A/N: An alternate, and highly unlikely alternative scene from The Electric Can Opener Fluctuation (which I have only seen clips from). Sheldon is probably very OOC here, but I'm choosing to put it down to his severe emotional distress :o)

Penny watched Sheldon sob quietly. Her attempts to make him feel better had so far just made things worse, so she decided to try again later. She needed to talk to Leonard, anyway. She wasn't sure what had gone on over there, but what she had heard so far had not impressed her. Nor had his reaction to Sheldon's distress.

"Ok, sweetie. I'm gonna go, cause I don't wanna make this any worse for you. Ok?" He didn't answer, so she stood and headed for the door. She was reaching for the handle when she heard movement behind her.

"Penny?" Sheldon was getting off the bed. He stood in front of her. "Thank you. For trying to make me feel better." He moved towards her uncertainly, then gentle encircled his arms around her.

"Aww, it's ok sweetie." She wrapped her arms around him and laid them flat on his back. She expected him to pull away quickly, but instead he pulled her closer to him, pressing her tightly against his chest. She could feel the heat of him through his shirts, and suddenly things felt…different. More different still when she felt one of his hands move to her hair, his fingers weaving into it and gently cupping the back of her head. It felt good though, and she shut her eyes, allowed herself to relax into his arms more. She wasn't sure what was going on, but she suddenly decided she wanted to find out. Leonard's image flashed briefly into her head, and with it a burst of anger at him. If he could treat his best friend like that, how would he treat her? She wasn't sure hooking up with Sheldon was going to go anywhere, but equally she didn't like Leonard very much right now and anyway, Sheldon's lips had found her neck and oh my God, that felt amazing…

She let out a sigh and moved her hand to his hair, grabbing a tuft and tugging gently. Sheldon lifted his mouth from her neck and pulled back, just far enough to meet her gaze. His eyes were huge and his lips moist and parted slightly. She stood on her tiptoes and pulled his head down, crushing his lips to hers. He steadied her with the hand on her back, then drove her backwards to the door, pressing her against it.

It was as though all the stress and frustration of the last few months was consuming her, and she was releasing it on Sheldon. She felt his hand move to her ass and her lifted her; she wrapped her legs against his waist and felt him groan as she ground against his hardening cock. Feeling him press against her was almost overwhelming; it meant more to her getting this reaction from Sheldon Cooper than it had any other man she had been with.

He stopped kissing her and suddenly the straps of both her top and her bra were being pulled down, leaving her breasts exposed. For a second he just looked at her, consumed with both incredible lust and yet surprise that she, Penny, was allowing him to do this. Then his mouth was on hers again, kissing her with a renewed intensity as his hand moved to her breast; cupping gently first but then kneading and teasing as his passion increased. He ground himself against her and moaned into her mouth; she pushed back against him and gasped.

"Sheldon. Bed."

He pulled away from her and hauled off his t shirts and pants in one swift movement, while she tugged off her top and bra and wriggled out of her jeans. She lay back on the bed, watching him as his eyes moved down the length of her exposed body. She could see his appreciation, both in his face and his twitching cock. He lay down next to her, facing her, and traced his fingers over the hills and valleys of her flesh from her inner thigh to her neck. She closed her eyes to savour the sensation, and when she opened them again he was cupping her face, his eyes fixed on hers. Her breath was coming out in gasps.

"Please, Sheldon…"

As if waiting for the invitation, he was on top of her, kissing her. She wrapped her arms around his neck, could feel him hard against her leg. She shifted position slightly to help him, and then he was pushing inside her. He seemed to move in slow motion; she felt every nerve ending fire, every tiny movement burning with incomprehensibly pleasure. She couldn't bear his patience any more and suddenly bucked her hips, burying him deep inside her. The resulting noise he made was so erotic, she thought she might come there and then.

"Oh God, Penny…" he muttered into her mouth. He had frozen, seemed afraid to abruptly remembered that despite his apparent aptitude for sex, Sheldon was actually a virgin. So she took charge. Wrapping her legs around his waist, she pulled his ear close to her mouth and whispered "Sheldon. Fuck me. Now." He did as he was told, pulling out almost completely before burying himself deep inside her again. He started slowly but it was clear neither of them could stand it for very long, and with her nails in his back urging him on he thrust harder and faster until the entire bed was rocking in tandem with them. Penny came first, harder than she had ever come in her life, and sank her teeth into his shoulder to stop herself screaming out. Sheldon slammed into her one last time and let out a strangled cry, burying his face in her neck.

After a minute, Sheldon rolled off her. For a while they lay there, neither speaking. Penny's head was spinning in confusion. Sheldon looked like he was lost in his thoughts, and she wondered how far the sex had gone towards distracting him from his original concerns.

From the living room, there was the sound of the front door opening. "Shit!" Penny jumped up and grabbed her clothes, pulling them on quickly as Sheldon slowly gathered his up. He moved almost leisurely. She could hear Leonard's voice calling out.


"Shitshitshit, Sheldon, hurry up!" He pulled on his tops just as Leonard knocked on the door.

"Penny? You in there?"

She checked about quickly for evidence of what had just gone on and, finding none, opened the door. "Yeah, hey. I'm here." She pushed past him. "I think I'm gonna have a lie down for a bit. I'm pretty tired."

Leonard looked at her, confused. "Er, ok. I'll see you later, I guess?"

Penny made a vaguely noncommittal noise. "I guess." She looked past him to where Sheldon was still standing in the bedroom. "Bye, Sheldon. I hope you feel better soon." He nodded at her and she left, head still spinning.

Leonard watched her go, then turned to his friend. "Erm, what happened there?"

Sheldon shrugged. As he did, Leonard noticed a mark on his shoulder.

He had a brief moment of wondering where the hell his best friend had managed to get a bite mark at the arctic, when it clicked into place. He looked at where Penny had just been stood; took in the imperfectly made bed, Sheldon's rumpled clothes. He suddenly felt like he'd been punched.

His voice was hoarse. "Sheldon, where did you get that bite mark?"

Sheldon looked him dead in the eye.

"Oh, that?" He walked up to Leonard, stood almost toe-to-toe with him.

"That was from Penny. What was the phrase she used, let me see…"

Leonard swallowed hard as Sheldon leaned close to his ear.

"Oh yes, I believe it was 'Sheldon. Fuck me. Now.'" He stepped back and paused to let the implication sink in.

Leonard felt sick. Two years chasing Penny, then literally on the verge of finally catching her, this. Part of him didn't want to know the answer, but he couldn't stop himself from asking.

"Did you?"

Sheldon sighed and narrowed his eyes. "Oh Leonard. Of course I did."

He walked out of the room past Leonard, who had slumped, broken, against the door frame, then turned and paused.

"But hey. Don't worry about it. I mean, it's not a big deal. Right?"

And he smiled.

Hey, revenge is best served cold, right?