Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, I'm not Stephenie Meyer, and its very tragic and makes me want to cut myself (not really, but I like being dramatic) REVIEW AFTER YOU READ?! (:


Seattle. The crisp air hit my face bringing a myriad of scents with it. My throat tightened and I tried to put it out of my mind but it was difficult and it frustrated me. I'd stuck to my diet for over 50 years and I still couldn't seem to gain control of myself. I sighed and ran my fingers through my hair, a habit I had unconsciously picked up from the other men in my family. Or, what used to be my family. It was hard to call them that now, they hadn't done anything wrong but then that was the problem.

I was always the one to screw up, make us move. It was taking its tole on everyone and Alice, always living in the future instead of the here and now, had gotten tired of it. It had taken awhile for me comprehend it but now here I was not even a few hundred miles from the place it had really gone down hill. I didn't even know how I had ended up, why I was so drawn to the area. Masochism probably or maybe it was because I'd always just liked Seattle. I was betting on the former.

Moving away from the railing of the ferry, I swooped down and grabbed my bag from the floor before walking back to my car. It was nothing special, I had never like driving all that much. I definitely wasn't into flashy cars like the rest of the family. I leaned back against the soft leather of the chair and stared at the hovering storm clouds to pass the time. I had always thought clouds were fascinating, they changed so much yet they always seemed to be the same.

When the ferry docked, I put my car into drive and carefully maneuvered my way off. No matter how many times I'd ridden a ferry, I always had that fear in the back of my mind that I'd some how fall of it. Its not like I could drown or anything but the fear was still there and I was always careful. I drove through town and right to the outer limits were a grand house stood, it was beautiful, very obviously redone by Esme, and I was thankful she would let me use it. I took the few bags I had in the back of the car and walked swiftly to the front door.

The key to get in was an old one and it was worn with use but I liked it. The newer things got the more I liked the older things when time was simpler. Don't get me wrong, I had nothing against modern technology but when it was simple, it was simple and very few things could sneak up on you. Nowadays, it was like walking through a maze with something to hit every corner you turned. I jogged upstairs and dropped my things in the first room I saw, which happened to be mine and Alice's. Our scent was faded and barely smelled like us anymore but I took it was a good thing. I didn't want to be reminded of happier times. I wasn't that masochistic.

I knew it was time hunt, the burn in the back of my throat was becoming stronger and I didn't need any slip ups anytime soon. I pulled an older set of clothes out and changed before slipping my shoes back on and running out the back door. Since I was on the outskirts of town, I wouldn't be seen and I could run freely through the forest. The wind whipped through my hair as I sped through and I smiled one of my first real smiles in a long time. Running was always a good release, a time to be free and let go.

A familiar scent had me skidding to a halt and jerking around like a loon trying to pinpoint it. I followed it and ran into a path of dead animals, they looked like they had been scattered in a frenzy and they were all drained of blood. I don't think my eyes could've gotten any wider but they did when the scent got to its strongest point and I found the very girl I had tried to kill draining a large struggling buck. She reached up and snapped its neck before going back to drinking it greedily and then tossing it to the side.

Not noticing, she was off again running through the forest. I followed Bella until we hit the edge of town and she slowed down to a walk. The smells of city hit my nose and I stopped and bolted back into the forest looking for something to drink from. Bella had scared most of the wildlife off but I managed to find a small herd, probably made smaller by Bella, and finished it off putting rest to the fire in my throat. I disposed of the last dear and headed back in the direction I had followed Bella but when I got to the city, her scent was lost in everyone else's.

I cursed and sped back home, all sorts of thought running through my mind. Like how had she been changed and why didn't Alice see it? Or did she and decide not to tell me? I wondered if she had seen it and decided not to tell me because of Bella's reaction to me if she had seen me. Not wanting to worry about it too much, I started the shower and stripped my dirty clothes off. The warm water felt amazing on my back and I didn't ever want to the warmth to go away but it did and a lot faster than I would've liked.

After getting out of the shower and drying off, I headed downstairs and settled on the couch with a book. I can't really say what it was about but it was over too soon and my thoughts were still centered around Bella. It was frustrating not knowing anything but what I'd seen, I'd gotten so used to Edward and Alice always knowing what was happening that it had become regular thing in life, like washing your hands or breathing (for a vampire, not human.) I put the book down and settled into the couch giving in to all of the thoughts running rampant in my head.


