Okay so, I had this idea in my head--it was annoying me so I had to get it out. I was planning on it being a one-shot, but..I don't know. I feel like there's more to it than that. I couldn't help myself. Oh, and if your interested in smut, my story, Indecent Affairs may appeal to you!
Chins up, my lovely fans!
The mystic light of the moon beat down on me between the trees.
Sweat dewed on the nape of my neck, it stuck my thin cotton clothes to my skin.
I was panting with exertion. The green canopy was barely recognisable under the dense nightfall. The air was thick with moisture and it felt like I was taking a drink more than taking a breath. It made my lungs ache with the effort.
The exotic birds were nowhere to be seen, the flowers all leeched of their rainbow of colours.
The mired ground my feet landed on was slushy and unpleasant. It had recently rained here. Trudging blindly through the Amazon rainforest held no perks. I was here for one reason and one reason only. To find him. With each sluggish step, my muscles fought against collapsing.
I needed to find him. I needed to. It wasn't just a distant desire anymore.
This wasn't a fantasy that I conjured up back home. I was actually here, searching, doing something. My mind had finally snapped from months of loneliness. I hadn't seen his face in over thirteen months—such an unlucky number...or was it?
Was it a sign for change, to take charge? That was how I saw it, anyway.
I had packed my bags, explaining to Charlie after graduation that I needed to travel abroad, I needed to get away from the suffocating greenness of Forks, Washington.
Only to begin a treacherous journey by night in more suffocating greenness, this place was suffocating in the literal sense. My lungs were working overtime to provide my exhausted muscles with oxygen. My heart pumped loudly in my ears, a whooshing noise. If it were deathly silent in the rainforest at night—that would be the only sound I would hear.
Yet the sounds of crickets and other numerous unmentionable beasts that lurked in the surrounding shrubs were deafening.
I was on a mud track, my faithful guides were two Ecuadorian men—both knew the land well.
The heat was sweltering even without the sun hanging in the sky like an open furnace.
My heart battled the whole way with my head. Was I making a mistake? Was I being incredibly stupid, going out on a limb and flying to South America to look for Edward after a chance encounter with his estranged sister, Alice? It was not healthy behaviour.
But I was already here, the decision was made for me after I set foot in this country.
I could not go back without him. I heard sounds of rushing water in the distance—the river. I craved some antidote to the hot air, my heated skin, my parched throat.
I was an amateur at jungle trekking, that much was already quite obvious to my guides, Diego and Javier. We left quite early, beginning a few miles south of where we were now. From the limited information Alice had given me—along with a plea to bring her brother back—Edward was in the unlimited mass of jungle in Ecuador, south east of the centre.
He was nomadic, he would be moving around a lot which would make it hard to find—impossibly hard. I tried not to look at the statistics of in fact finding him.
They were so slim—and I was still so determined. I couldn't let myself hope the best, because the best never happened.
Edward had taught me so himself, as had my ex-best friend, Jacob Black.
I had, much to Diego and Javier's perplexing, opted to trek during the night. They had insisted we tour the jungle during the day, but...there were certain things to consider when dealing with vampires and their shocking appearances in the sunlight. As much as it was beautiful, it was alien and frightening.
Given the superstitious culture in this country, and the fact that many venture out into this woodland, I assumed Edward would still remain vigilant, no matter how far removed he had become to civilisation. He would also most likely like to remain outside of the Volturi's attention.
As would I. We had begun with a plan, to start from the bottom, from the lodge I was staying at and travel north in gridded patterns across the thick wilderness so I could see it all.
My lone plan had nothing to do with seeing anything.
So, instead of arguing or putting my opinion on the table to send out search helicopters to find a rogue vampire, I settled on their professional ideas and followed them out into the unknown.
Unbeknownst to them, I was on a much different journey, one that I had embarked on out of love for a man, not love for travel or for this country in particular. If they knew my real motivations, I didn't doubt they would have me sent back to the lodge hospital in case I had an hallucinating fever.
I had to admit, though.
This trip felt like a hallucination.
The bright colours of this foreign land, so different to home—which I surprisingly missed, missed with all my heart—they shone out in every direction across the horizon, the food, so new and strange, the people, people I had never met.
It was all a surreal dream—a dream that would never end until I saw him. What will happen when I finally find him? Alice, infallible as she was, couldn't predict. I hadn't made a lot of decisions in regard to the moment, so she couldn't focus on it.
She had told me—no, promised me, that Edward only left for my benefit.
Telling me that he didn't want me, it was a lie embedded into my brain to make me let go of him. How could Edward be so daft? To think that something, someone like him could be simply erased from my memory, from my heart by mere words?
It was insanity!
So was trudging through the forest in South America looking for your vampire boyfriend who ran away from you a year ago.
But I pushed those thoughts aside.
And, as much as I wanted—so desperately—to believe Alice, I couldn't reverse his words, to construe them differently than the way he meant them.
Because I was sure he meant them. The frayed edges of my heart ached painfully at those thoughts and memories—It hurt...so much! It was no longer the raging heat or exhaustion that had me bending over at the waist, gasping for air. I was in agony, internal agony. But what I felt wasn't important.
Not anymore. He was all that mattered—taking him back to his family.
I told them that I wanted to find him—they had agreed so easily, knowing that a visit from any of them would only drive him further away. The last time they saw him was in February—in Ithaca. From their observations, he was far from the Edward he used to be.
He was distant and detached. He seemed, as Esme had so heart breakingly described, 'empty'.
