"In here Maze..." she shouted.
I was hyperventilating. I thought I was going to faint and made quick to scrub my tears from my face.
She turned slowly back to me and asked, "Why are you still here?"
I smiled and looked from her to the small boy at the door.
He was pale white and had green eyes. Lean yet full and with a straight posture. He looked between Bella and me and then I noticed that Bella was staring at me dazed.
"Edward?!" She gasped.
"Yeah... I'm still here... and I'm not going anywhere..." I said to her.
"Masen... Son... I'm sorry it's taken me so long to find you... You're... My hero..."
I could tell by the look in his eyes he couldn't tell what was up from down.
And all I wanted to do was beat myself up about it because the last thing I would ever want to do was scare him.
But I had.
He ran to Bella and hid his face on her chest.
And then the flood came back as tears cascaded down my face meeting my shirt.
Bella too hid herself from me. Her face in my small boy's neck holding him in place.
And then I did the first thing that came to mind. I sat on the floor across from both of them making myself smaller and less intimidating and just... waited.
I grabbed Bella's hand making sure that she knew that I was still here... reassuring her.
She jumped at the action but then squeezed it lovinly. I didn't let go.
"Booboo..." she called him.
I smiled and rubbed my eyes again with the other hand.
"Your Daddy is here now... Maze... you said you'd be strong... like him... can you look at me please...?" she whispered.
He nodded and lifted his head to look at her.
"Would you like to meet him?"
He nodded again and turned to look at me.
"Hello..." I said barely a breath.
"Hi." he answered with a smile which in turn made me chuckle.
I'm sure his lack of tears had to do with the shock. I'm sure his tears would come out soon enough and that would never be enough punishment. I'll be beating myself about this for all eternity.
"You are one handsome boy... has your mother ever told you that?"
He smiled back and nodded. "She tells me that she should have named me Edward... after you... She says I look like you and act like you. You have my eyes." he said pointing them out.
"I do. But yours are beautifully almond shaped like your mothers. She's beautiful isn't she?"
"Mommy is the most beautifest person in the world." he shouted hugging her and kissing her lips with a loud pop.
I wanted to hold him.
No I wanted to grip him so hard and maybe just maybe learn everything about him from just touching him.
I needed to feel that he was real.
To be certain that this was happening.
I had a son.
Bella and I had a son.
And he was here.
And I was here.
And he looked healthy and just perfect.
And he was smart.
He was in school.
They made a home together.
And I wanted to be part of their home.
He had friends.
And he loved me.
Bella loved me still.
She thought about me everyday as I did her.
She talked to me everyday... in her dreams, but hell that would just have to do.
And I needed to make up for a lot.
And I would!
Because I deserved a little bit of happiness. Especially for the hand that I was given.
Fucking built an empire of lemonade stands from all the lemons I'd inherited.
I reached out a hand to him, slowly, letting him know that it was okay for him to touch me. He jumped from his mother to my lap and although I wanted to crush him he crushed me. I cried some more as I watched Bella fall to the floor next to me and hug both of us.
"I love you both so much... I shouldn't have... I'm so sorry." I cried.
I wasn't sure that what I had done was worth it now. Surely it wasn't... but I wouldn't know any better.
That's what I learned about life, it is simply the unknown.
We stayed on the floor talking and sobbing and laughing until it turned dark and Bella had to finally get up from the floor and turn the lights to the room back on.
She showed me her apartment and we ate pizza on the floor of Masen's room because after I saw it I couldn't bring myself to want to be anywhere else.
The night progressed on and before I knew it Bella was on the rug sleeping while Maze's head was wobbling from side to side as he fought not to fall asleep; he must of gotten that from me.
I took them both to Bella's bed not wanting to part from either one.
I laid my son between us but my hand reached for her in a protective way as if she could run and leave me or worse be taken away from me again.
We would never be apart.
I laid there for hours just listening and watching both of them. The adrenaline induced by my anxiety never wavering.
My twin Alice was going to flip and go nuts once she knew she actually had a nephew, I don't think she saw that one coming.
My parents Esme and Carlisle were going to spoil him rotten.
Charlie would provably think about killing me, but after seeing what a gorgeous son his daughter and I made, he'd forgive me and thank me for never giving up and finding them.
And our friends... they would be happy for us three.
I wanted to call all of them and give them the good news. I just couldn't find it in me just yet. I needed this moment with just them first.
Maze woke up early around six thirty in the morning.
"Good morning." I whispered softly, "How did you sleep?"
First he looked for his mother and then he turned to me, "Good... I'm hungry." he said stretching.
First stretch... I thought to myself.
"Come on..." I said getting up, "Follow me... I'll make us a manly breakfast."
"Really? You can cook Dad?" he asked. And I instinctively closed my eyes.
I had wanted him to call me Dad or Pops or Daddy, hell I'll even take Papi or Old-man... anything... but all he did to get my attention last night was say 'hey'. I didn't think that I deserved the title, but I'd take it.
