So with all of the things going on with my mother's health and general everyday life I stumbled into some major writers block with my other stories and ended up removing anything incomplete from FF. I apologize to anyone that had them/me on alert and I am hoping to get back into writing them once again sometime soon. Cross your fingers for me! I thought maybe I'd type out a few one-or-two shots to possibly get my flow back.
I also want to recommend an awesome story I'm reading, Age of Consent: My Summer as a Legal Intern by mylittlesecret84. As the title implies this one involves a teen Bella and a 26yr old Edward and the trials and tribulations that go along with the age difference and their love. Another really great one is Clipped Wings and Inked Armor by hunterhunting - it's got a lot of angst, but SUCH a good read. GO READ THEM! I swear they both are really great, especially if you're into some lemony goodness.
3 months, 22 days, 10 hours, and 22 minutes since He left me. I check the clock on the dash of my ancient truck and correct myself. 25 minutes. I'm on my way to La Push, once again hoping to distract myself from the aching hole currently residing somewhere deep inside me.
I can't watch Charlie look at me strangely one more time. There's no doubt now that he's thinking of shipping me off once again. He doesn't think I notice him, but I'm not totally oblivious to the outside world. I see the way he squints his eye's and cocks his head to the side, staring at me when he thinks I'm otherwise occupied. He hasn't been doing it as much lately now that I've been hanging out with Jake, so I'll just continue to do so, even though, honestly, I haven't been enjoying it very much.
I mean, yea, Jake is great. He's like my own personal sun, always trying to make me laugh or smile, helping me through the rough patches when something inadvertently reminds me of Him and the hole threatens to open up and engulf me.
But… Jake likes me. I mean… like like's me. I'm sure he doesn't think I notice, just like Dad. But I do. He's always trying to touch me in little insignificant ways, an arm around my shoulder here, holding my hand there, and while it's nice… I don't know. It's not the same. I can't think of him like that. I mean, I've known him pretty much forever, and thinking about him like that, leaves me feeling like I had been contemplating incest.
I shudder and crinkle my nose as I pull up into the dirt drive in front of the Black's home. I definitely won't be thinking about those things again. The creepy feeling it gives me just isn't worth it. I cut off the loud rumbling engine and climb out of my truck. I can hear Jacob's loud boisterous laughter coming from around the side of the house towards his garage. I begin walking towards it but my steps falter when I hear two other voices join in.
I'm not so good with company just yet, and the thought of the awkwardness associated with meeting strangers leaves me feeling drained. I turn around half-way there and make my way back to my truck, hoping to get away unnoticed. "Bells… Bells is that you?" I hear him yell from the garage and know there's no hope of getting away now and turn back, grudgingly dragging my feet.
He's standing there in the doorway leaning against it with his arms crossed against his massive chest. I swear every time I see that boy he's grown at least another inch or two, and today is no exception. I have no clue what Billy could possibly be feeding him, but holy crow, maybe I should have a few bites. I know I've lost weight recently and I'm pretty sure a good stiff wind could easily blow my 5'4" frame across town. I make a mental note to ask.
"You thought you could get away from me, huh?" Jake asks with a playfully menacing look on his face.
I attempt to smile back at him though I know it comes out little better than a grimace.
"Come meet the guys Bells. We've been waiting for you to show up so we could run to the store, I'm starving."
He takes the few steps left between us and grabs my hand, dragging me inside the oily smelling garage. The lighting isn't the best inside and it takes a few minutes for my eyes to adjust. I release Jake's hand and nearly collide with whoever it is that is now standing in front of me before Jacob wraps an arm around my waist and saves me from the impact.
I blink and inspect the boy standing in front of me. He is thin and willowy, though I can see he has long rounded muscled beneath the t-shirt he wears. My eyes continue their perusal and I find myself leaning my head back so I can examine his face. He is tall… like Jacob tall… maybe even a tiny bit taller. I feel dwarfed standing between the two. I finally make it up to his face and see he is smiling shyly at me. He has large brown eyes, quite similar to Jacob's, and cropped black hair.
"This idiot is Embry." Jake says in way of introduction and Embry lifts his hand in a small wave, still wearing the shy smile.
"Hi." I say softly and return his wave and small smile. Something about him puts me at ease; I can tell we could be great friends. Kindred spirits or some other strange mumbo jumbo as my mother would put it.
I pry Jacob's over eager fingers from around my waist and make my way to my usual spot in the driver's seat of his VW Rabbit. I plop myself down in a somewhat unladylike manner, crossing my legs underneath me before I realize there is someone else in the garage with us. I instantly blush in embarrassment. There is no possible way that my cheeks don't resembling bright red cherry tomato's right this minute.
I bury my face in my palms and groan when all three of them burst out laughing.
When Jake finally stops his obnoxious guffawing I hear him introduce the mystery person from the corner. "And that jerk is Quil."
I looked up hesitantly feeling someone's body heat in front of me and sucked in a deep breath. I was currently staring at the jean clad crotch of the obviously well endowed man/boy in front of me. I quickly clamped my eyes shut and was gifted with more loud laughter along with a warm chuckle from the god in front of me.
