It was strange being back to the place where his house used to be. There was nothing there except an empty solar and memories. Ichigo had no use for the former, and he was just getting used to have the latter back.
There was still a lot of anger and sorrow inside of him. His situation had not allowed him to deal with the loss of his family and friends properly. Not while having to worry if he was insane.
It was barely a week since he had left the institution, and he had spent most of that time in Urahara's basement. His memories hadn't come to him at one but in small bouts and leaps, and he was glad for that.
He'd had a week long headache as it was, he didn't want to think how painful would have been to remember all at the same time.
It felt good to be back in his spiritual form. He had not realized how much he had got used to the freedom it gave him leaving his body behind, and the power his spiritual form contained. And the fact that he could move undetected through the streets.
This last part was useful. Especially because he was certain he wasn't going to be alone for long.
Renji and Rukia had stayed for a couple of days, managing to put off returning to Soul society thanks to Byakuya. Urahara had been right at least in one account, Rukia told him, Soul Society had been searching for him since his disappearance. He had to guess, since his friends didn't know the reason, that it was a good thing they didn't find him.
It had been good talking to them, and it helped sort out the memories he was getting back like loose pieces of a puzzle. Somehow the last year in that hideous place felt more like a dream now than his previous ones ever did.
But it had been real, and he still got really pissed off when he remembered how exactly he ended up in that place.
"You're easier to find now, Shinigami," Grimmjow's voice at his back announced the arrival of the bastard he had to thank for that one.
"I wasn't exactly hiding," he said turning to look at him.
He had not seen Grimmjow since that day in the institution, but had been certain Grimmjow would appear again sooner or later. He always did. It wasn't even surprising anymore that the moment he laid his eyes on Grimmjow he felt like slamming him against the closest wall. Whether to beat him bloody or fuck him senseless was never completely clear to him.
Most of the times they were the same thing.
"We have some unfinished business, Shinigami," Grimmjow said, stalking to him in a way that put him to mind of a large cat approaching his prey. The smile on his lips was nothing short of feral and it made Ichigo's blood boil with desire. "It's been a long time."
He gritted his teeth, willing his body to behave. "And who do you think I have to thank for that, Grimmjow?" he asked snidely.
Grimmjow cocked an eyebrow at him. "It was that Urahara who left you in that condition, Kurosaki."
"It was you beating the shit out of me what landed me in the fucking loony bin, you bastard!" he finally snapped, taking the remaining step separating him from Grimmjow and pushing him against a wall.
"I don't like being ignored," Grimmjow said harshly, and to Ichigo he sounded like a petulant child.
He took another step forward, his face scant inches from Grimmjow. "I couldn't see you, you idiot!"
Grimmjow glared at him and then he grabbed Ichigo's head and mashed their mouths together. "You can see me now," he growled against Ichigo's mouth, "and you can touch me."
Ichigo opened his mouth and let Grimmjow's tongue invade it, engaging it in a dominance battle he really didn't mind losing. He pressed himself more firmly against Grimmjow's body, the heat radiating off him in waves.
"Yes, and I can fuck you," he said moving his mouth to nip at Grimmjow's neck, his hands already working on divesting him of his clothes.
It was a good thing they were both invisible to the people moving around them on the street, though the idea of someone with enough reiatsu to spot them didn't bother him much. If anything, it just excited him more.
"I believe I called that one, Kurosaki," Grimmjow said, gripping his shoulders and reversing their positions.
He let himself being manhandled, too excited to care who was going to fuck who at the time. There was always time for a little revenge later, and he had wanted Grimmjow. Even if he hadn't been certain Grimmjow was real then.
Their clothes were disposed of in no time, and Ichigo wrestled them both to the ground, rolling until he was pinned under Grimmjow's body. His mouth was insistent and he was feeling slightly light headed, the friction of their bodies and the sensation of all that skin against his almost too much to bear. It had been a long time.
Grimmjow broke the kiss, one of his hands leaving Ichigo's body only to return slightly coated with saliva. Ichigo spread his legs eagerly, and arched up at the feeling of those fingers pushing into him with quick and efficient moves. They were too anxious to care about proper preparation, but it had been a year and he didn't want to end up badly hurt. He was surprised Grimmjow was even bothering to prepare him.
An eternity later, all too soon, the finger withdrew and Grimmjow was pushing inside of him. Ichigo stiffened at the burning pain, forcing himself to relax against the intrusion, and grabbed Grimmjow's head, kissing him savagely.
"Move," he snarled against Grimmjow's mouth when the pain ebbed away, and Grimmjow complied readily.
It was hard and fast from there, Ichigo's back scraping against the hard ground with each thrust, his nails digging in Grimmjow's back. It had been too fucking long.
It was over too soon, Grimmjow pounding him while he kissed savagely, biting his lips until Ichigo was mindless with need. And then there was a hand around his cock, pulling hard, and he was coming, his shout muffled against Grimmjow's mouth. Grimmjow thrust inside of him a few more times before stiffening and coming, slumping on top of Ichigo's body without a care for his comfort.
"That was good, Kurosaki," he said, and he sounded so smug Ichigo wanted to kill him.
"Yeah, now get off me."
They dressed again in silence, Ichigo looking at the solar where his house used to be and then sling down the wall, his eyes closed. He had just done the exact same thing he did last time, but he couldn't get himself to regret it. It wouldn't bring his family back, and this at least reminded him he was alive.
His sanity was still questionable, though.
"I still want to kill that Urahara," Grimmjow said breaking the silence, and Ichigo saw he was sitting next to him, leaning against the wall as well.
He barked a laugh. "You can't kill Urahara, he's stronger than I am and you can't kill me."
Grimmjow glared at him.
"He'd kill you without even releasing his bankai," Ichigo continued seeing how Grimmjow's eyes narrowed, he was enjoying this.
Grimmjow smirked. "Jealous, Kurosaki?"
"Yes," he said, "the one who's going to kill you is going to be me."
He leaned toward Grimmjow and grabbed the front of his shirt, pulling him closer. The kiss wasn't sweet and gentle but hard and possessive, exactly the way he liked it. He wasn't expecting romance, but he had learned a couple of things about himself inside the institution.
"Just so long as you remember I will be the one to kill you," Grimmjow said breaking the kiss and looking at him hungrily. "You're mine."
"I fucking hate you," Ichigo said with feeling and Grimmjow had the nerve to laugh.
"I know. Almost as much as I hate you." Grimmjow stood up, casting a last amused look at Ichigo. "I have no use for love, Ichigo. Hate though, yeah. Hate me as much as you want. Hate only me," he said before disappearing.
Ichigo stayed there, staring at the empty place where Grimmjow had been a second before. He laughed, shaking his head.
Grimmjow would be back, of that he was certain. And he couldn't wait for the next encounter.
Maybe he should consider going back to the institution after all.
He was insane enough to warrant it.