Though it never gets an easier to confess, I have to admit that I Jacob Black was now basically a part of the "Cullen" family, and as crazy as it may seem, I was beginning to become quiet fond of some of the bloodsuckers who where once my priority to destroy.
Mainly the new acceptance to my once enemies was because Bells, Bella Cullen, she had been the glue that kept the new family of Cullen's and I at peace in the beginning, but most of all she kept me sane during the first year of living with her new family, she was my bestfriend, that's all she ever was and all I ever wanted her to be, she and I had gotten over our first initial braw over the fact that I imprinted on her wonderful daughter Renesmee.
My friendship with Bella was back to the same way it had been in the start, as simple as breathing was to us, well was for me, as she now didn't need to.
Being a vampire, I have to admit, suites Bella extraordinary, someone with Bella's luck and clumsiness' wasn't suppose to be a fragile human. She now looked picture perfect in her husbands arms, they where both like the cliqued perfect, happy, married couple. Sickening, I no.
As for my relationship with her husband, Edward Cullen, it was surprisingly good, he had become a sort of brother to me, a brother who still annoyed the shit out of me whenever he kept going into my head with his stupid mind reading abilities, always being a no good know-it-all, but other than that we often got along.
He was the only one that could truly understand the seniority of my feelings for Renesmee, it took him much longer than Bella to get used to the idea that I am Renesmee's soul mate, and that I am perfect for her, but once Edward saw who much she means to me he couldn't question that my intentions for Renesmee Cullen where that she was happy and safe and loved.
And that she is, she is adored by every member of her family, she has had them wrapped around her perfect fingers ever since she was born.
Renesmee always loved to pick play fights with her biggest uncle Emmett even now that she is in her late teens she still loved to arm wrestle him and constantly fight with him over the TV remote. Emmett of course never fighted to the best of his ability against his niece, his wife Rosalie, would never allow it. Through everyone including me and most likely Emmett knew that even if Emmett did fight with all his strength against Nessie, she would probably still have him with her strength even with her lack of training in a fight.
Emmett saved his full strength in a fight for when he and I decided we where bored, Emmett liked me as soon as he realised that he would have a worthy opponent for him to practice fighting with, an opponent that couldn't predict his next move as soon as his thought it, or an opponent who wasn't trained to be lethal to their own kind. Emmett and I constantly kept each other entertained and our friendship was something that I enjoy having, besides his often remarks of me being his "punching bag" or him claiming that "I'm his bitch".
The other bloodsucker I had came quiet accustom to being around was the little petite Alice, Alice loved having Renesmee around more than anything, since Bella's lack of enthusiasm about hair and fashion Alice would simply save all of her constant new outfits and new beauty products for Nessie, who loved to accept them even though there was no was possible for her to look even more beautiful than she already was naturally, but Bella didn't object to her daughter taking her spot as Alice's guinea pig, it kept Alice off Bella's back about it and Nessie loved spending time with Alice who she thought of more as a sister rather than an aunty.
When Alice wasn't giving Nessie a makeover she was constantly pestering me about giving me a hair cut, I took me a year to trust her enough to let her cut my long hair, which had become a nuisance with phasing, Alice was over the moon with her new freedom to cut my hair even with the harsh limitations that I put on her.
"Nothing special Alice" I'd said to her, "I just want it cropped short, if I turn out looking like I'm a bloody back-door boy I swear to god you will pay for it!".
"Will you relax Jacob, I will make you look as boring as ever if that is really what you want" she would reassure me in her sing-song voice.
But other than that Alice and I got along all the time, she was the only one that never made any comments on my smell or called me a dog, wish I appreciated greatly, it got pretty old after a while, though I never dared to comment on it because Bella would call me a hypocrite as I still called them bloodsucking leaches, occasionally, I tried my best to be nice.
So the life at the Cullen's had become comfortable for me, I basically lived there ever since Nessie was born but after 2 years of going back a forth to La Push every morning and every night got annoying so I and the rest of the Cullen's decided that I should move a bit closer to them for my own convenience, or how Jasper had put it, "become Nessie's guard dog as well as her lap dog", well little did I know just how close I would be moving.
