Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto in any way, shape or form. Hence the term 'fanfiction'.
A/N: Readers of 'My Best Friend's Girlfriend' could consider this a sequel of sorts, if they'd like. Again, these two are about 14/15 here; the Massacre never happened. Enjoy!
Friends Don't Let Friends Cut Their Hair
"Remind me again why you think this is necessary?"
"It's necessary because you look like a girl."
"Not entirely," Shisui amended. "But your hair..I mean, look at it! It's so long-"
"I have never seen a need to cut it," Itachi replied, flushing a bit. But Shisui plowed on.
"-you keep it in a ponytail-"
"If I kept it down, it would get in my face, which would be a hindrance during missions," Itachi protested.
"If you cut it, then that wouldn't be a problem," Shisui retorted. "If I may continue? It even feels like a girl's hair; it all soft-"
"How is that my fault?"
"Interrupt me again and I'll give you a mullet. It's shiny, for god's sake!"
"Again, how is that-"
"The point," Shisui cut in, "is that I'm doing you a favor by offering to cut your hair. When I'm through, you'll never be mistaken for a female again."
Itachi raised a slim eyebrow, then sighed. It was impossible to reason with Shisui when he got fired up about something. "Well, if you're sure. After all, how bad could it be?"
Shisui grinned. "Don't jinx yourself, little cousin."
That afternoon they met up in Itachi's room. Itachi sat down while Shisui locked the door and glanced into a plastic bag full of what he insisted were "necessary supplies." Itachi raised an eyebrow when his cousin pulled a long strip of thick fabric out of the bag and came over.
"What is that for?" he inquired.
"Blindfold," Shisui responded simply.
Itachi frowned. "That doesn't exactly inspire confidence," he informed the older boy.
Shisui waved an airy hand. "Foolish little cousin. It's only so that hair doesn't get in your eyes." Seeing the unconvinced expression on his cousin's face, he sighed. "..And I want your new hairstyle to be a complete surprise."
"…" Itachi relented with a sigh of his own. "Fine."
Shisui blinked in surprise. "You're seriously going to let me do this? Without any complaint or banter or irritatingly smart arguments?"
Itachi shrugged. "I'd trust you with my life. Why shouldn't I be able to trust you with my hair?"
Shisui smiled. Then he started to tie the blindfold around his friend's eyes.
"Oh, but Shisui?"
"Just keep this in mind: I do know where you live."
A nervous laugh. "Right. Gotcha."
An hour or so passed. Itachi couldn't see anything his friend was doing, but he could still feel things. Hands running through his hair, something cold and slimy that he assumed was some sort of gel, tugging sensations, etc.
He could also hear things, like the crinkling of plastic as Shisui paused in whatever he was doing to grab something out of his mysterious supply bag.
After a while, there came a point where Shisui didn't seem to be doing anything. Well, if he put gel in, then it would probably have to set, Itachi figured; and he waited. And waited some more.
Eventually there was a rustle of movement; under the blindfold, Itachi could tell that his cousin was circling him, as if examining his handiwork. Itachi felt a sudden sense of foreboding in the form of a little voice that screamed What the hell were you thinking when you agreed to this?!...but he ignored it.
"Right," Shisui said cheerfully. "I think we're done here."
The blindfold was removed; Itachi squinted into the light as Shisui held a mirror in front of his face, backwards.
"Are you ready?"
Itachi could hear the grin in his cousin's voice, and the foreboding feeling intensified. He sounds happy, the fourteen-year-old noted. The kind of happy that cannot possibly mean anything good. An evil kind of happy. Pure, Shisui-ish evil.
Frowning now, Itachi answered, "I suppose so."
His cousin flipped the mirror over.
Itachi saw his reflection.
And Shisui snapped a picture.
Long moments passed in total silence before howls began to fill the air. Shisui was laughing-literally rolling on the floor laughing, clutching his undoubtedly pained stomach. Every time the howls started to fade, the older boy caught another glimpse of Itachi and caught his second wind.
Itachi was probably in shock. Who wouldn't be? After all, his hair had been perfectly normal the last time he'd seen it-long and black and simple, nothing ridiculous.
But this. This was the very definition of ridiculous. Perfection-and some semblance of normalcy-were religions of a sort to the Uchiha prodigy, and this was utter blasphemy.
Itachi continued to stare into the mirror, mute with disbelief. Any minute now he was sure to wake up from a very bizarre dream in which Shisui had transformed his hair into a two-foot-high Mohawk colored several shades of neon green and yellow. Two feet high?! He hadn't even known he had that much hair! And the colors! He was practically fluorescent!
Slowly waking from his trance, Itachi turned to his cousin, who was wiping tears of mirth from his eyes. "You face," Shisui gasped. "That was priceless!"
Worth your life? Itachi wondered darkly.
The door opened. "Nii-san?"
Oh, no. His luck could not be that bad.
"Nii—Oh." A small, badly muffled snicker. "Oh. Wow. That's..impressive."
Itachi's eyes narrowed as he looked at his little brother. "One word of this to Father," he growled, "one word, and I will shave your hair while you sleep."
Sasuke burst out laughing, which set Shisui off again as well. Itachi's face burned with humiliation, especially when Sasuke managed to gasp out, "Can't-take you seriously-with that-haircut" in between hysterics.
Contrary to popular belief, Sasuke is not an irrational person. He was aware enough to notice his aniki glancing around the room for sharp objects, and smart enough to make himself scarce in a timely fashion.
Shisui, on the other hand…
A/N: Oh…MAN that was fun! I love Shisui; the guy practically writes himself…Anyway, hope I made you laugh. See ya. XD