Eventually I got to my feet, I needed to suck it up. There was no going back and bathing in self-pity wouldn't make it go away or make it better. I tried picking up my phone to call Charlie and not break it. I succeeded but I still left finger impressions in it. Very carefully, I pushed in the familiar number and held it to my ear.

"Hello?" Charlie asked groggily. I cursed under my breath and turned to look at the clock above the stove. "Hello?" Charlie asked again, irritated now. "Sorry," I apologized. We were both startled from my voice. I hadn't talked to anyone in awhile, not even myself and I wasn't prepared for my new voice. "Bells?" Charlie asked, "Is that you?" I swallowed.

"Yeah Dad, its me. I uh, I just got our message." I answered. There was silence for a moment, "Where've you been?" he inquired. I bit my lip, I didn't want to lie to my father but I knew it was necessary, I couldn't exactly tell him I'd been turning into a vampire and couldn't return his call. I'd be admitted into the psych ward. "I um, forgot to pay my phone bill?" My not so brilliant answer came out as a question and I winced.

I hadn't gotten any better at lying and it was evident. I was just glad he wasn't here with me, I really would've given it away. "Mhm," he said skeptically. "Well, I'm glad you called and I just wanted to know if you were still coming down this weekend?" My eyes widened and I desperately tried for an excuse that wouldn't sound rude. "I c-can't," I stuttered not coming up with anything. "Why?" He demanded sounding a little put out.

I sighed, "I'm sorry Dad but something came up and I don't know when I'll be able to come down." My situation sucked and I couldn't even tell anyone, well anyone that I trusted. He sighed too and grumbled out an "Ok," before telling me he had to go. "I love you," I managed timidly. "Love you too," he grunted and then he was gone. I took a deep breath and slumped over.

This was so much to deal with all at once, I had gone from a somewhat successful girl to a vampire with no one. I didn't have my dad this time, or my best friend, in fact I'm sure Jake would hate me now that I was a 'bloodsucker'. It just wasn't fair and I felt like throwing a tantrum and running a rampage all over the town but I knew I couldn't. It wasn't time to be acting like a child, it was time to face the facts and not just push them away.

First things first, I walked to my room and turned on the computer, thankfully a lot faster than my old ancient thing I had left at Charlie's. It was incredibly frustrating trying not to put too much force into my clicks and types but I got through it and in the end I was able to pull up my e-mails. I sighed in relief when I didn't see any from my boss and clicked on a new message so I could hopefully keep my job and keep my income.

Dear Mr. Kingsley,

I apologize for my absence but I came down with something suddenly and haven't been able to get out of bed. I hope you can understand and hopefully I will be back by Monday.

Sincerely, Isabella Swan.


I felt like it was the first time I'd ever typed and it though it was a first in my new body, I still didn't like it. I hated feeling like I couldn't do things, I had been the one able to do things for so long it was unnerving and put me in a bad mood. I e-mailed Renée so she wouldn't worry about me and then logged and stalked back out to the living room dropping onto the couch and breaking the frame. I slammed my hand down and ripped a hole in the fabric before giving up and fighting back a scream of annoyance.

I was annoyed at everything, annoyed that Victoria had chosen such a stupid punishment when I'd probably never even see Edward again. I was annoyed that I was letting it get to me so thoroughly and I was specially annoyed that I didn't know how to control my strength. Usually I liked the challenge, but now it the challenge seemed to be getting worse not better. It was incredibly infuriating.

Taking another deep breath, I reigned it all in and tried to think rationally. Acting like a crazy would get me no where and no where was not where I needed to be. I was trying to figure out what the best course of action would be, what would I benefit from the most and how was I going to take care of my parents. I obviously couldn't tell them about my current situation and if I just kept blowing them off they'd know something was wrong. I'm sure my dad already suspected something from my voice being different.

It hurt to even think about it but I immediately knew it would be for the best. I'd need to die, I didn't know how I was going to do it but it needed to be done. I shot up in my seat when I remembered the Cullen's. They had to move a lot, maybe something, anything in there house could help me out. I doubt they left much but it'd be somewhere to start and if I was going to pull this off, I'd need all of the help I could get. With my half-assed plan in mind, I stood up and walked to the door.

I really wanted to write more, actually I was mad that I couldn't xD but thats all I got for now. My next chapters will be longer I promise but I just couldn't this time. REVIEW, tell me what you think of Jasper's POV and if I should write in it again. Tell which point of view you liked better too. Thank you to all of those who alerted, favorited, and reviewed. It means a lot. XOXO Kionna (: