Summary- Tag to Good God Ya'll. Sam contemplates his life without Dean. Beta'd by the wonderful Sendintheclowns. All mistakes are all mine.
The saying, you don't know what you've got until it's gone,was playing on a loop in Sam's head the first night he was away from Dean.
That phrase rang so true. He had lost Dean in death and that had hurt and ached in ways he never imagined but he still felt a bond with his brother. Even in death.
Sam knew even with Dean in Hell if he broke down the Gates of Hell and found his brother, he would be welcomed with open arms. In fact, that was something he could count on all of his life, no matter how bad things got. Dean would always be there for him with open arms.
But now that bond was broken, the assumed trust and love demolished. Sam felt he had no one else to blame but himself. He was broken and it was all his fault. There would be no big brother rescue this time.
There would be no words of encouragement about making it alright together, that together they were stronger.
It hurt in ways Sam never imagined.
All he could do was his penance for breaking that trust. To stay out of his brother's way so that Dean could fix the mess Sam had made.
Sam's only hope that was tonight if sleep found him, he might be able to escape his own personal hell long enough to dream of the past and the open arms of his brother.
A/N: I was listening to the radio when Journey's song, Open Arms came on and I had to write this. A big thanks to Sendintheclowns, for her support. More Kira's Revenge tomorrow!