Bella went down to the local real-estate agent to ask whether the land next to the Cullen's house was available, our first official answer had been a no from the female sales person, but when Bella and Rosalie returned for a second opinion, the male agent was more than happy to make an exception for, as he quoted, "such amazingly beautiful ladies". They came home with the agent's phone number, and 1 archer of land right next to the current house for a very affordable price, even for me ever since Alice had put most of my money into the stock market. Emmett found it hilarious rather than appalling, like Edward did, just how easy a normal male human could be manipulated this wife.
Emmett called the agent up and made a perfect imitation of Rosalie's silky voice and proposed that they should go on a date together. Rosalie was furious at her husbands eager for her to date someone and she slapped him right across the face, holy shit, what a sound that made! Emmett stopped her mid way through her second slap on his other check, "Whoa Rosalie, as if I would let that prick get his hands on you!" he said taking the hand that he had caught and twisted his fingers with it. Rosalie was confused, "Well then cancel that date you made with him for tonight! Okay I never thought I would ever have to say that to my husband, weird" Rosalie added as an afterthought.
Emmett laughed his head off, so did I, I understood what he was planning unlike any other member of the family that where all sitting in the kitchen with us.
"Babe, relax, you wont be going on any date tonight" Emmett kissed her, "You belong to me".
Rosalie smiled, the confusion gone from her face, I could tell that if she was human then she would have blushed. "Alice", Emmett said turning to his sister, "Can you make me a women" he said with a perfect imitation of Mrs Doubtfire.
Alice and Nessie returned with the funniest thing I had ever seen, Emmet wearing one of Rosalie's "old" dresses, that Alice had brought for her just last week. Alice had make quiet a lot of adjustments to make the tiny dress fit Emmett's huge frame and made him wear a push up bra, Nessie, who was still roaring with her beautiful musical laughter, had put on of Alice's Wigs on him and used her superb make up skills to make his face into on of what a drag queen would have.
Edward drove Emmett, Nessie and I to the restaurant where he was meeting the sales man, Nessie and I tagged along because we wouldn't miss this guys face for anything. We sat in the car still laughing as we watched Emmett struggle, but still pulled off, the hooker walk into the restaurant with the high heals his big feet where forced into. We watched and the man jumped from his seat as soon as Emmett took the empty one across from him and ran out of the dinner screaming, Emmett looked through the window into our car and gave us thumps up. When we all got home to everyone demanding to know how it went, Emmett said offended, still in his girl voice, "That bitch ditched me, even when I put on my hooker heals, that's what he fucken gets for hitting on my wife!". One of my all time favourite memories during my time at the Cullen's.
Well back to the houses, Edward and Bella pulled some strings to move their cottage from its current location to the new land that we brought so that Renesmee could be closer to her grandparents, aunts and uncles, and I used some on my newly gained money to build an extension of an upper level onto the cottage.
The new level of the house was built purposely for me and Nessie; it consisted on two bedrooms as we where the only ones who still needed our 8 hours each night. My Room is the smallest one, just a normal room with bathroom and a walk in closet, which Nessie has taken over with her unreasonable amount of clothes that don't all fit into her enormous walk in closet, I didn't object to her and I sharing mine as I only needed three draws in the closet. Nessie's room is similar besides hers has a bigger bathroom and a bigger closet.
Edward and Bella had turned Nessie's old room downstairs into another room besides their own room where they could spend some time alone together.
Back in the Cullen's house, which we called the our home, there had been some adjustments there too, the garage had been extended to fit everyone's cars, my Rabbit and my new Mustang GT500 09, Edwards Volvo, Ducati and his Aston Martin Vanquish, Bella's Ferrari and her Mercedes Guard, Rosalie's BMW, Alice's Porsche, Emmett's Jeep Wrangler, Carlisle Mercedes, Bella's and mine Harley Sprint and Honda motorcycles and the three new editions, Esme's Audi Q7, Jaspers Hummer H3 and Nessie's "17th" birthday present, her orange Lamborghini Gallardo.
