TITLE: "Sugar and Spike and Everything Nice" (1/1)
AUTHOR: Marie-Claude Danis
EMAIL: mc@fangy.net
SITE: http://fangy.net
ARCHIVE: List archives, otherwise just let me know.
SPOILERS: "Innocence", and general S6.
RATING: PG
PAIRING: Spike/Dawn friendship.
SUMMARY: Big brother Spike at his best.

* * *



The kitchen door was shoved open then slammed shut, something Spike vaguely registered through his Buffy-high. Lips lingered lovingly against each other until they both turned to face she who had rudely interrupted their morning make-out. But Dawn was already out of sight.

"Going to my room! Bye!"

Buffy was about to protest her sister's late - early? - arrival when Spike caught something in the air and pushed her out of his way as he went after her junior.

"Spike?"

"Be right back, luv-- DAWN!"

The teen hurried her pace at his thundering exclamation, and rushed up the stairs. "I'm sorry I didn't come home! I won't do it again!" She ran to her room and closed the door behind her - only to meet resistance when a strong arm kept it open.

Dawn peered at him through the gap and gave him her best innocent, "What?"

"You had sex!" he spat out in an accusatory whisper.

Dawn paled. "I did not!"

"Did too!" He leaned in and sniffed at her.

She jerked back. "Stop doing that! It's creepy!"

"You had sex! You had stupid seventeen-year-old sex with a pimply little boy who'll scream like a girl when I rip his dick off!"

"SSHHH!" She pulled him inside her room and closed the door behind them.

He stood by her bed in his jeans and nothing else, scowling at her in a very good imitation of Joyce Summers at her most pissed off. He even put his hands on his hips. She would've laughed had he not looked so mad.

She scrambled to him, pleading. "Please don't tell Buffy!"

"What IS it with you girls nowadays??"

Dawn glared at him, hurt. "Hey!"

"I mean, Buffy getting all groiny with the Angel-poof when she was barely out of the crib-- In my day--"

Dawn sputtered. "Ooh, in your day what, grandpa? When exactly did YOU become less respectable, Spike?"

A flush suddenly crept to his cheeks. "I, I don't think that's, that's a very appropriate conversation for a girl your age," he stuttered.

Dawn's eyes went wide. "You were a virgin!! You were a virgin when you got turned!!" she exclaimed triumphantly, bouncing on her heels.

It was Spike's turn to glare at her. "Want to say it a bit louder, pet? I don't think Buffy heard you."

Dawn was gasping for breath, bent in two, unable to respond.

Spike huffed. "And I think you're trying to change the subject!"

A comment met with a resounding snort as Dawn wiped the tears from her eyes. "Alright. Yeah, so I had sex. You're hardly in a position to lecture me, 'big boy'."

"Okay, a) you weren't supposed to hear that, and b) who'd you have sex WITH, Lolita?"

Dawn smiled mysteriously. "Someone."

"Someone you know?"

"I wouldn't do it with a stranger, Spike. Gross."

"You were careful?"

She rolled her eyes. "Yes."

"Alright. Fine. I let you off the hook. Under two conditions."

"Spi-ike!"

"TWO CONDITIONS."

She crossed her arms over her chest and raised a daring brow at him. "Let's hear it."

"Number one," Spike counted on his fingers. "You tell Buffy. You girls sit down and have one of them little girlie talks. Discuss the birds and the bloody bees, compare notes, I don't care. But you tell her."

Bah, nothing to it. She was going to anyway. "Fine. What's the other condition?"

"Number two, you give me this bloke's street address so I can... send him a fruit basket. Yeah."

"Ha. No way."

"Oh you bet your ass way." He crossed his arms over his bare chest, imitating her confrontational stance perfectly (really, this whole thing with him and the Summers women mannerisms, it was kinda creepy).

She held his gaze stoically for a moment, then cracked a smile. "You can have a name."

Spike peered at her suspiciously. "Alright..."

"Tara Maclay."

"Yeah, what about the witch?"

Dawn stared at him, waiting for him to clue in.

"Oh. *OH*."

"Yeah."

Spike considered this, scratching his head. "Well."

"So you gonna go trample her petunias or something equally evil?" she snarked, both amused and relieved at his reaction.

"I think not. You'll find you live a much happier life if you steer away from jerking witches around."

"..."

He held up his hand. "Don't even-- I don't want to know!" He paused. "Oh that's a huge-ass lie."

Dawn laughed and swung the door open behind her. "Ew. I'll pretend you didn't just say that. You're such a guy, Spike."

He strode past her and into the hallway, puffing his chest and affecting an unnaturally deep voice. "Yes. I am manly."

She shoved him the rest of the way out. "Go make out with my sister or something. You're grossing me out!"

He reached out and patted her head, putting his free hand over his heart with mocked emotion. "My little bit's all grown-up."

"Your little bit is sticky and sore and needs to go take a bath."

Spike made a face and grinned. "I'm liking this. You keep having sex with girls, they smell better anyway."

"Out!"

"Hey Dawn?"

"What."

"Mind if *I* tell Buffy about this?"

"You're a cruel, cruel man."

"I try. Very hard. I really do."



END