"You can open your eyes now sweetness" he said while placing a large warm hand on my thigh and gently squeezing.
I sucked in another deep breath at the reaction my traitorous body had to his deep velvety voice and the warmth of his hand on my upper thigh. A slightly familiar tightening in the pit of my stomach and dampening of my panties had me blushing even deeper. I cautiously opened one eye and peeked through my lashes half expecting another glimpse of the man meat I'd previously viewed.
Instead I was met with warm chocolate brown eyes rimmed with the longest black lashes I'd ever seen on a man, just mere inches from my own. My eyes popped open on their own accord and stared into his.
"Hi sweetness" he says, his warm minty breath ghosting out in a caress over my face.
I opened my mouth once, twice, and apparently my vocal cords have gone on vacation because I am unable to respond. I nod once pathetically, making a total fool out of myself I'm sure. He squeezes my thigh again and reaches out his other hand and takes one of mine into it, lacing his large fingers through my smaller ones. Strange sparks erupt and shoot through my body and settle between my legs.
"My name's Quil and you must be Bella; Jakey here talks about you a lot lately."
I nod dumbly again, afraid to even attempt to get the vocal cords working again.
"His description didn't do you justice sweetness; you're much more beautiful than he let on." He said bringing his upper body impossibly closer to mine.
His scent wafts around me, a warm woodsy scent somehow tinged with rich vanilla, and I have to fight the crazy urge to unfold my legs from underneath me and wrap them around his body. I attempt to drop my eyes down to my lap, feeling a bit overwhelmed by my out of control hormones, only to have them blaze out of control. He was shirtless and every one of his chest muscles where well defined and bulging. I let my eyes travel over his chest and down his arms; they were just as well muscled, making my mouth water with their deliciousness.
I make out some distant voices speaking and realize we aren't alone and jump a little when his hand slides down my thigh as he stands up still holding my hand and pulls me up and out of the car to stand in front of him. He doesn't take a step back and I can't help but be pressed completely against him. I notice that unlike Jake and Embry he is closer to my height, still taller than me, maybe 5'10" and I surprisingly find it refreshing. What he lacks in height he obviously makes up for with the sheer broadness of his chest and shoulders. He is easily at least 3 of me and pure muscle.
"Ok asshole, dial back the man-whore charm a bit and stop monopolizing Bells." Jake says grabbing my free hand in his and punching Quil's shoulder none too gently.
I stumble a bit in true Bella form as he takes off out of the garage, dragging me behind him, still holding Quil's hand tightly in mine.
"Wh… where are we going" I ask somewhat squeakily, my vocal cords managing to make their presence known again.
Jake looks over his shoulder at me like I'm a complete idiot and I've suddenly sprouted a second head. "The store Bells… Remember? Hungry? Growing boy? I'm pretty sure we just went over all of this not even 5 seconds ago."
Hmm... those things must have been discussed while I was in Quil land, because I definitely have no recollection of any of those things being said. 'Snap out of it Bella', I chastise myself mentally. 'You know you just heard Jake call him a man-whore, and you obviously just experienced him working some of his magic, Hell-o, your panties are still wet from it Bella. Is that what you really want?' I think about it, and then I think about it some more, and I'm shocked to discover I do.
He never wanted to touch me, never wanted to move beyond holding me and chaste kissing. I could do this… I would do this. If Quil wanted to work his man-whore charms on me, I would take advantage of it. We could mutually use each other. I could distract myself from the dark abyss inside me, and he could get some.
I shook my head slightly, shaking myself out of my thoughts and back into reality. We were walking down the road that led to Jake's house, heading towards the store I'm assuming. I must have been thinking really hard because I was now sandwiched between Jake and Quil. Jake's long arm is draped across my shoulder and Quil's beefy arm wrapped around my waist, clutching me tightly to his side. He's looking over and down at me and I smile the first real genuine smile I've smiled in months.
We continue walking in a companionable silence and I bravely slide my arm around Quil. I peak over at him and notice he has a huge grin on his face now. It really is quite nice, his lush warm lips exposing bright white teeth against the russet color of his skin, my body reacts again and I know these panties are ruined. He affects me so easily I wonder if he could possibly be having the same reaction to me.
I lazily run my fingernails against the bare skin of his lower back; he stiffens slightly and the hand resting on my hip squeezes in response. I ghost my fingers up the smooth plains of his back, relishing in the sensual velvet over stone feeling of him, and then none too gently rake my nails down his back to the waistband of his jeans. His breath forces out quickly as a hiss between his still grinning lips.
From the corner of my eye I notice Jake looking questioningly back and forth between the two of us, clearly wondering what was going on. Quil chose that exact moment to slip his hand beneath the fabric of my shirt, coming in contact with my bare skin. The heat of his hand feels so wonderful I can barely contain the moan wanting to break free from my lips and instead clear my throat, forcing out a weak cough. Jake looks directly at me and raises an eyebrow with something akin to a half smirk half frown on his face and cocks his head to the side glancing at the obvious bulge underneath my shirt and my face, probably trying to see if I need him to cease Quil's horn-dog ways.