16 vehicles, it seemed a bit ridiculous at the start but each of them served its purpose, and some good came out of it I guess, my friendship, if that is what you can call it, with Rosalie Hale for one thing. She was the only Cullen I didn't get along with until recently, Constantly getting on each others nerves for no good reason other than wanting a nice fight, we where both as bad as each other, with my many blonde jokes and her smart arse "dog" remarks.
That was until one day when I was out in the garage working on Bella's Ferrari and Rosalie came butting in leaning against the side on the car with a smirk on her face.
"Don't worry about the exhaust" she quoted just as I went to check it, "I have already put a Gibson exhaust tip on it, such a shame we cant drive it around here huh, 483hp, I could probably get up to 200 miles per hour" she finished still smirking.
"Impressive so you know a tiny bit about the Ferrari" I snapped at her from underneath the car trying to sound unimpressed.
"A tiny bit?" she laughed leaning down to observe under the car "The brakes are fine too, it has new cast-iron alloy for the discs so it has better heat dissipation performance".
"Hmm, Impressive I must say Rosalie, not so dumb when it comes to cars" I admitted enthusiastically, rolling out from underneath the car.
"How about you Jacob", she put a lot on emphasis on my name, as if it was truly an effort for her to say it, "What do you know about this baby" she finished running her stone like fingers against the side of Nessie's Gallardo.
I raised my eyebrows at her because she seemed doubtful on my knowledge on cars, I walked over to her and sat in the driver's seat as I said, "It has a V10 cylinder engine, it's mid-mounted, just behind the seats, in a longitudinal position, 5.2 litres if I'm not mistaken, 552 hp so probably can get it up to 200 mph like the Ferrari, 0-62 in about 4 seconds is my guess".
Rosalie with her arms crossed her chest smiled in admiration and clicked her tongue, "Wow, I must say I'm impressed too Jacob, it's nice to have someone in this family that has almost as much knowledge as me when it comes to mechanics, for centuries I have only had Edward who sort of understood the workings of fine automobiles".
I scoffed, "almost" yeah right. "Ha, that must suck; good to know there's one thing I'm better than him at". I said delighted jumping out of the car and closing the scissor door with a nice thud.
"I know what you mean, I tried proving to Carlisle once that I had more knowledge than Edward in at least one subject, Carlisle sat me and Edward down and quizzed us on how much we knew about Mercedes, but that didn't bloody work now did it! As soon I thought of the answer, the basterd stole it and said it before I could!" Rosalie laughed at the memory, "Edward found it hilarious, he can have a sense of humor when he wants to!"
I laughed too; I had never seen this side of Rosalie before, sounded like a female version of me, down right scary!
Ever since then Rosalie and I had spent the days when Nessie and Emmett where out hunting in the garage, we spent out time detailing and tuning up any part of any of the cars that we could then after a while we reached the limit on how many times you could pull cars together then put them back so Rosalie decided in a new investment, she brought herself a white Audi R8 convertible, she walked into the garage that day slowly chucking the keys up and down to herself, she wore a huge smug grin and answered my question of, "what are you so happy about?", by opening the garage door to reveal her new set of wheels.
"You like? I thought since we are going to have heaps on time on our hands when Nessie, Bella and Edward go to visit Bella' mum, that I should buy us a new project, if I have to watch wrestling a second longer with Emmett I will light myself on fire!" she said as she threw the keys over to me and I caught them reflexivity with my right hand, I had to admit, she was an annoying blonde half the time, but she was a bloody legend!, "If you get a scratch on it before I can detail it then I'm going to dismember you, I swear mutt" she joked, I could tell other wise she would have spat the word "mutt" out.
I remember I was absolutely in awe of the new beautiful car, probably because the first initial awe of all the other cars had wore off after about my 16th time dissembling and reassembling them. So all in all, it was a good decision to have a bigger Garage.
So life, seemed prefect I had gotten used to the smell, gotten used to my new family, and I didn't have to give up doing patrols with my brothers most nights and going down to La Push to see them. But the best thing about all of this was I was with Nessie, my Nessie, the most beautiful, funniest, smartest and nicest most perfect girl I had ever met. During the 3 years I had been with her whilst she was growing up we bonded, all throughout her life I was like her brother, her bestfriend, her protected and hopefully some day, if she wanted, her lover.
