Believe me, it's ok.

Really, it's fine.

That you tell her and not me. That you go to her for comfort and not me. It's alright. I understand. You love her, yes? And the time spent with Sakura must be precious. I have nothing against that.

But Natsume, can't you — at least — tell me not to worry? Can't you tell me that you're fine? I'm so tired, Natsume. Tell me to stop being concerned. Say it to me, that you don't need me anymore. I can handle that.

I knew, right from the start, I can't ease you from this burden… that with the weak me, I'm not enough. And it brought so much happiness to me when Sakura-san came to our lives. It's not because I like her nor was it because she's funny.

Well, because finally, someone can make you smile again — finally, someone can save you from your nightmares. Yes, I do feel a little sad, that it's not me who can lift you up from this wasteland, but she. The happiness that you deserve; I know only she can satisfy it…

…and not me.

I understand that you go to her and tell her everything that I need to know. But did you know, Natsume? I'm just as worried as her; maybe even much more than that. I could go insane just by thinking.

So… Natsume, do me a favour and tell me stop being your friend. I pity myself now. Please, just do this little step for me; so I won't be expecting any more answers from you whenever I ask 'are you alright?', so you won't tell me to shut up when I'm nagging at you, so I won't be waiting for you every night in your room while you're out in your missions, so I won't be skipping meals, and just so I won't be feeling as if I had lost.

It'll be okay, for sure.

Just believe me, Natsume.

Ruka Nogi