I wanted to believe that our separation was the reason behind his woes, but I knew better, sadly.
Sometimes I feel I've been told too much, that I want to go back to being ignorant—more so than before.
I wanted to be happy in thinking reasonably, that Edward had loved me—emphasis on the past tense—and that his feelings had wavered.
There was nothing more to say other than that. But here I was, all-knowing. Edward had, possibly, shared feelings with me when we were together, but he just stopped feeling them. And as he had said, I wasn't good for him. I was holding him back, like dead weight.
He need to be rid of me to live his life because he hated pretending for me, pretending for everyone.
He is what he is, and he wanted to finally live it instead of living the illusion, the lie.
My birthday incident was the catalyst, the moment that gave him the epiphany—the realisation that I didn't belong. A fact that I had known for much too long. That, someone like me, Bella Swan, stupid, ordinary human, could never run with the vampire crowd and fit in.
It would be like placing a baby lamb with a pride of lions.
They'd either eat me alive—a distinct possibility—or they'll desert me.
I had hoped they'd eat me before they left me. The physical pain would be somehow easier to bear than the prolonged emotional turmoil I have suffered.
Diego came to a halt up ahead, noticing that I wasn't on his tail. "Isabella!" he called in his heavily accented voice. They both called me Isabella, a polite trait, calling me by my full name. His heavily muscled form stood before me then, placing a rough, calloused hand on my shoulder.
"Estas bien?" He asked with a concerned edge. Basic Spanish was all I knew.
I was fairly sure he was asking if I was alright. I nodded and tried standing up straight.
My halted walking had caught Javier's attention. The two, golden skinned men were both towering over me.
Giant men they were, Javier was also muscular, although he was not as tall as Diego.
They were both around thirty years of age, yet they held no signs of wrinkled or grey hairs--both with cat-like green eyes, rare for their race, and short, almost jet-black hair.
They looked as young as twenty.
They were both Spanish speaking, native to Ecuador, they claimed.
They were such gentle folk, always polite and helpful. It warmed my hollow heart to them. They sort of reminded me of Jake and his friends.
I sighed. Jake, Jake, Jake. He had been such a vital part of my life, he was my life support machine, he was my crutch, my life jacket or safety rail.
Once Edward had dumped me—I winced—that day in the woods, he had thrown me into a sea of oblivion and depression—Jake had been my bright yellow beacon, my life raft. He had saved me from killing myself. When I had left him back home, he was heart-broken.
When I had taken the Cullens back into my life—to Jake, it was the harshest betrayal.
He wouldn't answer my phone calls or messages. Billy was less than helpful.
And, to top it off, I got a mouthful from Charlie about how I shouldn't be chosing the Cullens—the people who abandoned me—over my best friend.
It wasn't true. I loved all of them, so dearly, well, I loved them with whatever was left of my heart, anyway. I was definitely not chosing sides. I was neutral. I was stuck dead in the centre. However, Jacob's bind to his wolf pack kept him from me, now that I was re-associated with my family of beloved 'leeches', as he so puts it.
I straightened my stance, adjusting the pack on my back before motioning the two men forward.
"Tal vez debería terminar de la noche." Diego said, placing a hand in front of me to keep me from stepping forward. I frowned and turned to Javier—who could speak English. "He thinks we should finish for the night. There is a hostel, about a mile from here...?" he offered.
"Ella podría venir con algo, se ve enfermo." Diego said in an offhand manner.
I raised a brow at Javier who was nodding in agreement to whatever came out of his mouth.
"The only words I caught were, 'she' and 'ill'?" I enquire, wiping my hand across my damp forehead.
Javier sighed. "We're sorry, but we advise that we stop for the night. You look unwell...and exhausted." He explained with an apologetic look in his eyes.
I frowned and my nostrils flared. "Javier, no! I want to keep going, I feel fine, really." I tried to defend, my voice rising an octave in panic.
Tonight was the night, I had vowed to myself. Tonight was the night we would find him. Had I known the ruthless maze of trees and vines like they, I would have gone without them. But, knowing myself and my tendency to trip a lot and the fact that I was no navigator, it was essential to have them with me.
These jungle-happy safe freaks were getting on my nerves.
Javier was pursing his lips, considering my begging to carry on or to go to finish up within the next mile.
"We will see how you are when we get closer to the next hostel." He reasoned. I nodded, fine.
Diego's hand shot out, grabbing Javier's in a sense of disapproval. I frowned, watching their exchange.
"Vamos a cruzar los territorios, Javier. El rojo de ojos se esconden más allá de las bestias." My head snapped up—my Spanish may be rusty, but I could understand a miniscule portion of his hissed words to Javier. Other than his name inserted at the end of the first sentence, I also recognized some other words, 'red eyed beasts'.
Could it mean...? My breath shook and my throat was dry, I was unable to form a question. What beasts were they talking about?
Surely not...? I mean...there are many throughout the world, vampires, that is.
But here? And if they were, how did Diego know? If anyone was ever exposed to the real life monsters, they would surely be exterminated within seconds, spare for me of course, probably the only exception— they would be void of life once they knew.
I wasn't even sure if I was thinking about what they were. Javier glanced at me nervously before slinking his eyes back to his friend.
"Los bebedores de sangre." He stated grimly to Diego who was watching him sternly, eyes like a cat. I held back a gasp—the sentence made sense in my ears. My ears were not tricking me, nor were my eyes in regard to the tense deliberation they were having in front of me, oblivious to my understanding.
That sentence, spoke in the foreign tongue, meant: 'The blood drinkers.'
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