Description: The last time Bella spoke to Edward was when she left their band, seven years ago. What will happen when they meet again, and old feelings rise to the surface?

Chapter 1 BPOV

Song: "How a Heart Breaks" by "Rob Thomas".

Disclaimer: The twilight saga belongs to Stephenie Meyer.

Don't you wanna go for a ride
Just keep your hands inside
And make the most out of life
Now don't you take it for granted

Life is like a mean machine
It made a mess outta me
It left me caught between
Like an angry dream I was stranded, I was stranded

And I'm steady but I'm starting to shake
And I don't know how much more I can take

This is it now
Everybody get down
This is all I can take
This is how a heart breaks
You take a hit now you feel it break down
Make you stay wide awake
This is how a heart breaks

"Bella! Turn that down!" Rosalie screamed at me from her bathroom. Her command was followed by Jasper's laughter.

I pretended I couldn't hear her and turned the music up louder. I sand along with it, but my voice was drowned in the blasting song.

Don't you wanna go for a ride
Down to the other side
Feels so good you could cry
Now won't you do what I told you
I remember when you used to be shy
Yeah, once we were so fine
You and I why you gotta make it so hard on me

And I'm sorry but it's not a mistake
And I'm running but you're getting away

This is it now
Everybody get down
This is all I can take
This is how a heart breaks
You take a hit now you feel it break down
Make you stay wide awake
This is how a heart breaks

Yeah, this is how a heart breaks

You're not the best thing that I knew
Never was never cared too much
For all this hanging around
It's just the same thing all the time
Never get what I want
Never get too close to the end of the line
You're just the same thing that I knew back before the time
When I was only for you

Rose threw my bedroom door open and marched right up to my expensive stereo system. It took her a while to figure what button turned it off, but she finally succeeded and silence filled the room.

She turned to glare at me, but I only laughed.

"We do have neighbors you know," she warned.

"Were they complaining?" I asked.


"Excellent," I laughed.

She shook her head. "God, you and your music Bella. Sometimes…" she trailed off, shaking her head.

"Sometimes what?" I asked, a smile still on my lips.

"Sometimes I wonder why you work in an office when you obviously have a passion for this."

The smile instantly fell from my lips. "Maybe it's because I don't have a passion for music."

"And maybe I know there's something you haven't told me, despite us being roommates for the past five years," she shot back. I grimaced. She was too observant sometimes.

Still, I put my poker face in place. "And how long have you had that theory?" I asked coolly.

Rosalie rolled her eyes. "Oh please, Bella, don't try to pretend you don't know what I'm talking about. I know you better than that."

"How long?" I pressed.

"Almost as long as I've known you," she said flatly.

I completely forgot about my poker face and dropped my jaw. "What?"

She raised an eyebrow.

"And you're only bringing it up now?" I asked in disbelief. She only shrugged.

"God, Rose—" I started to say, but she cut me off.

"I knew you would tell me when you were ready," she said nonchalantly, like we weren't having the most serious conversation of our friendship.

"Does that sill hold?" I asked quietly.

She sighed heavily. "I'm your best friend, Bella. I'm not going to say no, but I wish you'd let me know this part of you that you've been hiding. Just realize that I won't judge you or take sides or whatever."

I nodded. Rosalie was a better friend than I deserved.

"Got it?" she demanded, turning back to the tough, bitchy Rosalie I knew best.

"Sure do," I promised.

She smiled a genuine smile at me. "Good."

She started for the door, but paused and then turned back to me. "I know you're not working today and we were going to do something together, but I have to run an errand for my mom."

She could see the question in my eyes and continued speaking.

"She got her license suspended and needs me to pick something up from the other side of the city."

I laughed. "How did she—"

"She made me promise not to tell anyone," Rose said. I couldn't help but laugh again. Rosalie's mom was almost exactly like her daughter; crazy, tough, funny, but still incredibly loving.

"Okay, well Jasper and I will see you this afternoon, right?" I asked.

She nodded. "Yeah, for sure. I'll be back around two. Sound good?"

"Yep. See you then," I called as she left my room. I plunked down on my bed and sighed.

Of course Rose would have noticed how the subject of music as a career would make me feel like I was drinking a bottle of vinegar. How could I have hopped otherwise?

I wasn't worried about Rosalie's reaction to the 'incident of senior year', as I liked to call it, but it would reopen the wounds I had closed years ago. I knew that I had to tell her. She had told me every little fact about her, happy and sad, scary and comforting. It was only fair that I tell her everything about me.

"Bella?" Jasper asked with a knock on my open door. I jumped a little in surprise.

"Holy crap, Jasper, you scared me."

"Are you okay?" he asked. I nodded weakly. He stared at me in uncertainty for a moment.

"So what do you need?" I asked.

"I need help with lunch. We're gonna have this huge waffle thing when Rose gets back and I wanna get the batter and toppings and everything ready to go so we don't end up eating at three."

