Disclaimer: Sadly, I don't own Ashes to Ashes or any of its characters. They belong to the BBC and Kudos.
Author's note: This is the first time I've tried a songfic. I'm a fan of ABBA, and when I listened to this song a few days ago, I suddenly felt the urge to write something about Gene and Alex around it. In my opinion the lyrics fit really well for the most part. It's also the first time that I've written an Ashes to Ashes story that takes place during the series.
Lay All Your Love On Me
Alex quickly made her way out of Fenchurch East police station, towards the red Audi Quattro that was parked outside. They were currently investigating an armed robbery, and Alex needed to ask one of the eyewitnesses some more questions. Only the girl she needed to talk to lived on the other side of town, and the plod cars were..well frankly they were useless. She didn't have much spare time, and she needed a fast car, something like Gene's Quattro. She knew he wouldn't let her drive it though, so when he went upstairs for a meeting with the Chief Super, she had sneaked into his office and snatched the car keys off of his desk. She knew he would be furious once he found out, but by the time he did, she would be halfway across town.
She unlocked the car, opened the door, and got in. She inhaled deeply. The car smelled of Gene; a mixture of the smell that was so typically his, combined with the smell of cigarettes and whiskey. Something Gene himself had classified as "man stink". On any other man she probably would've found it disgusting, but for some reason when it came to Gene, she found it strangely attractive.
Alex was about to start the car, when she thought of something; music! It was going to be at least half an hour's drive to the girl's house, so she needed some good music to entertain her. She didn't feel like listening to the radio, so she opened the glove compartment, to see if Gene happened to have any nice music. The glove compartment contained a lot of junk, but it didn't appear to have any tapes. Alex stretched her arm a bit further, and felt her fingers reach something. A tape, right at the back, almost as if it lay there hidden. Now why would Gene hide a tape in the back of his glove compartment? Alex thought to herself. The detective in her forced her to reach for the tape; she needed to know what was on it. Alex looked at it, nothing was written on it.
"Only one way to find out," she murmured to herself, as she put the tape in.
It started playing, and Alex couldn't believe what she was hearing: ABBA! Gene Hunt, the great Manc Lion, secretly listened to ABBA when nobody was around.
Alex had never cared much for ABBA herself, but the songs were catchy, and she found herself tapping her fingers along to the melody on the steering wheel. Lay All Your Love On Me started playing, and Alex's thoughts began to wander, mostly to Gene.
I wasn't jealous before we met.
Now every woman I see is a potential threat.
It was true. Whenever she saw Gene talking to a woman, any woman, she felt a sense of jealousy growing in the pit of her stomach. Even more so if the woman in question was attractive, and Gene seemed to take an interest. It was stupid really, they weren't even together, and she didn't even know how she really felt about Gene.
And I'm possessive, it isn't nice.
You've heard me saying that smoking was my only vice
Right again, apart from the smoking bit that is. That was obviously Gene's thing. She hated smoking, and though cigarettes were almost a part of Gene, she'd rather see him quit. Even though he was only supposed to be a construct, she still feared for his health. She felt very possessive of Gene, as though for some strange reason he was 'hers'. Completely ridiculous of course, he wasn't 'hers', not until she could figure out how she felt about him, and if he felt the same way.
But now it isn't true
Now everything is new
And all I've learned has overturned
I beg of you...
Don't go wasting your emotion
Lay all your love on me
If only she knew how he felt about her. She knew there was a definite physical attraction, there was no doubt about that. But Alex liked to think that there was more, she hoped that there was more than just a physical attraction. She was surprised by her own insecurity. She was normally quite confident when it came to men, and besides, Gene wasn't the kind of man she'd normally go for. Then why did she feel the way she did? Nervous, vulnerable even. She had never felt like this before.
It was like shooting a sitting duck
A little small talk, a smile and baby I was stuck
She didn't know how to describe the way Gene made her feel. Whenever he talked to her in that gruffy voice of his, his piercing blue eyes looking straight at her, it made her legs turn to jelly. If they had been dating, she would've been the easiest catch ever. She felt as though nothing he said or did could ever change the way she felt about him.
I still don't know what you've done with me
A grown-up woman should never fall so easily
It was ridiculous really. She was a grown woman. 34 years old and she was feeling like a bloody teenager.
I feel a kind of fear
When I don't have you near
Unsatisfied, I skip my pride
I beg you dear
She had been around Gene nearly every single day since she'd arrived in 1981. She realised it made her feel safe. He was her one constant and stable factor in this crazy world she had found herself in. Though she would probably never admit it to his face, she needed him. She needed him more than she had ever needed anyone else before in her life, and it scared her. How could she be so emotionally dependent on someone who might not even be real? Though every day she found it harder to believe that he wasn't real, that he was just a figment of her imagination. He just seemed too realistic to be anything but real.
I've had a few little love affairs
They didn't last very long and they've been pretty scarceI used to think that was sensible
It makes the truth even more incomprehensible
She hadn't been in a proper relationship since Pete walked out on her. She had been too busy with taking care of Molly and focussing on her career. And frankly, there hadn't been anyone who had really been able to pique her interest. Of course she had gone out on dates; once or twice she had even gone as far as trying to be in a real relationship, but it had all ended again after a couple of months. She just hadn't really connected with anyone, at least not until she had met Gene.
Cause everything is new
And everything is you
And all I've learned, has overturned
What can I do..
She would have to think long and hard about her newly discovered feelings. When she really thought about it, apart from her yearning for her daughter, and her struggle to find a way home, all her thoughts involved Gene in one way or the other. If it wasn't for Molly, she would have nothing to return to in her old life. The newness of these feelings both excited and scared her. She didn't quite know what to do with them. One the one hand she wished she would be courageous enough to act upon her feelings, to see how Gene would respond to her. On the other hand, it might be wiser not to, since she eventually would have to leave him again, to go back to Molly.
Don't go wasting your emotion
Lay all your love on me
Don't go sharing your devotion
Lay all your love on me
Alex pulled up in front of the house. There was work to be done, she'd finish her contemplation later. She turned off the ignition, and before getting out of the car, she carefully placed the tape back in the glove compartment, as though it had never been taken from its secret hiding place..
Thank you for reading. Please review, I would really appreciate it. xx