"What would you like to eat? What do you usually have for breakfast?"
"Well... My favorite is French toast... Mommy makes them real good. She even covers them with snow. I like to call it snow but I'm a big boy now so I should start calling it sugar... right?"
"You can call it what ever you like, but you're right it is sugar... And I promise that I'll learn how to make them for you Masen... but I have no idea where to start... maybe you can help me?" I asked not wanting to say no to my son... ever.
"Okay! But I have to use the bathroom first Dad!" he said bouncing in place.
"Go!" I laughed.
We both made breakfast; it took us over an hour to actually make it look edible.
Bella was fed breakfast in bed Sunday morning.
I heard her crying in the restroom and I wanted to go to her, but I knew that they were tears of desperation and finality of our situation, not sadness.
Bella and I talked that night.
She was now an English teacher at the same elementary school that our son went to. The money that I had given her paid for school and some living expenses for her and our son.
I didn't realize that I hadn't talked about James until she brought it up.
"Where is he?"
"He's gone." I said. "Charlie and I followed him to Canada... we tricked him into crossing the border back to Washington and that's where we nabbed him. You should have seen your father..." I said trying to lighten up the conversation, "He looked like Clint Eastwood in 'Dirty Harry'."
She cut me off, "I don't want details..."
"No, no, I won't... But you don't have to worry anymore Bella. And you don't have to hide either... okay? Bella?"
"Hmm?" she said taking my hand.
"We need to talk about us."
She smiled, "I've been waiting for you to come back to me Edward. If you still want me..."
"Oh God Bella." I said pulling her to my chest. Needing her to hear my beating heart. I stroked her soft curls out with my fingers. "I've been looking for you for the past four years. Every lead I got came up empty. Charlie finally asked me not to encourage him anymore. Only to call him when I knew for sure. There were so many times I can remember knocking on doors that I thought you would be behind. Only to have all my hopes shattered each and every time. But I won't talk about that or feel sorry for myself because you had it worse... You were raising our son by yourself. I have no idea how you did it. But thank you. I feel like a monster for having abandoned you." I finished.
"Stop! Don't do that! I understand why you did it! There were days that I swear I almost called home. I just wanted to buy two tickets and just leave and go back to Forks and just give up hiding. But then I'd turn and see Masen and I just couldn't put him in danger like that without knowing..."
"Don't blame yourself Bella! Please?!"
She shook her head as she cried some more, letting her tears stain my shirt.
"Do you want to stay here or do you want to go back to Forks? Cause I'll go where ever you and Masen go... I don't care..."
She looked up from my chest and smiled cutting me off, "I want to go back. I want to see everyone. My Dad, my Mom, your parents, my friends, and Alice... Oh GOD? I miss them so much... I want them to meet Maze. Let's just go..."
I told her how I went to school between searching for her. My dream of becoming a doctor downsized to a nurse. It was the closest thing I could be without disappointing my family or her and doing nothing with my life.
After finally reaching Forks, within a week it seemed like life just picked up and we all continued to exist.
Masen adjusted to his new life immediately.
Our family was smart enough not to overwhelm him... all except Alice of course, but her intuition led her to anticipate his needs. Within five minutes she knew exactly what to say and how to make him comfortable around her.
Thanks to my mom and Alice, Bella and I had a small but beautiful wedding only three weeks later.
Our first night together as husband and wife was just as special as our first time. The only exception was that we were man and woman now.
I thought it was silly that we had to wait, but even more ironic being that she was always the eager one. But the tide had changed. I'm sure though that I would have consumed her by now if it hadn't been for her impervious rejections.
But it was worth it.
Because I stood in front of her and I would have promised her the world if it was mine to give.
"I know I'm a simpleton mortal... but please believe me when I tell you that I will love you and follow you for all eternity my love... my Bella... You are my life, now, and always." I said to her.
She answered, "I would have waited an eternity for you Edward. Now kiss me and make love to me... It's my wedding day..."
"Our wedding day." I corrected her.
She was wearing a white simple nightgown that I knew she had picked. It was perfect. I looked into her eyes and somehow the tension that was swallowing me whole disappeared and left me serene.
I knelt before her in my black silk boxer shorts and snaked my hands under the long gown up to her panties. I wanted those off first. If it was up to me, she would never find any in our home. She smiled looking down at me and I swear I almost lost my composure. The effect that she had on me was pure adulterate.
She stepped out of them and I whispered an, "Leave the shoes on for a little while longer love..." while kissing the outside of both her ankle and then coming back to the front and kissing the top of her feet. She had to know that I was going to adore her always.
I stood back up and nervously played with her hair. I first pushed it back and then forward and then back again. And she said, "I'm still waiting for that kiss..."
"All in good time..." I teased leaning over her and finally joining her lips to mine.
Her lips were so soft on mine and I moaned just to feel them. I brought my thumb to them just to make sure that they were real. "Oh God Bella... I love you so much..."
