Super Mario Sketch show episode 3
By Stephen Paget
Mario: Hey everybody! It's the Super Mario Sketch show! Da da da da dah!
Announcer: And now everybody! Luigi's Mansion with more logic and common sense!
Scene : Luigi's house. Luigi is drinking a mug of coffee, from a plain ordinary mug and not a talking mug in the last episode, when he hears the mail. He goes to get it.
Luigi (going through mail): Let's see….Bill…bill. Huh….what's this. Congratulations Luigi! You've won a mansion! Oh great! More junk mail…this is just like those annoying pop-ups ads on the internet that tell you you've won a million gold coins. Well I'm not fooled!
Luigi chucks the bill in the bin and then sits back down.
Luigi: Thank god, I used some logic, that mansion could have been a pedophile's trap or something.
Scene: The Haunted Mansion. King Boo and a purple ghost are waiting.
Purple Ghost: I don't think Mario and Luigi are gonna show.
King Boo: Damn it! I really wish I could show Luigi I have the hots for him! I picked my best outfit!
Purple ghost: Dude, he's a living human, and you're an enormous white ghost! It wouldn't work out!
Announcer: and now a life lesson.
Mario is walking along level 1 of Super Mario Brothers. He punches a block which releases a magic shroom. He picks up the shroom and eats it and becomes Super Mario.
Mario: Mmmmmm……this is what an everyday normal person would do, just eat enormous magic shrooms that move along the floor.
Mario's eyes suddenly widen and then he throws up! He then passes out on his vomit.
Announcer : Remember kids! Don't be like Mario and say no to drugs!
Announcer: And now it's time for Luigi's random thought of the day!
Toad: A gold coin for your thoughts, Luigi?
Luigi: What's the deal with Bub and Bob out of Bubble Bobble? Why are they always being turned into bubble dragons? What's the big story of the series? Why do they get turned into bubble dragons and for what purpose? And in Rainbow Islands where exactly did they learn to shoot rainbows out their hands? Are Taito high on drugs or what?
Toad: Luigi here's 10 gold coins. Next time I ask don't bother!