I simply shrug my shoulders against his arm still draped there. I'm a big girl now, I don't need saving. Well… at least not from Quil.
"Keep that up sweetness and you might not like the consequences." Quil says quietly, leaning down to bring his lips next to my ear. His hot breath on my skin and in my ear sends chills down my spine, giving me goose bumps.
"Oh, I think I just might, and I know you will." My mouth spurts out in a husky seductive tone before my brain has a chance to think. I blush, not knowing exactly where that particular bit of bravery came from. Hell, I'm unsure where exactly the whole sex-kitten purr just came from too. This man/boy seems to have some kind of out of control effect on my libido.
We arrive at our destination and as we're walking up the steps to the small convenience type corner store I quickly slip my hand into Quil's back pocket and squeeze the firm flesh of his backside.
"You're playing with fire" he growls under his breath, walking his fingers slowly up my rib-cage until it rests just against the lace edge of my underwire bra.
'Please go higher, go higher Quil, touch me.' I chant in my mind, my breasts becoming full and heavy with anticipation of his touch. His hand stays immobile all except for his thumb which rubs back and forth teasingly against my bra. I barely notice as Jake drops his arm from my shoulders and follows Embry inside the store, leaving me and Quil alone out on the small porch.
He takes a few steps and positions his back against the wall, leaning against it slightly with his legs spread shoulder width. He maneuvers me between them with the hand still under my shirt. His free hand wraps around my back and pulls me tightly against his chest. I slide my hands up between us, splaying my fingers on his warm chest. I can feel his heart beating almost as erratically as my own under them.
I stand on my tippy toes, brushing my aching breasts against him, bringing me closer to his ear. He leans down bringing my desired target closer.
"I want to be burned" I whisper in that husky voice again and take his earlobe between my lips, sucking on it lightly for a moment before dragging my teeth across it. I feel the rumble of his growl beneath my fingers on his chest.
He leans back staring at my face intently with those brown eyes. "You done this before?" he asks gently.
"No" I answer truthfully, "but I need to forget and I think you can help me do that."
He searches my eyes and apparently finds what he's looking for because he moves the hand from my ribs to between my shoulder blades still under my shirt and presses me tightly against him. His face descends the few inches to mine, brushing his soft warm lips hesitantly against mine repeatedly. This slight touching shoots tingly sparks of electricity through my lips until I can no longer bear it. I can't take the light touching, it reminds me too much of Him.
I rake my nails up his chest and around his neck to pull him down to me. "Do it right" I nearly growl against his mouth in my frustration and need to forget.
I feel his lips spread across his face in a large smile. "In due time" he chuckles before he sucks my bottom lip between his own, dragging his teeth across it less than gently. The tingly sparks from before are replaced with a full blown fire as he soothes the ache from his teeth with his tongue.
I hear panting and it shocks me when I realize it's coming from my own mouth, until I hear that I'm not the only one.
His suddenly searing hands move down to grip my ass, kneading it rhythmically. A whimper escapes my mouth when I feel his fingers brush against my core from behind. My body is heated beyond comprehension and I can feel the moisture between my legs seeping out to dampen my jeans. I rub my thighs together trying to alleviate the throbbing of my core.
He leans down as his hands slide down to the back of my thighs and he grabs me, lifting me up and I instinctively wrap my legs around him, locking my ankles. He turns us around, pressing my back against the wall and his rock hard length against my core. He rocks his hips against me slowly and breaks our kiss, breathing heavily.
His eager lips attack my neck, sucking, licking, and biting at the pulse point just below my ear. My head drops back giving him more access as I go into sensory overload.
"I want you sweetness" he moans hoarsely against my neck. "I live behind here and no one's home. Can I take you to my place?" he asks squeezing my thighs and rocking against my core one more time, increasing pressure.
The moan that leaves my mouth is nothing less than shameful as I nod. My whole body is on fire and I've never felt like this before. I want to feel nothing but his bare flesh against me, around me, and in me.
I'm jostled slightly and notice that we are no longer standing on the little porch of the store, but walking around the side of it quickly, his mouth still heatedly working my neck.
"Bells? Bells!" I hear Jake call out frantically and my eyes snap open to see him and Embry standing there with shocked looks on their faces. They look so comical I almost laugh.
I lift one of the hands from Quil's neck and wave a little.
"Head back to your place Jake, we'll be there later" Quil says breaking away from my neck to call back over his shoulder while picking up his pace.
Wanna hear something that really blows? I had this whole thing done, all 8,000+ lemontastic words, and I went to split it into two chapters, you know – highlighted it, then control+C so it's on my clipboard, and then what do I do? DUMBASS me went to check on the spelling of a word and control C'd the correct spelling, thus obliterating the second half of my story into gone forever never to return land.
I swear, sometimes my own stupidity amazes me. I'm currently in the process of re-writing the second half of this, and should more than likely be done in a few days.
I know this pairing isn't necessarily everyone's cup-o-tea, but I'd really appreciate reviews!