I pretended to sigh. "Can't you do it on your own?" I pleaded teasingly.

He rolled his eyes. "I'm serious."

I laughed. "Yeah, I know. Can we listen to my music while we work?"

He nodded. "Yeah, sure. It's better than Rose's. Not as good as mine though," he said with a wink. I smacked him playfully.

"Keep telling yourself that."

We made our way to the kitchen and worked efficiently. By noon, we had everything wrapped in saran wrap and in the fridge. We sat on the couch and watched television in comfortable silence.

"So…" Jasper said slowly. I looked at him in surprise. He looked extremely uncomfortable. When was Jasper ever uncomfortable?

"So?" I pressed.

"Did Rose talk to you this morning?"

I frowned. "Yes, of course, I always talk to her when—" I stopped. Oh. He meant really talk to Rosalie. "Uh, yeah," I said awkwardly.

"This…thing you're hiding," he said slowly, carefully. I could see he was trying to find the right words. "Is it something you can share with me too?"

I sighed. "Yeah. It is." We sat in silence for a while, and I was sure he had gone back to watching T.V.

"I think I'll tell you guys at lunch, if that's all right with you," I said quietly.

I didn't look at him, but I knew he was smiling.

Jasper and I watched T.V. straight until one-thirty, when Rosalie got home. Jasper leapt right up and began cooking the waffles, which made me laugh. I was surprised he had survived this long without snacking. He was a guy, after all.

Jasper moved with Rose and I about three years ago. He's her cousin and didn't have enough money for his own apartment yet. He is also a year younger than Rose and I, but he might as well be five years older, as mature as he is.

Before I knew it, we were sitting and eating in hungry silence. A few minutes later we began to eat slower. Slow enough for conversation. It began to feel uncomfortable. I knew Rose and Jasper were waiting for me to say something.

"We're waiting, Bella," Rose said.

I sighed. "Okay." I paused and thought about where to start.

"My best friend in the world lived next door to me, and was born just a few weeks before me. He and I did everything together. And I mean absolutely everything."

God, just remembering how much I loved my childhood made my heart start to ache.

"We went to school together, did homework together, ate almost every meal at either his house or mine…he even usually slept over." I paused and fidgeted with the edge of the table.

"One thing that made us really connect was music. I loved singing and writing songs, and he loved writing songs and playing guitar. Naturally, around the time we were fifteen, we made a band. We were amazing, everyone said so. It was usually just him and I, writing duets, but sometimes his brother and sister would join us and we would make a song with drums and piano, too. They liked music, too, but no where near as much as him and I did."

I took a deep breath.

"This is where it goes bad, doesn't it?" Rosalie asked me softly.

I nodded. "I started to like him more than as friends, and it wasn't long before I was in love with him. At the graduation party, we performed and then found out that his mom had arranged for a recording company to watch us. They approached us and said that they wanted to make a CD. We were really excited, and agreed. Then around three in the morning, I heard a noise outside and woke up. I looked out the window, and there he was, kissing a girl. Really kissing her."

"No," Rosalie said.

"Yeah." My eyes were actually starting to tear up, and I hated myself for that. This happened seven years ago, for crying out loud!

"And I just couldn't do music with him. I couldn't spend my life working with him every day, looking at him, knowing he was with someone else when I was so in love with him. It wasn't healthy for me, and even though I wanted music so, so much, I wanted him more, and knowing I couldn't have him was too hard for me."

"So you stopped talking to him?" Jasper asked. It was the first time he had spoke through this conversation.

I shook my head and smiled without humor. "No, he stopped talking to me."

They both gasped.

"What an ass," Rose said scathingly.

"No, no," I said, still quick to defend him, even after all these years. "I ruined his chance at the career opportunity of his life. He had the right to be angry. I had known what he wanted since…forever, and I took it from him."

"And you haven't talked to him since?" Jasper asked.

I shook my head. "No. Our relationship was unhealthy. We depended on each other too much. I didn't want that for myself, or for him. So I just ended our friendship."

"And you don't talk to his mom or siblings or anything?" Rose asked.

This question increased the pain in my chest. "No, I don't. I loved his mom so much…she was like my second mom. And his dad, I loved his dad too. His sister was a really, really good friend of mine too, and his brother was the older brother I always wished I had."

They were silent for a few minutes.

"Bella, I think you should call his mom," Rosalie finally said.

"Me too," Jasper agreed.

I gasped. "What? Why?"

"You miss them. I can see you do. You don't have to talk to this guy, actually I would prefer if you didn't, but you should call his parents. I know you miss your wn parents, and you've been missing that part of you since they died. Call his parents."

I didn't speak.

"Bella," Jasper whispered. I looked up at him. "Just try."

We finished eating in silence. It was only when we were almost finished doing dishes that I broke the silence.

"Okay. I'll call her."

I would call Esme.