To my anonymous reviewer, Chip MUNK, well, yeah, I really do need some happy Matt/Punk to make you happy. X3.

It is a sad ending I suppose…here's the very short last chappie. I know. I used the lyrics way too much in the entire thing overall but the lyrics are prior to the story...& it made an ending that I could like so...X3. The chappie's in MATT'S POV.


Chapter Thirty Six


sometimes, i wonder why i didn't die when you did.


You're no longer a wrestler.

How could I when all I could remember was you?

You're still in pain.

How do you move on when the only person you'd ever truly loved was suddenly ripped apart from your hands?

I w-w-w-w-w-want to die but I don't because I-I-I try to be strong.

I wanted to hold him one last time when I brought that body towards the ocean and my fingers were running through the jet black hair of his and I heard Jeff calling me insane but I knew what I had to do and I knew that I didn't want Phil to be buried underneath piles of crushed dirt, this was the course of our relationship and he wanted to be alone and he wanted to be special and he was special and the water was the only thing that based our relationship. It was the core, the soul, the heart of us all, stitched us both together and he belonged in the ocean.

I just laid the body down towards the water, the peacefulness of that face, his soft jet black hair scattered into the water, all damp, and I held onto his face. The insanity of me just getting worse and worse before I held onto that body and pulled him towards the ocean.

Our souls.

Our blood.

Our marks.

All in the ocean.

We will be lost forever from the world and I wanted this for him.

and your eyes are still s-s-s-so closed.

I looked down at that beautiful, graceful face.

and...open your eyes.

look at me.

breathe...for me...

breathe...for us...

d-d-don't make this end-

i can't believe he's gone.

You just can't understand why you're still alive when you're so fucking dead inside.


they just don't understand.

(matty, cheer up. he's in a better place now. he doesn't want you to sulk around after his death.)

he d-didn't want to die either!

HE DIDN'T!

IT'S SO FUCKING UNFAIR!

...and he still died anyways...

...gone...

...i can still feel him.

...air....

...Phil.


"Step one you say we need to talk..."

That song.

IS MADE OF NIGHTMARES.

I visited the water.

Ran my hand through the surface.

And I thought I heard you sing.

I thought...

Are you still here, my love?

I can feel...

b-b-breathe.

"Talk to me, Phil."

breathe.

The wind.

The water.

The hot sand.

He was everywhere.

Breathe.


everything froze.


I just stepped in the water.

Kept on going.

Choked myself.

Suffocating.

I didn't care.

All I could feel was Phil's body pressing against mine before I couldn't...

b-b-breathe.


and the sweet heart of you still beats.


I walked through the floaty clouds.

It was beautiful here, sweet scents and loving warm smiles and for one moment everything seemed right and then, I twisted my head and my eyes met his eyes, his beautiful olive eyes, after so long, a smile smeared on both of our faces as we embraced and kissed and... he leaned away, his eyes bubbling with tears, as his hands wrapped around my neck and I knew that life didn't matter right now.

I could feel him melting into my arms.

--I love you, Phil--

I kissed him on the top of his forehead. My angel of beauty.

--I love you, Matt--

No Jeff.

No stupid parents.

No water.

Nothing.

Just far, far away from everything.


just you and me...forever.


That was so...suckish.

But I needed to make an ending that wouldn't be too dark yet not too happy.

It was a mixture of both. I think?

& that would be the end of 'How to Save a Life'.

Thanks, sweethearts for all those who followed this fic, you guys are the best! I would tell you that I'm working on something else but I'm not...maybe I'm considering writing another one-shot...but nothing full-pledged until 'Twisted' or 'Alone' are completed. Thank you, everyone, for reading! You guys are the best! X3.

Til next time, darlings!

X Sam.