"Javert!" Valjean smiled at his friend and skipped over to him to give him a "guy-hug". Valjean's right arm and Javert's left arms met in a high-five, then they each pulled each other toward each other and proceeded to slap the other man on the back with their remaining hand. Behold! The "guy-hug" was born!

"Master V!" Javert said to Valjean enthusiastically.

"J-Dog!" How you been doing?' Valjean exclaimed. "Everything's fine! You look…great!" Javert said after scanning Valjean's dirty and frail body.

"Thanks, buddy! So do you! Nice buttons!" Valjean said, examining Javert's impressive gold buttons around his shirt.

"Thanks! Well you should get back to chopping or I could lose my job.:

"Alright, J-Dog. See you around."

"See you, Master V." Javert said and he walked to a tree in the field and sat in the shade. He watched Valjean chopping various things with his pick axe and smiled, then turned to the other prisoners, who were giving him nervous glances, and frowned at them. He began to doze off in the cool shade when he glanced at his watch. It was time…for another musical number. You see, Javert was a big fan of musicals. He would often watch them with Valjean. Their favorite was Legally Blonde the musical because by the end they were both bursting into tears.

"Now bring me prisoner 24601. Your time is up and your parole's begun. Do you know what that means?" Javert sang in a voice that was meant to be stern. He couldn't help it, whenever he saw Jean Valjean he was just so happy!

"Yes it means I'm free." Valjean answered simply.

"You're right it does! I have a great idea!" Javert said to him happily.

"What's the idea, J-Dog?" Valjean asked.

"Let's break your parole! All we have to do is rip up your ticket!"

"You're a genius, J-Dog! Why didn't I think of that?" Valjean said, ripping up his ticket and stomping it into the ground.

"Master V, you are a free man, what will you do now?" Javert asked him.

"I'm getting a taco!"

"Not that! Isn't there something you want to do more?"

"You mean like world destruction?" Valjean asked Javert.

"Not just destruction, domination!" Javert informed him.

"I like the way you think, my friend."

"Thank you, Master V."

"Can we stop on the way to get a taco? We can even go through the drive through if you want." Valjean asked. Javert chuckled.

"Sure. I hear Muchacho's has a new El Grande taco. It's 6.4 pounds and if you eat it in less than an hour you get a free piñata!" Javert happily informed Valjean.

"I am SO there!" Valjean exclaimed excitedly.

After they went out for a taco, (Valjean ate the entire El Grande Taco, and he won a Jonas Brothers piñata.) Javert and Valjean began planning world domination.

"Alright, so we steal from the priest THEN push the cart?" Valjean asked, still holding his new piñata.

"Yep, unless we want to push the cart first." Javert suggested.

"No we need to steal from the priest first, because it's hard to think of a musical number for pushing a cart, so if we steal from the priest first we will have more time to get inspired." Valjean thought intelligently.

"Genius, Master V!"

"Thank you, J-Dog. Guy hug?"

"Obviously!" Javert replied and they performed another guy hug. So the two besties got into Javert's car and drove away, preparing to put their first sinister move into action.


Did you like it? Please be honest in your comments, I'm always trying to improve! Anyways please review and you're allowed to flame.

~Mushie