Then as she became a women I fell more and more in love with her every second I spent in her presence, Not being able to tell her how I feel is extremely difficult, hiding things from Nessie is usually impossible but on this matter she remains non the wiser. But I promised Edward that I would wait and see if she ever returned my feelings and that I would let her chose who she wanted me to be in her life, I would be that person for her no matter what my feelings.
I, to this very day, know almost everything about her; I know that she always frowns to herself whenever she disagrees with something that has been said or done, I know that during the night she sleep talks, just as her mother had done, I know that when she's warmer she a lot happier, I know that she would do anything to protect her family.
Those where some of the obvious things, but the little things where what made her my Nessie, like the way her beautiful chocolate brown eyes almost glowed whenever she saw me, like the way the left corner of her mouth always tugs up to make her smile her fathers grin, like the way she always crosses her arms and taps her foot whenever she wants you to know that she's mad, like the way she has her own smile that she only ever gives to me, like the way she bounces her knee up and down whenever she's nervous or impatient, like the way the little crinkle over her nose forms whenever she's upset or angry, like the way she always bites her lower lip whenever she's really concentrating.
I understand her like a book, her body language has become like a second language to me, me and no one else. I can read her mood, I can tell if she wants to be alone or if she wants to be held or if she wants to talk, and no matter what I would always do whatever she wanted, if she needed someone to listen, I would be there, I could listen to her talk for a whole lifetime, everything she said sounded magnificent. Her voice was lower then Rosalie's and Alice's, a lot like her mothers but it took Edwards velvet tone, it was a voice that you would hear in a crowd it would always stand out, drawing you in, almost hypnotizing it made you want to worship anything it said. Maybe it had to do with the perfect mouth that I came out of, Renesmee's mouth is exactly like her mothers but her lips, Bella informed me, are a perfect replica of her fathers.
Everything on Nessie's face is evenly distributed between her mother and father, her eye colour was Bella's but her eye shape was Edwards, her nose was Bella's but her jaw and cheekbones where Edward's, her hairline was Bella's but her ears where Edward's.
She resembled both of them so equally it was hard for other people to believe the story that was made so people wouldn't get suspicious on the new arrival in forks, To everyone else besides the Cullen's, Quileute's and Renee and Charlie, Renesmee Cullen wasn't Bella and Edward Cullen's daughter but that she was Edwards's niece who parents had died leaving her an orphan with no other living relatives besides her uncle who now he and his wife Bella had adopted. Nessie hates pretending that she isn't Edward and Bella's daughter but she would never let any of her family see it, only I could tell, even though she would immediately deny it if I ever asked. The only thing that made Renesmee look not completely the same as her parents is her hair, it takes on the exactly same colour as her dark brown chocolate eyes, "She's got Charlie's colour hair" Bella would always say, "You should see how smug he is about it too, it's the highlight of his life I swear".
Nessie's hair is stunning, beautiful long brown hair that is cut into a V shape and put into long layers that went to her lower back, her hair would always move as if it had a mind of its own; it would always sit perfectly right, it seemed as if there was never a hair out of place even when Nessie wore her favourite "messy" look, all she would ever do to her hair is straighten her natural ringlets and then wear it down. Nessie had a habit of always running her fingers through her hair so that her long side fringe would be pushed back then fall back to perfectly frame her Goddess like face. Every time she did it, I fight the huge urge to kiss her.
Occasionally when Nessie is out in the sunlight, tiny highlights of red peaked through the brown, they would make the natural dark brown look glossier, like a much darker version of her mothers hair, not many people would notice, but of course I did. I studied every one of her features time and time again and yet still every time I did I would always find some other tiny detail about her that made her even more magnificent.
She is something of perfection, something that I could never, and would never deserve, but I didn't have the strength to stay away from her, I need her.
She is my life, my everything, my reason for being on earth, my soul, my Imprint.
But these feelings didn't stop the fact that it was hard, that our differences, no matter how much we both mean to each other, where still there, Renesmee Cullen is someone who I was created to destroy, But I was destined to love.
To be continued..