A/N I really apologise to everyone about my complete lack of updates, I have been so incredibly busy in Real Life that I barely have time to write at the moment, the stuff that I have done is on my Livejournal account and tends to be of the slash variety. I promise I haven't given up on this fic, I never start something without finishing it, I just have some time constraints! Anyway without further ado I have the latest chapter with a warning of slight slash, so if you're not keen I wouldn't recommend this however it is very very slight.
"I don't think I want anything just now" Harry said quietly as he reached the door, his hand trembling as he went to turn the knob. Everything with Molly had really knocked hin of balance.
Grasping Harry's shoulder, Blaise nodded "Go to your room and I will bring you something up"
"I don't think so, I should take it up" Ginny interrupted, her body pushing in front of Harry blocking him from Blaise's view.
Hermione watched as Blaise's eyes flared in anger, his mouth opening to say something when she decided to jump in case he said something he would regret. "I don't think it's a good idea for you to do it Ginny, your mother's pissed at the pair of you, do you really think its wise for you to take Harry's breakfast to him in his room?"
Watching the other girls shoulders slump in defeat, she shrugged muttering "Fine." Pushing past them all, she went into the kitchen, the door falling close with a quiet snick.
"Right, we all better go in and get something to eat before Mrs Weasley comes looking for us." Draco said, his eyes studying the closed door that Ginny had just gone through. Something about the younger girl setting him at ill ease. He wanted to believe the best in her but after everything that had been going on, he couldn't just believe her. "Harry, head back upstairs and we will make sure Blaise gets you something" he said softly, giving Harry a small smile as he watched the boy head back up the stairs. Turning to Blaise he grinned "Don't fuck this up Zabini and good luck"
Hermione wrapped her arm around Draco's waist "be careful with him please Blaise. He's just had a run in with the one person he views as a mother, and he's so fragile but will never let anyone know that." her face dropped into an unhappy look as her eyes stared up the stairs her friend had just walked up. She wanted him to be happy and to have someone else to talk to couldn't hurt.
"I won't hurt him I promise" Blaise said softly as they walked into the kitchen.
Staring up at his ceiling, Harry wallowed in misery, he couldn't believe that Ginny had fallen asleep in his bed, to him Molly was the mother he didn't have and the look of anger in her eyes killed something inside of him. Ginny was a lovely girl, one he genuinely cared about but she wasn't the one for him, everything all of them had gone through with both her and Ron gave him pause for thought. How could be with someone like that, a person so willing to change their opinon's so quickly yet at the same time, could he doubt the genuine tears she shed last night.
His eyes closed, everything felt as though it was against him, people, the war, just life in general…but there was something that wasn't, a certain person with chocolate brown eyes and a smile that lit up a room. Harry was confused, chuckling to himself, he opened his eyes and pushed up on his bed, confused was not the word for what he was right now. His feelings were so new and alien to him, he had never considered a relationship with another male before, could he? He was pulled from his thoughts when a soft knock came at the door "Come in" he called out sitting up completely.
The door opened slowly, Blaise's face peering around the frame, his hands full with two plates of steaming hot food. Pushing the door closed behind him with his hip, he made his way over to Harry, handing him a plate before standing awkwardly at the side of the bed unsure of where to sit. Silently Harry moved over, patting the space he made. A large grin crossed Blaise's face as he sat next to harry, both boys eating their food silently.
"So its been a weird few days huh?" Blaise said suddenly, his voice breaking the silence between them.
With a bitter laugh Harry pushed his fork onto his plate placing it on his bedside table, his eyes seeking out the ceiling once more as he spoke "Your telling me" they sat in silence for a few more minutes, Blaise placing his plate on the floor next to the bed when Harry was the one to break the silence "it's moments that like I love, the silence and solitude, that way maybe no one can come to close to me and be at risk. All I ever wanted was a normal life, be a normal teenager you know but I will never have that luxury, instead my destiny is to become a killer."
"Harry, your never going to be a killer…never" Blaise protested, his body twisting so he could lie on his side to look at the other boy, his eyes full of concern and horror.
Harry looked at the toher boy from the corner of his eyes, Blaise's face so concerned, longing over came him, a desire to turn and face the other boy, keep talking, bare his soul and then lean in for that kiss he so desired right now. Pushing away the thoughts, he shifted his body, mirroring Blaise's position, giving him the opportunity to stare into the deep chocolate pools studying him. Sighing heavily, he began to speak once more "how can you say I'm not. Is it not my destiny to kill Voldermort, no matter how evil he may be, I still have to take his life, I'm never going to be any better than he is Blaise. I hate the thought that my parents are watching me and are disgusted with what they see…with what I've become. I look at everyone else and see happiness, look at Hermione and Draco, they found one another in this time of darkness, Tonks and Lupin, even the Malfoy's…who do I have? No one that's who" he trailed off as his voice broke off at the end.
Closing his eyes, he swallowed back the tears stinging his eyes when he felt a warmth engulf his hand. Eyes shooting open, he stared down to see a dark hand covering his. "You have me Harry. I'm not going anywhere" he heard Blaise say softly. Raising his eyes, he met the other boys gaze, Blaise's eyes burning into his soul "I know how you feel Harry, but you need to let someone in or its going to kill you. You can be happy you know, if your willing to let yourself. You don't have to be alone" Harry watched silently as Blaise's free hand shakily came to rest on the side of his face, turning his cheek Harry sank into the warmth seeping from the hand cupping him.
"Thank you" Harry whispered, his own hand coming up to his cheek and resting on top of Blaise's. Soaking in the heat, he pulled Blaise's hand from his cheek lowering it to the bedspread all the whilst still gripping onto it. "I never really thought about this you know?" he saw Blaise give him a confused look "I meant I've never really thought of holding hands with another man, I never thought of leaning forward and capturing a man's lips nor get lost in the chocolate depths that watch me…yet I feel it with you"
Blaise's eyes widened, his fingers tightening on Harry's, "I've liked you for a long time Harry, a long time but lets be honest I was in Slytherin and you in Gryffindor, how could I ever be around you peacefully and then everything happened with Draco and Hermione and it gave me a glimmer of hope. I could make you happy…really happy, more so than the Weasley shrew, just give me a chance"
Pushing onto his elbow, Harry stared down at his pale hand caught in the grip of Blaise's dark one. Could he do this? Raising his eyes to meet Blaise's intense look, he made a decision "I'm not the easiest person to get on with at times, I have so many issues to deal with but I would like to do with you. This is all so new to me so you need to let me go slow"
"This is as new to me as it is to you Harry and I promise we will go as slowly as we both need. Thank you for giving me this chance" he whispered, his face moving slightly closer to Harry.
Feeling Blaise's warmth breath fan out across his lips, Harry moved forward, their lips just inches apart, both moving closer to one another. A soft pressure touched Harry's lips, his mouth parting slightly when the door banged open "We need to talk" an irate Hermione bit out causing both boys to jump apart, their faces flushed as they turned to face both Hermione and Draco. "oh shit" Hermione uttered, her face turning red as she realised what she had just interrupted "I'm so sorry"
"it's fine, what is it?" Blaise said, his face lighting up in a smile as he squeezed Harry's hand, a soft reassuarnace that this would be picked up later"
Draco came to the end of the bed, taking a seat, his face solemn "It's about Voldermort, there was more attacks last night, the Death Eaters took out both the Lovegoods and the Longbottom's homes, they are going to be coming here but on another a more positive note, we think we know how to get rid of Voldermort once and for all"
He stopped for dramatic effect watching as both Harry and Blaise's mouths dropped at the declaration…