She held on to me tightly around the waist "I love you Edward... please...?" she whispered against my chest and I knew what she needed.
I picked her up and carried her to our bed and heard her stilettos fall on the wood paneled floor. Not wanting any distractions I threw the pillows off the bed.
I laid next to my angel and facing each other I told her, "I can't wait to be inside you, I can't wait to make love with you my Bella."
I thought I was going to combust. All the reservations that she had before went out the window as she took me in her hand. I was already erect and sensitive and had I not taken care of it earlier I'm sure I would have busted.
"I can't wait to have this inside me." She whispered streaking her tongue out and licking my lips.
I couldn't wait another second.
I thrust my tongue inside her hot awaiting mouth and kissed her with fervour. She fell backwards on her back and I crawled over her like a predator; spreading her thighs and raising her silky white gown against her waist. Respectfully I brought my hands to her face needing to connect to her in a loving manner not animalistic like I was feeling. Although that was easier said than done. My skin below could feel the wetness and heat her body allotted.
After kissing her boundlessly and then gasping in pleasure after removing my lips from hers I desperately searched for the point that always drove her mad. The spot where her jugular vein bounced and sang to me.
"Bellahhh..." I said breathlessly yet shallow, "I can't... I can't take it any longer... I need you..."
She went to push down my boxers with her hands, "Take me Edward. I'm yours. Claim me."
I pushed my boxers further down and finally kicked them out from under me. Then I sat up and tugged off her gown. I moaned loudly at the sight of her perfect breast. After removing it completely from her, she floated down back to the bed and placer her arms above her head. She was completely yielding and acquiescent.
I held her arms in place with both my hands on her forearms. Most of my weight on both my elbows and knees on the bed between her legs though my body was completely pressed on top of her.
God... help me go slow...
I kissed my way down to her lips... to her jaw... and down to her mouthwatering neck. I swear I wanted to sink my teeth in her.
I listened to her fluttering heart beat before I took her rock hard purple nipple into my mouth. The skin around it was so tender it made it that much more provocative.
She started to stir impatiently underneath me... taunting me. I looked down at her opened and spread with me between her and I knew then that we both couldn't hold out any longer. I knew that I didn't need to test her, but I really wanted to finger her.
I caressed her clit with my finger before I swirled it around her opening. "Oh God Edward... Please..."
"Let me have this Bella... Please..." I said to her while pushing my finger inside her.
Her love sounds echoed through the hotel room and she pulled me in further as she arched her back.
I removed my finger from her and brought it to my lips. I tasted her on it and groaned loudly satisfied that I had that effect on her. My finger was covered with her cum.
I brought my hand to my member and situated myself at her opening.
Looking desperately at her eyes I mouthed and I love you and started placing butterfly kisses on her lips while she reciprocated.
But I had to stop. I had to see her once I entered her. "I want to see you..." I said knowing too well that she might close her eyes and she would be able to see me, I wanted her to see how she affected me.
I pushed inside her slowly. Her warm cum coating my head. Pulling back before moving forward I felt her so tight against me. We had talked about this. She had saved herself for me still after six long years. Knowing that I would find her and that no one would ever be able to complete me the way her heart could, I too had kept myself pure for her as well.
"Uhgmmm..." She purred as I filled her. The sight of her while pressing myself inside her warming my anxious body was too much for me to take.
Help me God... Let me worship her... Don't let me lose sight of loving her body tenderly... Help me go slow...
Once I was completely sheathed inside her I started to move in and out slowly. If I thought we had a great connection before, this would top anything I could have ever dreamed of. We fit perfect together as husband and wife.
"Ohhhh Edward... I never knew we could be this good..." she said with tears in her eyes.
I captured them in my mouth while I too teared-up, "I will make you feel this good for the rest of my life Bella. You're incredible... it feels amazing to finally be inside you again..."
She brought her legs around my waist and the movement and posture made me go even deeper. I could feel her walls coming down tighter around me and I picked up the pace knowing that she was coming. I looked at her and the little 'o' shape her mouth had was confirmation that my love was coming. Her breathing picked up as her breath fanned my face. I couldn't hold out much longer watching her climbing through her climax.
"Come... come with me love... pleeeea-zzze..." I said spilling my last drop insider her.
She screamed my name when she did and I could almost see the stars floating around her in her euphoria.
I hated to leave her warm enclosure, but I slipped out of her bringing her on top of me as I fell on my back onto the bed.
"I love you Mrs. Cullen... forever..." I said under her.
"I love you my husband... for all eternity..." she said on top of me.
We kissed for an immeasurable amount of time before we made love again.
Time for us was a slow flowing sand in an hourglass that we could overturn. It would never end. Because our love would be perpetual and enduring.
You see I can do fluff! Yeaaaaa! My first fluffy! Don't get me wrong I'm very proud of my Pervy-Smuttyness!
This has been ready for a while, but it just didn't seam right! And I was consumed by other things. But I hope you enjoyed and let me know what you think.